His Mystery Girl
by specialsmiley1315
Summary: Aria Redford drives Daryl Dixon crazy. Everything about her is a mystery. The Winchester's say her past was rough, but he wants answers. Can he get them? Will she trust him enough to open up? Can she allow herself to succumb to her feelings for him? DarylXOC
1. Chapter 1

_How the fuck did this happen?_ I quickly shoved the thought away as my vampire slaying machete entered the decaying cranium of what used to be a businessman. "Aria! I could use some help here!" I pulled my blood soaked weapon from the now permanently dead corpse, and turned to see Dean being cornered; four of the undead pursuing him. I pulled the hunting knife from its sheath at my hip, and with perfect accuracy, threw the knife through the head of the dead closest to Dean.

I was charging forward to attack when the diseased hand, of whatever these were, grabbed my shoulder and pulled me towards its chomping teeth. Before I could even react, Sam's six foot six frame slammed the demon knife into the decaying woman's head. My bright green eyes locked with his gentle brown ones, as I nodded thanks, and both of us went to help Dean. Sam and I worked quickly and efficiently taking each monster down, as Dean worked on the one that threatened to turn him into a happy meal.

Once every zombie lay on dry ground motionless I let my machete rest at my side, brain matter and blood dripping to the brown earth, as Sam pulled the Demon knife from a decaying head. "Well let's not do that again please?" My adrenaline was still pounding heavily in my veins as I ignored Dean's comment, asking the two, "Any scratches or bites?" Two sets of eyes locked on me, and then turned towards each other. Concern burned within both men, as they silently communicated with each other, and turned their attention back to me, heads shaking 'no'. A breathe, I didn't realize I was holding, whooshed out of me with the answer. "Are you?" Dean's gruff voice asked. I looked at the two and also shook my head.

All three of our shoulders slumped in relief. I looked at the corpse littered ground, and that question slipped through my mind again..._How did this happen?_ This wasn't anything like the Croatoan virus, so it couldn't be demons, and everything up in Heaven has been quiet from last we heard. _Cas._ _Where the fuck was that angel?_ Ever since the dead began to rise we've been calling for him, but nothing. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe something was wrong up there?

"Aria?" Sam's voice pulled me from deep within my mind. "Huh?" Sam sighed, "We were talking about our next step. What do you think?" My hands came to my face as I thought, "Well, this is the second largest group we've come up against since being on the highway. It's probably best to stay away from it, and take our chances out here in the woods."

"Sounds good to me. Only problem is, we have no supplies. Everything is still in the Impala on that damn highway," Dean said with aggravation. "Well," I started, forcing a smile onto my sweat and dirt stained face, "I guess we know where we are heading."


	2. Chapter 2

Ch. 2

The three of us moved through the woods on high alert. Dean took point, with me following, and Sam bringing up the rear. We lead the dead about a mile into the woods, hoping to thin the group out before we attacked. It had been about a half hour into our walk back before we could start to make out the highway. Dean's shoulders tensed as we grew closer, and I could tell he was listening and seeing everything at once. His year in Purgatory made him a strong tracker and better hunter. I noticed it when he came back, but now with the world gone to shit, it seemed as though it was even more noticeable.

Dean got a faraway look in his eyes, when he was fighting. It seemed as though he was reliving his days in Purgatory. In all honesty, he probably was. He didn't speak much about that year, but from what I had gathered it seemed like this world had become the new Purgatory.

Dean's hand shot up, stopping Sam and I. My hand tightened on my weapon as I surveyed the woods for the threat. Sam turned his back on me, and watched behind us, as Dean continued to watch our front. My eyes darted through the green forest while I listened intently for any of the tell-tale signs of the dead. I strained to hear any moans or groans, but was only met with the faint buzzing of the insects and occasional chirping of birds.

Not seeing any threat, Sam whispered, "Dean, what is it? I'm not seeing anything." But then I heard it. It wasn't the moans of the dead, instead the familiar rumble of the Winchester's beloved Impala. Dean took off into a full blown sprint, Sam and I close behind. We burst through the woods just in time to see the black beauty drive off.

"HEY!" Dean screamed as they tore off down the highway. But it was too late; the car was already fading away, with all our supplies locked within. "Son of a bitch!" Dean yelled, kicking the door of a car. Sam was bent over breathing heavily as Dean paced back and forth cursing loudly. I tuned out Dean's ranting and studied our surroundings. Surely, with the roar of the Impala and Dean's yells, the dead would be drawn to this area, and we had to be ready to fight. Sam took one last deep breath, straightened up, and walked over to the fuming Dean.

He looked drained. His walk was sluggish, his eyes weak and empty, and his voice carried like an extended sigh. "What do you want to do?" he questioned. Dean gave out an exasperated sigh, dragging his dirty hands down his face, "I don't know, Sammy. The car had everything we needed…water, food, weapons, ammo. I only have one other clip, my knife, and the machete." He leaned heavily against one of the many abandoned vehicles. "You got any ideas?" Sam shook his head sadly in response. We really didn't have many options. Staying on the highway with no protection was a death wish. We couldn't afford to run into another big group like before, and it seemed as though those things were attracted to the highways.

I turned to the brothers and explained, "We stick to the plan. We go into the woods. If we stay out here exposed like this, we're ringing a dinner bell. At least in the woods we can find water, food, and we can climb the trees at night for shelter. As far as I have seen those things can't climb." Sam and Dean looked at me, and I saw in their eyes they knew I was right. "It's not like we haven't camped in the woods before boys," I said with a smile. Dean gave a hearty laugh, as Sam grumbled about hating the woods.

_Flashback:_

_We couldn't stay in any motels or hotels because of the Leviathans. We drove through the forest for hours looking for abandoned homes, but found nothing. Instead, we found an old camping ground. I was tired of driving and just needed some fresh air. I suggested that we stay the night, and with a little persuasion the boys agreed. We made a little fire and sat side by side on a fallen log. The night was peaceful with the sky clear and bursting with stars. Sam suggested sleeping in the car, but I said it wouldn't be true camping if we did. He disagreed but slept outside anyway. In the morning, I woke to a slew of curses and grumbles. Then I heard Dean's laugh ring out through the still forest. I sat up and saw Sam's skin was red and welted, and he was scratching violently. In his sleep he rolled into a bush of poison ivy. Both Dean and I laughed the whole way to the pharmacy, and have never let Sam live it down. _


	3. Chapter 3

_"People eating each other?"_

_I tucked a piece of my light brown hair behind my ear, "Yeah that's what Garth said." Dean shook his head in disbelief, as Sam began to ask more questions, "Does he have any idea of what it is? The only other time people were eating each other was when Famine was running loose." _

"_He's got no clue. He's been in the town for a couple of days questioning around, but he says he's never heard of something like this." I replied deep in thought. "Well we're about to find out," Dean said pulling into the parking lot of an empty bar. _

_It was early evening on a Friday night. Bars were usually busy by this time with everyone stopping in for a cold one after work. Yet, the lot was dead empty except for a few other vehicles and us. As soon as we stepped out of the Impala, Garth popped out of his run down GTO. "Hey guys," he said with a slight wave. _

_To this day I still wondered how he was alive. He was nothing but a twig compared to other hunters. Monsters tossed him around like he was a rag doll. The few times I did hunt with him, it ended with me saving his ass. But, Garth was a smart kid. He was like Bobby, a book of knowledge on the Supernatural. Not to mention, the kid grew on you. He was just a pile of mushy happiness._

"_Hey Garth, so you say people are eating each other?" Dean asked. Garth shook his head, "Yeah started about two days ago from what I can gather. Police say the hospitals are overrun with sick people. Sheriff said it started with the town drunk. From what he told me, guy got really sick, and then was walking down the street and decided to attack this lady. She got sick, then her husband. Sheriff said others were going through the same thing." _

"_Did they arrest the guy that attacked the woman?" Sam asked, his eyes a storm of thoughts. "They shot him to death. I looked over the witness accounts. They said the man just kept biting her; actually they used the words "ripping her flesh from her bones". Cops put four rounds into him, and he still didn't go down. Wasn't until they shot him in the head he stopped."_

_We stood in silence, processing the information, as the bar door opened and a lanky businessman stumbled out. Nobody paid him much attention, but something about the man seemed off. His whole body was limp, almost lifeless. His movements made his body sway all over the place, and I swear I could hear a low growl coming from the man. _

"_Guys?" I said, not taking my eyes off the man. He was slowly making his way toward us, and my body screamed to run. "What?" Garth said, looked at me, and then all three of them followed my gaze to the man. We all stared, as Dean commented, "Looks like somebody's calling a cab." At that same moment, the man's head lifted up and I saw a cloud of foggy blue. My eyes quickly searched the rest of the man's features and found a large amount of blood on the man's neck that had soaked his shoulder and front of his body. The four of us took a collective gasp and a step back. _

"_What the hell?" Sam said in disbelief. Garth slowly began to walk towards the man, speaking softly, "Sir? Are you okay?" The man reacted to Garth's voice, moving towards him. My body was screaming dangerous, as Garth got closer and closer. "Garth, I don't think that's a good idea," I said. "What do you mean? The guy's hurt and needs help," he said, taking his eyes off the man to look at me. _

_In that moment the businessman lurched forward, grabbed Garth's arm, and sunk his teeth into his flesh. Garth's scream rang out into the sky, as Sam, Dean, and I rushed to his aid. Sam grabbed the man by the shoulders, and pulled him off of Garth and through him away from us. As the man was pulled, he ripped a chunk of skin and muscle out of Garth's arm. Garth fell to the ground with Dean at his side, trying to calm him down, and applying pressure on the wound. _

_I pulled my gun from my jean's waistband, and aimed at the man that was now stumbling after Sam. My mind screaming shoot the head and I did. The man's body slumped backwards, before collapsing to his knees dead. Sam looked at me in shock and horror, "You killed him." I couldn't say anything. My body was frozen in shock; I killed someone and didn't think twice about it. 'He was already dead'. No, that man was alive. The dead don't walk, that only happens in movies, but then again ghosts and vampires are in movies and their real. _

"_Garth needs a hospital now. He's losing a lot of blood," Dean said with panic. I shook the thoughts from my head, and helped Dean load a pale Garth into the backseat with me. We pulled out of the parking lot in a rush, but not before I saw a man, with his intestines hanging out of his belly, walk out of the open bar door. _

'_What's happening?'_

My eyes snapped open in shock. My breathing fast and my body soaked with sweat_. It was just a nightmare. You're okay._ I closed my eyes trying to steady my breathing. I looked up and saw Sam's limp legs hanging over the branch he was resting in. To my right, I heard the quiet snoring of Dean. He was sitting with his legs dangling off the branch; his back leaned against another strong branch and his head lying on the trunk.

His body was tense even as he slept, and if I had to guess Sam was the same. I know I was. You never actually slept now. Your body was constantly on alert, ready to snap into action at the slightest sound. It also didn't help that you knew if you moved in your sleep, you could fall out of a tree and become zombie food.

I sighed heavily, my thoughts tumbling back to my dream, or more so memory. Garth didn't make it. He died from the blood loss and shock. When we got to the hospital, the Army had overrun the place. We rushed him into the ER, but the soldiers just grabbed him and hauled him off to somewhere. They started questioning us about being bit or a fever when the whole place erupted in screams. People, who looked worse than the man at the bar, began to flood the hallways, attacking anything that was not them. The Army started opening fire on everyone, even the living. We got out of there before anything could happen to us.

I sunk lower against the rough trunk, as my eyes threatened to drip with tears_. No. You're not going to cry. You've lost people before, and got over it. Lock it down._ My chest was tight, but I forced myself to calm down. After the hospital, we learned that if you got bit or scratched by one of the undead you eventually turned. The boys and I never talked about it, but we knew that Garth had suffered that fate. Sometime after that the three of us made a promise to each other. We promised that no matter how hard it was, none of us would wander this world as one of them.

The jet black sky slowly faded to a faint baby blue, as sun streaks bled through the thick foliage. A tiny smile made its way onto my worn face, as I watched the glowing orb rise higher and higher, adding dashes of orange and pinks to the morning sky. Even in the midst of all this chaos there was still beauty.

I sat, staring at the work of nature until the stirring of stiff legs from above woke me from my trance. "Mornin'" I called out faintly. Sam's arm reached out and held onto a thin branch as he looked down to me with sleep heavy eyes, "Hey." His voice was raspy, and he gave me a gentle smile before calling out to Dean. "Dean, wake up." Dean's right eye shot open then closed as he untangled his arms from his chest and rubbed his face roughly. He groaned, but didn't say anything else. I stretched my arms up above my head, and then looked around.

"Coast looks clear," I said, swinging my legs to one side, so that I was no longer straddling the branch, "Meet you guys down there." I slipped my body off the branch, landing softly on a sturdy one directly below me. "Be careful," Dean called out. I looked up with a smile and said, "Always." Problem was, as I said this, I was reaching out to grab another branch and missed. The stretching of my body caused me to fall forward and plummet to the ground. I landed on the unforgiving earth with a loud thud, and a sharp pain in my ankle.

"Aria!" the brothers called out in alarm, as I heard them quickly making their way down. "I'm fine!" I answered back, but as I looked up my heart stopped. I was still lying on the ground, as two corpses turned and came at me with their dead arms outstretched. _I take that back, not fine_. I reached for my knife at my hip. I grabbed it and readied to aim, when two gunshots rang out. The dead's heads rocked back, brain matter spraining out behind them in a mist, as they crumpled to the ground.

A minute later, I heard two faint thumps. Sam and Dean rushed to my side, pulling me up by my arms. "You okay?" Sam questioned quickly as he checked for any injuries. "Said I'm fine," I grumbled angrily. I was embarrassed at my lack of coordination, and the brothers having to save me. I moved forward, but nearly fell right back down from the pain that spiked in my leg. "Fuck!" I mumbled, as two sets of strong arms grabbed me tightly, holding me up.

"What leg?" Dean asked, kneeling in front of me. Sam slipped his arm around my waist to hold me up, as I told Dean the left leg. His firm hands undid the laces of my black combat boot, and carefully pulled my foot out. He pulled the cuff of my jeans up exposing my already swollen ankle. He grabbed it gently, and I hissed out in pain. Dean rolled the cuffs back down and slipped it back into my boot. "You sprained it pretty bad. There's a lot of swelling and some bruises are starting to form."

Why does the universe always screw with us? "Fuck, I'm sorry guys." I know it wasn't my fault, but I still felt bad. We had to waste two bullets because of me and now they were going to have to help me walk. "It was an accident Aria; anyway we should have known better than to let you climb in a tree. You're pretty clumsy on flat ground, had to assume it was going be worse in a tree" Dean said with a grin.

"Shut up," I grumbled, as Dean slipped an arm around my waist. I wrapped an arm around each of their necks, as they help me walk.


	4. Chapter 4

Ch. 4

The hot Georgia sun was at its peak and relentless. The overhead canopy of thick green locked the heat into the forest. Sweat was pouring down us like it was raining. Sam's blue and grey striped button up sleeves were rolled up tight against his muscular biceps. Dean had taken off his button up and had it tied around his waist. His light grey shirt was now dark with sweat. My once white shirt was now turning beige from the dirt and blood. The sweat made the oversize shirt cling to my wet back, making me even more miserable. My long waves were pulled into a messy braid that I pulled over my right shoulder. Didn't want the dead sneaking up behind and using it as a leash to pull me to them.

We had been walking in the forest for hours and had found nothing. No water and no food. Our bodies were drained, and the extra weight of me on the boys was wearing them down. I had tried to put some pressure on it while we walked, but ended up making the pain worse.

"Hold up, I need a break." Sam breathed out. His long hair was damp, and his fingers had pulled it back away from his red face. Dean grunted in response, and the two lead me to the closest tree, propping me up against it. The woods were silent, save for the insects and our heaving breathing.

"Sit, you guys need to rest your feet," I commanded in a tired voice. Sam plopped down immediately, while Dean took one last sweep of the area and settled down. Sam laid his head in his head and stared out into nothing, deep within his thoughts. Dean had his knees up with his arms resting on the tops of them, and his head down. We were wiped, and I allowed my eyes to close for a second. Even if the ground was rough, and my leg was throbbing, it was the most relaxed I had been in a while.

I was basking in the moment, when the snap of twigs in the distant had my eyes open in a second and my head whipping around for the source. Nothing to my right, but when I looked to my left I saw them. At least four of the undead had found us. Their decaying legs trudged slowly through the underbrush, but the need for food was driving them to go faster.

Dean and Sam were up in second, grabbing me roughly and dragging me forward. I almost stumbled, but Dean's arm snaked around my waist and pulled me upright. The boys tried running, but I couldn't keep up. We ended up doing a walk/jog to put as much distance between us and the walking corpses. The brothers and I were doing well, until my foot caught a rock, sending me to the ground, and the boys tumbling down with me. "Shit!" I moaned out. Sam lifted me up, but my body was spent. The lack of water, the heat, and the pain were too much for me to keep moving. "No, stop. I can't go any farther. We got to take them out."

"Aria, we need to move now," Dean growled, wrapping his arm around me again and moving. Only my legs didn't want to work, and Dean ended up dragging me. Sam came up behind me, and swept out my legs, lifting me to his chest. I wrapped my arms around his neck, as the brothers starting moving again.

I listened to Sam's heart pumping rapidly as he kept up with Dean's pace. But we only got so far before Sam and I fell behind. "Dean!" he called out, "Aria's right. We got to take these suckers out. We aren't making progress with her hurt and as weak as we are." Dean's eyes were wild with panic. He didn't know what to do. If they fought, Sam and he would have to take out more zombies than they could handle, while protecting Aria. "No, we keep moving. Hand her to me, I'll carry her."

The moaning was growing closer; Sam sat me down on my good leg as I shook my head no. "Prop me up against a tree. I'll distract them while you guys take them out," I said pulling my machete out. We didn't have time to debate this. The fall earlier had allowed the dead to close the much-needed distance. Dean was about to start arguing, when I pulled my gun from my waistband. "If they get too close," I said with finality.

Sam and Dean propped me standing up against a large oak. The boys backed away, Dean shaking his head, and Sam's eyes filled with worry. We were family. They weren't just friends, but my brothers. I know they hated putting me in harm's way, but it was best. I took my machete, and sliced my hand.

"Hey!" I called out towards the walking dead, "Come and get it!" and I squeezed my hand so blood dripped to the ground. The corpse's noses went straight into the air, and they all rushed towards me.


	5. Chapter 5

Ch. 5

They grew closer and closer. My hands tightened their grip on my weapon as I tried to even my weight out. _Come on, come on._ Just a few more steps and WHAM! My machete sunk deep into the side of the dead head. I pulled it out quickly and readied myself for the next one, which was a step away. The two behind it being taken down swiftly by the brothers. I raised my machete high over my head, and smashed into the corpse, causing me to lose my balance and go down with my kill.

I was lying on top of the dead body, blood oozing from its split cranium. For a second I thought I was going to hurl. The smell of death overwhelming my senses and making me gag. Sam grabbed me and helped me up. His tender eyes seething with worry. "Good?" He asked with his eyebrows all scrunched up, worry lines creasing his forehead. I nodded my head slowly and leaned into his chest. He wrapped me in his large arms and squeezed tightly, as my slender ones wrapped around his waist.

Sam pulled away, and tousled my already messy hair, as Dean's hand patted my shoulder. I looked up into his green eyes. They were lighter than mine, with hints of browns and blues. He gave me a gentle smile, and said, "Next time, the plan doesn't involve bait." I laughed softly, "You're just jealous because they were giving me all the attention." Dean shook his head as both brothers slipped their arms around me and helped me walk.

"Seriously A, no more of this reckless crap. We need to be smart about this. I can't lose you or Sam." Dean's voice was stern. I knew the plan was stupid, I knew that I could have been bit, but we couldn't keep running. Sam's arm tightened around my waist, telling me not to argue. But that didn't stop me.

"I wasn't being reckless Dean. I could handle it, and I was prepared even if I couldn't" The anger was bubbling up within me. He had no right to say I was reckless; what about all those times he threw his life around like it was nothing? My plan wasn't reckless. It was thought out; I knew that if I couldn't handle the hand to hand fighting with the walking dead, then I had my gun. It's not like I went in half-cocked. No, I knew this plan would work and that we come out in one piece.

"Besides it's not like you've never been reckless before." The thought tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop it. Dean slipped away from me and stood very pissed off in front of me. "Exactly, and look what happened. Do you want to die? You want Sam and me to go through that same pain you went through?"

"No! Of course I don't!" I yelled. The memories of all we'd been through flooded through me. I held back any tears that threatened to show, and lowered my voice, "You're the only family I have left."

'_Ari!' the children's voices screamed out._ The memory slipped causing my breath to stop_. No. Don't think about them_. I shook my head taking deep breath. "I'm not going out to get myself killed," I looked him in the eye, "Honestly, Dean it was the only way. It was going to happen sooner or later. I figured it was better to attack them when we still had energy."

Dean saw that she was right. When he looked her in the eyes, there was pain. Pain that had been locked up for years, he knew she was thinking of that night. He saw her usual strong façade breaking down slowly. They were all they had left in this world, and in all honesty he was being a hypocrite because he would have done the same thing.

Dean walked up to Aria and cupped her cheek. "I'm sorry A. I just...I can't lose you guys," he clapped his other hand tight on Sam's shoulder, "I overreacted a bit. I know that if the roles were reversed I would have done the same."

I looked up at Dean and gave him a bright smile, "You always hate it when I'm right." Sam gave a small laugh, "Let's keep moving, we only have a couple more hours of light, and we don't want clumsy here walking in the dark," Sam said ruffling my hair like always. "Hey!" I said, trying to swat his hand away and not lose my balance. He just laughed more, as we began to move again.

Sam had always been the baby brother to Dean, but when I came around that changed. He got to act like a big brother. It was weird for me at first, going from being an older sibling myself to the young one. That's probably why Dean and I butted heads a lot. I was a protector and so was he. So Sam, never being an older sibling, always backed me up against him. Sam wasn't as protective either. I mean don't get me wrong, at times it was like I was a small mouse being watched by two hawks, but Sam let me have my space. He knew what it was like to be suffocated by an over protective sibling.

A snap of a little branch, caused the three of us to stop dead in our tracks. My gun already out and pointed at the source. Only the source was human, and it had a crossbow aimed right at my head.


	6. Chapter 6

Ch. 6

Daryl's POV

Green eyes. _Fuck me._ Why did she have to have green eyes? My bright blue eyes searching hers, only to find a mystery. Her eyes were like the endless flow of the ocean, which kept pulling you in deeper and deeper, till you couldn't go back. The girl's light brown hair tied hastily into a single braid that draped down her shoulder. Her bangs dancing in the breeze around her sun kissed face. That tan covering every inch of exposed skin, and making her skin glow. Her lips were pressed tightly together, forming a pale pink line of a mouth. _Hot damn, it's the fucking apocalypse and she looks like a fucking model, even covered in blood and guts. _

Her body was toned. Her arms were slender, but showed strength. She knew how to handle a gun for sure, as I stared at the weapon. I moved quickly to her legs, and noticed that her left leg was bent slightly, and most of her weight was leaning on the right.

My fingers tightened on the trigger, as I locked eyes with the endless orbs of green, "You bit?" Her eyes never leaving mine, answered, "No. Are you?" Her voice was like a gentle breeze, but laced with a cold edge. I fired back, "Ain't the one limping 'round am I?" To my surprise the girl actually smiled. Not a full-blown smile, but the corners of her pursed lips twisted up.

"Sprained ankle," she replied simply, "fell out of a tree." My eyebrows furrowed in confusion, "What you doin' in a tree in the first place?" "Sleeping, it's not safe on the ground with the dead wandering around."

I couldn't help it, maybe it was my manly instincts talking, but I started to like her. There was confidence in her stance. She looked like the kind of girl who's been through hell and back, and is ready to take on more. There was more though, something that I couldn't place. She was like a puzzle.. You thought you knew who she was, but then you dug a little deeper and had to start all over.

The two men holding onto her tightened their hold. The short hair one was tracing my every step. His eyes glued to my trigger finger, ready to fight. The tall one was glancing from me to the girl. He looked a little nervous. Like he wanted to say something, but at the same time trusted her to handle it. _Wonder if they got a piece of that ass?_ I kicked myself mentally, telling that little voice to go to hell.

It was silent for a while. We continued to watch each other like hawks, until finally she gave out a loud sigh. "Look man, we're not going to attack you," she said lowering her weapon slowly, showing that what she said was true. I lowered my crossbow from her face to the ground, but still ready to fire in a moment's notice. "And it looks like you're not going to attack us." "Not unless you give me a reason," I responded gruffly. She nodded, "Do you know where a river or creek is around here? Our supplies got stolen, and we haven't had anything for a couple of days."

They looked whipped. Their bodies weak from the dehydration and the intense heat they've suffered. There was nothing around here for miles. The only thing close to water was the little lake at the quarry. I could lead them back to camp. Get the girl something for her ankle, give them some food and water, but it was hard enough trying to feed the group now. "Can you hunt?" Deal breaker. If they can hunt they will be useful, and not just another mouth to feed. All three of them nodded yes.

"But unless you got another one of those crossbows, we' can't be very helpful. A gunshot is going to lead zombies' right to you," the short haired one replied. Man had a point. "Snares," her voice carried out. I looked at her again, those green eyes burning with the same mystery. "I know how to set a snare trap." _Well there you go Dixon. All three know how to hunt, and one knows how to set snares, guess they're coming to camp with you. _

"Follow me. Camp has food and water, and some medical supplies." The three of them nodded. "Thank you," the tall one said, "We just need a place to rest for a day and then we will be gone." My chest tightened at the words, but I brushed it off as nothing.

"Whatever," I grumbled as I started back towards the camp. The walk was silent, except for the sounds of nature. I could hear soft murmuring from the trio, but nothing that I could make out. "Aria Redford," she called out. I turned around to face the girl, "What?" Her face blank of emotion said, "My name, it's Aria Redford. These two are the Winchesters. This is Dean," as she looked at the short-haired one, "and this is Sam," looking up to the face of the tall one. I nodded, "Daryl. Daryl Dixon."

The blank expression crumpled away and she smiled, her eyes crinkling in the corners, "Nice to meet you Daryl."


	7. Chapter 7

"How much farther?" Dean breathed out heavily. Daryl's southern drawl, called back, "Not much." _Real informative, jackass. _The boy's started to stumble more so now. The lack of water and food from the past two days really affecting us. Plus, the exertion from carrying me just made it more difficult.

We had been hiking in the woods for over two hours, before I could start to see the tree line thinning, exposing parked vehicles and wandering people. The three of us gave a sigh of relief. _Finally!_ My ankle throbbed uncontrollably, and I started to feel slightly light-headed. All I wanted to do was be able to sit down and not worry about some dead person sneaking up on me.

I heard voices calling to each other as we got closer, passing through an assortment of colored tents. As we reached the center of the camp, I saw three guys coming towards us. A man with curly dark hair was carrying a shotgun, and the man to his right had a long white beard with a rifle over his shoulder. The other man was in overalls tied at the waist carrying a shovel.

"Who you got there Daryl?" the curly-haired man called out. Daryl ignored the man, and walked off to an isolated part of camp, and began to gut his kills. The curly-haired one shook his head slightly, and turned back to us with an outstretched hand. "Shane Walsh," he greeted. Sam stepped away from me and shook the outstretched hand, "Sam Winchester. This is my brother Dean, and our friend Aria."

"Nice to meet ya folks," Shane said. He looked at me then, taking in my body quickly. _Men._ I wasn't pissed at the guy. Actually, I was used to it. Spending most of my times in bars with the Winchesters, a lot of guys checked me out and tried hitting on me. It was funny really, some of the lines guys used as pick-ups. Dean noticed, and his arm tightened protectively around my waist.

The brothers didn't like the way guys looked at me. I didn't really care. Most of the guys that hit on me were just stupid, drunk, and horny men. Whenever I went to the bars with the boys, most men figured that I was one of their women, so they never tried hitting on me. I also gave off this 'don't talk to me' vibe, which most men picked up on. It wasn't that I was anti-social; it was just that most of the time we went to the bar it was after completing another job. I would be exhausted, and just wanted to relax with the boys.

Shane looked at my leg with curiosity burning in his brown eyes, "What's wrong with your leg." Dean answered for me, saying, "She sprained it falling out of a tree. Got a place I could set her down and wrap it up?" The man with the white beard spoke up then; "I'll go and get something to wrap it up with," retreating towards the RV. Shane beckoned for us to follow him as he led us to a ring of seats with a fire pit centered in the middle.

Sam and Dean gently sat me down on a log, each taking a spot beside me with loud sighs of relief. By now a group of people had started to form around us. Their stares all asking the same questions, _are they dangerous? Can we trust them? Who are they?_ Shane stood in front of us, his shotgun hanging loosely at his side. "I'm sure you guys are exhausted, but I have a few questions for you?" The man who reminded me of your typical grandfather stepped out of the RV and came toward us, handing me the gauze wrapping.

I nodded 'thank you' towards the man, and leaned down to untie my boot. Dean slipped off the log, kneeling in front of me, and began to wrap my purpling ankle. "Damn Aria. You really did a number on yourself." he murmured, concern dripping from his voice. I remained silent, with my eyes trained on Dean's wrapping, as Shane and Sam went back and forth asking questions and answering them.

My body ached all over and my mouth was as dry as a desert. _Couldn't we get some water already? _I was annoyed with all the questions. I understood that Shane was just looking out for the people in this camp, but did this have to turn into a game of twenty questions? When Sam finished explaining, Dean finished with my ankle, and sat back down on the log. It wasn't the most comfortable thing, but at the moment it felt like sitting on a cloud.

"Well, you guys are more than welcome to stay here with us. You seem like good people, and your friend here is hurt. We can make a run into town and get some supplies for you guys. Bigger groups are better for protecting against walkers." Shane explained. "Walkers?" Dean questioned. A young Asian guy stepped forward explaining, "Yea it's what we call the dead. Seemed appropriate since all they do is walk around." _Yeah and eat people. Could call them chompers. _

"So, do you guys want to stay?" Shane asked. The three of us looked at each other, silently communicating. They did have food and water, and they were willing to get supplies for us. They also seemed like good people, even Daryl, who seemed to seclude himself from the group. _Wonder why? _I looked at both the brothers and shrugged my shoulders leaving it up to them. At the moment I didn't really care. I knew that we were staying. My ankle was going no good for a week. "Yeah," Dean started, "we really appreciate this, and we promise to help in any way possible. We told the crossbow guy that we could hunt."

Shane's eyes seemed to widen with that statement. "That's great! Daryl's the one that does all the hunting for us, but it's great to have more than one person to rely on." A woman with long brunette hair cleared her throat, and stepped forward with a small smile, "Welcome to our group. I'm Lori," she said extending her arm to us. I reached up from my spot on the log and took her slender hand in a firm shake, "Aria," I said. The brother's each shook Lori's hand and introduced themselves.

Afterwards, Shane introduced the rest of the group to us. The man with the beard's name was Dale, and the other man who first greeted us was Jim. The small Asian kid's name was Glenn. Then there was Andrea and Amy, Jacqui and T-Dog, Carol, Sophia, and Ed, who I immediately hated. I could tell by the way he hovered over Carol that he was a controlling husband who probably beat the crap out of her. Then there was the Morales family, and then Lori's little boy, Carl.

I had greeted everybody with smiles, but when I saw Carl my mind went on lock down. He looked just like..._NO! Don't think about him. It's not him. _My body was rigid, and I knew my eyes were wide like saucers. Sam caught my reaction quickly and started to rub small circles on my back, whispering the same mantra in my head. Carl seemed a little scared of my reaction, and that snapped me out of it. I gave him a big smile and reached out my hand, "Hi Carl," he took my hand timidly, "I'm sorry about that, you just remind me of someone." I explained quietly. Carl's curiosity peaked, and he asked innocently, "Who?"

But I couldn't answer him. I didn't talk about it. Not even after all these years. That night and those people were to never be spoken about. Sam and Dean knew this, and answered for me, "Just somebody that meant a lot to her." I knew that he wasn't satisfied with the answer but that was all he was going to get.

Some of the members of the group had noticed our interaction, and had looks sympathy. All of that directed towards me. They probably thought I had a little boy like Carl that died during this, but they were so wrong. I hated that. I didn't need their sympathy. I had gotten enough of that when it all happened.

"Well, well, what do we have here? How did a fine piece of ass like you wander up here?" said the southern man. He had a close shaven head of blonde hair, and hooded blue eyes. _That looked really familiar. _He walked up to us with confidence and openly eye fucked my body as he licked his lips. "A mighty fine ass," he mumbled. The boys were pissed, their anger radiating around me. Shane barked at the man, "Merle! What did I tell you?"

I locked eyes with the man called Merle, those blues eyes really familiar. But I shook that thought away, and glared at him. I put on a sickly sweet smile, and in a warning voice asked, "And how would you know I have a fine piece of ass?" Merle gave a leering smile, "Watched it while you came into camp, sugar lips." I shook my head, "We must not be talking about the same ass because if you were looking at mine, you would have found a pick fuck off planted there," my voice as cold as steel.

Merle's smile only widened, as he retorted, "Feisty one ain't ya? I always like a girl with a little fight." My patience was running extremely thin. "Look asshole, I'm really not in the mood to deal with your bullshit. So, please, fuck off." But Merle did the exact opposite. He took a few steps closer to me. His eyes locked with my dark green ones. "Got quite a mouth on you. Should be using it for better things." he said, grabbing his crotch, and licking his chapped lips. _That's it. _Sam and Dean felt the same. I could feel their bodies recoil like a rattle snake ready to attack. They were about to pounce on Merle, but I was quicker. I thrust myself up from the log, and launched myself on top of the larger man. He fell on his back with a loud grunt, and my knife to his glistening throat.

"Why don't I take that dick of yours and shove it in your fucking mouth?" I hissed. Merle just smiled slightly, "You're not gonna hurt me sugar lips." My anger peaked to its max. I cut just enough to show him that I was not screwing around. His eyes widened in surprise, as a little trail of red streamed down his neck. "You sure now?" Suddenly, a shadow fluttered over us, and I felt a slight point of something sharp-pointed at my head. "Best let him go little girl," his southern drawl dripping with threat. I looked up into his dark blue eyes. _Bingo. _Merle's eyes were lighter than Daryl's, but just by looking at them I knew they were brothers.

We stared each other down, trying to figure each other out. His face gave nothing away. It was a mask of no emotion, except anger. His eyes squinted against the sunlight, his jaw clenched tightly, and his thin lips pressed together firmly forming a thin line of pink. However, his eyes gave him away. It wasn't obvious, but if you looked closely you could see the panic and worry. But all that was hidden behind a blue fire of violence.

"Everybody just calm down! Both of you put your weapons down!" Shane yelled. The whole group was panicking. Sam and Dean were ready to jump Daryl the second they thought he was going to fire. "Just shoot the crazy bitch already!" Merle yelled from underneath my knife. Yet, Daryl and I stood firm, eyeing each other's movements carefully. "Aria let him go." Sam's voice was commanding, but dripped with worry. The boys were useless. They couldn't make a move without risking me getting injured.

_Me and my fucking pride. _Whenever people challenged me, I would never back down, especially against men. I was an excellent hunter. I was as good as the Winchesters. I was just as wanted as the brothers when it came to Heaven and Hell. So, when other hunters came up to me, and told me that I wasn't capable, I would show them just how capable I was. Those guys were rewarded with either a black eye or a hospital visit. Same went for Merle. I wasn't going to let him think that I was just another 'piece of ass'. But, now I had to think about Sam and Dean. We needed to be a part of this group to survive.

I had proven my point to Merle, and honestly I was just a little strung out from the past few days. My nerves and temper frayed. So, anything like Merle's behavior was going to set me off. I heaved a loud sigh, and dropped my knife from Merle's throat. Daryl kept his crossbow trained on me even as I stood up, and Merle began screaming at the boy's that I needed to be kept on a leash.

"Man, you better keep your mouth shut!" Dean barked. "Make me!" Merle replied back. That was enough of an invitation for Dean, he went to lunge forward, but Sam and I pulled him back. Shane stepped in too, pushing Merle back. Daryl had long since forgotten about me, and had turned to his brother, "Merle! Shut the fuck up man!" The older Dixon had shoved Shane away, and Daryl was now pulling his brother back away from us. Merle turned on Daryl, "Don't tell me what to do! You should have shot the fucking bitch! Did your balls fall off Darylina?" he mocked. But Daryl just took it, he never once talked back. Merle saw his submission, and with a grin walked away from us mumbling 'pussy' as he passed Daryl.

My green eyes settled on his blue ones, as he turned and followed his brother to their isolated tents. The entire group breathed in relief. Glenn walked over to us, with a look of awe. "That was pretty awesome," he boasted, "Nobody's stood up to Merle Dixon like that." I shook my head. It wasn't awesome in any way. For all I knew I could have gotten the three of us thrown out of camp for my stupid actions. Glenn looked confused at my response, as Shane stepped forward, "Actually it was nice seeing somebody put Merle in his place. Guy walks around like he owns everything." his voice coated in disgust. "So you're not pissed about what I did?" I asked surprised. "Well violence isn't the way to handle anything, but if you're worried about me forcing you guys to leave, it's not an issue." I sighed in relief. "You're skilled fighters and I need people who can protect this group, but if something like that happens again we don't resolve it by slitting people's throats."

We all nodded in agreement. "Thank you again for taking us in." Sam expressed gratefully. "We living have to stick together. Glenn will make a run into the city tomorrow to get you guys some supplies, so if you want anything make sure you write it down for him." Shane explained. "One of us will go with him." Dean offered. Glenn stepped in suddenly saying, "No, no, no. Look I appreciate the offer, but I'm quicker on my own."Dean didn't argue. He wanted a day where he could relax and not worry about staying alive. "We got an extra tent you guys can use for now, as long as you three don't mind sharing." "No, it's fine, and again thanks for everything." Sam said. Shane just nodded and left to get our tent for us.

The Winchester's and I spent the rest of the evening recuperating. Sam and Dean set our tent up, and some members of the group had given us spare clothes to change into while they washed our grime soaked ones. The brother's went around talking to all the survivors, getting to know everyone and offering up any kind of help. I, however, sat peacefully watching the sun sink below the forest horizon. Nature mesmerized me. The colors the sky could paint put all artists to shame. But, the most fascinating thing about nature was despite all the horrors in the world, it kept a peaceful feeling.

"Remind you of home?" Dean asked taking a spot next to me. "Yeah," sadness heavy in my single word reply. I had never gone back to my hometown after that night all those years ago. That was my biggest regret in life. Those woods were my sanctuary. I had spent my entire childhood and teens in those woods. Sitting here now, an overwhelming sense of nostalgia overtook me. I missed those simple days. Being a child free to explore and not have a care in the world.

I didn't realize, but most of the group was now seated around the fire with plates of food. "Where was home? Andrea asked kindly, while Sam handed Dean and me plates of beans and meat, which I assumed was Daryl's little squirrels. "Hendersonville, North Carolina." my quiet voice answered. Andrea gave a tender smile, "So how did you three end up in Georgia?" she questioned nonchalantly. "We were visiting a friend." My head dropped and I could tell the brother's relaxed mood had turned to one of grief. Andrea picked up on our reaction and quickly apologized. The group fell into a somber silence. The only noise was the crackling of the low fire and forks scraping against plates.

Dean broke the silence questioning the group about how they had found the quarry. I remained oblivious to the conversation and focused on the fire, eating my small meal. My mind was blank like a piece of paper. No thoughts or emotions. The feeling of someone watching me intently is what broke me from my trance of nothing. I turned around and met a powerful stare of ocean blue eyes. Daryl dropped his gaze quickly, but a second later looked back up. Our eyes locked once again.

Daryl was a good-looking guy. Okay, I'm lying. He was fucking gorgeous. Every part of him, starting with his light brown, dirty, and shaggy cut hair to his perfect ass, where that damn shop rag hung so teasingly. I had watched his body work as we hiked through the woods. His well-defined arms clutched tightly to the strap of his crossbow, exaggerating the curves of his muscles. His walk was that of a predator, silent and sure. I had no doubt in my mind that Daryl was an excellent hunter. The way he held his crossbow was of confidence and ability. But his eyes are what captured me. They were a bright blue that shined through his grime covered face. When he stared at you, you could feel those blue orbs burn into your body, and when you looked him in the eye it was as if he could read your mind.

Yet, looking into those bright eyes now I saw frustration and curiosity. I grinned slightly and turned away, breaking the contact. People have said that I'm really hard to read, and I guess Daryl is just learning that. I was pulled from my thoughts when Glenn spoke to me. "So Aria, what was your life like before the apocalypse?" It was such an innocent question. It was a way to escape the nightmare we lived every day. But my life was just one big nightmare, literally. "Simple you know. Nothing special just work and bills." _Lie. _My life was filled with adrenaline, pain, and death. It was the opposite of simple, it was complicated and brutal. "Now that can't be true," Dale chimed in, "What did you do for a living?" _I killed monsters and sent evil spirits back to Hell. _"Bartender." I lied. "Well that had to be an experience." Dale commented. _Sure was. _

"What about your family? Did you have any siblings? What did your parents do?" Glenn questioned. _I can't lie about them. They don't deserve that. _Why did people have to ask questions? More importantly why did people have to ask me questions? My life was a huge secret, and every time somebody asked about it, I got mad. People didn't understand and I could never explain and it was always so frustrating. "Look, I'm really not in the mood to talk about this. Thank you for dinner and I will see you all in the morning." I snapped. I stood up quickly and limped towards the tent. "Did I say something wrong?" Glenn asked. Sam and Dean shook their heads and watched me limp away. "She just doesn't like to talk about her past" Sam said solemnly. "Why? Did something happen to her?" Lori asked watching me. "Yeah." Dean replied simply, and that ended the discussion.

I was halfway to my tent when I felt that stare again. I stopped and turned to meet his stare with a mix of annoyance and anger. As I searched his curious blue orbs, I found them asking a question. _Who are you? _I shook my head sadly and continued limping away. I didn't even know the answer. I was so many things. I was a protector, a survivor, a sister, and a soldier. But I was also the opposite of all those. _Broken. _Yeah, I'm broken. Everything that made me who I am also destroyed me. I opened the tent and collapsed on the donated sleeping bag. I closed my eyes and hoped for sleep.

**Daryl's POV**

I tossed and turned in my sleep restlessly. Her gentle smiles invaded my mind. I could feel warmth spread through my stomach as the image of her standing in the forest flashed behind my closed eyes. Only her mystery eyes were lust-filled, and her silk chocolate locks tangled in my fingers as her lips pressed hungrily against my rough ones. Our tongues fighting for dominance, as moans, as gentle as a summer breeze, escaped her kiss swollen lips. By now my dick was rock hard, and aching for release. _God dammit. Your fine around all the other broads, but lose it over just one chick. _I groaned in annoyance. I just met the girl and she's all my mind could focus on. _You just need to get off and then you won't think about her. _I grabbed myself hard and pumped away, thinking about her lips wrapped around my length sucking and licking me into ecstasy. My warm seed spilled over my bare stomach, and I grunted heavily as I reached for an oil rag to clean myself up. _Happy now? _I always felt disgusted with myself when I jacked-off. Merle had caught me once and had bullied me for weeks calling me a pansy and saying that was the only action I would ever see because of my scars. I shoved the memory away forcefully and forced myself to fall asleep. Yet, every time my eyes closed I found her and the same question, _who are you?_


	8. Chapter 8

**Daryl's POV**

It had been three days since I brought the trio to camp. Three days that girl has plagued my mind. When I was in camp I would try to ignore her, but my eyes would always find their way back to her. I would leave to hunt the woods and she would invade my every thought. Then I would try to sleep and she would be there, her eyes glistening with secrets. She was driving me crazy.

It didn't help that she always caught me looking at her. She never got mad though. She would just look at me and smile sweetly and than return to whatever she was doing. She was stunning when she smiled; her face lighting up like a beacon in the dark. What I didn't understand was why she never got pissed that I was staring at her. Most people would be pissed, especially a girl, but not her. It seemed like she could read my mind, and knew that she was driving me insane. There were several times I would catch myself watching her and she would purposefully lean down a little lower to expose more cleavage, or she would pull her long hair up exposing her delicate neck that I wanted to kiss so madly. Those little gestures would force me deep into the woods for a much-needed release.

I had never had to get off so much in life till I met Aria. Everything about her was perfection. Perfect face, tits, and ass. Her body screamed fuck me. All the men in camp saw it too. I caught the Asian kid staring at her ass once or twice, hell, Shane was fucking Lori and he was blatantly devouring her when he thought nobody was looking. It pissed me off, which only made me confused. Why should I care if other men check her out? It's not like I was responsible for her in any way.

A growl made its way up my chest and into my throat. Why couldn't I get her out of my head? I yanked my arrow from the impaled squirrel roughly, and made my way back to camp. It wasn't just her body that made me mad, it was her in general. I had everyone else in this camp figured out, knew exactly what people were weak and those that were survivors. But Aria was another story. I knew she was a fighter. Her attack on Merle was proof enough. Yet, there was something else, almost like she was slowly falling apart.

I saw it the first night in camp. The way her eyes swam with emotion when she left the fire and the way her shoulders slumped in defeat. But the next day she was full of carefree smiles and gentle laughs. There was something inside of Aria that was beginning to eat away at her hard exterior.

As I strolled into camp my eyes immediately began searching for her. Her laugh dragged me to her, and I nearly tripped over myself. She was folding laundry with Andrea and Amy, her hands covering her mouth as the three of them giggled away. I'm pretty sure every guy in camp was staring now because she looked like the Queen's crowned jewels. Her chocolate waves pulled into an intricate braid, leaving her layered bangs to frame her glowing features. She had on an olive colored tank top with lace straps and lace trim that lined the V-neck cut; giving every guy a good look at her rack. Her jeans were tight fitting, outlining every curve of her round ass and toned thighs. I could feel the tightness in my pants. _Not here in front of everyone. Think dead puppies and kittens. _But it wasn't working as I watched a thin line of sweat slip down her neck and continue down between her breasts. _Dead bodies with maggot infested insides and walkers pulling out strings of gnarled organs. _My hard on disappearing instantly as I thought back to the first days of the outbreak.

I stormed off to my tent and gathered my supplies for gutting. _She'd never sleep with you anyway. You're just a piece white trash. You're scarred and ugly. She would never want to touch you. _I moaned in defeat. "Yeah, she does that to you." I looked up in surprise. Dean was standing beside me with a large bundle of wood in his arms. "Don't know what you're talking about," I grumbled as I began to skin the furry creatures. "She did the same thing to me seven years ago," his voice sympathetic. There was a silence that followed, Dean just stood there watching Aria with a look of love. Not couple's love, but family love. "She likes you Daryl," he said suddenly. My head shot up in disbelief. _No, a girl like that would never like a guy like me. _Dean didn't seem to notice, he was still watching her; a tender smile plastered on his usually stony face. "Take care of her," he said and walked off without another word. I watched him walk up to her and nudge her shoulder. She looked up at him with a rare smile. Sam and Dean were the only ones that could get her to smile that way. It was a wide smile, which made her eyes crinkle with joy and show off her perfectly aligned teeth.

A feeling of jealousy overcame me. I looked away from them and took out my frustrations on the little dead creatures. My head was a mess of emotions and thoughts. _Why did he tell me that? Was he lying? Why did I have to take care of her? What if she did like me? Should I try to talk to her? Why would a girl like her want me?_ My head began to throb from it all. I finished gutting and cleaning the animals, and spent the rest of my night in my tent, listening to Merle's stoned ass go on about some random shit.

I woke up the next morning with a headache. I rubbed my eyes tiredly, and tried to avoid thinking about anything. I wasn't going to think about her at all, clear mind. I pulled on my worn jeans, a sleeveless grey button up, and my boots. Merle was sprawled out snoring loudly, as I picked up my crossbow and left the tent. The sun had just climbed over the treetops and bathed the camp in a soft morning glow. Some of the survivors were already up, wandering around and doing daily chores as someone made breakfast. I started to make my way to the food when a small throat clear made me stop. I looked and found the one person I didn't want to see.

Aria stood there, her arms crossed over her chest. She was wearing a dark blue tank that was loose-fitting, her skin-tight jeans, and black combat boots. Her hair pulled up into a messy bun, clearing her face. I realized, for the first time, she had multiple piercings. Her ears were decorated with tiny studs. On her left she had three cartilage piercings, and her bottom lobe had two. Her right ear was similar, with one cartilage, and three on her bottom lobe. I also saw that she had a small tattoo of a dream catcher behind her right ear. _Wonder if she has others? _

"Are you ready to go?" she asked. _Ready to go? _My nose wrinkled in confusion, "What do you mean?" Her face was expressionless along with her green eyes. "Hunting," she answered simply. "You want to go hunting with me?" I asked. "I want to pull my weight around camp. I told you I know how to set snares, so while you hunt, I'll line the trail with traps." She spoke like everything was no big deal. That it was just natural for her to want to go into the woods and hunt for food. "What about your leg?" If she was going out there, she had to be able to run for when walkers came. "Good enough," she replied, but she saw the doubt in my eyes. "Trust me, I've had a lot worse. I'll be fine." I shrugged my shoulders, I could tell that no matter what I said she was going. "Fine, but it's not my job to watch out for you." Dean's words coming back to me. "Never said I needed a babysitter," she remarked as she walked past me and towards the woods.

The first thing I noticed was how quiet she was. Even with a slight limp in her step, they were as silent as mine. Neither of us spoke. I took point with her close behind. When I caught a squirrel or rabbit she would set up a trap. We worked like that for the first hour of our trip. I focused on the hunt and tried to not think about her. It worked for the most part. She was so quiet that I basically felt like I was alone.

Then my mind would wander to what she was thinking about, and the headache would return. I should have never let her come. I wasn't even supposed to think about her. Every time Aria would set a snare, my eyes would be glued to that body. Her fingers worked gracefully as she tied her knots. It was like watching a spider craft a web; skilled and beautiful.

Anyone could see that Aria loved the woods. Those gorgeous forest colored eyes would dance with serenity as she admired her surroundings. Even in the midst of the end of the world she was able to find peace here, like me. It didn't matter where in the world you were or what was happening the woods made me feel at home. By the way her shoulders relaxed in contentment I could tell she thought the same.

A light tap on my shoulder pulled me from my thoughts as Aria pointed up a tall oak tree. Perched on a slim branch was a squirrel. I grunted thanks as I aimed my crossbow and let the arrow fly; nailing the critter in the head. I was pissed that she had to point out a kill for me. I was an excellent hunter and didn't need any of her help. As I grabbed my kill and moved over to Aria my anger dissipated and replaced with curiosity. She was setting a spring snare trap. Her five-foot five-figure stretching up on her tip toes to pull a bendable branch down. The tank top she wore riding up revealing a flat tummy and some ink. The tattoo was a single dandelion with a section of the seeds being blown away. The floating seeds formed three names, Abby, Bailey, and Trey. _Could it be family? Friends? _

"Who are they?" I questioned her. Aria jumped slightly, and her face scrunched in confusion. "Your tattoo. Who are Abby, Bailey, and Trey?" The look of confusion on her face vanished with a blink of an eye and several emotions played out across her face before it went completely blank. There was shock, then pain, and then anger. Aria's relaxed body had become tense and when she spoke it was like ice. "Nobody," her voice showed anger, but her eyes showed a deep longing for something or someone in this case. "You don't just tattoo nobody's name for a tat so detailed like yours. Especially three nobody's." she was trying to scare me off. But I was tired of this mystery. I wanted answers and I was going to push her until she gave them to me. "Well guess what? I did." Aria began walking back towards the camp, her steps harsh and full of emotion. I trailed behind, "Was it friends?" I questioned, hoping to get a reaction from her that would give me an answer. But there was nothing. "Family?" her storming form stopped. _There we go. _"Three names so I'm assuming they were probably your siblings?" She turned quickly, facing me with fire in her eyes. "Congragufuckinglations Sherlock. You figured something out," her voice was filled with sarcasm and hate. "What happened?" She had only given me half of the story. She didn't have the Winchester's here to step up for her, when she didn't feel like answering. I needed answers. I had to figure out who she was. I didn't expect her to just give up the information, but I also didn't expect what happened next.

Her tiny body exploded in rage, she stormed up to me in just a few quick strides and got in my face, screaming, "What is it with you people? I don't ask about your lives! I don't ask you to spill your life story so that we can sit around and hold hands saying how sorry we are for each other. No, but all you fucking people do is ask me questions. I'm fucking sick of it! I don't need your fucking sympathy or gentle pats on the back," she stepped back, red in the face, and began shoving me hard, "I came out here to escape that shit! I thought since you didn't talk to them, then you would understand. But you're just like the rest of them." Aria had shoved me back against a tree. Her last words pissing me off, "Fuck you! You don't know shit about me!" I was nothing like those people in camp. She was wrong. "But you won't take no for a damn answer! Just like the rest of them!" She fired back, her hands were trembling in anger and I could tell that she was probably seconds away from decking me in the face, but it didn't matter.

I was about to retaliate when I heard the walker. I had my crossbow up and ready to fire, but Aria shoved it away and walked to the corpse growling 'mine'. She walked up to it and landed a vehement kick to the walker's chest; the force of it causing it to fall on its back. I expected her to jump on the body and stab it in the head, but to my surprise she walked over to its head and began stomping the corpse's face in till there was nothing left. I couldn't help but get extremely turned on watching her kill that walker. It was just so fucking hot watching a girl fight. When she was down her clothes and face were splattered with blood, but the rage that had filled her eyes was gone.

She walked up to me and began to speak in her usual breeze like voice, "I might not know who you are or what you have been through. But you don't talk to the other survivors and you distance yourself from them. You're hiding something just like me. So when I ask you to not question me about my past, respect it. I won't ask you, and you won't ask me. Deal?" I searched her eyes and found her pleading. Whatever it was, it haunted her. "Fine," I replied. She sighed in relief, "I'm sorry for what happened back there." Surprisingly I was too. Seeing how much it affected her made me feel like a total douche. "Shouldn't have pushed you like I did," I grumbled. Her lips curled up at the corners, as we made our way back. "So you were checking me out?" _Fuck. _I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks, as she watched me from the corner of her eye. A proud little smirk plastered on her face as she patted my shoulder, "It's okay Dixon," she picked up her pace so that I was following behind her, and called back, "I was checking you out too." I smiled. I was confused as all hell, but knowing what Dean said was true now, left me feeling like a stupid love-struck teenager the whole way back.

_*Please Review*_


	9. Chapter 9

****_*Thank you for following and the reviews. Just remember to let me know what you think about the story so far. This is my first time, so I appreciate every comment.*_

It had been a week since the group had taken the three of us in. My ankle was all healed now, and I could help the group out more. Every morning I would meet Daryl at his tent and we would go off to the forest. Our fight had set boundaries, but that didn't stop a friendship from forming. At first our conversations were awkward, but that quickly changed. We talked about the woods and the group. Daryl stayed true to our deal and never brought up any questions regarding the past. Although, the more we talked, I found myself telling him little stories. Nothing that ever revolved around 'them', but I told him about times with Sam and Dean. He even told me some of his own. It was enjoyable. Being with Daryl was relaxed.

I found myself smiling more. We flirted playfully and I was starting to really like Daryl. I knew that it was dangerous to let myself fall for somebody during these times, but I wanted it so badly. I remember a saying somebody once said, 'damaged people tend to gravitate to damaged people.' I don't know what happened to Daryl, but when he was around Merle he looked like a little kid trying not to anger his parents. He was trying to avoid Merle's harsh jabs. But I didn't care if Daryl was damaged goods; I had found somebody other than the Winchester's that made me happy.

I've only had a boyfriend or two. The longest relationship was about a year, and it ended because of that night. I mostly just had one night stands. It was easier. I had lost so much in my life, so I never allowed myself to build relationships. Being a hunter didn't allow them anyway. Relationships were weak spots. Demons would find them and use them against you. It didn't matter what you did, you could never protect them. So, I never bothered.

I had spent most of my life alone till I met the Winchester's. They gave me hope. I saw that I could have a family again. Sam and Dean had become my anchor. They kept me human, made me feel love again. Daryl was doing the same. He could be another reminder that life wasn't all death and pain.

When Daryl and I came out of the woods together, I would catch Sam or Dean smiling as they watched us talk and work. The three of us knew what loss was. We had experienced enough of it that we had become numb to everything. But every day that the three of us were together we were reminded that we could still feel. So, I didn't care if Daryl died in the next thirty minutes or days from now. I wanted to be selfish and let myself give into my emotions. I did the same for Sam and Dean when I met them, so why not do it for Daryl?

"You're quiet today," his southern voice pulling me from my thoughts. "Just thinking," I replied. "About what?" "Well, since you asked, I was thinking about burning your shop rag." Daryl looked back at me, confusion in his eyes, "Why would you want to do that?" My voice was playful as I said, "Because it's making me extremely jealous." Daryl scoffed, "Why would a rag make you jealous?" My eyes glued to the red cloth that hung securely from his back pocket, "It gets to touch your ass every day." Daryl never stopped walking as we talked; he just looked back at me, eyebrows raised in invitation, "You saying you want to touch my ass girl?" I couldn't help the little smile that came when I heard him use the nickname. "Maybe… would you let me Dixon?" my voice turning slightly seductive. "I don't know. That's my favorite rag. Kinda feels like I'm cheating on it if I let you." I shook my head enviously, "Lucky rag."

When we reached camp there was an air of uneasiness. Daryl noticed it too and I saw that he was searching for an explanation. I was about to go find Sam or Dean and ask, when Amy walked by. She radiated anxiety. "Amy, what's wrong?" I asked concerned. "Andrea went with a group to scavenge the city for supplies," her tone slightly angered. "I can't believe she left me," she mumbled to herself. I was shocked. I didn't even know this had been planned. "Who all went?" Daryl asked. Amy sighed sadly, "Glenn, Morales, T-Dog, Jacqui, and your brother." "Merle went?" he asked incredulously. One thing about Merle Dixon was that he never helped out. It was all about him. Everybody in this camp would have starved if it were up to him. But Daryl wouldn't let that happen so he hunted for everyone. Not just that, but Merle didn't get along with people, especially T-Dog and Morales. He was a racist. Which only meant that there was going to be problems on that trip.

Daryl was pissed. Amy had left, and he was pacing back and forth. I waited for him to talk. I know that he was worried. Everybody was. It wasn't easy to ask friends to risk their lives. You never knew what could happen on a run. You just had to wait for them to come back, and hope nobody died or got bit. Daryl finally stopped walking, pulled his string of squirrels off, and handed them to me. "I'm gonna go hunting and see if I can catch a deer. I saw some tracks earlier, but they were at least a day old," he started off towards his tent, "I'll be back in a day or two." He disappeared into his tent, gathered a small pack and then took off into the woods without another word. I would have offered to go, but this was Daryl's way of saying he can't sit around worrying about his brother. He needed some time alone. I respected that. If he wanted me to go with him, he would have waited impatiently for me to gather some supplies and then made some smart ass comment about me being slow.

I spent the rest of the day wandering around camp, helping whoever. Dean was busy helping Dale and Jim with the RV, and Sam was building a fence line around the camp made of tin cans. So, I helped Carol and Lori with the laundry and even joined in helping the kids study. It was nice to see the mothers keeping some sort of normalcy for them. I think it was a good reminder of what life was. It was also nice to work with Carl, Sophia, and Morales children. Kids were always my soft spot. They were pure and got to enjoy life for what it really was. I unconsciously rubbed my hand across the tattoo on my hip. _I miss you guys so badly. _

"Aria, will you play with us?" Carl asked. Sophia and the others were looking at me with eager faces. I looked at Carl's waiting face. He reminded me so much of _him, _the dark brown hair and freckles. I could never say 'no' to that face. "Okay," I answered with a simple smile. The kids erupted in cheers and all began to talk at once. We decided on playing tag and of course I was 'it'. They squealed with laughter as I chased them, always purposely missing them. I hadn't seen them this happy since I had arrived at camp. When we were finally done, they laid on ground, huffing and puffing as they caught their breaths. I stood looking down at them, my hands on my hips and a genuine smile on my sweat soaked face. I had just caught my breath when a set of muscular, sweaty arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me off the ground. I yelped in surprise as I was swung over Sam's shoulders. The kids were giggling and I couldn't help but join them. "Sam what are you doing?" But I didn't get an answer. He was whispering something to the kids, but I couldn't make it out. Then they started laughing and shouting 'yeah'. "What are you up to?" I questioned again. Some members of the group had stopped and were watching with smiles. Dean had stopped and was watching with a fat grin on his face. I mouthed, 'what is he up to', when Sam started walking. Dean only laughed at my question and joined the group of kids that followed behind Sam. I twist my body so I could see where Sam was taking me, but it was no good. The kids snickered the entire time. I ignored them, and looked around. Suddenly it hit me and I started kicking my legs wildly and shouting, "No Sam No!" I could feel him laugh as he tightened his hold on me. I was not going to let him throw me into the lake. No way. I started beating on his back, doing anything to make him stop. The kids began cheering as Sam climbed up on a few boulders. Sam pulled me from his shoulders, a wicked grin plastered on his face, as he cradled me in his large arms. "Sam, stop!" I called out. He ignored me and began counting down as he swung me back and forth. "One, two, three!" he exclaimed as he propelled me over the edge of the rock and down into the clear water.

When I came up, everyone was in a fit of laughter. I wanted payback. The boulder Sam was standing on was within my reach. I pulled myself up on it, and pulled him into the water. Dean and the kids only laughed harder, as Sam came up sputtering water with a look of shock on his face. I joined in with the others as Sam swam over and dunked me under. I lived for these moments. The pranks, the wrestling, and the teasing were my most treasured memories. I felt so blessed to have met the Winchester's and become their little sister.

The blaring noise of a car alarm had Sam and me darting out of the water, and chasing the rest of the group back up to the camp. When we got there Amy was screaming at Glenn, while Shane and Dale ripped out the wiring to the orange sports car. "Yes, yes they're fine!" He yelled, with a smile on his face. "What the hell were you thinking driving this up here like that?" Shane questioned angrily. Glenn's smile faltered, "Sorry...I got a cool car," he added sheepishly. Dean moaned slightly. I rubbed his back comfortingly. He missed the Impala. It was his baby, but it was also home.

A minute later a cube van pulled up. Andrea was the first one out and Amy sprinted towards her sister, embracing her tightly. Morales kids and wife flocked around him, all hugging and smiling. "What happened back there?" Shane questioned. "New guy got us out," Morales answered. He turned and called out towards the van, "New guy, come and meet everyone." The man had on a beige police uniform and was wearing a sheriff's hat. As he got closer he took the hat off to show a head of brown hair and blue eyes. I heard Lori gasp and saw the man get very emotional. "Dad?" Carl whispered. Then the little boy began to run towards the man, screaming the word. The man fell to his knees and wrapped Carl tightly in his arms. Lori was close behind, her hand over her mouth in shock. _Good for them. _It was nice to see a miracle happen for once.

I started looking around and realized that somebody was missing. "Where's Merle?" I asked. The group that made the run all looked at me with guilty eyes. None of them would meet my gaze. I shook my head sadly, my shoulders slumping. Those looks only meant one thing. "Daryl will be back in a day. I'll tell him," I said tired. This was going to kill Daryl. Merle may have been an ass to him, but it was the only family he had left. Glenn cleared his throat, and practically whispered, "We don't know if he's dead." My head shot up in disbelief. "What do you mean you don't know if he's dead?" The new guy spoke up, "Merle was a danger to everyone. I handcuffed him to the roof." I was pissed now. "You're telling me that you left a living person trapped on a roof to be eaten alive!" Even Dean and Sam were pissed. Our job was to save people. Merle may have been rude and crude, but he didn't deserve to die like an animal. T-Dog stepped in, "I dropped the key down a drain, and I tried to get him out. Before I left I chained the door with a padlock. Only a few geeks can push against it at once." "So you have no clue as to whether he's alive or not?" Sam asked. The group shook their heads. Dean scoffed, "Well good luck telling Daryl that." "Who's Daryl?" the new guy questioned. I locked my green eyes with his blue ones, "What's your name?" The man held my gaze as he answered, "Rick Grimes." I nodded, "Well Rick Grimes, Daryl is Merle Dixon's little brother, and he's probably going to try to kill you." My voice was calm. Rick looked concerned, "How can you be so sure he would try to kill me?" I turned and looked into his blue eyes again, "Because if I found the person that took away the last piece of family I had left, I would kill him." With that I turned and went to my tent, hoping that Merle Dixon was still alive for Daryl's sake.

The following morning was as usual. People were up doing their daily chores or finishing up breakfast. My stomach was in knots. Daryl was just like me and I know that as soon as he heard the news he was going to blow up. That's why I had to tell him. I could handle him and he wouldn't hurt me. If Rick or Shane or anybody else tried to tell him, he would lose all control and attack somebody. So instead of going around and helping everybody with chores or going off hunting, I waited in my tent. My plan was to get him alone, away from the group and break the news to him. I know that with this kind of pain it just feels good to punch something, and I didn't want that somebody to be one of the group.

I had dozed off at some point, and woke up to children's screams. I rushed out of the tent and towards the group that was making their way to the kids. When I reached the group of men, Dale had just decapitated a walker's head. I looked and saw that the walker had been munching on a deer. My heart stopped when I noticed that there were three arrows in the deer. _Oh shit. _The trees began to ruffle and we could hear the crunching of leaves and branches. Everyone aimed their weapon, ready to kill anything that came out. Daryl's dirt and sweat covered body exited the woods, a look of confusion on his face as he took in the armed people. Everyone sighed in relief, except me. I knew what was coming next and my plan was not working out well at all. "Aww man," he moaned out, "Been tracking that fucker for days." He walked up to the decapitated walker and began kicking it violently. "Filthy, disease-bearing, motherless, poxy, bastard!" "Hey calm down their son," Dale said soothingly. Daryl turned to him, getting in his face, "Why don't you take that stupid hat and go back to on golden pond." Dean chuckled under his breath, and some people gave him a look. I would have laughed too had I not been so nervous. Daryl went back to look at the deer, "What do you think? Think we could cut around this chewed up part here?" pointing to the gaping hole in the deer's belly. Shane laid his arms lazily on his shotgun around his shoulder, as he said, "I would not risk that." Daryl just shook his head angrily and began to walk off, when the head of the walker began snapping its rotting teeth. "Come on people, its gotta be the head," he commented as he sent an arrow into the walker's skull.

He pulled the fired arrow and made his way back to camp calling out for Merle. My heart plummeted to my feet; I didn't want to see the pain. "Daryl, I need to talk..." I began, but Shane cut me off. "Hey buddy we need to talk." _No, no, this was going to end so badly. _"Shane let me..." but Daryl's voice drowned me out, "What is it?" Shane looked Daryl in the eye and said, "It's about Merle." I could see his usual hardness crumple slightly. "He dead?" he questioned sadly. Shane rubbed the back of his head, "We don't know." Daryl's grief was immediately replaced with anger, "What do you mean you don't know? Either he is or he ain't." Rick stepped in quickly, "Look there is no easy way to say this..." "Who the hell are you?" Daryl questioned fiercely, cutting him off. "Rick Grimes." "You got something to say to me Rick Grimes?" his southern drawl was heavy as his emotions overtook him. Rick explained calmly, "Your brother was a danger to us all. I had to handcuff him so that he wouldn't hurt anybody." Daryl just paced back and forth furiously. He grabbed the string of squirrels and threw them at Rick, and then charged him with his hunting knife. Rick jumped back, and Shane tackled Daryl to the ground putting him in a choke hold. I was pissed. I had told them that I would handle this. On top of that, Daryl was my friend, and I did not like it when my friends or family were defenseless. I cocked my gun back and placed it against Shane's head. "Let him go," my voice numbingly cold. Rick pulled his gun and pointed it at me, and then Sam and Dean drew on Rick. "There is no need for this, let's just have a calm discussion," Rick tried to reason. "It would have been calm if you assholes had let me take care of it," I retorted. "Everything was fine till Daryl blew his top," Shane said, and Daryl squirmed in his hold. "I told you people yesterday that he was going to try to kill you. Would you have kept your cool if I told you I left your wife or kid on a roof defenseless?" I questioned Rick.

Rick lowered his weapon, "Shane let him go." Everybody's guns were tucked away as Daryl shoved Shane back and sat on the ground fuming. Shane backed away and stood next to Rick, eyeing me angrily. T-Dog stepped forward explaining, "I had the key and I dropped it." Daryl looked at him quizzically, "And you couldn't pick it up?" T-Dog replied sheepishly, "I dropped it down a drain." Daryl hung his head in defeat. I wanted to reach out to him, but I knew he wasn't the coddling type. "But before I left I chained the door with a padlock. The stairwell is narrow, so only a few geeks can pile up against it, not enough to break through it." Daryl's head was still hung and when he spoke his voice cracking with tears, "Just tell me where he's at so I can go get him." There was a quick moment of silence before Lori spoke, "He'll show you," she said, staring at her husband.


	10. Chapter 10

_*Thanks for following! I just wanted to say that don't be afraid to give me suggestions when you review. Thanks and as always please review*_

Rick, Daryl, Glenn, T-Dog, and Dean were going back into Atlanta to get Merle and the bag of guns Rick dropped. Sam and I offered to go too, but Shane said that he needed people here to defend the camp. Everybody was saying their goodbyes and wishing them group luck. Dean gave us his usual grin, "Now don't have too much fun without me." "You mean don't kill anybody while you're gone," I retorted. His smile brightened as he pulled me in for a tight hug, "Be careful," I whispered. He pulled away, our green eyes meeting, "Always." I hated it when we separated. I know Dean was capable of handling himself, but that didn't mean that I didn't want to be right by his side making sure of that. Dean turned to Sam and hugged him fiercely. No words were needed between the brothers. That hug said everything. When he pulled away from Sam he looked at the both of us, "Watch each other's backs." We nodded our heads, and Dean went to wait for the others by the truck.

I saw Daryl already standing there, and nobody had said anything to him. I walked up to him with a small grin, "So you're not gonna say goodbye or anything?" He seemed a bit startled that I even came to talk to him, and seemed to fumble over his words as he tried to make up an excuse. "I mean if you die out there than whom am I supposed to hunt with? More importantly who am I gonna flirt with?" His hard pressed lips formed a smile at my questions, "Only a Dixon can kill a Dixon," he replied. I gave a weak smile, but it wasn't true. Anybody could die at any moment no matter how invincible they thought they were. I pulled Daryl into a hug. I knew he didn't like physical contact, but I wanted to show him that I cared; that if he didn't come back, I would mourn him because I really did have feelings for this man. He flinched at the contact at first and then realized I wasn't going to hurt him, and surprisingly hugged me back. I stood on my tiptoes and whispered in his ear, "You better come back to me." He pulled back slightly to look at me, those gorgeous blue eyes burning into mine as he tried to see if I was telling the truth. I was. I had learned a long time ago that when you least expect it, people die on you. He needed to know how I felt because I couldn't live with myself knowing I never told him.

I reached up and gave him a gentle peck on his rough lips to assure him that what I said was true. Daryl was wide-eyed as I gave him a shy smile and walked away without another word. But I only got a step away before his calloused hands grabbed my arm and spun me into his hard body. His lips crashed into mine, as his hands cradled my face. My body sparked with fire as his tongue grazed my bottom lip. I parted my lips slightly and our tongues fought with desire. My hands had come up to his neck, while his moved down to my hips; pressing me against his toned body.

A loud throat clear broke the two of us apart, breathing heavily. I realized for the first time that everybody in camp had seen us. "Would you like to postpone this trip a bit? Give you lovebirds some..." I punched Dean hard in the shoulder, shutting him up. "Ow!" he yelped with a smile on his face. "Okay let's go!" Rick called out as Glenn, Dean, T-Dog and he got into the van. I looked back at Daryl, his smile wide with joy as blue eyes met green. "Should have been doing that instead of all that damn flirting," he said smugly. "Come back in one piece and see what all that flirting earned you," I replied, licking my lips seductively. He grinned excitedly and got into the cube van before Dean could start complaining. I stood rooted to my spot, watching the van drive away till it escaped my view and I could feel the worry of the two men that I loved.

"You really know how to make them swoon for you," Sam's teasing voice said as he came up next to me, watching the empty road. All I could do was smile in response. It was true. I could make any man fall for me, but this was different. When I kissed Daryl I felt safe for the first time in a really long time. It just felt...right; like it was natural for Daryl and me to be together. Trust me I know, everybody says that, but how else do you describe it? When I first met Sam and Dean, I couldn't help but feel like they were family. Maybe that was because I knew there Dad, but I think it was also that we had both lost our family's. That connection brought us together. Same with Daryl, I've only know him for a week or so, but I feel like I've been with him his whole life. There's just so much that we share in our lives that I don't ever have to explain myself to him. He understands and is just there for me.

After Rick and everybody left, I joined the women for laundry duty. I never liked laundry, even when there were washers and dryers, and I hated it even more so that it was all done by hand. But I had to pull my weight some way. Ed let us pile the baskets of laundry into the back of his truck, so that we didn't have to carry it all down ourselves. I despised the man. In the week that I had been in this camp, I had seen Carol with a bruised cheek and welts up and down her tiny arms. Everybody in camp noticed it, but never stepped in, which only pissed me off more. The first time I saw Carol with a mark on her, I practically stormed into her tent with my hunting knife. Sam had to drag me into the woods to cool me off before I could do something stupid. But not before I let out a slew degrading curses towards the abusive man.

When we reached the lake we could hear Shane and Carl shouting and playing in the water. "I'm beginning to question the division of labor here," Jacqui said watching the two. I gave a small snort in response. These women were stuck doing housewife duties because that's exactly what they were; housewives. They couldn't defend themselves and therefore got stuck doing the only other useful task. Now I'm a woman and trust me I agree that it wouldn't hurt the men to do some of the cooking and cleaning, but unless one of these ladies could defend this camp better than one of the men, I would just leave it up to them. Hell, I was a better fighter than all those guys combined and you didn't hear me bitching about their lack of help.

For the most part laundry duty was boring. There were a few comments thrown around about the odor of the clothes or the intense sun as it beat down on our backs. But then Carol started in, "I miss my Maytag," she said glumly. Then Jacqui joined in, "I miss my coffee maker. Mmm mmm mmm." "I miss texting," Amy said. Lori spoke dreamily, "I miss my bed." It was silent for a moment, and then Andrea piped up saying, "I miss my vibrator." We gasped in shock and then broke out laughing, as timid Carol practically whispered, "Me too," that only made us laugh louder and harder. "What's so funny here ladies?" Ed's voice questioned as he walked over to us. My skin actually began to crawl as he spoke. I watched him come closer, hovering over a nervous Carol, with immense hate. "Nothing Ed just enjoying some girl talk," Andrea replied nonchalantly. I never took my eyes off the man, as he snapped back, "You ladies should quite with all the bullshit talking and do your work." _Please God, if you even exist, give me a reason to beat the living shit out of this guy. _"Well, Ed, you could lift a finger and help us out, instead of sitting on your lazy ass all day." Andrea shot back.

"Well I ain't a bitch am I?" he snarled and grabbed Carol by the arm, hoisting her up and away from us. All the women jumped up and began to pull Carol away from Ed. I was standing right by Carol trying to wedge my body between her and her husband's rage. I could see the fire burning in his eyes and knew that he was seconds away from exploding, which only meant one thing; he was going to hit Carol. I saw him cock his arm back for a slap, and before he could hit crying Carol, I stepped in front of the blow. His hand connected with the right side of my cheek with a loud smack. I could immediately feel the sting of the skin on skin contact, and taste blood on my split lip. Everything stopped. There was no shouting or crying, just the impending silence.

It only lasted seconds before, Ed was on the ground, me on top and my fists drilling into his face. I could feel my knuckles splitting from the force, but that only made be beat the man harder. I felt his cheekbone fracture and his nose crumple as my fists pounded one after the other. I heard Carol's screamed and the other woman's, begging me to stop, but I ignored them. I wasn't going to let this man ever hurt his wife or daughter again. He was dangerous to all women and he needed to be taught a lesson. Blood spewed from Ed's shattered nose and busted lip as he pleaded for me to stop, but it fell on deaf ears. I was just about to drive my fist back into the man's face, when two sets of arms grabbed me. One grabbed my arms, while the other set wrapped around my waist and yanked me from Ed. "No I'm not finished with that piece of shit!" I yelled as they dragged me away.

"Aria! Stop!" Sam's voice bellowed from behind me as he struggled to hold my fighting body. I wasn't done though, I wanted to beat him until he was unconscious, and I could still hear that prick moaning in pain. Shane stepped in my line of vision then, "If you don't calm down then I'm gonna have to restrain you," his eyes shining with truth as his hand rested on the metal cuffs at his side. I glared at him with irritation but stopped struggling against Sam. Shane's face was neutral as he nodded and went to carry a battered Ed back to camp. Carol followed Shane, crying and telling Ed how sorry she was, as the other women stared at me with mixed emotions, some of shock, others scared. I understood, I mean I did just nearly kill a man with my own fists. Anybody would be a little wary.

The adrenaline was still hot in my veins as the women finished the bit of laundry and headed back for camp. I didn't join them, and instead picked a large boulder to rest on and calm myself. Sam didn't leave my side, so he sat beside me in silence as I inspected the damage on my knuckles. "Thought Dean said not to have too much fun without him," he commented staring out into the clear blue lake. I was silent in my reply. My split lip had already begun to scab and I could feel a slight tenderness on my cheek from the bruise that was coming up. "I won't apologize to anyone. Not Shane, Carol, Sophia, and especially not Ed," my voice stern. "Never said you had too A. I never even told you that you were wrong," his voice was soft as he spoke to me, his puppy dog eyes full of trust and love, "You were defending Carol and yourself. I don't see a reason to apologize." I nodded my head in understanding, staring out into the water.

We were silent for a while, both stuck in our own thoughts. "Sam?" "Yeah?" "I've changed," I said, my words carrying sadness. Sam's face contorted in confusion, "No you haven't. You're still Aria Redford, the fierce, bold, and short stump who kicks anybody's ass when they deserve it," he smiled gently. But he was wrong. I was different. I was more violent and less tolerating; I was turning into an emotionless hunter. "No Sam, I'm not," I said strongly, "Not after last year. I've changed and it's not for the better." I looked into his chocolate eyes, "Admit it. You've seen me change. What happened with Oriax...I'm different. I'm reckless and ten times more violent than I have ever been," I know Sam saw the fear in my eyes because he wrapped his arms around me a held me. "You're going to be fine A. I won't let you do anything that you will regret. I'll always look out for you. Always," his voice was soothing like a nighttime lullaby. I smiled into his broad chest. We used the word 'always' all the time because it was forever. We knew that there was never really an end for us. The brother's had both died at least twice and they came back. I almost died once had it not been for Cas's healing ability. The point was that a promise wasn't strong enough for us. Even in the afterlife we would still be watching over each other.

It was dark out and the group of survivors gathered around the campfire, eating fried fish thanks to Andrea and Amy. Rick and the guys still had yet to return and I was getting anxious. Something had gone wrong. Sam could feel my anxiety, "They are both fine A. It takes a lot more than a zombie to kill Dean. They probably ran into car problems," his voice was reassuring, but I heard his own worry. The group talked about little things, until there was a long silence. It wasn't uncomfortable, but at the same time it was. "Okay I got to ask man, what's up with the watch?" Morales questioned a thoughtful Dale. "What about it?" Dale asked with a smile. "I see you every day, at the same time, winding that thing, why?" "To keep time of course," he chuckled. "Why? It doesn't matter anymore," Amy said. Dale was thoughtful for a moment and then he said, "I give you the mausoleum of all hope and desire, which will fit your individual needs no better than it did mine or my father's before me, I give it to you not that you may remember time, but that you may forget it for a moment now and then and not spend all of your breath trying to conquer it." The group was silent, everybody thinking about Dale's words, trying to find their own meaning.

"William Faulkner," Sam stated with a content smile. Dale beamed like a proud grandfather, "Yes it is." I nudged Sam's shoulder as a 'good job'. He was like a book of knowledge. "You two are weird," Amy commented as she stood up. "Where are you going?" Andrea asked almost in a panic. "Bathroom. Geez, can anyone take a piss in private?" The group snickered at her comment, and fell back into light conversation. I rested my head on Sam's shoulder, feeling sleepiness overcome me as the light voices carried on and the fire bathed me in warmth. My eyelids had just closed when I heard Amy's shrill screams of horror. I looked up and saw the entire camp fall siege to the walkers. I grabbed my gun from my waistband and began to unload on any and every walker that came too close to Sam and me. People were running around in panic, falling prey to the walker's bites. Sophia and Carl were screaming, and I turned to see the two being chased by walkers. "Sam!" I called out, and pointed to the two children. He nodded, giving me permission to go and he'd watch my back. I took off at a full sprint, my knife and gun out and ready. I took out two of the undead with the gun before I was done, and then the rest with my hunting knife. "Carl! Sophia! Go!" I watched the kids run to their parents, tears streaming down their faces.

I checked for Sam, but didn't see his large figure. _Please be safe. _The walkers just kept coming as everybody made their way towards the RV. I plunged my knife into the head of every walker that I could face, blood spraying all over my body as I picked them off. I was up against a walker, my knife plummeting into his glazed over eye and squelching as it hit the brain, when one grabbed me from behind. I yelled in surprise and dropped my knife, as it forcefully yanked me back to its decaying mouth. _This is it. _But then I heard the most beautiful noise. The arrow sunk into the walker's head with gentle whizzes, and fell to the ground. I looked in the direction of the fired arrow to find Daryl Dixon running towards me, his blues eyes inflamed with distress. All the walkers were dead, and Rick's group came through the forest finishing any other walkers.

Daryl grabbed me roughly and quickly started running his hands up and down my arms searching for bites or scratches. "Are you okay?" his usual gruffness gone and total fear taking its place. "I'm fine," I said trying to reassure him, but he just kept searching. "Daryl!" I yelled grabbing his muscular arms and stopping their movements, "I am fine. No bites or scratches." His ocean eyes bore into mine, swimming in fear. "It was so close to you, I thought I was too late," he whispered, clutching me to him. I wrapped my arms around his waist, rubbing small circles into his lower back, trying to reassure him in some way other than words. His tense body began to relax as we held each other and he rested his chin on my head. "Aria?" Dean's panicked voice screamed out. I pulled away from Daryl and called back, "I'm fine!" Dean came to us, and wrapped me into a bear hug, lifting me off the ground slightly. A relieved sigh escaped me as I realized that Dean and Daryl had both made it back alive. Dean put me down and started looking around hurriedly. "Where's Sam?" I looked around panicked now. _Don't be dead, don't be dead. _"Sammy!" Dean called out, "Sam!" silence, and then the most comforting sound, "I'm here!" Sam came out from behind the RV, covered in blood.

Dean and Sam met halfway and gripped each other tightly. When the two finally tore apart, I grabbed Sam just as fiercely. "Don't ever do that again. I looked back and you were gone. I thought..." "Shhh, I'm okay shorty." I didn't realize that I had started to get all choked up when I was talking, but his stupid nickname made me smile. "Shut up Green Giant." He only chuckled and gave me one last squeeze before letting me go.


	11. Chapter 11

_*Sorry it took so long to update. As usual please review. I'm new to this and I appreciate all comments good or bad.*_**  
**

_Swing, swing, swing. _The pick axe connected with every person that died, and even the walker's for extra precaution. The air was somber as the group made piles of the dead. The Georgia sun beat down on us without a care in the world. Why should it? It's not like the end of the world has affected its life. It's funny really because in movies when somebody dies they always portray the funerals on a dark and gloomy day with rain pouring from the skies. But from my experiences, the sun is always out, smiling like it was happy that person you're burying died. I love Mother Nature, but she's got a sick sense of humor.

Andrea had been hunched over Amy since the last walker died. She won't eat, drink, sleep, or move. She just sits caressing Amy's bloodied face. Her tears had dried up a long time ago, now it was just a blank expression. Hearing Andrea's screams, begging Amy to come back, caused shivers to run through my body. I closed my eyes forcing the memories away. Why did it have to be her? Why did any of them have to die?

"How are you holding up?" I looked away from the sister's and into Dean's worried green eyes. I picked up my pick axe and with more force than necessary, slammed it into a dead man's head. When I looked back up from the mutilated corpse, Dean was watching me closely. "Good talk," he said with sarcasm. "Well I think Dale has some tea and you know I love to talk about my past so why don't we get our pajamas on and have a nice sit down," I remarked as I drove the pick axe through another skull. When I looked back at Dean, I gave him a tight smile, "I'm fine." I know it was hard for Dean to talk about his feelings, but I wasn't much better. Like Dean I kept things locked up. I know that he was looking out for me, but doesn't mean I was going to talk about it. "Okay," he replied, but I could see in his eyes that he knew I was lying, "Let me take over for a while," he said holding his hand out for the pick axe. I handed it to him, and went over to T-Dog, Daryl, and Sam. They were piling up the dead bodies for burning. I joined in with Sam, helping to carry whoever to their designated piles.

Dean saw my lie. I know he was worried and he had a right to be. I wasn't okay, I haven't been for a year now, not after the Leviathans or Crowley or Oriax. I tried to push it down, push all the hatred and memories down deep, but instead of going down they flooded up into the open. Memories that I had kept locked up for years were surfacing. I had become aggressive and lashed out at anybody. With the apocalypse it only got worse. _Accept it. He broke you. He won. _I wouldn't accept that. Oriax would never win, not after everything he did.

Sam's violent coughing broke me from my thoughts. His skin looked transparent, and he glistened in sweat. "Sam, you okay?" I questioned worried, as I let go of the arms of the body we were dragging and brought them to his head. His skin was like touching a hot frying pan. As I pulled my hand away, my heart stopped mid beat. _No, no, no. He was fine last night. _Without a word I began running my hands over his body, searching for any mark and hoping at the same time that I would not find one. I was pulling up his shirt sleeve when I saw it. I stopped breathing as I saw the angry, red teeth marks. The veins surrounding the bite were black with infection. My grip on his arm was like iron as I met those puppy dog, brown eyes. They were full of unshed tears and pain. "I'm sorry," he choked out, his voice thick with emotion. In that moment, Sam's knees gave out and we crumpled to the gravel covered ground together.

I pulled his large frame to me, holding on tightly as I ran my hand through his long brown locks. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," He mumbled into my shoulder as the sobs he had tried to hold back racked his body. "Sam?" Dean called out in panic. I never looked to see his worried body run over to us. I just pulled Sam closer, hoping that the tighter my hold then Death couldn't take him. _Please don't do this. Cas please don't let him die. We need your help. _I prayed and prayed until Dean was crouched beside us, trying to pry us apart to figure out what was wrong. _If not for me, then for Dean. He needs Sam. He's your friend, I'm your friend, damn it Sam's your friend! Help us! _"Aria what's wrong?" Dean questioned, Sam's sobs driving him to hysteria. I reluctantly pulled away from Sam and looked into his green eyes, my heart shattering as I watched him take in my expression. He looked to Sam then and down to his lap where his hands laid limply. Clear as a white cloud in a blue sky was the bite on Sam's forearm. Dean fell back on his butt in shock. I saw the same prayer to our friend run through his wide eyes.

Sam hadn't looked at Dean since he arrived, but seeing the two meet eye to eye, I realized that I was going to lose my family all over again. "Dean..." Sam choked out, but didn't get any further, as the sobbing took control. Dean was pulled out of his state of shock and wrapped his brother in his arms, "Shh, it's okay Sammy. You're going to be fine. We can fix this. We always do," But it was all lies. In the beginning we had tried every supernatural spell or supply to fix this disease. Nothing worked. The only person that could potentially fix this was MIA. The group had gathered around us, looks of disbelief and sorrow adorning their tired faces. The children were crying and some of the women. The men just looked lost. Everybody loved Sam; he was hard not to love. He was sincere, caring, funny, and friendly.

I looked at every face, taking in their reactions, when I finally met his stony face and blazing blue eyes. There was no sympathy or sorrow, just blank. But as our eyes met, I saw them soften just enough to let me know he was there. He knew I didn't need him to say all that bullshit people say when someone you love dies, I didn't need their hugs or their apologies. I needed him there for when I couldn't handle it. What I really needed, actually wanted, was for Sam to live and I wasn't going to get it. I tore my gaze away from Daryl and moved next to Dean. I slipped an arm around Dean's shoulders, and slipped my empty hand into Sam's hair. I ran my fingers up and up down through the brown thickness, trying to comfort him. His sobs had stopped and were replaced with heavy breathes. I rested my head against Sam's shoulder, listening to Dean mumble, "I'm so sorry Sammy. I should have been here. I should have been here to watch out for you. But I'm here now, and I'm gonna fix this." I nuzzled my head into Sam's neck as I listened to Dean. I wanted to believe so badly that we could save him, but we couldn't. I was going to lose another person I loved, my best friend, my brother. Sam's voice was hoarse and you could hear the silent tears as he spoke, "Dean, I'm sick. I'm going to die and there's no way I'm coming back," he pulled away from Dean and me, and looked us in the eye, "Just promise me you will do what you have to do," his voice hitching as he continued with tears streaming down his ghost white face, "I love you guys."

There was wetness on my chest and I realized that I was crying. Sam and I locked eyes and I could see the life in his brown orbs fading. I reached out and held his face in my hands, "I love you Sam. You're my best friend and the best big brother I could ever ask for." I gave him a trembling kiss on his forehead, and watched as Dean's floodgates crumbled. Sam fell forward, into Dean, and whispered, "It's gonna be okay big brother." I saw Sam give one last deep breath, and then nothing. His massive body went lifeless, those tender chocolate eyes closing forever. "Sam? Sammy?" Dean's broken voice called for his young brother, "No, no, come on," he shook Sam's dead body, "Sam! Sammy! Please!" Dean had completely broken down by now. His screams echoed through the silent camp, and the tears poured down his face in waves. He pulled Sam tighter to his body and looked up into the bright blue sky, "Cas please! Bring him back! God dammit I need you!" Dean was becoming hysterical. There was no way to bring Sam back. We had always been able to find a way back to each other, but now there was nothing. Sam was gone. Forever.

I moved next to Dean and pulled him into a tight embrace as he continued to hold Sam's body. I could feel my own tears staining my shirt and Dean's sweat-soaked one. He buried his face into Sam's neck and sobbed until there was nothing left. I just held him, waiting for the hardest moment. I never once looked up into the faces of the other survivors. I stared at the gravelled earth, as I heard the shot that ended Amy. I don't know how long it would take, but sooner or later, either Dean or I were going to have to put a bullet through Sam's head. "Dean?" my voice coming out as a shy whisper, "Do you want me to do it?" John had once told Dean that he might have to kill his brother, but Dean was alone then. I wasn't going to make him end his brother's life because I knew he couldn't. No matter what Sam turned into, it would always be little Sammy. It was quiet for a while before Dean finally spoke. His voice was void of emotion as he said, "No, I'll do it." "Okay," I said, and rubbed his back soothingly and waited with him till it was time.

I don't know how much time had passed. It felt like days, but was probably only an hour or so. I felt his body twitch before I heard the gentle moan. I pulled away from Dean and watched Sam lazily pull his arms up and grab onto Dean's shoulders. Dean was still buried in his brother's neck, and I was beginning to worry. "Dean?" He finally pulled away from the reanimated Sam and held his brother at arm's length. It wasn't Sam. It may have been his large body and long brown locks, but those wise, tender, and ever-understanding eyes, were clouded and empty. My silent tears began again as I heard Dean softly say, "Sammy." Sam was now more active, and began moaning loudly and struggling against Dean's hold. "I'm here Sam, I'm not gonna leave you. Not this time." With those words Dean let go of Sam, and I watched as Sam lunged and bit into Dean's shoulder. "NO!" I screamed and shot Sam in the head. His body fell to the ground lifeless, as Dean sat kneeling holding his bleeding shoulder. I fell next to him and began shaking him, "Why! Why did you do this to me?!" I screamed, tears falling violently down my face. "You were the only family I had left! The only one! And you just let go! You fucking asshole!" _This can't be happening. What did I do to deserve this? Why did everything I ever love die? _Dean's hands grabbed my face tenderly, his light green eyes filled with sorrow, "I couldn't leave him." "What about me Dean? I have no one now. No one," my words spoken with heaviness. Dean's hands were already beginning to burn with the fever, and his green eyes were pain filled, "You're stronger than Sam and me. Remember when I went to stop Lucifer and Michael? I went there to die with Sam, I can't live without him. That year he was in Hell, I was so lost Aria. I can't go through that again." "What makes you think I can do this again? I can't allow myself to get close to people because they die! My family, Bobby, Sam, and now you. Everyone I have ever felt something for has died Dean! I told myself I would never get close to people after my father, but then you and Sam showed up and I realized I could have a family again. That life was worth living. Now what is it worth?"

All those memories that I kept buried broke through to the surface. I was reliving the darkest moments of my life, and I could feel myself falling. I was quickly unraveling and I was terrified. It was all too much. When 'they' died it had been too much, so I turned off the switch. The switch that makes you feel emotion. I was scared of the person I had become during those years. I was emotionless. No care whatsoever. I did things that a normal human being would have a never done, but me, no. I had become the perfect soldier. Give an order and I obeyed. I had no sense of morals because I couldn't feel. I didn't want to become that again. Sam and Dean had pulled me from that dark pit and helped to turn that switch back on. But the gruesome memories, the pain and fear and torture were too much. My body ached in emotion and I couldn't stop it.

"Please Dean. I don't want to go back. I don't want to turn into that person again," I was sobbing uncontrollably now, my whole body trembling with grief. Dean slid his hands from my face to my shoulders and pulled me against him, as close as physically possible. "You won't A. You're not alone." "Yes I am Dean," I replied helplessly. "No you're not. You have Daryl. Let him in Aria. Don't give up on yourself." "No I don't. Nobody wants to be with someone this broken. Oriax is right, he won. I...I'm...I'm broken," I never wanted to admit it out loud, but I couldn't control myself. Dean pulled me away from his chest and gripped me tightly, his voice harsh but stern as he said, "No! Don't believe anything that demon said Aria. He doesn't know you. I do. You're not even close to being broken. You're a fighter A, so fight and survive." All I could do was nod my head stupidly as I looked into his fading green eyes. His grip loosened and his hands fell to his sides in defeat. Any emotion that was once in his eyes was gone and replaced by pure agony.

"Holy shit is this how Sam felt?" he mumbled to himself. I had to find something to distract my mind, to stop the constant replay of memories. "What's it like?" I practically whispered. Dean heaved a loud sigh, "I feel like my veins are on fire. My insides burn and I feel like everything is about to explode inside of me. My bones feel like glass, and I'm pretty sure that I'm starting to hallucinate," he said with a tired laugh. "How do you know that?" He sighed sadly, looking into my dark green eyes, "Because my mom and dad are standing behind you with Sam." I gave a sad smile, "You'll be home soon." Dean nodded slightly, but his gaze focused off in the distance.

I looked around camp, and saw all the survivors surrounded around the fire pit. There was some conversation, but for the most part they watched Dean and me. I met some of their gazes, but not long enough to see them try and send a message my way. I realized Daryl wasn't with the group, and I thought that he had run off to the woods. But when I looked around camp I saw him standing off to the side by the RV, watching me. His body was tense; his crossbow was hanging in both of his hands, ready for an attack. I wanted to look into his eyes, but I couldn't. I didn't deserve anybody's love because if I returned it they died. _Why am I so fucked up?_ I could feel his powerful stare, but I looked at the ground at his feet. They were shifting back and forth, as if he wanted to come closer but didn't know if it was right. I looked away from him, too tired to think about his actions, and looked back at my dying friend.

His breaths were shallow, almost like it was hard to breath and his eyelids drooped in agony. "Do you want me to stop it?" Dean looked up quickly and winced in pain at the action, "What are you talking about?" he asked confused. I pulled my sleek black gun from its spot in my waistband, "I can end it for you Dean. I can make the pain go away," my voice held no conviction. I didn't want to do it, but I didn't want Dean to suffer. His eyes were wide in disbelief as he looked at me, "I can't ask you to do that A." I closed my eyes in pain, "I'll do it," my voice finding some strength. The tears pooled in his eyes, but not over, "Please? I don't want to turn into one of them. Don't let me turn like Sam did." his voice cracked slightly. I nodded and tried to swallow around the lump in my throat, "Okay," I whispered. I reached out and hugged Dean greedily, knowing this was my last chance to hold him, "I will always love you Dean. I'll see you and Sam again one day." He tried to hug me back as tightly, but his body was weak, "I always loved you Aria. _We_ always loved you." My heart broke with those words. It didn't matter how far we were from each other that love would never go away. He pulled away a planted a desperate kiss on my forehead.

My lips were trembling and I shut my eyes tightly as I stood and held the gun in my hand. When I opened them I looked at Daryl. He was still standing in his same spot, but when I looked into his ocean blue eyes, he walked over slowly. His eyes never leaving mine, until he reached us. Daryl squatted down next to Dean and the two exchanged quiet words. When he stood, he looked at me once more, his expression blank; he gave me a gentle nod, and walked back to his spot by the back of the RV. I looked back at Dean, and forced a gentle smile, "Say hi to everyone for me, "I said. "Yeah," he was trying to be strong and make this easier for me, but when he spoke I could hear him breaking down once again. I checked the ammo on my gun, clicked the safety off, and looked back at Dean, "Ready?" I whispered. He reached up and intertwined my free hand with his, "Ready." I squeezed his hand as I brought the barrel to his head, "I'm sorry," I said and pulled the trigger.

I felt his hand slip through mine as he fell to the ground next to Sam. This was how they had wanted to go out; together. I wanted so badly to collapse on the ground and curl up into a ball between the two, begging for someone to bring them back, but I didn't. It hurt so badly. I had already had part of my soul ripped out once, and I could feel it happening all over again. I felt so empty. Rick and some of the others had come over to express their condolences, but it fell on deaf ears. I just stared at the two bodies that a few days ago were laughing and living life to its fullest. Now they were just dead. I realized Rick was still talking, "T-Dog and I will wrap them and take them with the others to have them buried..." "No" I said cutting Rick off. "What do you mean? We bury our own." I finally looked up from the brothers and into Rick's confused blue eyes, "I said no! What don't you fucking understand about that?!" I yelled vehemently. The entire group, including Rick took a step back from me. "Okay," Rick said calmly, "What would you like us to do?" "Nothing. I'll deal with it," my voice cold and dark. "Aria, I think you should..." "They are my family. I will give them the funeral they deserve," I said and began to walk off into the forest to gather wood for their pyre.

I heard some people calling my name, but I ignored them. Nobody bothered to follow, not after the attack last night. Nobody knew what was in the woods, but I didn't care. It would be nice to run into one those damn things. I was so angry and I wanted to kill something, but I scared off any critter with my vehement walk. It took me an hour to gather all the wood, but when I came back Daryl's truck was empty of bodies. _Guess they had the funeral while I was gone. _A few people stood up immediately when I stepped back into camp and came over to help carry the wood. "No." I said forcefully, and the group backed off. _How many times in my life had I built a pyre for a hunter's funeral? _Too many to count that was for sure. I had it built within another hour. I went into our tent, and grabbed their two sleeping bags. The belongings were not ours, anything memorable the brothers would have had were in those bags in the Impala. When I went over to the boys I pulled off their weapons, and gathered them in a small pile. I wrapped them up gently, and dragged each body by myself to the pyre. It wasn't easy, but I had to do it alone. When I had them both situated I went over to the group. "I know this is going to sound weird, but I need salt." Everyone looked at me confused, but eventually Dale said he had some in a cupboard in the RV. I went and got the salt with no explanation and dosed both bodies in it. I wanted them to be at peace. They deserved that after everything. I grabbed the gallon of gasoline and poured it over the wood. I pulled out the Zippo lighter the brother's had bought me three years ago.

We never really celebrated holidays, but we thought it was going to be the end of the world in a few weeks. So, we decided to have a Christmas. The boys knew that my lighters never worked when we had to salt and burn bones, so they went out and got me a customized Zippo. It was the best present in the world. It was chalky black and had the anti-possession symbol engraved in silver. I smiled at the memory as I lit it and brought it to the gasoline soaked wood. The flames engulfed the boys in a ring of fire, and I watched with a single tear slipping down my cheek.

_Always. _


	12. Chapter 12

****_*Hi again. I'm sorry that I had to kill Sam and Dean. Trust me it was a hard decision, but they aren't gone forever. After all this is a TWD/SPN Crossover. Enjoy and please review as always.*_

**Daryl's POV**

"I think we should take her weapons away," the old man said silently, "She just went through an extremely traumatic experience and I don't think she's in the right state of mind." I scoffed loudly at the statement and looked at the man, "If she wanted to kill herself she would have put the gun to her head after popping Dean off." "I agree with Daryl. Not that I don't agree with you too Dale. I think she's very emotional now, but she's also a great fighter from what I hear. We need all the people we can get to defend us," Rick stated matter-of-factly. I tuned the rest of their chatter out and looked over to Aria. The fire was still burning, but was near its end. She stood tall; her shoulders back and chin up as her empty eyes stared into the flames. Damn people didn't know what they were talking about. A weak woman wouldn't stand strong like that after everything she just went through. She wasn't going to just give up like that. Aria was a fighter that was for sure, and she would fight through this and survive. I was positive of that.

"Is the CDC is the best move Rick?" Shane questioned worriedly. "If the government has any form of stability left, it would be there," Rick replied strongly. Shane put his hands on his hips, looking unsure. "I don't know man. I still think Fort Benning is our best bet. Besides if the CDC is a bust, then we're stuck in the city." The cop had a point. The city was overrun; if this didn't work out in our favor then we were going to be screwed. "The CDC is going to have more information on what this is. Maybe even a cure." Rick defended. "There is no cure man, we need to focus on finding a safe place to stay and survive. Fort Benning is that place." Shane said aggravated. Both cops had a point. I sure as hell didn't like Grimes, but the man was right. We knew nothing about this thing. What is it they always say; you have to know your enemy to defeat it? The two cops stared each other down like dogs fighting over their territory when everyone turned in surprise at the empty voice. "There is no safe place left in this world. We will always be on the run. That's how you survive. So get the stupid idea out of your heads and think about the bigger picture," Aria spoke with no emotion, but her words cut like jagged glass. Everyone took her words in with a breath of despair. She was right. We thought this camp was safe and look what happened. We would always be running because that's how you survived.

I watched the green-eyed beauty as she said her piece and walked away. My stomach clenched tightly at the girl she was now. Those emerald orbs lost that mystery and became haunted. I wanted to go over and wrap her in my arms as tightly as I could. But I didn't. I hated myself for it. I knew she cared about me, and I'll admit maybe I actually wanted more than just a physical relationship. In the time that I had found her I had become to like our little talks in the woods. I felt safe around her. The others would judge me if I ever told them about my life, but she never did. We never talked much about our pasts, just a few things here and there, nothing big, but it was more than we ever said to strangers. But a girl like Aria didn't deserve a man like me. She was educated, and I was a dumb redneck that only knew how to survive in the woods.

"We leave tomorrow morning for the CDC, end of discussion. Pack all non-essentials tonight, so we can get an early start," Rick said strictly. The group nodded and went off to pack as the others made dinner. The atmosphere was heavy with grief and silence. Details of the plan were discussed at dinner, but otherwise it was quite. I looked for Aria as I sat down with my plate, but found her missing. She had gone to her tent after the brother's funeral and hasn't left since. The last I saw her was when she delivered the cold-hearted truth to the survivors. Again, I felt this need to go and bring her food, but I never acted on it. _What? You gonna go in there and hold her hands? Let her know that everything will be just peachy? Fucking pansy ass bitch is what you are. Getting all sensitive over some bitch. _That need was put out like water on a fire, and I looked away from her tent, forcing my mind to wonder about other things.

The morning light was shining through the mesh window of the tent. I threw my arm over my eyes in exasperation. I didn't sleep at all last night; my mind spinning around Merle and Aria. I crawled out of my sleeping bag and put on a new shirt. I could hear the others outside, breaking down their tents and packing their things into cars. I stepped out of my tent with my crossbow and bags, the air heavy with the Georgia heat. My gaze automatically went to the dark blue tent. Aria was in a light grey t-shirt that was slightly large, her hair up in a messy bun, exposing the dream catcher tattoo behind her ear. _I doubt that kept the nightmares away last night. _The bags under her vacant eyes were proof of that. Her shoulders were rigged as she tore the tent down. It wasn't in defense, but more of a ploy to keep people away. I couldn't blame her. Everyone had hovered over Andrea since Amy died, and they wanted to do that to Aria. The old man wasn't the only one that thought she needed twenty-four seven supervision. Rick and a few others thought it would be in her best interest, but anytime they got close to her, she would give a menacing look and they would scurry away.

I broke my tent down in about five minutes and carried all my gear to my truck. The group was gathered discussing the car situation, when Morales spoke up, "We're not going with you." "Why not?" Rick asked confused. "We have family in Alabama. We would like to try to regroup with them if we can," Morales explained. _Dumbass is gonna get him and his family killed. _"Are you sure about this?" Rick pressed, apparently thinking the same thing as me. "Yea we're sure," Morales's wife said and gripped her husband's hand tightly. Rick nodded solemnly, while everybody said their goodbyes. I just stood silently; my arms crossed over my chest, and nodded a farewell. After the goodbyes, everybody went to their cars. As I walked to my truck I saw Aria leaning against the passenger side door, her bags in the bed of the blue truck. I couldn't help but let my eyes wander over her small body. "Are you gonna let me in the truck or stare at me all day?" When I looked at her face, she had a small grin, but it only lasted long enough for me to see. I grunted in response and got into the driver's seat of the car. She followed and soon enough we were on the road.

The drive was uncomfortably silent. Aria sat lazily against the door, her head resting on her propped up arm as she stared soulless out the window. Usually I wouldn't have minded the quietness, but I realized I missed our constant flirting and bad jokes. I missed the mystery that was slowly driving me mad. That was all gone and replaced with a callous demeanor. That stupid part of me was nagging; telling me to talk to her, but I refused. What would I say? _Sorry for your lose. It'll get better._ Well it doesn't and she knows that. So words were no good. The silence was driving me crazy and my whirlwinds of thoughts were no help. I needed a few minutes away to figure things out.

It just so happened that the RV decided in that moment to crap out. Our caravan came to a halt and everybody got out and surrounded Jim and Dale as they opened up the hood. "What's wrong?" Rick asked. Dale pulled his head out of the opening and looked at Rick with that 'what do you think look', "It's the radiator hose again. The thing is more duct tape than hose. I'll see what I can do." Rick nodded and everybody began to mill around the cars. We were in the middle of the long highway, forest surrounding us on both sides. There were no other cars other than ours on the road. I decided to walk around and scope out the area. Aria didn't bother to get out of the car when we stopped, so it was the perfect moment to sort things out.

A half-hour into our stop and the coast had been clear, no walkers or anything else. Yet, as I was rounding the front of the RV I saw two men with large rifles and duffel bags coming out of the trees. Rick and Shane had also noticed and began to move towards the two men. I followed with, my crossbow up and armed. The two men noticed my weapon and the cop's and held their hands out as a sign of surrender. "Whoa guys! We're not here to hurt you. We haven't seen any other survivors for a few weeks," one said. I noticed Rick relax as he listened to the man. _Fucking moron cop, no wonder he got fucking shot. _Shane and I were still on guard, watching the two men closely. "Is it just the two of you?" Rick asked in his cop voice. The guy that looked younger than the one who first spoke, nodded his head, "Only us, been that way since the beginning of all this shit." I didn't like them and when I didn't like newcomers it was usually a good thing. These guys were dangerous. "How long have you been in the woods?" Shane asked. The men covered in dirt and grime. "At least a week, our car ran out of gas. We got chased into the woods by the dead and then got lost." "Glad to see you made it out alive. Now what is it that brought you to us?" Rick questioned. The two men looked at each other, silently communicating before they spoke, "We were wondering if you have any water to spare? The last creek we saw was three days ago, and we're down to one bottle between the two of us," the older of the two replied. I kept my mouth shut and let Rick and Shane decide, but something told me to just send these fuckers on their merry way and we get the hell out of here. Rick held up a finger, telling the guys to wait a moment, and pulled Shane and me aside. I kept my eyes on them as Rick questioned us. "What do you think? We could give them two bottles and that would leave us with more than enough," Rick explained. Shane was quiet for a moment, thinking about the right move, "Fine, but only two. If the CDC is a bust we need to make sure we have supplies to last us till Fort Benning." To my surprise Rick looked at me and asked, "What do you think Daryl?" I was stunned; I never thought this pig would actually care what I thought. I cleared my throat quickly, "Whatever gets them out of here. I don't trust them." Rick nodded and walked back to the two men, Shane and I right behind.

"We can spare two bottles. Nothing more," he explained, his fingers looped in his belt. The two stepped forward together, their hands outstretched to each cop, "Thanks. We truly appreciate it. My names Walt and this grunt over here is Roy," Walt said holding his hand out to Rick. The cop looked to Shane before both reached out and shook hands with the two men, "Not a problem," the cop said genuinely. Before the two could pull away, Walt and Roy simultaneously pulled the cops forward and spun them around, a knife to each man's throat and two guns trained on me. "Drop it now redneck," Roy commanded as Shane struggled in the man's grasp. I heard the group making their way towards us, as Carl yelled for Rick. _Shit. _Walt pulled the knife tighter against Rick's neck, and called out to the oncoming members, "Take another step and both these men will be dead!" The sound of running feet stopped and Walt looked back at me, "Lower your weapon or we'll start killing members of your group, starting with the kids." His gun moved slightly away from me and towards the group. "Fine!" These people may have not liked me, but I felt like I had to protect them. I slowly laid my crossbow on the ground by my feet, and took a few steps away. "We don't want to hurt you, but we will if you don't listen," Roy explained, tightening his hold around Shane. "What do you want?" Rick grumbled. "We want all the food and water you have. We also want ammo and a vehicle." I was boiling on the inside. No way in hell was I going to let these two shitheads take what they wanted.

I was about to speak up when I saw her. Aria was crouched low to the ground behind the two men. Before anybody in the group could answer them, she had two guns poised at the back of the men's heads. "Well it's my lucky day," she said her voice deadly. The men's faces dropped, and their skin turned a ghostly white, "No fucking way," Roy mumbled in disbelief, and tried to turn to look at her. Aria smashed her gun into Roy's head, causing him to stumble forward with Shane. "Let them go." The two men wasted no time in lowering their knives and letting the two cops free. I immediately stepped forward, picked my crossbow up, and aimed at Walt's head. Now that Shane and Rick were free they had their weapons out and were aimed at the two men. "Turn around," she commanded menacingly. Walt had a sly smile as he turned and faced Aria. "Well, if it ain't our little 'ol friend Aria," he said snidely. "You know these guys?" I asked incredulously. Aria ignored my question, and smiled viciously at the two men, "I'm surprised you two asshats are alive, but that just means I get to fulfill that nice little promise." Roy looked petrified, but Walt looked smug as he took in the cars and people, "Where is your little pets Aria? They dump your whore ass off on the road and drive off in that Impala?" I saw Aria's eyes harden and a cold shiver ran up my spine. Walt felt it too because that smug smile quickly vanished, and was replaced with terror.

"Dale, is the RV fixed?" Aria asked calmly, that savage look still in her green eyes. "Yeah, why?" he asked quizzically. Aria ignored the old man's question, "Rick take everybody and go back to the RV. Be ready to leave when I get back," her voice authoritative. "What do you plan on doing Aria?" Shane asked. But I already knew. She was going to kill these men, not just because of what they did here, no, they had a past with her and whatever they did, she wants them dead. "Go to the RV," her eyes fierce and words dripping with venom. I think some members of the group took a step back at her command, but Rick put his gun down and came next to Aria. "Do you want backup?" Silence was her response. Rick nodded and led the group back to the RV. It was just Aria, the men, and me. "Daryl, go back to the truck," she commanded, but I didn't move. I wasn't going to leave her alone with two men to kill. These men knew what they were doing and would be more than capable of overpowering her and killing her. I figured she would just let me go with her if I acted stubborn enough, but instead she screamed at me. "Go to the fucking truck NOW!" I was shocked, and so were the two men. Her eyes were wild green flames and her breathing was heavy. I scowled as I backed away from the trio.

When I got back to my truck I was pissed. I threw my crossbow into the cab and slid into the driver's seat, slamming the door roughly. She was being fucking stupid going out there on her own. About two minutes later, two gunshots went off; the sound echoing through the silent world. The anger I felt drained away and panic began to set in. _What if they both shot her? Or maybe she got one, but the other got her? _I hated this effect she was having on me. One minute I was ready to kill her and the next I was ready to jump off a cliff to save her ass. _Is Darylina falling for a girl? Awww isn't that just adorable. _I laid my head on the steering wheel; it was true, even though I would never admit it. Aria Redford was the only girl I had met that I didn't want to fuck and just leave. My head was still resting on the wheel, when the passenger door opened. That wild and untamed look in her eyes was gone and was once again dead. She didn't say anything as I watched her get comfortable in the seat and the rest of the cars began to move.

The silence that had accompanied us at the beginning of our drive was heavier now. I had so many questions for her, but again, I refused to open my stubborn mouth. "I'm not a killer." I almost missed the words they were so quiet. "Never said you were," I grumbled. I saw in the corner of my eye Aria close her eyes and sigh. She didn't continue and I figured she was done, but then she started more loudly, "They tried to kill the brother's and me a few years back. I told them they were dead, if I made it out alive." I didn't know what to say, but the reeling questions in my head finally stopped. It was like our time in the woods. I would get so irritated with the questions in my mind, and then she would just say something random about herself and the irritation melted away. It was like she knew what I was thinking, and right before I would explode she would answer them without me saying a word. The cab was silent once again, but now it was a peaceful quietness. The sun was low in the sky, as we neared Atlanta. I was on alert for any threats, when Aria spoke up again. "I'm sorry for yelling at you. I just wanted to do it on my own." I looked at her and her deep green eyes met my blue ones, "Its fine," I remarked. Other people would have thought I was still pissed at them despite the apology, but both of us knew that I had accepted hers.

We maneuvered through the cluttered roads and finally reached the CDC. The building was intact, but the ground surrounding it looked like a war zone. Rotting bodies littered the blood stained grass, as flies buzzed around their food. The group pulled over and began to gather outside the cars, weapons in hand and ready. Aria and I joined them quickly and we made our way to the doors. The place was deserted and the night sky was quickly approaching. _Fuck. _It was a dead-end as we reached the doors and that were sealed shut. Any hope left in this group died as Rick pounded into the metal doors. Aria was right. There was no safe haven and anybody who believed that was half-baked. I kicked myself mentally because I was stupid enough to hope for it. I just wanted one day where I could go about my business and not worry that some walker was going to take a bite out of me or some lunatic was going to shoot me for my food. "Rick, we need to go man!" Shane yelled at his partner, trying to pull him back from the doors. Lori was trying to reason with him, but he was insistent. He continued to yell at the doors, and the children started crying. Then all hell broke loose. Walkers began pouring into the field of rotting bodies. Anybody with a weapon began forming a protective ring around the women and children, popping off any walker close enough. Shane was still fighting with Rick, and more walkers were coming. _We're going to die. There's too many. _If we didn't leave right now, we stood no chance. I was about to grab Aria and make a run for the truck, leaving the others when the impossible happened. I heard the metallic rumble and then suddenly a bright light. _No fucking way._

**Aria's POV**

The light enveloped us like a blanket. It felt like walking on Heaven's doorsteps. Hell, I'm pretty sure it was God's voice that rang out through the stunned silence. "Get inside!" the voice yelled. Yeah, it had to be God. The doors had been sealed shut seconds ago. The CDC was empty of any life, except for us and the hungry monsters. No way could that be another human being, but then Rick and everybody began to move towards the immaculate light and unknown voice. I don't remember actually walking into the building, or the man saying that he would let us in. I just remember Daryl grabbing my arm, and dragging me towards the elevator, his and my bags in hand. _When did he get my bags from the truck?_ I slowly started to become aware of my surroundings and the events playing out around me. The mysterious man that opened the doors, was Dr. Edwin Jenner, the last man standing it seemed, as we gathered in the main computer lab.

"Where is everybody? The other doctors?" Rick inquired. "Gone, it's only me," replied Jenner with detached emotion. "Before you can get comfortable, you all agreed to a blood test. Please follow me," Jenner said after a moment of silence from the group.

We sat quietly in metal, lecture styled chairs, as one by one Jenner stuck a needle into each of us. As Andrea got up from the chair, she swayed a little before Jacqui grabbed her shoulders and steadied her. "What's wrong?" Jenner questioned with alarm. "She hasn't eaten in a few days. None of us have. It's not exactly a breakfast buffet out there," I replied sarcastically.

My stomach growled menacingly with my comment. For the past few days I didn't eat anything; the grief causing food to be the last thing on my mind. We were also low on supplies when we left. I ended up skipping the few meals on the road, so that Carl and Sophia could have some extra. Granted, it didn't help me in any way. My stomach cramped so tightly, it caused me to curl into myself. That was probably also because of the lack of water. "Well then, follow me," he replied with a tight grin.

About twenty minutes later, we were all gathered around a large metal table, shoveling steaming lumps of pasta into our hungry bellies. Jenner had been kind enough to open up the liquor cabinet to us. The group nursed on shared bottles of wine, whiles I however, had snagged an unopened bottle of Southern Comfort. I kept it hidden from the others, mainly because I was afraid they would try to take it away from me. I wanted to sink into oblivion, and I know that many of the members were worried about my state of mind. But, Sam and Dean were gone; Cas was MIA and not answering any of my prayers. Everything I loved had been taken from me. This was different from in the past, when one of the brothers had died. No angel, no demon, or any other supernatural force was going to bring my boys back. It was that night all those years ago again. I knew exactly what Andrea was feeling, as she sat at the corner of the table nursing her fifth glass of wine.

Everything I ever loved was gone. Not just that but the nightmares were coming back. The nightmares that I was able to keep at bay for over ten years. The nightmares of my family being slaughtered in front me, of me taking the life of the only father I had ever known. Watching Sam slowly die and turn into a Walker was like reliving the murder of my siblings. I was helpless, I couldn't save them, and I couldn't save Sam. On top of all that, ending Dean's misery was déjà vu from when I grabbed the kitchen knife from my stepfather's hand, and rammed it deep into his heart.

I was pulled out of my thoughts as a roar of laughter erupted from the survivors. Carl had a scrunched up face, and was making 'eww' noises, as Lori patted his shoulder and poured the contents of his glass into hers. I was basking in the carefree spirit of the group, when I locked eyes with a sea of blazing blue. Daryl's eyes had a slight drunken glaze to them, but there was that contagious air of peace and joy as he hollered 'booyah' to something Rick had said.

Daryl was the closest friend I had come to make within this dysfunctional group of survivors. I once was really girly when I was young, but growing up in the hunter lifestyle around guns, whiskey, and men, made me oblivious to the newest fashion trends and what color to paint my nails. My best friends became guys. My hobbies were guns and sports. I still acted like a lady, but only when it was needed; otherwise I swore like a sailor and drank like one too. I had to give up the feminine lifestyle for other hunters to respect me. I mean the majority gender of hunters was male, and they were quick to say that a woman wasn't capable of this job. Those men also learned real quick that I was more than capable and that unless they wanted a trip to the local hospital they better keep their traps shut.

Daryl and I were similar in many ways. Besides talking to Sam and Dean, I kept to myself. It was easier than facing the curious faces of the group, the questions of what life was like before this. The world hadn't changed much for me. I was still fighting for my life and doing my best to save this god forsaken world and everybody I knew kept dying. Secluding myself from the others made it easier to avoid the past. Sometimes, on rare occasions, I would tell a story about the Winchesters and me.

_The group was gathered around a petite fire. Everybody was quiet, stuck inside their own minds. Out of nowhere I started talking,_ _"The boys and I had just gotten back from a four-day hunt. We had picked up a case of beer, burgers, and some random movies the boys wanted to see." "Really? This story?" Dean asked in mocked boredom. Sam swatted his hand at him and I continued on, "The three of us crammed ourselves into this two person couch; me sandwiched in the middle, and started popping off beer caps. I had just taken a bite of my burger when the two started arguing about what movie to watch. I was like a ping-pong ball between the two. I saw the pie on the table, and just picked it up, turned towards Dean, and smashed it into his face." "Waste of pie," Dean grumbled, and the group laughed. I shook my head and started again, "Sam and I were keeled over laughing, and then Dean grabbed a fistful of dripping pie and slopped it on top of my head. I was so shocked," "Payback's a bitch," Sam said. I groaned, "Would you two let me tell the story without commentary?" Both brothers smiled at me, and I went on, "Next thing I know we're throwing, our burgers at each other. It became an all-out war, and the two of them seemed more intent on getting me then each other. When we were finally done, there was food everywhere. Somehow a tomato ended up in the bathroom shower. It was probably the best moment of my life." _

I had looked at Sam and Dean when I said that sentence. They both ended up wrapping me into a giant hug. My chest clenched tightly at the memory when Shane spoke up, "So when you gonna tell us what happened here doc?" Leave it to Shane to be the party pooper. "Shane, we are celebrating. Now is not the time," Rick replied with a tight voice. "Well this is why we came here right? To find answers? Instead we show up and find him?" The room was silent. The joyous atmosphere quickly destroyed and replaced with sorrow and tension. Jenner cleared his throat from the corner he was residing in. "When the outbreak got bad, people started leaving to be with their families. Others, well they...opted out. There was a rash amount of suicides." The air around us was heavy with thought. We had all considered it at one point or another. Just giving up, 'opting out' as Jenner called it. Yet, each one of us kept fighting. We all had a reason to keep fighting. Family, friends, promises, a will to survive that was ingrained into us since we were born, they were all reasons why we hadn't just put the gun to our head. _What's your reason?_ Huh, guess I don't have one. My family's dead, same as my friends, and my promises have been fulfilled. It's not that I want to die; it's just that I don't have the want to keep going. But I'm not a coward and I'm not going to end my life. No, if I'm going to die, it's going to be saving someone else's ass because they deserve to live.

"Way to be a buzzkill man," Glenn said his voice deep with sadness. There was another moment of quietness before Jenner spoke. "Well, if you're all done now, why don't I show you too your rooms," he said with a forced smile. Everyone got up eagerly, excited for a proper place to rest. I was the last to get up. Everyone had gathered their things and had followed Jenner. The room was empty, except for me. I pulled out my bottle of whiskey and twisted the cap off. _Make it all disappear. _With that I brought the bottle to my lips, and took a deep pull, then another, and another. By the time I got up to follow the group to the rooms, I had a good buzz. The world did a twirl as I stood up from my metal seat. Two more sips. It was like walking on a rocking boat, as I reached the door to enter the hallway. I leaned drunkenly against the wall, taking another few gulps of my poison. I had no idea how I was upright at this moment. The only thing going through my mind was that this was my escape. Another drink. I'm not really sure how much time had passed, since everyone had left, but I didn't think it had been more than an hour. My feet tripped over themselves as I walked down the calm hallway. Carol, Sophia, and Carl were walking to their rooms, smiles plastered on their clean faces. Rick was saying 'hi' to Dale as he headed towards his room. My mind was a burning fuzz, as I caught myself on the grey painted wall. Two more sips.

Dale had noticed my slumped figure leaning on the wall. "Aria? Are you okay? You don't look so good?" I looked into his fatherly brown eyes, and slurred, "Jus' peachy." I began to walk again, almost dropping my bottle. "I think you've had enough for tonight," Dale said, reaching for my bottle. I swung it out of his reach, and snarled, "I'm fine!" Rick and some of the others had heard me, and had come out of their rooms to see what was happening. "Aria, you're not thinking rationally right now. You just lost two very important people in your life, and you are a danger to yourself. Hand me the bottle, and let me help you," Dale pleaded. He tried to reach for the bottle again, and I blew up. "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME! I DON'T WANT YOUR FUCKING HELP!" Rick, Glenn, and T-Dog were now standing right next to Dale. "Hey, calm down. We are just trying to help you!" Glenn yelled. I don't know what happened next. All I saw was red. Something deep within me broke. I threw the clear bottle towards the men, and just as I was about to nail Rick in the face, a strong hand grabbed me mid punch. I went to turn and pounce on my intruder, but then two muscular, tanned arms wrapped themselves around my chest, pinning my arms, and began to drag me backwards. "LET ME GO! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU! LET ME GO DAMN IT!" I screamed, kicking my legs wildly in the air.

Just like that, those arms released me and I heard the bang of a door being closed. The rage was still coursing through me, so I turned and smashed my fist into the person who had grabbed me. I could hear the satisfying sound of my fist connecting with his right cheek. "Ow! What the fuck woman!" It was Daryl. Yet, that didn't stop me, my anger blinding me of any rational thought. Daryl was still cupping his cheek when I threw another punch at him. My fist connected with his gut, and I could feel the wind be knocked out of him. He gave a loud grunt, as he curled over. "FIGHT!" I hollered as I kicked him in the side. "I'm not gonna hit a woman," he grunted. This only peaked my fury, and I lashed out throwing punch after punch; my fist connecting wherever they could. I could feel my knuckles splitting, when suddenly Daryl grabbed both my wrists tightly and shoved me against the wall. My instinct was to kick out and catch him between the legs, but he placed his legs firmly in between mine, rendering me useless. "LET ME GO!" I screamed, the blind rage still pulsing strongly through my veins. Daryl's blue eyes peered into my dark ones, as he spoke. "Look I get it! You have all this anger inside of you, and no one to take it out on. I'm not gonna hit you cause I ain't that kind a man. But I'll sit here and take the beating if it makes you feel better."

The intense anger that had overcome me was beginning to subside as I continued to stare into an ocean of understanding. My rigid body began to slowly slump in his hold. Daryl noticed my sudden calmness, and wearily questioned, "If I let you go, you gonna start beatin' on me?" I let out a defeated sigh and shook my head. He released his hold on my wrists, and I could already feel bruises beginning to form. I absent mindedly began to rub at them. Daryl seemed to notice, and quickly stumbled over himself trying to apologize. "Stop, I'm fine. It's nothing compared to what I did to you," I bowed my head in shame, "I'm sorry I did that. Nobody deserved that, especially you." Daryl gave a slight grin, "Well, it's nice knowing I don't have look out for your crazy ass. I think you can take care of yourself." I gave a weak smile, and stumbled into the bathroom.

I grabbed a clean washcloth and soaked it in some cool water. As I walked back into the room Daryl gave me a look of confusion. "What are you doin'?" he asked puzzled. "Sit," I commanded with force. Without further questions, Daryl took a seat on the cot he had pulled out with a slight grunt of pain. "I'll tell you what, for a lil' woman like you, you sure pack a punch." I slurred out, "Did two tours in the military." I was getting ready to clean up his bloodied lip, when I noticed a bottle of Southern Comfort on the small table. I went to reach for it, but he snatched it from my grasp in seconds. "You've had enough. And you're not the one that just got the shit kicked outta him," he stated. I gave a slight humph, and started tending to his busted lip.

It was silent as I wiped the blood from his bruising face. He took a long swig of the brown liquor before asking, "What rank?" I chuckled slightly, "I was a combat medic. That's how I know to fight like that and clean you up." I had finished cleaning his face, and had set the rag aside. "Okay lift up your shirt." Daryl froze mid drink. "What? I need to check and make sure I didn't break any ribs." Daryl still didn't move. I rolled my eyes at his childish behavior, and reached to pull his shirt up. He grabbed my hands roughly and shoved them away. "No," he said with controlled hostility. "Why? Look, if you're shy that's fine. But honestly I've seen it all before. You've got nothing to hide," I said slightly annoyed. "I SAID NO! What don't you understand about that?" Daryl stood up, knocking me back slightly. He began pacing the room, taking a drink each time he passed me. His face was contorted in shame and anger, but mostly fears. "Daryl?" I began timidly. He stopped in his tracks and looked me dead in the eyes, blue fire meeting green. He was scared of what I was going to find underneath all that clothing. I looked deep into his blue soul and whispered, "I have scars too."


	13. Chapter 13

_*Just a warning there is some sex here. Also, this is the end of Season 1 TWD. I hope you all are enjoying the story. Please review.*_**  
**

**Daryl's POV**

"Daryl?" my pacing feet locked in place with that voice. The way my name fell from her light pink lips was like butter melting on a hot biscuit. When I looked up I was drowning in a dark abyss of green. Her eyes were full of understanding and again I felt that air of safety with her. Her voice was sad as she said, "I have scars too." My eyes never left hers as she slowly stood up and pulled her shirt off. I was in complete shock that she acted so boldly. I looked away from her eyes and took in her curvy body. Her breasts were perfectly rounded in her black bra, and her skin was a sultry golden color from the sun. My eyes traveled down to her right hip where her tattoo was. I got to really look at the inked art and in doing so I saw a paling scar that severed the dandelion stem. My eyes traveled back up her body and I saw what she meant. Her flat stomach was littered with them; most looked like knife wounds, while others looked like wild animal attacks. Some of the scars were just thin white lines, while others were slightly puckered and darker. Her gaze was burning into me, gauging my reaction. At first I was shocked. Never in my life, would I have thought a girl like Aria would have these kinds of scars or this many. When she said she had them, I assumed they were just basic things like surgery. I couldn't have been farther off. These were malicious. But when the shock wore off I was burning with lust. She was flawless, but more than that she was comfortable. She wasn't afraid of her scars or the memories they brought. Unlike me, who was too much of a coward to face the past. My scars disgusted me. They held me back from being the person I wanted to become because they always reminded of what I was supposed to be, a drunken and abusive Dixon.

_So then quit being such a fucking coward and get some. _For once, I just listened to myself. I closed the gap between us and smashed my lips to hers. It was pure desire and want as I slip my tongue into her mouth and undid her jeans. She moaned as I broke away and pushed the denim off. The sound drove me mad and I lifted her up and dropped us both on the cot. I kissed her hungrily as she quickly undid the buttons on my shirt, and ripped it off along with the discolored wife beater. I was oblivious to the fact that my scar ridden body was exposed to her. I lifted her up tight against my body undid her bra, and discarded it quickly exposing her rounded breast. I dipped down and swirled my tongue around her hardened nipple. She moaned breathlessly and thrust her hips up to mine. I trailed back up her chest kissing every inch of skin eagerly. Her hands slid down my chest, the silky softness causing shivers as she reached my belt. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly as I moved my mouth over the pulse of her neck and began sucking and biting at the skin. She ground her hips into mine, and I groaned in pleasure. Her hands wrapped around my lower back pulling me harder against. My erection pressed uncomfortably against the zipper of my jeans. I had to be inside her. I pulled away roughly and ripped my jeans and boxers off. I leaned down and pulled off her skimpy black underwear, and thrust into her. Her eyes shut and she gasped loudly as I began to move inside her. I grabbed her hips tightly, squeezing the flesh and held her body still as I pounded into her wildly. Her fingers dug into the flesh of my arms as she panted and moaned. I felt the fluttering in my stomach telling me I wasn't going to last. "Fuck...come for me girl," I growled. With that I could feel her walls clenching around me, and her back arch up as we both fell into ecstasy. She cried out as her orgasm took over, and I froze, deep within her, holding her hips to mine, as we rode them out together.

When I finished, I rolled on my back, leaving us side by side. Our breathing was labored and our bodies coated in sweat. "Well that was unexpected," Aria said breathlessly. I turned my head to look at her, and found a pleasant smile plastered on her glistening face. Her forests colored eyes were still glazed over with drunkenness and I could smell the sweet stench of whiskey on our breaths. I didn't say anything to her and instead took in every scar. I turned on my side, propping my head up on my arm, and began to trace over the delicate marks. Aria clenched her eyes shut, like she was remembering each one as I moved down her body. "How did you get these?" my southern voice heavy. Her muscles tensed at the question and I remembered the promise in the woods. I was sure that she was going to push me away and leave, but instead she grabbed my hand and rested it gently against the scar on her tattoo. "If I tell you, you have to tell me yours." I looked back at those gorgeous eyes once again finding that mystery that I obsessed over. She was willing to give up something from her past, as long as I did too. But did I really want her to know who I really was? What my life was like? I was afraid she would treat me differently or worse think I was worthless like Merle said I was.

I was lost in my thoughts when I felt her soft fingers begin to trace the largest scar on my chest. I stopped breathing and watched her reaction as she moved from scar to scar, but all I saw was thoughtfulness; no disgust or fear. "Okay," I breathed out. She pulled her hand away and once again placed it on top of mine, over the severed dandelion. "A year ago I got kidnapped. I was held captive along with another friend for six months. They wanted my friend to give them answers, but he refused. When he refused, they decided to find ways to make him help. They couldn't hurt him, so they decided that they would use me. My captors strung me up by my hands, and beat me. I told my friend, not to give in, but he did. The torture never stopped though. I didn't know the man, but he knew me and he wanted me to suffer. That's when I got these," she had been looking up at the ceiling, but now was staring down at her mangled skin.

"At first it was just a slice here or there, and then it became deep puncture wounds. They always made sure they weren't deep enough to hit any organs or cause me to bleed out, but on the last day, things changed. I don't know how, but my friend had managed to get help for us. When my captor found out, he stabbed me here," She said patting my hand above the dandelion tattoo. "'He said, 'Now you'll always have something to remind you of me.' Then they disappeared. By the time our rescue had shown up, I was practically dead from the amount of blood loss. I ended up in the hospital with five cracked ribs, a dislocated shoulder, contusions, internal bleeding, and a broken cheekbone. You should have seen the doctor's faces when I was rolled into the ER. They all stopped and asked if I was even alive before they went to work saving me."

When she finished she stared into my blue eyes, searching for a response. I admired her. None of the women I had ever met were like Aria. She was a fighter, one that would never give up. She'd seen more shit than anybody I ever knew. There were no words for what she had said, so instead I just traced my callous fingers over her scars. She wasn't mad at my response, actually she smiled. It was small, but it was the first one I had seen since Sam and Dean. "Okay Mr. Curiosity, your turn," she mocked. I lay on my back, my hands folded beneath my head. I was suddenly self-conscious and regretted agreeing to this. I had never spoken about my past before. It was just something I kept locked down and tried to never think about. But here I was thinking of my piss poor excuse of a father. I didn't even have to shut my eyes to see his drunken figure pinning me to the ground and beating me. I could still hear the belt buckle being unclasped, and pulled heatedly from its loops. My muscles coiled in fear at the memory and it suddenly became hard to breathe. I was about to lose it when I felt her smooth hands across my chest. All the fear drained away and I felt secure. The same feeling when we talked in the woods. She oozed with calmness and trust. My muscles soothed under her touch, as she patiently waited for me to speak. _You said you would, now do it. _"Look I've never talked about this before," I started shakily, "My old man used to beat the shit out of me. My mom died when I was young and I don't remember much about her. When Merle was old enough he would just leave for days, weeks even. When he turned eighteen he joined the military and that was it till a few years later. With Merle gone my pops started beating on me. He was an old drunk, who was always doped up on something. I learned after the first few beatings how to avoid future one, but I didn't get away from them all. He liked to use his belt as a punishment. Whipping till I was nothing more than flayed skin. If he didn't use the belt, then it was his fists or whatever was lying around. Man nearly killed me three times. Then Merle got back and I moved in with him," my voice was shaky as I finished quickly. I had kept my eyes closed the entire time, not wanting to see the emotions on her face. My body had grown tense again, but I felt lighter. I didn't feel so alone anymore.

As I opened my eyes I saw her hand hovering over the different marks on my body. Her green eyes focused on every scar. Her face was thoughtful as she examined each one. I was relaxed in the moment and my eyelids grew heavy, but I had one more question. "Are you ever going to tell me about 'them'?" Her hand stopped momentarily, but then she continued her trail. "One day." It was more than I ever expected. My eyes began to droop with sleep and the last thing I remember was wrapping my arm around Aria's shoulders before drifting off into a peaceful slumber.

**Aria's POV**

_"PLEASE, JUST STOP!" I screamed. His cackling laugh sent shivers down my spine. "DAD, PLEASE!" I begged. Then the screams began, shrill and panicked. Blonde hair soaked in blood, freckled skin smattered with red, dead eyes. "NO! NO! NO!" I cried in despair. Then the lifeless bodies stood, eyes black, and skin rotting. "Your fault, your fault Ari," the children chanted. "No, I tried. Please believe me I tried," I begged them. "Now you will suffer," the words unanimous as three knives were driven into my pinned body. _

I bolted upright in the dark room, my breath ragged and sweat soaking my shaking body. I wiped the wet hair away from my face and tried to take deep breaths. My hands were trembling violently and even with my eyes opened the dream played on repeat. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my shaking arms around them. I sat quivering on the small cot, waiting for my body to calm on its own. The air was silent except for Daryl's gentle snores. Half his face covered by the pillow, the light blanket low on his waist and twisted between his legs. He was on his side, one arm stretched out on my side, while the other hung loosely to the side. I stayed awake after Daryl passed out. He eventually turned his body and wrapped me in his arms, his leg laying over one of mine. It was amazing how much you learned about a person when they slept. You would never think with his tough exterior that deep down Daryl Dixon liked to cuddle. I couldn't help the wide smile that broke across my face in the dark. But it quickly disappeared as I realized I could never be with him.

I wasn't fit to love anyone. I was poisonous. The minute I opened my heart, they were snatched away. My dream, actually memories, began flooding back and a few tears slipped down my cheek. _Cas, if you can hear me, I really need your help. I just...I can't do this. Please._

My eyes were burning and I was shaking again. I tried to hold it together, but it was so fucking hard when there was no one to do it for. The group thought I was out of control and most of them were scared of me. The only one that didn't think I was broken I couldn't let myself get close too. _Which you fucked up last night. _I may have been wasted, but I still remembered every moment. I could feel the crack in my heart opening up again as heartbreak was slowly seeping in. Besides the brothers and Cas, I never had anyone that understood me. Then Daryl came along and everything changed. I wanted to be happy for just awhile longer. Was that so hard to ask for? But no, fate decided a long time ago that I was to spend the rest of my life alone.

My head was a hurricane of thoughts as I looked around the dark room. I found a clock on the wall, and read 8:50. I was sure people were already up and cooking breakfast. I decided to crawl out of the bed and take a long needed shower, hoping it would clear my mind. As I stood the world dipped a little and I had to grab the coffee table to steady myself. After the dizziness wore off, the headache came. It probably wouldn't have been that bad if it had not been for the dream and the damn tears. I ignored it and pulled my arms above my head and standing on my tip toes and stretching out my whole body. _Bad idea. _My body ached all over. I moved to the bathroom, stumbling slightly and turned the light on. I was shocked at what I saw in the mirror. If there was something worse than shit, then that was me. My hands covered in dried blood from my healing knuckles I split open last night. My arms dusted in light blue bruises, along with my hips. I had red bite marks all over my chest, and oh my god! That little shit. I had a massive hickey on my neck and a large bite mark to go with it. _Fucking animal. _My skin was sticky with sweat and dirt, and my eyes were red rimmed from crying. I moved to the shower, and turned the water all the way up to scalding hot.

I waited till steam was rising up and got under the water. It was like a well-deserved piece of chocolate cake, satisfying and wonderful. I just stood for a while, basking in the warmth. I finally grabbed the soap and began to scrub off the layers of grime caked on my skin. I grabbed the shampoo and squeezed half the bottle into my hand. I messaged the soap into my tangled hair, sighing contently in the feel of cleanliness. I rinsed and used the entire hotel style bottle of conditioner on my hair. I dragged my hands through my knotted hair, ripping apart any tangles till it was clear. When I finished I waited a little longer than necessary to get out of the shower. I wrapped myself up in a clean, white, fluffy towel and realized that all my clean clothes were in my bag. _Shit. _I didn't even know where my bag was. I remember Daryl having it, but I don't remember if he gave it to me. I decided to say fuck it, and I left the bathroom with my dirty clothes and fluffy white towel. I kept the lights off so that Daryl could sleep, but how was I supposed to find my bag in the dark? "By the desk," he grumbled sleepily. I jumped slightly at his voice and made my way towards the desk. I grabbed some random clothes and was making my way back to the bathroom, "Sorry if I woke you," I said quietly. "You don't have to change in the bathroom," he stated as I got closer to the door. I could see his sly smile, but still went to the bathroom. I could imagine the disappointed look on his face, and grinned. I set my clothes by the sink and began to remove my towel. I had left the door wide open and could hear the rustling of the blanket as he moved to get a better look. I dropped my towel and began drying my hair, giving him a perfect view of my round ass.

My eyes were closed as I shook the towel through my wet hair. I didn't expect Daryl to get up and come in the bathroom, but as I finished drying my hair, his rough hands grabbed me gently and pulled me to him. I knew that I shouldn't, but that moment couldn't have been more perfect. I leaned into his muscular body and laid my head against his chest. My eyes closed in content and I could feel all my worries and grief drain away. His thumbs were drawing circles against my hips hypnotically. Daryl leaned down and nuzzled my wet hair away from my neck, exposing the purple mark. I could feel his smile against my neck as he pressed his lips softly to the tender skin. "You don't play nice," I mumbled and I felt his chest vibrate with a laugh. I could feel him growing hard against my ass, and a shot of heat went straight between my legs. Daryl had begun a trail of kisses down my neck and collarbone when my stomach growled loudly. I sighed and pulled away from Daryl, "I need food." He was pouting as he said, "Now who doesn't play nice." I just shook my head and began to dress.

When I was done, Daryl was waiting at the door for me his head in his hands. "Hangover?" I questioned amusedly. He groaned slightly and we made our way down to the dining hall. The carefree spirit that I felt in the room was gone as I remembered why we were here. I couldn't accept the fact that my boys were dead. They never stayed dead, what would make them now? But all those other times we had messed with fate. They both should have died a long time ago and it finally caught up to them. I tried to shut out the pain and fake okay for the group. My outburst last night was sure to raise some worries and I didn't want to deal with it. We reached the dining hall and was welcomed with the mouthwatering smell of bacon and eggs. My stomach growled uncontrollably and I hurried to the food. I slopped a spoonful of eggs and two slices of bacon on my plate and grabbed a cup full of coffee. I could feel Daryl's eyes on my ass as he followed me back to the table with his plate. I glared at him, but only jokingly. He grinned stupidly and sat beside me. Glenn was moaning away in the seat across from me, as Jacqui tried to coax some food into him.

"So Glenn was the toilet your new best friend?" I asked teasingly. Sam and Dean never let me live down a drunken night, and I couldn't help but tease sweet Glenn. "Uh huh," he mumbled. I snorted a laugh and dug into my eggs, when suddenly somebody grabbed my arm. "What happened to you?" Shane asked forcefully. His grip was tight on my arm, but I was still able to yank it away. "Nothing," I hissed staring into his brown eyes. He looked from me to Daryl, who sat rigid in his seat beside me. "You do this to her Dixon? Did you hurt her?" Shane asked. His hands were on his hips and his foot was tapping against the ground impatiently, waiting for an answer. "Answer me you redneck douche bag." He moved to grab Daryl and I shoved Shane away. He stumbled back in shock and stared at me. I could feel Daryl towering over me as he stood behind me ready to beat Shane. "You want to know what happened so badly you shit face cop. Then I'll fucking tell you." I pointed at Dale, Glenn, T-Dog, and Rick and continued viciously, "Those four would have been unconscious and bleeding all over the hallway floor if Daryl hadn't stopped me. If he didn't grab me the way he did, then he would have a dozen broken ribs and a busted nose and be unconscious in his room and none of you assholes would give a fuck." I took a step towards Shane and saw Rick get up slightly to stop me from whatever he thought, but I ignored him and glared at Shane, "You're not my protector. If I need your help I'll ask, otherwise stay the fuck out of my business and his," I said pointing back at Daryl.

Jenner came in at that moment, stopping when he felt the electric tension in the air. "Am I interrupting?" he asked cautiously. I gave Shane one last glare and turned towards Jenner, "No." With that I went back to my seat and stared at my breakfast. It was uncomfortably quiet as Jenner made himself a cup of coffee and stood at the counter. I could feel Shane's eyes on me, but I never once met them. I stared at my plate no longer hungry and waited for the attention to fall on someone else. "Dr. Jenner I don't mean to pester you with a dozen questions this morning, but..." Dale said cutting the tension and ending the silence. Jenner cut him off, saying, "But you will anyway." "Do you have any idea what this thing is?" Andrea asked hopefully. She needed some type of closure for Amy so she could move on. Jenner set his coffee down and looked at us emotionless, "I'll show you." With that he led us out of the dining room and into the large computer lab.

Daryl stayed close to me, eyeing Shane from a distance. I could tell he was still pissed about the fight, but I had said my piece. Everybody knew better than to fuck with me, so I wasn't so worried. "Vi, turn the main screen on," Jenner commanded. We watched as the big screen lit up, showing a glowing blue brain. He zoned in on the picture and showed us the neurons, "It's the part that makes us human," he said awe in his voice. "So what about the walkers, are you saying they are still human?" Lori asked worried. "Vi, show them test subject nineteen," Jenner said, ignoring Lori. We watched test subject nineteen, and all I could do was imagine that virus pumping through Sam and Dean. Then the subject went still, a bright flash fluttering on the screen. "What happened?" Carl asked confused. "He shot his patient," Andrea replied with understanding. She took a deep breath and looked at Jenner with frustration, "You have no idea what this is, do you?" Jenner shook his head, "Could be bacterial, a fungus, maybe a virus," he said with no real interest. "The wrath of God," Jacqui stated. _Yeah, sure whatever, if only you people knew that God had left Heaven a long time ago. _

"Doctor, I've meant to ask you, but that clock. What happens when it gets to zero?" Everyone perked up waiting for the answer, and it seemed, for a moment, that Jenner wasn't going to answer. Then he said quickly, "The generators run out of fuel." With that Jenner made a hasty exit. No further explanation about what happens when they run out. The group began to panic slightly, as Rick questioned the computer, "Vi, what happens when the generators run out?" The computer voice boomed in the empty room, "When the generators run out, the facility will undergo a full decontamination." Rick, Shane, Glenn and T-dog ran towards the basement while everyone else began to head back to their rooms worried. I shook my head sadly; it seemed as though nobody understood what the computer has just said. Decontamination in the CDC means nothing lives. Didn't these people understand where we were staying? They held the most dangerous diseases here; things that could probably melt your flesh off in seconds. I guarantee they made this damn disease. I realized I was alone in the room, and I decided that I wasn't going to let all these people die because of some damn building.

I ran to each room, ignoring people's questions and looks and began grabbing bags. I threw the bags into a pile on the floor in the hallway, and by then the air had shut off. I ran to Daryl's room, opening the door at the same time he did. He stared at me confused, but I pushed past him, grabbed our bags and weapons and piled them with the rest. "What are you doing girl?" he asked puzzled. I ignored his question, grabbed the bottle of Southern Comfort, took a swig, and grabbed his arm dragging him to the computer room to warn the others. We arrived just as Rick and the others came back from the basement. Everybody swarmed Jenner, asking questions. He saw the bottle in my hands, snatched it up, took a long drink and handed it back. I could see in his eyes he was prepared for this. "Rick!" I called out, but he ignored me as he went up to Jenner. I was about to tell everyone we had to go, when the door leading out of the lab closed. "What the fuck?" Daryl questioned, worry seeping into his voice. I locked eyes with that sea of blue and shook my head. _We were trapped. _Daryl panicked at my reaction and starting banging on the door. He grabbed an axe and swung wildly at the thick door. Shane came up and shot at it, but nothing happened. Everyone was panicking except for Jim, Jacqui, Andrea, and me.

I tuned out the yelling and screaming and focused on Jenner. He had a reason to stay and fight this long. I may not have one, but I wasn't about to let all these people die without a fight. Rick had just pinned Shane to the ground, when I spoke up. "You made a promise didn't you?" The room fell deadly silent, as my voice carried throughout. I stared at Jenner as I came closer to him, never breaking contact. "That's why you didn't just run off like the others or put the gun to your head?" Jenner's voice was broken as he said, "My wife. She made me promise that I would look for a cure for as long as possible." "You fulfilled that promise didn't you?" Jenner nodded in response. "Your wife would be proud of you," I said earnestly and saw a single tear slide down his cheek. "I made a promise to two people very close to me. I promised that even though they were gone I would keep fighting. I promised not to give up." His were eyes full of sympathy as he listened. "All I'm asking of you Jenner is to open that door and let me fulfill that promise. I know it's bloody out there, but I'm not done fighting. Just give us a chance," I asked. We stared each other down, one set of eyes full of sympathy the other full of hope. "You better move fast. I can open the doors here, but like I said when you came in, those doors upstairs are sealed shut." "Thank you," I said and grabbed Lori, Carol, and the kids off the ground and pushed them towards the door.

I didn't stop to look back and see who stayed, I hollered for people to move. I grabbed my bag and moved up the stairs, two at a time. Daryl was right behind me, crossbow around his shoulders and axe in hand. We burst into the lobby and I tried all the doors, but nothing. T-Dog and Daryl were at the window trying everything they could, but not a single dent. _Cas, please I'm begging for a miracle here. _It might not have been Cas or maybe it was, but Carol stepped forward and handed Rick a hand grenade. Daryl tackled me to the ground, as the window shattered. He grabbed my arm and yanked me up and out the window with him. He swung the axe decapitating a walker and continued to drag me along the field. When we reached the truck he threw the door open, shoved me inside and jumped in on top me, covering my body with his. A second later the car shook with force, and the world exploded in heat.

My chest was pounding as Daryl slowly looked up and stared in amazement. I let out a whoosh of air, and relaxed. We were alive. My green eyes met Daryl's radiant blue ones and I found them a mess of emotion. He stayed on top me, green locked with blue, as we both said a silent 'thank you'. I licked my chapped lips, and saw his eyes leave mine and go to my wet lips. He wasted no time, connecting our mouths in a forceful kiss. It was pure want and relief, tongue and teeth. I heard the RV start-up and we sat up breathlessly. The truck rumbled to life and we followed the group back on the road. "Would you have stayed, if you didn't make the promise?" Daryl asked suddenly. I looked to him, but he kept his gaze on the road. A stubborn smile made its way to my lips, "I never made a promise Daryl." I saw his lips curve in a smile, and I stared out the window. It was just for a second, but I could have sworn I saw the Impala. When I looked back there was nothing. Daryl looked at me, his eyebrows furrowed in worry, "What's wrong?" he asked. I shook my head, "Nothing," I responded. But I couldn't shake the feeling away. It wasn't the car that had me turning for a second glimpse, but the people in the front seat. It wasn't possible, but I swore I saw Sam and Dean in that car. But then again anything is possible when it's the Winchesters.


	14. Chapter 14

***Hi, everybody. Sorry this took so long to post. I've been busy the past few weeks. Anyway, enjoy. Let me know what you think.***

I had no idea where we were going as Daryl and I followed the group to the outskirts of Atlanta. The streets cluttered with garbage and dilapidated buildings. Walls decorated in harsh writing. We pulled into a small alley, and everybody exited the cars. When I stepped out of the truck I and was met with an uneasy feeling. I grabbed my bag and pulled out an extra clip of ammo and the demon knife. There weren't just walkers out there, but other things. I hadn't run into any demons or other monsters, but I knew they hadn't disappeared. The only explanation I could think of for their lack of appearance was there were few living humans to possess or eat. _Maybe they'll all die off? _It would solve one of my many problems.

As I stood with the group the uneasiness grew. Glenn must have seen my discomfort because he came up to me explaining, "Don't worry. The place is rundown, but the people inside are good." I didn't respond because no amount of reassuring was going to make me feel better. We followed Rick and Shane through the maze of brick walls. I stayed in the back with T-Dog, full hunter mode on. We were inside an old building that looked like it had fallen down; the only thing left standing was the brick infrastructure with blown out windows. Rick led us through a large window and into an open courtyard. When I rounded the corner I was surprised to find several dead bodies. Walkers were quiet as they feasted on the dead humans, and we stood there in fear and shock. Glenn said that people were here, but from what I was seeing, those people had become dinner. The walkers picked up on the smell of fresh meat and began to stand, moving towards us. I pulled my gun out, and began firing as soon as Rick pulled the trigger on his Python. The gunshots echoed throughout the empty yard and I worried we were going to draw a horde to us. When all the walkers had bullets to the brain, Rick quickly went into the nearest building. At first it looked like we were inside an old car shop, but then we went through another set of doors and I realized we were inside a care center.

I could feel the group's fear as we stood in the hallway, the kids shaken up from the massacre outside. Sophia had begun to sob, and her gentle whimper was like a bull horn in the silence. Carol was trying to calm Sophia down, when Daryl turned around and snapped, "Shut that little girl up or I will." Carol's eyes widen at the sudden attack on her daughter. "Don't you talk to her like that!" she whispered threateningly at the hunter. I could see the shame in his eyes as he turned forward and began moving deeper into the building. I would have called him out on being an ass, but now wasn't the time for confrontation. I knew he was nervous about this whole situation, but it was wrong to lash out at Sophia. She's a little girl who's been forced into a brutal world. She has the right to cry at the horrors she just saw.

The mothers and children stayed back with T-Dog and Dale, as the rest of us followed Daryl down the hall. I was covering the back again scouring the area for threats, when I heard light whispering behind a door. _Why couldn't it be walkers? _I would rather deal with zombies than people. People were unpredictable, especially when it was the end of the world. I looked back to the group in front of me, but they disappeared. I couldn't leave the room without scoping it if we planned on staying here tonight. I took a deep breath and opened the door, my gun and knife ready. The room looked like a large office space. There were several desks lined up around the room, and papers were strewn all over. I cautiously made my way through the vast room, my heart beating with adrenaline. I was beginning to feel as though I had imagined the whispers when two forms appeared. "Aria Redford, it's a pleasure to meet you. Lots of talk about you in the pit," the dark-skinned one said. Then two sets of eyes went jet black. _Demons. _"You got to be fucking kidding me," I sighed. The two laughed and then began to advance on me. I went to reach for my holy water, but then remembered it was still in the Impala along with several other weapons. They had evil smiles and a wicked gleam in their black eyes. I backed away thinking of a way to kill these fuckers without alerting the others. I didn't want them to know about the supernatural. It was bad enough the dead was walking, they didn't need the extra worry of vampires and werewolves hunting them. All I had was the demon knife and there were two of them. I backed away until my back met with the wall. Their evil smiles grew wider, and the one with the ponytail licked his lips in delight. _Think, think, think. _Panic was surging through my veins, when a voice spoke. _"Exorcise them. It will distract them and then you can use the knife." _I knew it was only in my head because the demons seemed undisturbed. I didn't waste a minute and began to speak in hushed Latin. The words flew from my mouth effortlessly and the demons began to cringe as the spell worked. I moved swiftly, the words still coming and stabbed ponytail demon through the heart.

I was about to turn on the other one, but he tackled me to the ground. I grunted and stopped the incantation as I struggled with the large body on top of me. He pinned my arms down, knocking the knife loose from my hand. His weight on my chest was making it hard to breathe and I was gasping as I struggled to get loose. "Crowley told us the things he had planned for you. He wasn't very happy when you and that prophet escaped, made every demon look for you. Said one day you would be very valuable to him," his sick smile plastered on his face as he chuckled. "Fuck you," I gritted out and spit at the demon's face. That smile vanished as he decked me. The demon was about to hit me again when I heard the voices of the group coming down the hall. The demon eased his grip as he listened to the approaching people, and I used the distraction to push him off. I landed on top of him, grabbed the knife and drove it into his heart just as Rick and the others came through the door.

I sat staring at the man I had I killed. The hunter life hardened you. It didn't help that I had been in the military or what I had been through. Those experiences only made me tougher. I wish I was able to see these people as humans, but I couldn't. The people weren't bad; it was what possessed them that were. But seeing what those demons did and how cruel they could be you just forgot about the helpless person inside or at least I did. Taking a deep breath I stood, looking at the group. Their expressions were unreadable and nobody said a word. I didn't really care what they thought. I moved around them and left the room. I stood in the hallway away from the survivors as they regrouped and made plans for the night. They were scared of me. Everybody tip toed around me like I was ticking time bomb. One wrong move and I was going to beat them like Ed or Daryl, or attack them like I did Merle and Shane. It was so much easier when it was just the brothers and me. I never had to deal with this. They understood who I was. I sunk down the wall, my knees to my chest. I just wanted them back. I missed Dean's smart ass remarks, Sam's easy laugh, their teasing each other, and their comfort. Like the nudge of an elbow or a pat on the head, or those giant, lung crushing hugs. Dean said I was strong enough to do this on my own, but I'm not. Not without turning into a monster myself. _'You're not alone, you have Daryl.' _He was wrong. What happened at the CDC was just grief and rage, pent-up emotion that needed to be released. But the storytelling and scar tracing was something different.

I leaned my head against the wall; my eyes closed and a frustrated sigh escaping my lips. I know that the CDC was more than just sex. I know because for the first time since meeting him, he was gentle. He didn't just dress the next morning and leave. No, he got up and held me, protected me from the blast. The survivors were starting to move again. I stood and followed them to wherever. We passed the office room, and I remembered the voice that saved me. It was strange. I knew the voice too. I thought about it as we marched up the stairs and into the nearest room. As I crossed the threshold, I recognized the voice. _Sam. _My stomach churned violently at the discovery and I bolted out of the room, down the hall. When I was far away from the room, I leaned against the wall and heaved. _How is that possible? No, you're just imagining it. He's dead. It was probably just a memory. _I was shaking as I finished expelling my stomach contents. _What if they didn't move on? What if they stayed behind and are stuck here as ghosts? _

My mind was racing and I didn't notice the figure standing a few feet from me. "Are you okay?" I jumped slightly at the voice, shocked that it was Rick. "Yea, you know you can only smell so much rotting flesh before it gets to you," I tried weakly, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. Rick smiled politely, but we both knew it was bullshit. We stood awkwardly, no words exchanged. I was about to leave and go back to the room when he spoke up. "Aria, I just wanted to thank you for what you did back at the CDC and what you did today." I looked into his blue eyes as they burned with sincerity. I took his words in slowly. It was nice to be thanked for once. "It's what I do. I wasn't going to let some crazy nut job blow us up when there is still a chance," He shifted back and forth, looking up and down, "Everybody blames me for what happened at the CDC. I think they don't believe I can keep them safe," he said uneasily, "Maybe I can't," he said more to himself. I moved next to the cop, resting a hand on his shoulder, "You did what you thought was right. So, your plan backfired. It happens to everybody Rick. Point is I know you can keep this group safe. If they don't have faith in you, then know I do." Rick stood quietly as I finished. His blue eyes locked with mine, as he gave a half smile, "Thanks." I just shrugged my shoulders and made my way back down the hall.

I didn't bother going back into the room. I went to the stairwell, deciding to take watch and just be alone, but instead I found Daryl. He looked up as I approached but went back to staring down the dark stairwell. I didn't say anything either as I took a spot on the hard linoleum floor. We sat in silence and I rested my head on the wall, my eyes closed, and hand on my knife. The lantern's light danced across my closed eyelids and I could feel sleep trying to pull me under. "Go get some rest," his gruff voice echoed. I didn't bother opening my eyes as I responded, "Can't." His eyes burned into me as he asked stubbornly, "Why?" I sighed, opening my eyes to meet his blue stare. "Because of the nightmares I have." He turned away at my response and stared back into the dark. It was the truth. Ever since Sam and Dean had passed, the nightmares of that torturous night were invading my sleep. It took me two years to get them to go away. Now they were back and more vicious than before. I was afraid of what I would find every time I closed my eyes.

The air was heavy with silence and the time passed uneventfully. My eyes were heavy and my mind begged for sleep, but I refused. I didn't want to see it all happen again. I could hear heavy footsteps from the hallway and I tensed. When Shane came into view, my body eased. His gaze flickered between Daryl and I before he spoke. "Shift's up." Daryl stood from the stairs and stretched, nodding his head at Shane before looking at me. "You can't hide from them. You're gonna need sleep eventually, and you're a liability if you're half-awake trying to fight," his voice gruff as he spoke. I just shrugged my shoulders, and he left without another word. His jaw clenched tight as he left the stairwell and I knew he was pissed at me. Shane stood by the edge of the stairs, shotgun hanging lazily from his hand. He cocked his head at me, studying. "Why does Daryl think you're a liability?" eyeing me with suspicion. I just stared at the shadows cast by the lantern, "None of your business," I said nonchalantly. I didn't have to look at Shane to know he was pissed with my response. "Bullshit. If you're a risk to this group then I need to know," he said harshly. _Why did Shane have to take this shift? _I was tired and didn't want to deal with this asshole. I didn't think Shane was a bad guy when I first met him, but once Rick showed up he changed. I don't think the others noticed, but it seemed to me he was becoming a liability with his hot headedness. I looked at him with an annoyed frown, "Why? I already told you I can take care of myself, cop. I think the two dead guys downstairs are proof enough." Those brown eyes narrowed to slits as he stared me down. "You're just a crazy bitch. I saw the way you attacked Merle and Ed and the way you slaughtered the walkers at the camp. You're a cold hearted killer. A danger to us all," Shane moved from the stairs so that he was crouched in front of me, "Somebody needs to control your psycho little self, somebody who knows how to control bad people." My green eyes were narrowed with hate. Shane grabbed my thigh roughly and I immediately pulled away. His face contorted in a sly smirk, a glint of want and control in his eyes. "I don't know what you see in that piece of trash hillbilly..." he said lowly, his words trailing off as his eyes wandered down my body. My skin crawled while my heart was pumping in fear. I knew I should shove him away, but my damn pride wouldn't give him the satisfaction. He leaned in and whispered into my ear, "Dixon can't control you. You need a master like the wild dog you are," his hand trailed up my thigh again as he said, "I can be that for you."

My stomach rolled uneasily as I shoved him away and left the room. I could feel the bile in my throat and my skin crawling with disgust. I didn't go to the room with the others instead I walked down the long hallway, stopping when I began to hyperventilate. I slid down the white wall and tried to calm my breathing, but the memories were flooding.

_ The knife slid teasingly down my exposed stomach. "My little pet," he purred into my ear. "I've waited so long to have this moment with you." I was trembling and hoped my voice wouldn't, "Fuck you, Oriax." He chuckled wickedly, the knife now trailing over the tops of my breasts. "It's a shame I didn't get to do this with your daddy dearest's face. It would have been more enjoyable to see the horrors on your face as your father touched you." His voice reminded me of a slithering snake as his other hand slid up my leg, weaving between and in between my legs before ending on my ass. My body trembled at the touch, my skin crawling with distaste, my stomach barely holding its contents down. "Now pet, do as I say and beg," he commanded as the blade sunk into me. _

I rocked back and forth, curled in on myself as the memory played out in my mind. I tried closing my eyes and forcing the images away, but I could still feel his hands, the knife, and his vile words. If it wasn't that abomination then it was Shane's face, his hands, and his words. The tears slipped down my cheeks before I could stop them. _You're broken, a wild animal with no purpose. You can't save anybody. All you do is fail and fail. _The voices taunted me, and the tears came harder. I prayed for Sam and Dean. I begged God and Cas to bring them back. I prayed to whoever could hear my cries. All I wanted was the pain to go away. I needed it to all vanish, but nobody could help me. I sat curled up on the floor, my pain silent as the tears slowly pulled me into a restless sleep.

The hands were rough as they shook me kindly. "Hey, get up," his southern voice commanded. My eyes slowly opened, and I saw Daryl squatted next to me, his face set in his usual scowl. My head ached dully and I could feel the puffiness in my tired eyes. I sat up slowly from my prone position on the floor and rubbed my aching temples. My back was stiff from the hard ground and I knew my face looked like shit. Daryl was quiet as I stood up and followed him to the rest of the group. I kept my head down, avoiding the wandering eyes of the group. I didn't want them to see my tear streaked face. We discussed siphoning whatever gas from Daryl's truck and Shane's Jeep to use for the other vehicles. I watched Daryl grab his belongings and strap them to Merle's bike. The Grimes family, Carol and Sophia piled into Carol's station wagon, while everybody else jumped into the RV. I could feel Shane's eyes on me as he entered the RV and I refused to sit for however many miles in that car with him after last night. I walked over to Daryl as he finished tying his things down, "Do you mind if I ride with you?" my voice shy. He looked to the RV and the station wagon, debating. When he met my green eyes, whatever answer he was going to give disappeared. His hard eyes softened a bit, but his grimace remained. "Fine," he grumbled. "Thanks," I replied numbly and strapped my bag down quickly.

As I got on the bike, I could feel Daryl's muscles tighten, and I remembered what he told me. I was cautious as I slowly wrapped my arms around his torso. He started the engine and the bike roared to life. He was still tense as we started driving, but I rested my head between his shoulder blades and the tension eased away. We were the same in so many ways. Neither of us would admit to what happened at the CDC being more than a drunken night. We would never admit our feelings because we both had reasons we couldn't. But despite all that, we still craved each other's comfort. Whether we wanted to admit it or not we were safe with each other, safe from judgment. I relished in the moment closing my eyes, letting my messy hair blow in the wind carelessly and letting all my cares fly away in the passing wind. In this moment I could be free of it all.

We drove on the open highway for at least two hours before coming upon a traffic jam. Daryl weaved carefully between the stopped vehicles, searching for a way through. I took in the grime covered cars, packed full of luggage and supplies. Poor people didn't even stand a chance out here. Rotting bodies sat lifeless in the hot cars, the smell wafting out of the open windows and into the hot Georgia air. We weaved slowly between the masses of cars, the RV following cautiously behind. The abandoned vehicles were bumper to bumper on the highway making it difficult to maneuver for the larger cars. The world was silent in remembrance of the dead, when a loud pop and whine echoed out. I looked back to the cars behind us, and found the RV smoking heavily. I tapped Daryl on the shoulder, and he looked to where I pointed. He turned the bike around and met back with the group as Dale exited the RV with a frustrated scowl. The survivors looked weary and defeated as they gathered around the smoking hood of the large vehicle. "I told you I needed that new hose. She won't get any farther if I don't replace it," Dale commented, fiddling around the inside of the RV. "Well, we got plenty of choices here, why don't we all split up and look for supplies," Rick suggested. Nobody commented and all went off to scavenge the abandoned cars for anything useful. I could feel Shane's hungry gaze, as everyone went off. My skin broke out in bumps and I kept my head low as I walked far away from him.

He wouldn't stop watching me since last night. He saw how weak I was, and now he was using it to his advantage. If the damn memories would go away I could handle him no problem. Yet, when I felt those yearning eyes on me I couldn't help but shut down. The memories would flood back and I was vulnerable. My box of terrible thoughts was unleashed and I couldn't lock it back up. I wandered through the maze of vehicles, idly picking through them while trying to fight the raging emotions in my mind. I opened the door of an old pick up and fell into a coughing fit from the stench. The driver's body was slumped back against the leather seat, his hands limply at his sides and his head back. The interior splattered in dried blood belonging to the man. I sucked in a deep breath of fresh air and hopped into the truck, searching aimlessly for weapons or food. I checked the glove compartment, under the seats, but found nothing. I was stretched out into the backseat, scavenging when Rick's panicked voice called out quietly. I looked out the back window and saw him, crawling under a car. I was confused until I saw several walkers. I slid out of the truck quickly, following Rick's action. I clutched my machete fearfully as the first walker passed by. I took slow and shallow breaths through my nose as I watched the herd of undead feet pass by.

My mind wandered to the days on the highway with Sam and Dean. We had run into a couple of large groups on the highway, but nothing like this. There was possibly fifty of the dead walking around now. _Daryl. _My body went cold in fear as I thought about the hunter. I told myself not to care, but my heart screamed in fear. _Cas, I'm asking you a simple favor. Please make sure he is alive. I can't lose any more people. _The shuffling of walkers began to dull and the ground looked clear. I waited eagerly, my adrenaline pumping wildly in my veins, as I looked to Rick. He was a few cars down from me, and I could see his scruffy face looking for danger. His shoulders loosened in relief and I could see little Sophia watching him for orders. When he seemed to relax, Sophia tentatively worked her way out from under the car, thinking it was all clear to come out. She began to move, when suddenly her scream rang out.

I rolled out from under the truck and I ran to her. She scrambled under the guard rail and down the sloped highway with two walkers trailing behind. I jumped the rail and followed her terrified shrieks. My hunter instincts were on high alert, as I ran after Sophia. Branches cut at my arms and face, but I felt nothing. I saw Sophia running, tears and cries of fear coming from her young face. She was close, but so were the walkers. I pushed my legs to go faster so I could cut her off and get her back safely. I burst through a large bush and landed right in Sophia's path. She crashed into me and her little arms clung to me desperately. Her sobs shook her tiny frame and I picked her up quickly. I could hear the moans of the walkers and knew I had to move. I ran with Sophia in my arms, hoping the farther we ran into the woods we could lose the two walkers, but it was useless. I was tiring quickly and couldn't continue on. I had to find a safe place for Sophia so I could handle those monsters. I found a little creek and ran into it. The dirt walls had caved in slightly and made a perfect little cave hole. I sat Sophia back on her feet and grabbed her shuddering shoulders. "Sophia, listen to me. I need you to stay and hide in there," I said calmly. Her brown eyes went wide and her voice was all panic as she begged, "No, please don't leave me." The fear in her eyes was heart wrenching and made me sick to my stomach. I didn't want to leave her, but I had to kill these guys. If she was there I wouldn't be able to focus on them without worrying about her safety. I took her small hands in mine and held her terrified gaze. "Do you trust me?" I asked. Her little head nodded and I continued on, "I won't let anything hurt you, I promise. Just stay here and I will come back for you." She gave a shaky approval and went to hide in the hole.

I stood in the water, watching the tree line for the two walkers. My machete hung tightly from my hand as the moaning got louder. I gave a loud whistle as they entered my line of sight. Their clouded eyes locked on me and I began to trot away from Sophia and down the creek. I continued to call out to them as they followed me. It was stupid to do because these weren't the only walkers in the woods, but I had to keep their focus on me. Their steps were fast and jumpy as they chased me deep into the Georgia woods. I began to slow mine, closing the distance between us. Their teeth ground noisily together and their arms stretched out in greed. I swung the blade into the closest one, the weapon making a sick sound as it broke through the bone and hit the brain. The last one was a step away and I pulled my machete out of the head to attack. Only the blade was stuck. I gave another hard tug, but it didn't budge. _Aw, fuck me. _I let go of the machete and kicked out at the oncoming walker. It stumbled back and I grabbed my hunting knife. The walker moved forward, arms swinging lazily at its side, and I rushed it. I slammed into the dead body, my knife entering the eye socket of the walker. We fell to the ground together and I rolled on the hard earth, taking a few deep breaths. _That was close. _I took a moment to calm myself and then I was up, gathering my weapons and hurrying back to the creek.

I hadn't gone far from the spot I left her. I called out softly as I got closer; trying to warn her it was me and not a walker or somebody else. I expected her blonde head to pop out of the hole at my voice, but I saw nothing. I looked at the cub hole and it was empty. "Sophia?" I called out gently, hoping she was still around hiding behind a tree. "Sophia?" I called out again a little louder when she didn't answer. I was met with the sound of the woods and my chest pounded nervously. "Sophia!" I yelled, not caring about the walkers anymore. I ran up and down the creek, searching the trees that surrounded the water, but nothing. _Relax, she's a smart kid. She's safe. She probably found her way back to the group. _I sprinted through the woods back to the highway, wanting to believe that I was right. I broke through the tree line and crawled up the slope, hoping to find that little head of blonde hair. When I reached the top, my breathing was ragged and the group was staring at me with sadness. I looked around frantically, hoping that the expressions were wrong and Carol's sobs were not of heartbreak. But that little head of blonde hair was nowhere to be seen. My chest tightened like a noose around my neck. _You lost her. You failed to bring her back. You couldn't save her._ I turned away from the group and ran back down the slope into the woods, screaming Sophia's name. Somebody kept calling after me, but I had to find her. I promised that I would keep her safe. She trusted me and right now I had failed again. "Sophia! Sophia!" I screamed out through the silent woods.

A hand curled around my bicep and pulled me to a stop. I spun around and found myself face to face with Daryl. I gave a dirty scowl and tried to move forward, but his grip was tight. "Just calm down a minute," his southern voice commanded. "I need to find her," I said determined and tried to pull away again, but he just grabbed my other arm tight, keeping me square in front of him. "You're not going to find her like this," he explained forcefully, "You're going to get yourself killed and then how do think you're gonna find her?" It was all too much. I told Sophia that I would protect her and I couldn't. "I promised her that she would be safe! That I would come back for her! Now she's lost in the woods, scared and alone with nobody to defend her and it's my goddamn fault!" I yelled and ripped my arms out of his tight grip. His face was the usual angry frown as I stood in front of him, my arms trembling. I saw Rick, Shane, and Glenn behind Daryl, looks of grief lining their features. Rick took a step forward, locking eyes with my fire of green, "We're going to find her. We won't leave till we do." I stared at him blankly as he continued, "Where was the last place you saw her?" he offered. I gave a curt nod and lead the men to the creek bed.

The guilt was creeping into my mind. I could feel it crushing my heart and drowning my thoughts. It was my fault Carol was on the highway crying her heart out, my fault that Sophia was lost in these damn woods. I couldn't do my job and save her. _'Stop this A. You did what you could. You can't let this eat at you.' _the voice was gruff as I listened. My stomach dropped and I looked frantically to the men following me. None of them were fazed. It was like the time in the office when the demons attacked, only this voice was Dean's. Daryl's hard glare was on me as I tried to cope with the voice I just heard. His brow furrowed in confusion at my wandering gaze, and I knew he was trying to see what I saw or was looking for. He wouldn't find it though because these damn voices were in my head. They were so realistic, like they were standing right next to me. They could have saved Sophia. If Sam and Dean were here she would be safe on the highway with Carol. _She's not dead. Pull yourself together and start acting the damn hunter you are._ So I did. I've been through this before and have always found the person. I was Aria Redford and I was going to find Sophia alive, not dead. So I locked away the guilt and endless questions about the voices and started thinking like the hunter I am.

As we came to the edge of the creek I explained the events. Daryl was already looking for tracks and was starting to follow them. I followed him as Rick told Glenn and Shane to go back to the others and wait for us. Daryl and I walked side by side along the tracks, keeping an eye out for secondary prints. _Why would she run? Something had to spook her out of that little cave._ Maybe it wasn't a walker. I mean since the end of days happened I haven't seen any other monsters. I mean the other day at the nursing home was the first demons I had seen since this shit started, and those fuckers were out to get the brothers and me. But that didn't mean that they had all disappeared. It was day time so it couldn't be a werewolf and a wendigo would be after us so that was another no. As far as I know these woods aren't haunted so it couldn't be a ghost or vengeful spirit. That left walkers or demons, and both of those would have left footprints. We followed the tracks in silence, listening for any signs of the little girl. Her tracks lead to the highway, but then suddenly swerved off and back into the large forest.

Frustration was eating at me as her footsteps became harder to follow and the light in the sky was draining. _We should have found her by now. _But I didn't want to focus on that. Sophia was a smart girl. She could have found her way back to the highway or be up in a tree hiding, waiting for rescue. A slew of gurgled moans echoed in the silence, and the three of us dropped down to a crouch. Rick and I followed Daryl as he moved closer to the noise. He signaled for Rick to distract the walker, and the cop stood and ran. Rick stopped when he saw the corpse and called out. The walker stumbled out from behind a large oak tree with a snarl. The arrow flew through the air with precision and lodged itself between the man's eyes. We circled around the walker and Rick crouched next to it, pulling out a pair of gloves. Putting them on, he began searching the mouth of the walker. "What are you doing?" Daryl asked, as Rick moved the head up and down to get a better look. "Flesh between the teeth," he responded. He thought that maybe Sophia had been eaten. My skin went cold at the thought. Daryl crouched down next to Rick as he pulled out a little switch blade. Daryl sat his crossbow down, and pulled out his massive hunting knife. "You ever gut anything before?" he asked the cop. Rick shook his head, and Daryl pulled out his own gloves, "Then it's best I do this."

I stood off to the side watching nervously as Daryl plunged the sharpened knife into the belly. He worked the blade down and up cautiously as he cut through the thick sinews of muscle. Rick looked green as Daryl opened the belly and stuck his hands deep within. My heart was racing as Daryl pulled out all kinds of black, diseased organs. I was used to seeing mangled bodies, but I was not going to be okay if Daryl found pieces of Sophia in that stomach. He pulled out the swollen organ and carefully opened it. I couldn't see anything but black mush, but Rick and Daryl picked through the contents, examining the digested lumps. My heart was out of control as Daryl held up an odd piece of bone. "Looks like hoss here had himself a woodchuck," he said, studying the little skull and flicking it away. The nervous energy drained out of me and my beating heart slowed. "Well at least we know," Rick said relieved. "Yeah," I mumbled and began to walk back to the highway. The sun was setting and although I was relieved it wasn't parts of Sophia in that belly, we still didn't know where she was.

"We're gonna find her," Daryl said lowly as he matched his stride with mine. I turned to him and saw the determination in his blue eyes. He wasn't going to give up on her. In that moment, I saw who Daryl really was. He didn't owe Carol or Sophia anything, but he cared. He was going to look for her not only because it was the right thing to do, but because those thick walls of mistrust were falling. We reached the highway and the group stood huddled next to the guard rail. I kept my head low, all that guilt washing over me like a flood as I heard Carol's choked sob. "We found a walker," Rick stated, "But it didn't get Sophia." "We cut him open to make sure," Daryl added softly, trying to reassure her. It was quiet for a moment when through the tears Carol asked desperately, "Why did you leave her? She was just a little girl, and you left her alone." My throat tightened and my eyes burned with tears. The blame consumed me like the black night and I could feel the air leave my lungs as she spoke to me. Dean's voice from before echoed in my mind, but I couldn't help how my heart felt. My green eyes looked up into her red rimmed ones. "I'm going to find her," my voice low and weak, but then I said with more conviction, "I'm not going to let your daughter die. I promised her that I would protect her and I plan on making good on that." I turned away from everybody and walked down the highway. I walked until I found a semi and climbed up the trailer. I stood silently, watching the bright orange ball slip away, welcoming the faint moon. I took a deep breath, releasing it slowly while my eyes looked up into the darkening sky. "Castiel, I don't know where you are or what is happening up there, but you need to get here now. I really need your help. It's a little girl and I just need you to find her and bring her back to her mother. Please Cas? I know you can hear me, so no more ignoring my prayers and get your feathery ass down here." I watched the sky hopefully, waiting for that flutter of wings. But nothing ever came. My shoulders fell and I sat in defeat. _Where are you? _


	15. Chapter 15

***Sorry this took so long to upload. Anyway, I hope you enjoy.* **

The morning sun glared at us with fierce heat. It was mid-morning and sweat dripped down my face like a leaky faucet. Rick was droning on about the search plans, but I was only half listening, constantly glancing to the woods. _We are wasting time standing around like this. _I was up at dawn, waking everybody so we could get the search going as soon as possible. The lack of sleep and guilt made me weak, but I was going to help find Sophia no matter what. Daryl was eyeing me from the edge of the group. I looked to him and found a look of worry on his face. He thought I was going to get hurt with the lack of sleep, but what could you do when your dreams haunt you? With Sophia missing, my dreams last night had been vile, dredging up memories that could make those heartless angels cry. _No, you need to focus on Sophia. You are going to find her, this is your job. Saving people and killing evil shit. _"Aria and Daryl will take point since they know how to track," Rick explained looking to the two of us for confirmation. I gave a quick nod, checking the ammo on my gun and sliding it back in my waistband. "Let's go."

Like yesterday, Daryl and I walked side by side, watching the ground for tracks. The group was silent as we crept through the hot forest. We walked for miles, when suddenly a shrill ringing sounded in the forest. We all paused and listened as the sound came again. _Bells?_ I looked to Daryl for confirmation and then took off in a sprint. I could hear the group following, Daryl right behind me. The woods were tough to maneuver with the fallen tree trunks and thick underbrush, but none of it fazed me. _It had to be Sophia. _I finally broke through the wild forest and into a large clearing with tombstones and a little white church. I paused as I studied the building. _Wasn't there supposed to be a bell tower?_ Rick and Shane stopped too and noticed the same thing. "It can't be the same church," Shane stated, but then the bells started again. I ran forward, not caring if there wasn't a damn bell on top of the building. It was the first place we had stumbled upon that Sophia could be hiding in. I took the steps in two strides and swung the large doors wide open. I expected that little head of blonde hair and freckled cheeks to be sitting at the altar, waiting for rescue, but when did my expectations ever fan out? Three walkers turned their decaying bodies towards us. I just stood like a statue as Daryl, Rick, and Shane cleared the little church. Glenn found a little box that created the bell sound, and the group wandered around the grounds in discouragement.

I leaned against the white-painted rails, staring off into the vast woods. I could hear Rick calling out for Sophia, but she wasn't here. I heard his quiet steps approach, but I continued to gaze into the distance. Daryl stood next me, silence falling between us. "You can't blame yourself for this," his voice low as his gaze burned into me. I sighed and looked up into that sea of blue. How could I explain to him that this was my job? That by finding Sophia I could prove to myself that I could still save people? But I couldn't explain anything to him because nobody knew the secrets I did, the evils that haunted this world. It wouldn't even matter if I told them, they would all think I was crazy and I didn't need that. I was trapped in my own little world, gazing into those eyes, when cautiously he raised a hand to my face. He seemed unsure of himself, but then he pulled a lock of hair from my face and tucked it behind my ear. He studied his movements, watching himself for mistakes before looking back at me for an okay. He didn't move his hand from my face and instead stroked my cheek with his thumb. It was soothing and my eyes shut unwillingly at the comfort. I leaned into his touch, relishing in his gentleness because I was afraid it wouldn't last long. "We're gonna find that little girl," he said soothingly, but with a force behind his words. I knew that finding Sophia meant just as much for him as it did for me.

I nodded in response, my eyes still closed. But then his warm hand disappeared and I could hear the faint voices of the group. I opened my eyes regretfully, expecting to find Daryl's retreating form, but he stood in the same spot. I wanted to kiss him so badly in that moment, to be wrapped in his warm embrace and know that I was safe. But then I remembered that Sophia was still lost, wanting the same thing and she was so far away from it. I walked away abruptly, knowing that I was leaving Daryl extremely confused.

**Daryl POV**

_What just happened? _I paced back and forth on the old porch confused and pissed off. I thought I did everything right. _Why did she just walk away like that?_ I folded my hands behind my head, trying to figure out the past five minutes. She was happy. I could see the joy on her tired face. It was the first time I had seen her like that since the brothers passed away. _Maybe she didn't want to be with me after all? _I thought that night at the CDC was more than just sex, but maybe it wasn't? No, she opened up to me about her past, and the way she leaned into my touch, she wanted more than a fuck buddy. I mean she told me she cared. '_You better come back to me.' _ That was what she told me before I went to find Merle. But then the brothers died and she changed. She just shut down. I didn't know what to do. How did you help somebody who didn't want it? So I tried to give her space. But I did that and she nearly drank herself to death. All I wanted was to make her smile again. Even if it was a sad one it was better than the usual frown she wore.

My mind was a tangle of thoughts. I was afraid to let her in. Afraid that she would judge me for the man I was. Then I open up to her, and I think maybe for once my life won't suck, but now this. She was playing a game of tug-a-war with my emotions. You could see the vulnerability in her and my mind screamed to comfort her, but then that little voice would beat me down. I was able to push that damn voice away today, pushing myself to give her some comfort. Now it was being thrown back in my face. _Well, if that's how she is gonna be then fuck her. I don't need her. _I stormed off the porch, waiting impatiently to move on. Rick gathered us, saying Shane and him were going to continue searching this area a little more. I wanted to protest as he said the rest of us were to go back to the RV, but it was already mid-afternoon and we had a long hike back. Carl jumped in asking his father if he could join them and I zoned out. Aria was standing away from the group, a mixture of anger, disappointment, and tiredness on her soft features. I couldn't help the angry scowl on my face, when she caught me looking. Her eyes flashed in regret and she turned away from me, walking back into the church as Rick finished with his instructions.

I didn't think it was possible to make my mind more jumbled. My thoughts were more tangled than a pair of headphones in a pocket. _Did she regret the way she left me standing on the porch? Or maybe she regretted everything? _I tuned out the thoughts in my head when the group began to move towards the woods. I saw Aria come out of the church at the same time, but I ignored her as I made my way to the front, leading everybody back.

This walk would have been peaceful, but with Sophia still missing and Carol's grief radiating throughout the entire world, it sucked. Aria stayed in the back of the group and for that I was thankful. I was still confused about what happened back at the church. We hiked nonstop for what seemed like hours, before we rested at a fallen log. The tension in the group was thick as buttermilk. Lori stood up suddenly, pulling out a tiny six-shooter and handing it over to Andrea. "What?" Andrea asked confused at the offering. "You keep giving me dirty looks and I'm tired of it. You want it so badly then take it." Andrea took the gun, and Lori continued on angrily, "You all look at me like I have it all, like I'm some spoiled bitch. It's bullshit." _Fucking women._ I just ignored her rant, waiting till they were ready. Glenn looked uncomfortable listening to the women and I couldn't blame the man. I wasn't a shoulder to cry on and I didn't want to hear about their little drama. When Lori finished, Andrea stood up, handing the gun back. I checked to make sure the group was ready and saw that Aria had wandered off about fifty feet or so. I gave a low growl and went after her.

She was very still, watching the distance intently. "What the hell are you doing?" I asked in anger. She held her hand up to silence me and I frowned in confusion. She listened for a moment and then turned her emerald glare on me. "I thought I heard something," she said blandly. My senses went on high alert as I scanned the woods. I could see the look of confusion on Aria's face and the memory of her wandering gaze from yesterday flitted in my mind. "Maybe it was just me..." she mumbled and without an explanation made her way back to the group. Everybody looked at us in confusion, but I ignored it and lead them back to the highway. Aria didn't go to the back as she had before. Instead she walked along side me, her hand on her machete. I tried to think of things to talk to her about. I thought about asking her what happened back at the church or her little wander, but that little voice in my head told me to check my junk and make sure I didn't have a vagina suddenly. So, our hiked continued in silence.

The tall trees cast long, dark shadows across the floor of the forest. The sun creating a light orange sky as it dipped below the tree line. An echoed gunshot caused us to freeze in our steps. We all listened for any danger nearby, but heard nothing. I shrugged it off, we were close to the highway, and hopefully would be safer. Yet, Lori began to worry, "Maybe something happened to them?" she questioned. "It was probably just a walker," I responded. She shook her head, "No, Rick wouldn't have risked using one bullet on a walker." She had a point, but there was nothing we could do except for go back to the highway like Rick said. "I'm sure they are fine," Andrea offered sincerely. Lori didn't respond, but she started to move again.

"You know there are worse things than walkers in this world," her breeze like voice said only for my ears. I kept my eyes forward, answering her in the same low voice, "There would have been more gunshots if they got attacked." She didn't respond and we continued in silence. A small breeze rustled the leaves above when she spoke again. "I'm sorry." I watched her from the corner of my eyes. Her eyes were forward and her body looked weak with exhaustion. "What for?" my voice curt. She gave a heavy sigh, "Daryl, I know that was a bitch move back there and I'm trying to apologize. You don't want to hear it, well too bad." That low voice had risen loud enough for some of the others to hear. Aria realized that, quickly quieting down, "I just...I don't have an excuse for the way I acted. I'm just fucked up." _Does she really think that lowly of herself? How could a girl with her confidence and strength think like that? _The mystery of who she was continued to grow. "You're not fucked up," I said with truth. I heard her give a small chuckle and then a booming scream rang out. Aria and I moved instinctively to the noise, our weapons drawn, and the others following. "Andrea!" she shouted, searching the thick forest fervently for the blonde. I saw a small struggle ahead of us and charged forward, the group on my heels. We were a foot away, when a short-haired brunette rode in on a horse, smashing a bat into the walkers head.

"Lori Grimes?" the woman on the horse questioned Andrea hurriedly. _What?_ Lori stepped forward then, telling the woman who she was. "Your husband Rick sent me. Carl's been shot. I need you to come with me now," the brunette explained. Lori dropped her bags and hopped on the horse without any more of an explanation. "Whoa, wait a second! We don't who she is!" I hollered. Lori just ignored me, and the woman spoke again, "Rick said you have a group on the highway?" Glenn answered her in a daze and she continued on, "Double back about two miles, and take a left on to a dirt road. The mailbox will say the name Greene." With that the two women were off. We were all stunned at the news._ Maybe they were attacked like Aria thought? _The walker that the brunette hit sat up abruptly, startling everyone. I was aggravated with the lack of information. On top of that another innocent kid was hurt. "Shut up," I said dismissively to the corpse, and shot an arrow into its weak skull.

"Let's go," I growled, pulling the arrow from the walker and storming off towards the highway. _Who takes a kid out into the woods like that? Stupid cops. _About ten minutes later we were out of the woods and back on the the highway. Dale immediately bombarded us with questions. "What happened out there? We heard somebody screaming? And where's Lori?" I was still pissed about what had transpired, when I said, "Carl got shot." That threw Dale into frenzy, questioning everything. "Look man, Rick sent the woman. There was nothing I could do," That got Dale off my back for the time being and I went to my bike. I tried tuning out the frantic questions and explanations. We needed a plan. The group was split, and we couldn't just leave. Sophia was still out in the woods, but then Carl is at some random house with a bullet hole. We didn't even know how bad the kid was injured.

"What happened to you?" her voice full of concern. I looked up from by bike to find Aria crouched in front of a not so healthy looking T-Dog. His eyes swam with delirium and his body slumped in exhaustion. "I think he's got blood poisoning from that cut on his arm," Dale commented. I immediately began searching through my bag for Merle's stash of pills. He may have been a pain in my ass, but the guy kept good drugs. I rifled through them looking for his Clap medication. Dumbass Merle going off sleeping with all kinds of nasty women, it didn't surprise me when I found out. I heard Aria questioning T-Dog behind me, and I remembered her telling me about her time in the military. When I found the bottle of pills, I watched as she checked T-Dog. She knew her stuff. She checked his pulse and temperature, saying that the way his skin felt he was probably suffering from a high fever. Then she unwrapped his arm with the deep cut. It was a long slice that took up his whole forearm. It needed stitches. The skin around the cut was swollen with infection. "Damn it T-Dog. You should have had somebody take care of this yesterday," she said with frustration. I nudged her shoulder, and her green eyes locked with mine. "Antibiotics, and not the over the counter shit either," I explained, handing her the bottle. She looked at it for a minute, giving me a look saying 'really', but I just shrugged.

"What are we going to do about the farm?" Glenn asked. Carol, who had stayed quiet the entire day, spoke up finally. "I'm not leaving without Sophia." "Well, we can't be separated like this and T-Dog needs help," Dale explained. Carol's face was set in desperation, "I'm not leaving until we find my daughter." We weren't getting anywhere in this decision. Carol wanted to stay and I couldn't blame her, but we couldn't stay separated like this. "We're staying, Glenn take T-Dog and go to the farm. Tell Rick that we'll meet him there tomorrow," Aria commanded. Glenn looked like he wanted to argue, but the look on her face stopped him. She turned to Carol, her expression softening, "We'll stay tonight, see if she shows up. If not then we will leave supplies for her and come back every day till we find her." Carol just looked at her, hurt and relief on her face. She left and went into the RV, while we packed one of the cars with some supplies and sent Glenn and T-Dog on their way.

We watched the two drive off, hoping the best for Carl. With the sun low in the sky, Andrea and Dale made a small meal of some canned beans. Carol came out of the RV to eat, her eyes puffy and as soon as she finished she retreated back to the bed she laid in all evening. Aria never joined us. I could see her shadowy form down the highway, staring out in the dark forest. I grabbed a plate, spooning some of the leftovers on it, and walked over to her. "Brought you some dinner," I said plainly, handing the plate over. She smiled gently, muttering a small 'thanks.' We stood side by side, listening to the silence of the world.

I spared a glance at Aria and her comment from earlier floated in my mind. "Why do you think you're so fucked up?" I asked causing Aria to face me, her green eyes dark with the night. She shrugged her shoulders, looking anywhere but at me. "Cause I am." I rolled my eyes, "That's not an answer." "Why do you care?" she asked suddenly, her voice calm. I looked at her, my eyes squinted in confusion. "You know I really don't get you. I let you beat my ass so you could get over your grief. I didn't just fuck you and leave. I protected you from the explosion, and then I try to reach out to you today, try to give you some fucking comfort because seeing you like this is screwing with me. I did all that because I care because you're amazing. You're confident, brave, hard-headed, tender, and for some damn reason I can't get you outta my head," I fumed, my blood pounding in my head, and my hands shaking slightly. Aria stared speechless, her green eyes wide and her mouth hung slightly open. My thoughts were racing a mile a minute and I continued to spit it all out, tired of the constant nagging. "I hate the way other guys stare at you. I was jealous of Sam and Dean because they always made you smile. I panicked when that walker grabbed you, and I thought I was too late. You're the only person I ever told about the beatings I took. Hell, not even my brother knows." I sucked in a deep breath, my voice falling to defeat, "Shit girl, you drive me damn near insane every day, but at least with you I don't have to prove myself. You understand and I've never had anybody in my life that understood my shit."

_Finally, it's all out. _I couldn't take it anymore. I needed her to know and I needed a response. She was still wide-eyed and I watched her process all the information. She continued to stare at me, as I moved towards her, closing the tiny gap between us. She watched my movements deliberately, as I brought my hands to each side of her face. Her forest eyes bore into mine, full of doubts and questions. I leaned down, and heard her soft breathing hitch. A smile graced my lips as I pressed our foreheads together. Her body relaxed into my touch as she rested her soft hands on my forearms. I shut my eyes, sighing softly. She didn't have to say anything as long as I could stay like this. I could forget about my past, the walkers, and Merle all in this moment. "You can't do this Daryl," she whispered. "Can't tell me what to do girl." "I'm not good for you. I'm poisonous. I'm broken," her words almost inaudible. I opened my eyes to find hers drowning in despair. "Then I'll fix you," and with that I caught her trembling lips in a tender kiss.

She hesitated and then began to kiss back. Aria's hands traveled up my arms, locking behind my neck, pulling me closer to deepen the kiss. I obliged and pulled away slightly, biting her bottom lip teasingly. Her lips parted and our tongues explored, eliciting soft moans of pleasure. My hands trailed down her sides deliberately, resting at her hips. I pushed her back till she was pressed against the car behind us, my body pressing firmly up against hers. Our lungs gasped for air, as I moved my hands to her ass and gave a small squeeze. She smiled against my lips, and then moved hers to the base of my throat, making me groan. She kissed up and down my neck, giving a love bite to the hollow of my throat, making me squeeze her tighter and growl in want. Those smooth hands trailed teasingly across the skin above my waistband, causing me to rock my hips into her.

"Daryl?" Dale called out softly. I groaned in frustration, dropping my head to Aria's shoulder. "Yeah," I called out annoyed. I could see Dale's flashlight coming closer, and reluctantly pulled myself away from Aria. When he came into view, Dale gave us a quick once over before I asked in my usual gruff voice, "What?" He stopped looking between us and finally laid his eyes on me, "Time for your shift on watch." "Alright," I murmured, turning to give Aria a sorry look. Dale turned and I went to follow, but Aria called out, "Daryl, can I talk to you for a moment," Both Dale and I turned to her, and I could see that she was slightly nervous. "Go ahead, I'll be right there," I said to Dale. He continued on with no questions, leaving us together again. Her eyes were towards the ground as she started to speak, "I...um...I'm not really good at letting people in or this," she said gesturing between us. I smiled at her, the nervousness cute since she was always sure of herself. "I'm not either." She looked up from the ground then, hope in her eyes. She gave a small smile in return, "We should probably get back to the RV before Dale comes searching."

**Aria's POV**

When we reached the RV, Daryl climbed up the small ladder to the top of the vehicle to keep watch, while I went inside, hoping to find some sleep. But as I climbed the three steps into the mobile home, I heard Carol's strangled cries. The good mood I was in from being with Daryl vanished and I again was consumed with grief. Andrea sat at the little kitchen table, cleaning and reassembling her gun. I took a seat across from her, watching her work and listening to Carol. I could see her curled up in a tight ball on the twin size bed, a pillow clutched to her chest, and her face hidden in the pillow, trying to muffle her cries. It broke my heart to see her like that. "She's been like that all night," Andrea said in a gentle whisper. I could never imagine Carol's pain. It was one thing to lose a friend or a family member or even your spouse, but to lose a child was unthinkable. I couldn't help the guilt that coursed through me. I got up and went into the small bedroom. Carol didn't notice me till I sat on the edge of the bed. She looked up from her pillow startled, her eyes puffy and watery. I could see the blame in her sad eyes as she looked at me, and it only made the guilt worse.

"I've lost a lot of people in my life," I started, "and I know sorry isn't going to bring your daughter back. But I want you to know that I did everything I could to keep her safe and that I am going to find her." Her eyes softened a bit, but I knew it wouldn't do much to make her feel better. I sat for another minute, and then stood. "Do you believe in angels?" I asked Carol. She looked at me puzzled, "Yes, why do you ask?" I gave a weak smile, "Because I think angels are going to protect her." I could see the tears spilling over and a faint glint of hope in her pained eyes. I left the room, curling up at the table with Andrea, feeling hopeless.


	16. Chapter 16

***This is a longer chapter and full of surprises. There is a sexual assault scene and I just wanted to warn you. The next few chapters might take a while to get up. School starts up again and with that and work, it might take longer. But I promise that I will try to update as soon as possible. Enjoy and reviews are always nice***

The sky was a clear blue with wisps of fluffy clouds. We painted a sign on Carol's station wagon, letting Sophia know to stay here and we would come every day for her. We piled all kinds of food and drinks on the hood. When we were done, Carol stood by the guard rail, waiting till we were packed and ready to move on. I pulled the last of the supplies from the station wagon and piled it into the RV. Daryl hopped on his motorcycle, waiting for me, as Andrea and Dale started up the RV. I went over to Carol, her shoulders slouched, and her thin arms pulled tightly around herself. "We're not giving up on the search. Wherever this farm is, we'll search from there." She nodded solemnly and let me lead her back to the RV. Our talk last night eased the tension between us. I could tell she still blamed me, but at the same time, she appreciated my devotion to her daughter. I got on the bike, wrapping my arms around Daryl's waist and we were off.

It took us thirty minutes to get to the farm. The house I saw at the end of the lengthy dirt drive was stunning. It was a large two story home, painted white with columns and a massive wrap around porch. The house had character, looking younger than it probably was. We pulled up to the front door, scrambling out of our vehicles. Rick came out at the same time we arrived, a wide smile on his face. "He's alive," he said stepping down the stairs, his voice thick with emotion. Everybody took a relieved breath at the news. Our group gathered around Rick and Dale asked, "What happened?" Lori stood behind Rick, her arms wrapped around her husband's shoulders, as he shook his head in disbelief, "It was an accident, a stupid hunting accident."

"If it wasn't for Shane and the man, Otis, Carl wouldn't have made it." An old man with thinning white hair stepped out of the house at the end of Rick's speech. His eyes were a soft brown and he still looked civilized in his crisp white shirt and black suspenders. Behind him was a young man who had his arms wrapped around a young blonde's waist, an older woman with long blonde waves, and the brunette that saved Andrea. "Rick, we're having a funeral service for Otis. If your group wouldn't mind, I would appreciate if you would join us in celebrating his life." The old man spoke with wisdom, his voice soothing and full of knowledge. That's when I noticed the suit coat hanging in the old man's arm, and the black dress and shawl the older blonde wore. "Of course, everybody this is Hershel, his daughter Maggie and Beth, Beth's boyfriend Jimmy, and Otis's wife, Patricia," the sheriff introduced quickly. The family gave us warm smiles, but it was forced because of their grief. "It's a pleasure to meet all y'all. Rick tells me that one of the members in your group is lost," Hershel questioned. "My little girl, Sophia," Carol's words held strength and not the note of weakness from yesterday. Hershel gave an understanding nod, "I have some maps of the land. I'll give them to Rick to help aid you in your search." "Thank you, we greatly appreciate it," Rick replied. "You're welcome. Jimmy gathered some stones for a marker for Otis, since we don't have a body to bury." We all gave a solemn nod and followed Hershel out into his fields. The marker was under a beautiful oak. It towered in the air, commanding your attention with its fullness. It exploded with life; life that was so precious now a days. _I wonder if they chose this as his resting spot for that reason._

We gathered around the marker, Hershel standing at attention, a thin Bible in his hands. I didn't listen to the readings closely. I had my fill of religion the past few years dealing with the angels and all. When the old man finished, he started talking about Otis. "He was a good man, always looking out for others like he did last night. Shane, do you mind telling us about his last moments? In honor of his memory, so we all know his sacrifice." The cop looked uneasy at the request. Without the curly brown hair, he looked like a different man. He seemed more unhinged to me. The curly hair acting like the innocence he still had, but with it all shaved off the innocence was gone. "Um, I'd prefer not to..." "Please? You were the last one with him," Patricia pleaded. Her voice was empty, like so many people when they lose someone they love. All eyes were on Shane as he shifted uncomfortably. He cleared his throat, and started; his voice slightly hoarse from emotion. "We were surrounded. Walkers were everywhere, and they just kept coming. He...he told me that we had to save the boy, that I had to save Carl." Patricia cried in silence as Shane went up to the wheelbarrow, snatching a stone and placing it on Otis's marker. With that the cop limped off towards the farmhouse. Jimmy and Beth guided Patricia back to the house after Shane, and slowly we all followed.

Shane's words sat uneasily in my mind. His story was vague and that never set well with me. I couldn't help but feel like he was hiding something, but I let it go and got ready to search for Sophia. Rick and some of the others were standing by an old red pickup. I stepped up beside Daryl, half-listening to Rick as we waited for the map. Daryl's words from last night played on repeat in my mind. _Is it right to do this?_ _I know that this is what I wanted, but was it fair to him? _He didn't know anything about me, about the things I carry with me, the dangers that follow me and those I love. _Was it right to let him fall blindly into my life without knowing the risks? _But none of that really mattered because I wouldn't be able to stay away from him. His touch erased my mind of all thought. I was a ball of play-do in his hands. I never felt like that before, so out of control. I feared it and loved it all at the same time. I pushed the thoughts away when Rick laid the map out across the hood.

"Okay, we have a lot of land to cover. I think we should split into groups and section the land off for each party. Andrea and T-Dog you guys can search through this part. Daryl and Aria this, and Shane and I will go here," he said, pointing to various parts on the map. "You're not going out," Hershel said. Rick looked at the man confused, "Yeah I am." "You just donated four pints of blood in twenty-four hours. If you go out there you are going to faint. You need to rest." Rick nodded in understanding. "Well then I'll just search it myself," Shane said stepping up to get a better look at the map. "Absolutely not, that ankle needs rest or else you're going to make it worse," Hershel scolded. Shane wasn't happy about it, but he listened anyway. "You guys be careful out there, watch each other's backs." We all gave a brief nod and took off on our separate ways.

The woods bursted with life; the birds and insects calling out wildly. The underbrush rustled with tiny critters searching for home. The ground was rough, covered in wild plants and fallen branches. The woods were a dangerous place if you didn't know them, but I couldn't help but feel at ease. I loved the woods. They brought me as much comfort as the windows down and music blaring from my mustang. Yet, Sophia was lost in these woods and as much as I wanted to think of these woods as safe, they weren't. I followed behind Daryl, eyes scanning the vast land. There were no tracks as we continued our search. _Maybe the farm was too far from the highway? Maybe we should be searching there? _I pushed the thoughts away as we walked into a clearing, a small two story home sitting in the middle. The house looked like it was abandoned before the apocalypse, the paint chipping away, and shutters hanging loosely from its hinges. I followed Daryl up the porch steps, scouring the area for walkers. When he reached the door, Daryl turned back to me, his eyes asking if I was ready. I tightened my hold on my machete and nodded. With that Daryl pushed the door open, crossbow aimed, searching. I stayed right behind Daryl covering our backs, as we moved through each room of the house, silent as wolves stalking their prey.

The inside was completely dark, the only light coming in from the cracked shutters or bare windows. Dust clung to the furniture like a second skin. We reached the kitchen and my heart fell. It was the last room in the house and no Sophia. I took one last look of the room and noticed a door slightly open. I clicked my tongue and Daryl looked at me. I tilted my head towards the door, and he silently moved towards it with me flanking. He grabbed the handle and threw it open. There was nothing inside, but bunched up on the floor was a small pillow and lots of blankets. The hope burned within me like a wildfire. The space wasn't big enough for an adult, but big enough for a small child. But the question still remained, if she was staying here, where was she now? Daryl and I left the house, checking the backyard. "Sophia!" he hollered, but only the birds chirped back in response. "Maybe she found another house to hole up in?" I said, thinking out loud. But Daryl didn't seem to hear me, his attention focused on the bushes growing. He walked up to them slowly, admiring the wild green plant. He crouched down, his hand caressing a beautiful flower. It was unique in my book. I had never seen a flower like that. "What is it?" I asked, curious as to why it had the hunter's attention. "It's a Cherokee Rose. The story is that when American soldiers were moving Indians off their land on the Trail of Tears, the Cherokee mothers were grieving and crying so much because they were losing their little ones along the way from exposure and disease and starvation. A lot of them just disappeared. So the elders, they said a prayer; asked for a sign to uplift the mothers' spirits, give them strength and hope. The next day this rose started to grow where the mothers' tears fell."

A soft smile made its way to my lips. "I think Carol could use that," I said and knew Daryl was thinking the same. He cut the flower, sliding it safely into his shirt pocket. I hoped that it would help ease Carol's heavy heart. Sophia meant everything to her. She was her reason to live. Her husband was abusive, but knowing she had Sophia gave her something to look forward to in life. Now her little girl was gone and she was lost. I couldn't help but sympathize with the woman. Sam and Dean meant everything to me. They made me family, showing me how to feel again. My chest clenched with sadness. I couldn't just move on. I hear their voices and every time it's like another punch to the gut. I just kept hoping that I was going to turn around and the two of them would be behind me, making some comment about me being stupid thinking they could stay away.

A breeze swept through the forest, rustling the still leaves making the forest sigh in content. As the gentle wind hit me, I felt cool hands grip my shoulder. I looked to Daryl but he was ahead of me. _What just happened? _I know I felt someone grab me, but the only other person in the woods was Daryl and there was no way he could have done it. "Daryl, did you feel that?" He turned around, a look of confusion written into his features. "Feel what?" "The breeze, did you feel it?" His brow furrowed even more, "What breeze?" I stared at him in disbelief, "The one that just came through. You didn't feel it?" "Girl, there was no breeze. It's still hotter than the gates of Hell," he said. _How could that be? _I looked around the forest, searching for an answer. I know what I felt. There was a breeze and something touched me. "Hey, you okay?" he asked walking up to me, laying a hand to my forehead. "I'm not suffering from a heat stroke. I just...I don't know," I said with frustration. "Come on, group's gonna be wondering where we're at." I followed Daryl, but I was still unsettled.

They watched the hunters walk away, their hearts heavy as they studied the female. "Is this right?" he asked. The one beside him sighed with defeat. "I don't know man, but you hear the way she thinks. I just have to give her some sort of comfort." "But we're only confusing her. Maybe we need to let her cope her own way. We shouldn't even be doing this." "When has rules ever stopped us before? She's family and I can't see her like this." "You think it's easy for me? I just don't want to make this any harder for her than it already is," he snapped back at the other man. "Me neither, but she needs us." The two looked at each other and then turned to catch a glimpse of the fleeting forms of the hunters before disappearing with a breeze as soft as a sigh.

When we returned back to the farm Daryl went to the RV to give Carol the flower while I went to set up my tent. I took a spot that was a little farther from the center of our small camp and under a towering oak. I let the wild thoughts loose in my mind as I got the tent up. Sophia, the brothers, Daryl, Shane, the voices, and the strange breeze flooded through getting tangled with each other till they were more knotted than long hair blowing free in the wind. A pair of hands grabbed my hips and a stubborn smile made its way to my lips. "Really Daryl?" I asked amusement in my voice. "Sorry sweetheart, wrong man," the voice said. My heart thundered loudly and I ripped myself from his hands, spinning around and coming face to face with a smirking Shane. "Don't fucking touch me," I growled, my voice dripping with threat. Shane leaned back against the trunk of the large oak full of amusement. "Seemed to like it the other night," his voice cocky. A chill ran through my veins as I remember his slithering hands and vile words. We stared each other down, till I heard his silent footsteps. "What's going on here?" he asked with his southern drawl. I ignored Daryl, continuing to glare at Shane. "Nothing man," Shane said, eyes still on me. "Wasn't asking you was I?" he snapped back. Shane broke contact, looking to Daryl, his smirk growing wider. "Nothing, Shane was just leaving," I answered. The two men stared e other down till Shane finally began to walk away.

I rubbed my temples, exhaling in and out slowly, waiting for my body to calm. Daryl watched me intently with his ocean eyes, but all I wanted was to go inside my tent and get away from everything. "What happened?" he questioned with worry in his eyes. "Nothing," I said my voice curt. "Bullshit,You were ready to beat the shit out of him. So don't tell me nothing happened." "Nothing happened! Just back off," I snapped and began to unzip my tent. Daryl grabbed my arm, stopping my movements, but I shook him off and slipped into my tent. I was about to zip it closed when he stormed in, his face set in anger. "Daryl..." I started, but was cut off quickly. "Fine, you don't want to talk about it, but don't fucking push me away." I felt like shit for getting pissed at him, but I didn't want to look weak. I wasn't used to people standing up for me, and I knew that Daryl would explode if he found out about Shane. My body sagged in exhaustion, "I'm sorry. There's some things that I need to deal with on my own and I need you to trust me that I can handle it." I watched his blue eyes as he took in my words. He battled internally with the idea. Daryl reminded me of Dean, the way he was so protective of those he cared for, going overboard on little things. I closed the tension filled gap between us, lacing my fingers with his calloused ones. "Please?" my green eyes begged. I watched his resolve crumble, his blue eyes staring into my forest of green. "Yeah," he said lowly. I leaned forward, resting my head against his chest. All the anger that filled the tiny tent dissipated as we stood together.

"I never know what to expect with you," he mumbled, resting his chin on my head. I chuckled lightly, "I like to keep things interesting." I didn't have to see his face to know there was a small smile there.

_"Sam!" The walkers were everywhere, but I couldn't move. I watched as he took down several of them, but he didn't see the one behind him. "Sam, look out!" But my warning was too late and I watched as the walker sunk its decayed teeth into my best friend. "NO!" I cried. I tried to move again, but there was something pinning me to a tree. I watched as several other walkers crowded Sam, ripping into him like a piece of steak. When they were done, Sam laid lifeless, covered in his own blood, intestines hanging out. I begged for help, but instead Oriax showed up. "No, not you," my voice doused in fear. He just cackled and snapped his fingers. Dean suddenly appeared next to me, pinned to another tree. I watched Oriax walk up to him, pull a large kitchen knife from out of nowhere, and plunge it into Dean's chest. "NO!" I screamed. Dean turned to me, blood dripping from his pink lips. "Dean, stay with me, please!" His green eyes stared at me desperately as the life drained out of them. My cheeks were wet with tears, and I turned to see Oriax standing over lifeless Sam. "Leave him alone!" I screamed, but the demon only looked at me with an amused grin. Suddenly Sam started to stand, his soft eyes clouded and empty. "Sam?" Oriax laughed evilly, and pushed him towards me, his jaw clicking in hunger. _

My eyes sprang open finding a bright light. I squinted against the sun's rays and rolled to my back. I stared up at the blue canvas, focusing on my breathing. I listened to the group as they greeted each other warmly. I reminisced the nights when I was young and slept peacefully. After _that night_ I never slept again. Even after those nightmares disappeared, my mind was still plagued with dreams of the hunts I took on. "You gonna sleep all day girl?" I groaned in response. Daryl must have heard because suddenly the flap was being unzipped and the blue eyed hunter stared down at me, crossbow strapped to his back. "Don't make me drag your ass out of this tent," he warned with amusement. I glared at him. "I'd like to see you try," I challenged. Daryl swept down and had me in his arms. I yelped in surprise and started squirming in his arms wildly. He laughed lightly, setting me down on my feet. I crossed my arms over my chest and huffed in fake anger. "Ass," I commented with a stubborn smile. But Daryl's attention was somewhere else. I watched as he slowly looked me up and down. I realized then that I was only wearing a pair of skimpy, blue panties and a tank top with no bra. I blushed at his stare and went to grab a pair of jeans, but his hand stopped me. I looked into those bright eyes that burned with lust.

"Guess you don't want breakfast," I said, the burn of want growing rapidly. "It can wait." His sun dried lips met mine and all control left my body. Those skilled hands slid under the cotton fabric of my tank, trailing up to my breasts. He massaged till moans of pleasure slipped through our locked lips. He pulled away, ripping the fabric up and over my head, and grabbed my waist hungrily, sinking his head to my chest and snatching up one of my breasts, while his other hand gave the other attention. My arms hung loosely around his neck, his tongue pulling small gasps from me. I ground my hips into his, when he rolled my nipple between his teeth. The hand around my waist slipped lower till it rested on my ass. He squeezed roughly, a small growl escaping his lips. I wrapped a leg around his waist, rocking my hips into his. With that, Daryl pulled away, tossing his crossbow from around his back, and pushed us down to the ground.

His mouth moved from my lips down to my neck as I worked on the buttons of his shirt. He grinded into me and I could feel his hardness pressing against me. "Pants off," I gasped in between breaths. In one swift movement Daryl had his pants off and my underwear. He rubbed his hard cock against my entrance, making me whine with want. He caught my lips with his as he entered me. I gasped as my body began to accompany him, but Daryl didn't move. I tried to rock my hips, but he just grabbed me and held me in place. I whined loudly, but he just smirked in response. "Dixon, if you don't fuck me right now I'm going to shove your beloved crossbow up your ass," I ground out. His smirk widened to a smug smile, "Magic word." I slammed my head back on the blankets in exasperation. I looked at him, knowing I looked pathetic with desire. "Please?" I practically whispered. With that he began to move, his thrusts increasing quickly. I pulled him down, kissing him deeply, my nails digging into his back as his pace quickened. I rocked my hips in time with his thrusts and I could feel my end coming. "Faster," I breathed out, and he listened, pounding into me relentlessly. I dragged my nails up his back, leaving red scratch marks; he growled in response and quickened his pace even more.

My orgasm hit me like a speeding car. I bit down on Daryl's shoulder to muffle my cries, digging my nails deep into his back. He grunted a few more times and froze in his movements, riding out his own. My body tingled with bliss as I fell back on the heap of blankets, Daryl on top of me. His body was heavy, but it was a comforting weight I didn't mind. We lay like that a few minutes, enjoying our come down. When Daryl looked up, his eyes were full of emotion. I just stared into his sea of blue, getting lost in them. He pulled a stray hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear. "Fucking gorgeous," he mumbled. I couldn't help the little blush that came at his words. Guys told me that before, but the way Daryl said it, the way he looked into my eyes and said it, made it feel like more than words. Again, the hunter surprised me as he tenderly kissed me. There was no tongue or hair pulling, just a simple, soft kiss. My heart fluttered in my chest as he pulled away. He got up and started dressing, but I just laid there and admired the man. His back was turned to me and I noticed the demon tattoos that sat on his right shoulder. _The demons he carries inside._ I smiled at how alike we were. Each tattoo I had was a reminder of the demons I carry. "You going to stare all day or get dressed?" he asked a small smile tugging at his lips. I rolled my eyes, forcing myself out of the pile of fluffiness. I dressed quickly and threw my long hair into a messy bun. I could feel his eyes on me and decided a little payback for the incident earlier was deserved. My back was turned to him, but once I finished pulling my hair up, I trailed my hands down slowly over my neck and down my sides. I looked back and saw his eyes glued to my hands. He was shifting uncomfortably, his face set in his usual scowl, but his eyes were hungry. I smirked and turned around, "You going to stare all day or are we going to do some work?" He shook his head and mumbled 'tease' as we stepped out of the tent. "You started it," I fired back with a smile.

Everybody was finishing their meals when we arrived. I immediately felt Shane's gaze on me, and the good mood I was in vanished. I looked for Carol and saw her folding some laundry. She didn't look as down as the past few days, and I knew that the flower had helped. I ate the small breakfast quickly, as Rick gathered everybody around the red truck. "Daryl and Aria found a farm house the other day. They think Sophia may have been holed up in there," Rick stated. "How do you know it was her and not somebody else?" Shane butted in, watching the two of us. "Place was only big enough to fit a small kid," Daryl defended. "It's our first lead. I want to go a little farther from where you two were yesterday, see if she found another place to stay." We all nodded, and Daryl stepped in, "I'm gonna borrow a horse and head up this ridge." I could see Rick's apprehension, but he didn't question it. Both Rick and I knew that he was a good hunter and that if we split up there would be more people out there to search. "I'd like to help," Jimmy said. I didn't even see the kid come up to us. I looked him over. He was a tall kid, but lanky. He didn't look very strong and his face still had those boyish features. It reminded me of Garth. "Is Hershel okay with this?" Rick questioned. Apparently the old man laid down some ground rules for us the other day, one of them being we couldn't carry our weapons on the farm. I wasn't happy with the decision, but it was his farm and he was nice enough to take us in.

"Yeah, yeah he said it was good," Jimmy replied casually. _Bullshit, kid lied right through his teeth. _I just shook my head as Rick agreed to let him help. "Aria you go with Shane check out the highway, and the woods a little. Maybe she made it back there or in that area," Rick said. My stomach dropped at the idea. I felt Daryl tense next to me. He knew something was going on. "I was actually thinking I could go off on my own," I said, hoping Rick would let me. "I don't want everybody off by themselves." _Fuck me. _"Yeah, that's fine," I said, holding back any of my discomfort at the idea. "Okay, let's head out." I never looked at Shane as I made my way over to the cars. I focused on preparing myself. I wasn't going to shut down like I did that night. I refused to show him I was weak. "Hey." I turned and saw Daryl stalking towards me. "You okay with this?" he asked, trying to hide his concern. "I'm fine," I said, putting on a fake smile. He watched me through his hooded eyes, trying to see if I was telling the truth. When he couldn't decide, he huffed in annoyance, turning to leave without another word. "Be careful." He gave a nod, "You too." With that we went our separate ways.

I waited by the pale green Hyundai, staring off into the open fields. The sky was a clear blue with no traces of the billowy clouds. The sun's rays beat down on me, warming my skin. I closed my eyes, lifting my head up to meet the sun's beams directly. It felt so wonderful to sit and enjoy the beautiful warmth.

_"Redford!" I turned to see the yellow VW bug parked in my driveway. The beige top was down and Brooke was kneeling in her seat, hanging out of the car door. I stood from the porch step, grabbing my beach bag and jumped over the car door, sliding flawlessly into the front seat. Brooke wrapped me in a bear hug, pulling away with a bright smile, her long blonde hair pulled into a sleek ponytail. "How's my favorite bitch today?" I popped my seatbelt on, turned the radio up, and looked back at my best friend. "Ready to get her tan on!" Brooke hit my shoulder playfully, "That a girl." She flipped the car into reverse and before taking off down my street, pumped her fists into the air, yelling, "To the beach!" _

I was lost in my memory when Shane banged on the hood of the car startling me. He wore his smug smile and I glared in response. I didn't say anything as I pulled myself into the front seat. He got in shortly after, and we started down the dirt drive towards the highway. My muscles were tight with anticipation. I knew Shane was going to try something, but I refused to be a victim. The drive was silent and Shane kept his focus on the road. I used the time to stare out the window, watching the dead landscape pass by in a blur. Daryl wandered into my thoughts and I hoped that he was safe. He was as invested as I was in this search and I worried that, like me, he would get himself into trouble. We pulled up to the traffic jammed highway, stepping out of the car cautiously. I walked over to Carol's car, checking the supplies for any signs of use. The food and drinks were untouched, meaning no Sophia. I looked into the woods, trying to think where I would go if I was all alone in the woods, running for my life. I would be in an abandoned farmhouse or up in a tree. But most of the trees in this area were too large for Sophia to get up. Not to mention, there wasn't houses in this area for miles. "You think she's still alive?" I whipped around facing the cop, "Yes, she's a smart kid." "I'm not saying she isn't, but if you don't find a missing person within the first twenty-four hours you're odds drop down to fifty percent, after seventy-two you're looking for a dead body." The words made my blood sizzle. _She wasn't dead. She can't be. _"So then why are you helping if you think it's a lost cause? Because everyone else back at camp thinks she's alive." "I never said I didn't want to help. I just don't think we're going to find her alive." I started pacing I was so pissed. "We're going to find her alive," I insisted.

He held his hand up in defense, I scoffed at his actions, jumping the guard rail and stalking into the woods. Shane didn't follow. His ankle was still healing and with his limp he would fall behind. I walked aimlessly, searching for fresh tracks, but ended up tracking her old ones. They were faint, making them hard to read. I followed her footsteps till they didn't show anymore and made my way back to the highway defeated. _Please let her be alive. She doesn't deserve to die so young. _Shane was leaned against the front of the car, shotgun resting on his lap as I hopped over the metal beam. Without a word we both got into the car and started towards the farm. I gazed out the window, my mind blank. The only sound in the enclosed vehicle was the humming of the engine. I snapped out of my gazing when Shane spoke up. "So you and Daryl had a good morning?" His words shocked me. My tent was far away from the rest of camp, and I thought we stayed pretty quiet. Shane caught a glimpse of the shock on my face, and he sat up a little straighter, pride radiating off him. "So you guys a thing now?" he asked smugly. "Fuck you," I spit out roughly. "I wish you would," he said, giving me a wink. I could feel the heat in my face, the rage making me clench my fists till they were ghost white.

"Why don't you go fuck your old girl, Lori? Oh, wait, her husband's back," I said snidely. The car came to an abrupt stop, slamming me against my seat-belt. "What the..." I yelled, but Shane was out of his seat, grabbing my wrists with one hand, pinning them to my lap, and wrapping his other hand around my throat, cutting me off. I tried struggling but he tightened his grip on my throat, closing off of my airways. His eyes were wild, and I was scared. I couldn't move with the way he pinned me, and that terrified me. Being useless like this completely unnerved me. "You know I think Merle was right about you. You don't just need a leash, you need a muzzle," his voice dripping with hostility. I just stared wide-eyed at the man. His grip loosened on my throat, letting me breathe normally, but with his hand still stationed I didn't move. He leaned forward, and I tried to move away only to have his grip tighten and hold me in place. His kiss was harsh, bruising my lips. He bit at my lower lip, but I refused to let him go any farther. He pulled away frustrated, the rage still pulsing in him.

He studied me and I focused on hiding my fear. I would not act weak. He released his hold my throat and I thought he was going to leave me alone, but instead he pulled my hands up, wrapped the seatbelt around them, and tied them above my head. Panic set in. I tried to move my hands, but they were secure. The binding was tight and my hands felt cold with numbness at the angle and tautness. He kept one hand on my arms, making sure I was rendered useless. I tried to move in some way, but the seatbelt across my lap kept me in place. His free hand slipped under my loose tank and I lost control of my fear. "Shane, please don't," I pleaded and hated the weakness in my voice. His hand continued up my stomach, towards my bra. I slammed my back into the seat, trying to stop him, but his hands slipped under my bra and gripped my breast roughly. _If anybody is listening, please help me! _

His hand was trailing back down my stomach, and the tears that I managed to keep at bay almost started. I closed my eyes, trying to block it all out, when the car rocked. The sound of a body hitting metal rang through the car, and outside my passenger window was a walker. It clawed pathetically at the glass window, mouth slobbering. Shane fell back in shock and all I could think was thank God. My seat belt came loose around my wrists, and I pulled myself free. Shane was still catching his breath when I smashed my fist into his face. I unbuckled myself from that belt of a snare, and pushed the passenger door open. The force knocked the walker back and I slammed my machete into its skull, almost splitting the face in two. I kicked the walker off my blade and shook the debris off. I got back in the car, facing Shane, my machete still out. "Try and touch me again. I fucking dare you and I will show you what torture really means." He stared wide-eyed, but nodded. I kept my machete out, resting it across my lap, "Drive," I commanded.

When we pulled up to the farm I jumped from the car before it was even in park. Rick, Andrea, and T-Dog were back from their search and saw Shane and I arrive. Rick was coming towards me, but I brushed past him and moved towards my tent. I almost ripped the flap open trying to get in, but once I did and zipped it back up, I sat in the center cross-legged. I focused on deleting the memories. Forcing them into little holes so deep they could never escape. I did it when _they_ died, when Dean went to Hell, when Sam jumped in the pit, and when I spent six months being tortured by Oriax. This was just another thing I would bury and move on. I stayed seated till I my hands stopped shaking with the combination of rage and fear I felt. When I felt composed enough I went back to the camp. The sun was starting to sink, but it was still early afternoon. I saw Glenn and Maggie coming down the road on their horses. I remembered Glenn's awed expression when she rode in and hit the walker attacking Andrea. The way he kept stealing glances at her when they rode up told me all I needed. I shook my head and made my way to the RV, looking to help out. The inside of the little home was all clean and organized and I was shocked. "Carol cleaned it the other day. Seems like a whole new place," Dale commented from the kitchen bench. I smiled at the comment, "Is she here?" I asked Dale. He shook his head, pointing towards the house, "Lori and her are inside making dinner to thank Hershel for his hospitality." "Thanks," I said, turning to leave.

"Aria, wait a moment," I closed my eyes, and gave a weak sigh before I turned and faced the old man. "Yeah?" "How are you doing?" _This is why I avoid them. _"I'm fine Dale. Trust me, this isn't the first time I've lost people and it won't be the last," I said exasperated. Dale seemed a bit taken aback at my comment, and I turned to leave again. "I appreciate you looking out for me, but I learned a long time ago that there is nothing you can do about it. Once they're gone, they're gone, and you can either let the grief and anger control you or you can deal with it. I just deal with it." I left with those words, leaving Dale to sit and ponder. I walked to the house, climbing the porch steps, and heard laughter flood through the screen door. I went in and admired the stunning home. I stepped into the brightly illuminated living room and could see the women bustling around, smiles on their faces. I walked shyly towards the women. I loved to cook, but the girl talk was something I wasn't too fond of. I couldn't even remember the last time I talked about girl things with another girl.

I stood in the entryway, quietly, watching everybody work, cutting and mixing. "Mind if I help out?" All four women stopped their tasks to look at me. "Of course," Beth chirped. The girl's features were soft, and she oozed innocence. I gave her a big smile, "Thanks, I...um...love cooking. I didn't get a chance to do it a lot before all this," I explained. Lori's shocked expression turned to one of a gentle mother. "Well what would you like to do?" When the boys and I would stop at Bobby's I always went out and picked up fresh ingredients and made us a homemade meal. They lived for those days. "Do you have peaches?" Patricia smiled, pointing towards the back door, "We just picked some the other day." My smile widened, "If you don't mind, I make a killer peach cobbler," I said with a smile on my face. The women gawked at the idea, shaking their heads happily. "Be my guest," Lori said.

I gathered all my supplies and got right to work. As I peeled the juicy peaches, I started rambling. "Sam and Dean lived for this. We didn't get a lot of home cooked meals, but whenever I got the chance, I always went all out." I was so engrossed in my actions that I didn't realize that the other women had stopped their conversations and were listening intently. "Sam was never a big sweets guy, but Dean. I swear that guy could eat an entire bakery empty. He loved pies, practically worshipped the food. So, the first time I made a homemade meal I made sure I baked him one. My mom taught me this amazing peach cobbler recipe and I decided to make it that night. One bite and Dean never ate anybody else's pie. Sam tried some and the two started fighting over it. I started making a pie for each of them after that." I was lost in my memory. The smile on Dean's face whenever we pulled into Bobby's for the weekend was priceless. He would just sit at the kitchen table and watch, always questioning. I eventually made him start cooking with me. Both Sam and I were stunned when we realized that Dean could actually cook.

"What happened to your mom?" Beth's shy voice asked. My knife slipped at the question, almost slicing my finger. I took a deep breath, barring off the memories. "She died a long time ago," I said in a whisper. The kitchen stayed quiet after that, the only sound was the blades hitting the cutting boards. One I got my pie in the oven I left the woman in charge of pulling it out. I was starting my way out of the house and was surprised that Carol followed me. I stood on the front porch watching the sky when she came next to me. "I wanted to thank you for going after my Sophia that day." "You can thank me when I bring her back," I said firmly. Her lips curved up at my words. Nothing was said after that, we just stood together lost in our own worlds. "Aria!" Rick called. He was over by the camp, waving me over. I left the porch silently, wondering what the sheriff wanted.

"What's up?" I asked when I reached him. We were close to camp, but far enough away that nobody could hear us talking. "Look, Shane told me what happened today." My stomach fell and I suddenly didn't feel well. "What did he tell you?" I asked frantically. Rick seemed confused at my reaction, "He told me that he made a comment about Sophia and then you punched him." _Of, course._ "Yeah, well he deserved it," I said all previous feelings dissipating. I didn't want people to know. These people were under enough stress already, they didn't need my problems on top of it. "Shane is hard-headed, but he means well." I scoffed at that. "Rick do you trust him?" I asked. His forehead creased in confusion, "Of course. Why do you ask?" I wanted to tell Rick that I thought he was dangerous. That he wasn't the same man who once knew.

"Walker!" Andrea yelled from atop the RV. Both Rick and I ran towards her, our conversation forgotten. "Is it just the one?" I asked, searching the fields. I saw a faint shadow emerging from the dense forest. "Yea, I can hit it from here," she said, excitement in her voice. "No, we don't want to alert others in the area," Rick said. Shane stepped in then, a baseball bat in hand, "I got it." "Shane, wait. Hershel said he wanted to deal with the walkers," Rick said, trying to stop him. "It's just the one we're fine," and then took off in a dead sprint. I didn't waste a second in following him and the others. My lungs burned for air as I pushed my legs to keep up with the cop. The closer we got to the form, the more I doubted it was a walker. There was a nagging feeling in my stomach. "Daryl?" I called out in alarm when we finally reached him. He was swaying on his feet and covered in filth. Rick's gun was still pointed at the hunter, as he slowly saw it was him. "That's the third time you've pointed that thing at my head. You gonna pull the trigger or what?" he asked breathlessly. Rick lowered his gun and I moved closer to check on him, when he collapsed. The gunshot pierced the silence and I remember the days in combat. The person would just collapse and then you would hear the sound ring in your ears. "No! No!" Rick yelled. I was already kneeled next to Daryl checking the wound. I was holding my breath the entire time, thinking the worse. When I brushed his shaggy hair away and saw that it was just a graze I breathed in relief. "I was kidding," he mumbled. Rick and I lifted him up, dragging him between us, and started towards the house.

"What the hell happened to him? Why is he wearing ears?" Glenn asked in alarm. I looked over the hunter and sure enough I saw four ears hanging from his neck. _His trophies. _Rick ripped it off and stuffed them in his shirt, "Let's keep that to ourselves," he mumbled. "Guys?" We all turned to see T-Dog holding a little doll. "Isn't this Sophia's?" he asked, and my heart soared. Another clue, she had to be close to where Daryl was. Andrea was running towards us, "Oh my god is he okay?" she asked in panic. "He would have been fine if you did what you were told and let us handle it," I barked back. Andrea's face sagged in guilt and everybody was giving me a disapproving look, but I didn't care. I almost lost another person I cared about because some fucking bimbo wanted to play hero.

Rick and I dragged Daryl's limp body to the house where everybody was swarming us asking what happened. I saw the old man standing at the top of the porch steps, "Bring him in here," he said leading us into the house and up the stairs. He led us into a spare bedroom, and we laid Daryl bed. He was starting to regain consciousness, but still wavered in and out. Patricia came in soon after handing Hershel a large black bag. I sat on the bed with Daryl, peeling his discolored wife beater from his sweat soaked body. He tried to fight against me, but his body was weak so he gave in. I knew he was self-conscious about his scars and I could see Rick and Shane starring. "Didn't your mother ever teach you it was rude to stare," I snapped. Both men dropped their gazes.

I rolled Daryl onto his side, trying to see how bad the wound in his side was. "You shoot yourself Dixon?" I mumbled. "Fell on my own arrow," he mumbled back. I shook my head, "Looks like it went through and through, nothing major damaged on the inside," I commented. Hershel watched me quizzically, and I could feel other eyes on me. When I was done looking over the arrow wound, I turned to Hershel. He handed me disinfectant and a needle and thread. I cleaned Daryl's wound thoroughly, stitching him up expertly, covering it in gauze. "Where did you learn all this?" Rick asked. I moved to Daryl's head, examining the graze. "I was in the military for two years serving as a combat medic." I looked up in time to see Shane's jaw drop slightly. I smiled smugly, "Didn't think little 'ol me could be a soldier, did you Shane?" The cop kept his mouth shut. "Why did you choose the military?" Rick asked curiously. He was eager to learn more about me, they all were. Daryl knew more than the others, but there were still a lot of secrets.

"Lots of reasons," I said nonchalantly. I would have left the answer at that, but something in me told me to open up. "Flunked out of high school and didn't have anywhere to go. So, I got my G.E.D the following year, and then joined the military." Daryl's breathing changed and I knew that he heard everything I said. "What did your parents think about that?" Hershel asked. "Didn't have an opinion they were dead". The room fell silent and I worked on stitching Daryl's gunshot wound. I knew what was coming next, _how did they die? _But that was all they would get from me. I wouldn't go any farther than that. Maybe because I still felt numb from losing Sam and Dean it was easier to just say they were gone or maybe, finally, I was starting to take my own advice and move on.

Instead of the men questioning more they stayed quiet, watching me work. "So, are you going to tell us how you did this?" I asked breaking the silence. Daryl grumbled something unintelligible while I wrapped his head in gauze. "What?" I asked not understanding a single word. "Damn horse got spooked. Bucked me off and I fell down a ridge." "Well if you asked me instead of just taking one of my horses I would have told you that Nelly spooks easily. That's why we named her nervous Nelly," Hershel commented. "Yeah, well if it's smart it left the country," he mumbled. "We're just glad you came back alive. We'll talk about Sophia tomorrow once you've gotten some rest," Rick said. Daryl nodded and Rick, Shane, and Hershel left, leaving me to take care of him. I sat with him, the noises from downstairs echoing up into the room. Daryl's eyes were heavy with exhaustion and I got up. "Where you going?" he asked quickly. I brushed a stray hair out of his eyes, "Supplies to clean you up." He watched me carefully, giving a tiny nod.

I went to the bathroom, gathering towels, and a bucket of water. When I entered the room again, Daryl was still awake, lost in his thoughts. He looked like a little boy, the way he was sprawled out on his side, arms curled close to his chest, and legs crossed at the ankles. The scene made me smile. I sat on the edge of the bed, the bucket of water by my feet. I dipped the white cloth into the water and washed his dirty face. His shoulders tensed at the contact, but eased with the soft and hypnotic movements. I worked from his face, down his neck, to his chest. The constant worry lines in his face eased away, as he relaxed more and more at my touch. When I was all done I pulled the covers up, and covered him. I set the bucket next to the door and plopped down in a cushioned rocking chair.

I stared out the window, watching some of the survivors bustle around. The sun was low and painted the sky in hues of orange, purple, and red. I watched the sun sink till the darkness that seeped from the forest enveloped the sky. I closed my eyes for second and slipped into a world of sleep.

**Daryl's POV**

_I shouldn't be alive. _My thoughts were obsessed with the events in the ridge. _He was just a hallucination, wasn't real. _But I couldn't shake the feeling that the man in the trench coat was.

'_Daryl, walkers are coming,' the man said. My mind was still fuzzy and I didn't understand. He grabbed my chin firmly, staring into me with a blue intensity. "Get up now," he commanded. His eyes were fierce and I felt my dizziness fade away. I came to my senses just in time to roll away from one of the two walkers attacking me. _

I looked over to Aria and saw she was peacefully asleep. One leg tucked under her and her head rested on her propped up arm. Her bun had fallen and little wisps of hair covered her soft features. She seemed so innocent while she slept. Looking at her now I never would imagine a girl like her doing time in the military, getting tortured, and killing walkers. I was amazed she answered Rick's questions. _Maybe she's starting to open up?_ I wanted to know more about her. All I knew were the basics and a few other deeper details, but that was it. My head ached and I decided not to dwell on everything. I watched the dark night, zoning out. There was a small knock on the door, and I turned to see Carol peek her head in.

"Mind if I come in?" she asked timidly. "Sure," I grunted, trying to pull the covers up over my scarred body. I kept my back to her, knowing she could see a few of the marks on my back. I didn't want pity from the others. The damage was already done and I didn't need the sympathy. "I brought you both some food," her soft voice said. I turned my head to get a look at the meal. It smelled wonderful and my stomach growled. "Thanks," I mumbled. "Aria made some peach cobbler, I can bring you some a little later if you would like?" My eyes shot to her sleeping form. _She cooks?_ "Yeah, that's fine," I said. She was definitely full of surprises. Carol left the plates on the bedside table and reached down, pressing her lips to my wrapped head. I couldn't help but flinch away, but when I realized what she wanted I let her. The gesture was sweet and it reminded me of my mom when she was alive.

I cleared my throat uncomfortably, not wanting to show her how much her gesture meant. Her silent steps started to move away. I turned to see her hand on the door, "You did more for my little girl today, than her daddy ever did for her in her whole life." "Didn't do anything Shane or Rick wouldn't have done," I mumbled. "I know. You're every bit as good as them," she looked over to Aria, "Both of you." With that she left, closing the door behind her. Carol's words made me feel more desperate to find Sophia. She believed that I would find her little girl and I would. I looked over to Aria. We would find Sophia together. We had to.


	17. Chapter 17

***I just wanted to thank everybody that is following this story. This is my first and every follower makes me super happy. I'm really glad you all like this story. If you have any suggestions or comments please feel free to voice them. Thank you again and enjoy!***

The first thing I felt when I woke up was the stiffness in my neck and the numbness in my leg. A yawn bellowed out of me and I rubbed my eyes of leftover sleep. "Mornin." Daryl was sitting up in bed, a plate of food in his lap. "Morning," I mumbled sleepily, standing to stretch. A light throw blanket slipped to my feet. I picked it up in confusion. "Carol came in and covered you up," he said seeing my confusion. I looked out the window and saw the mother doing dishes. "She also brought breakfast." I looked to the bed and saw Daryl holding a plate of food out for me. I sat on the end of the bed, facing Daryl, and ate the scrambled eggs and peaches. "Had your pie last night," he said nonchalantly. My lips curled in a smile, "And?" "Best damn pie I ever ate," he said munching on a juicy slice of peach. My smile grew with the comment. "Where did you learn to cook like that?" I stared at my plate, moving the food around aimlessly. I liked Daryl, like really like him. I wanted to open up to him, to tell him everything, but I was afraid. Afraid because I only told two other people about the real me.

The minutes passed in silence as I debated. Daryl waited patiently, studying me as I battled internally. _'You can't do this alone little sister. Let him in.'_ I wasn't startled when I heard his voice. I figured the only reason I kept hearing their voices was because I missed them so badly. Dean understood how hard it was to open up. But he was determined to not let me be closed up like he was. He pestered me nonstop till I finally got pissed enough that I would blow up, letting everything out. I continued to stare at my plate when I finally answered him. "My mom; she worked in a bakery till she had me, then quit to raise me." My gaze wandered from my plate of food towards the window. "I would come home from school and you could smell the aroma from the driveway. She always made sure that there was a treat waiting for me when I came home." A single tear slipped down my cheek. "Every day it was something different. Blueberry scones, snicker doodles, s'mores bars, you name it she baked it." A choked laugh made its way up and out of my chest, "She had an entire bookcase dedicated to baking; a recipe for every day of the year." I didn't realize more tears had slipped until Daryl's thumb brushed them away.

I looked at the man, laughing. I wiped my cheeks dry, giving him a wide smile. "Sorry, it's been a long time since I talked about her," I said, taking a deep breath to calm myself. It felt good to talk about it, and again I realized that maybe it was time to move on. _No, not yet. Not till he's paid for everything he has taken from me. _When I killed that demon I would move on, till then I would just deal like I have for the past decade or so. "Thank you," I said. "What for?" the hunter asked eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Being patient with me," I said thoughtfully. Daryl leaned forward for a kiss, but pulled back suddenly with a hiss of pain. I leaned forward instead, giving him an innocent kiss, before pulling away and checking his side. Hershel left his supplies in the room for when I needed them during the night. I pulled out fresh gauze from the black bag and unwrapped Daryl's wounds. There was spotting on his bandages, but otherwise the stitches were still intact. I re-wrapped the wounds on his side and put a smaller bandage on his head. "All set, Dixon," I said with a proud smile. "Good, gotta talk to Rick about the search and get back out there," he remarked, sitting up slowly with a pained expression. "There is no way in hell I'm letting you leave this farm." "Watch me. We gotta find that little girl," he argued. _Stubborn jackass. _Daryl was sitting upright in the bed. I was seated at the edge of the mattress and without any warning I jumped on his lap, pinning his wrists, and rendering him motionless.

Daryl started struggling, stopping immediately when his movements pulled at his stitches. "If I was a walker right now, you would be dead," I explained, releasing his wrists, but still straddling his lap. His face was set in an angry scowl while he looked up at me. I met his scowl with my own."I know you want to find her, so do I. But don't be fucking stupid," I said my scowl turning soft. Daryl didn't say anything. He knew I was right. We stayed like that for another minute before he finally spoke up. "You gonna get off of me or we staying like this all day?" he asked with a stony face. I shook my head, getting off of him, and lending him a hand. He groaned in pain as I helped pull him out of the bed.

We made it out to camp just as Rick and everybody started to gather around the red truck. Rick greeted us with a quick nod. "I wanted to do some gun training today before we head out to search for Sophia," the cop informed everyone. "Shane and I are taking anyone interested out into a clear part of the forest, far enough away from the farm, so we don't attract walkers." I understood what Rick was doing and I thought it was a good idea. People needed to know how to defend themselves, but we just found Sophia's doll. We had a lead and the cop was just putting it off. I looked up to Daryl and saw in his eyes the same distaste I felt. "We'd like to join," a shy Beth said, walking up to us with Patricia and Jimmy. "Is Hershel okay with this?" the sheriff asked. "Yes, you can ask him if you'd like," Beth answered in her soft voice. "I will if you don't mind," Rick commented before turning to me. "You said you were in the military?" I straightened up slightly, a habit I developed when I was questioned about my service. "Yeah. Why?" Rick gave Shane a quick look, "I would like it if you would help teach some of the group? Shane is a certified instructor, but I wanted more than one person with professional training to help give everyone pointers," Rick asked.

Everybody watched me quietly as I debated. I wanted to help this group, but my priority was finding Sophia. "Somebody needs to check out the ridge where Daryl was at yesterday. See if we can pick up any tracks," I said. "Shane was going to check out an abandoned suburb that's right by the edge of the forest after gun training. You can go with him if you'd like, but I don't want anybody going out alone after what happened yesterday," Rick explained in an authoritative voice. "I understand that, but I'm going whether you like it or not," I commented with a blank expression, my voice full of defiance. Everybody stared at me in surprise. They all followed Rick's commands like it was law, but I wouldn't. I trusted the man to do right by the group, to keep us safe, but I knew a lot more about survival than him. "Why because you think you're hot shit and you can do what you please?" Shane sneered. "Shane!" Rick yelled at his friend, but the deputy ignored him, staring me down with fire in his eyes. Daryl tensed next me, his fists clenching and jaw tightening. "No, but I promised Sophia that I would protect her and I plan on making good on that promise."

"Will you bring her back?" Carl's young voice asked from behind me. I turned around surprised. I didn't know that he was up and walking around again. His young face was hard, determined. He lost his best friend and all he wanted was for somebody to find her. "Yes," I replied with confidence in my voice. I was going to find her and prove Shane wrong, prove to myself that I could still save people, that I could still do the one thing I knew how to. Carl nodded, his eyes sparking in hope, "Dad, I think you should let her go." Shane was no longer fuming at me, but I could feel his glare. Rick looked at his son, seeing the hope in his eyes, something that was hard to find nowadays, and nodded his head. "I'm not okay with this is, but I have a feeling that no matter what I say you won't listen," his voice defeated. "You're right," I said and walked away in search of Hershel.

I found the old man in the barn grooming one the horses. The horse's coat was a silky brown with a flowing mane of dark chocolate hair. Hershel was brushing the animal when I showed up, a gentle hum coming from him. "What's her name?" I asked rubbing the horse's nose. "This is Nelly, showed up this morning waiting outside her stall," he said with pride. "Trained them well," I said. "What can I do for you?" he asked, knowing I wasn't looking for conversation. "I would like to borrow a horse if you wouldn't mind?" The stable was quiet; Hershel's stroke of the brush the only noise among the horse's gentle breathing. I feared the old man was going to say 'no'. The only way to make it to the ridge in time was by horse and I wasn't going to give up our only lead. "Please?" I pleaded. Hershel stopped his brushing, taking a deep breath, and looked to me. "Take Huey. He's in the last stall to the left," the old man said tiredly. "Thank you." I grabbed a saddle and reins and made my way to the stall. Huey was a large horse with a black coat and midnight dark hair. The animal watched me cautiously as I entered the stall. I rubbed his nose soothingly, our eyes locked to express trust.

I took horse riding lessons for a year when I was fourteen. It was a Christmas present from my grandmother who loved to ride. I remember going to my first lesson and being terrified. One of the girls in my freshman English class broke her femur after being bucked off. The horse stepped back and landed on her leg shattering the bone. The trainer spent twenty minutes reassuring me that I wasn't going to be bucked. I got over the fear and enjoyed riding but it wasn't my thing, so I gave it up after the year my grandmother paid for me. After the horse was tacked up, I lead him out of the stall. Hershel was putting Nelly away two stalls down. "Hershel, I wanted to thank you for taking our group in. I know that it wasn't an easy decision and I just wanted you to know that we all greatly appreciate it," my words full of gratitude. "Bring my horse back," Hershel replied before walking away. I didn't take his lack of response to heart. I hopped on Huey and headed off in the direction Daryl pointed.

The bright morning light filtered through the thick, green foliage above. Huey and I travelled peacefully, my senses sharp as I watched for danger. I brushed away low hanging branches the deeper we travelled, ducking when the branch was too large to move. The cicadas cried obnoxiously, their voices echoing in the dead woods.

"_You need to learn to walk like a predator, stalk like a predator, and be patient like a predator." _

I found a set of tracks and followed them. They were shaped like a horse's hoof and I knew I was following Daryl's path from the day before. Twigs snapped under Huey's hooves, the sound mingling with the cicadas. A minivan sized tree blocked our path and I guided Huey around it. We weaved between the thick trunks of the trees. The heat cloaked us like a wool blanket, making my body drip with sweat.

"_Monsters are predators. Don't ever underestimate your prey. Every creature has a mind of its own and knows how to use it."_

John Winchester taught me a lot about hunting. After what happened he told me what I wanted to know. My dad disagreed with it, so did Bobby. But after what I saw I wanted revenge. John told me basics, gave me a few self-defense lessons, but that was all. He left a couple of weeks after saving me, leaving me in the hands of a father I didn't know. Steve refused to teach me anything about the life. He left my mother and me for that reason, and even though I got dragged into it, he still objected. He dropped me off at Bobby's, telling me to finish high school. All he left me with was a few fake credit cards, a number to call him and an awkward hug and kiss good-bye. He would stop in every couple of weeks to check on me or would call after each hunt, but I hated him. I wanted to hunt. Like every hunter I was dragged into the life against my will and I wanted revenge.

Poor Bobby tried his best to help me. The man didn't have kids of his own, and all of sudden he got an emotionally disturbed and violent sixteen year old girl who was failing all her classes, ditching school, and falling down a deep hole of hatred that sucked any feeling out of her. I snuck into his liquor and would hide out in the junkyard, drinking till I was numb or passed out. Bobby nearly had a stroke the first time he found me. He would call Steve, telling my father to come back and care for me like a real parent would. My dad would show up a few days later, his face lined with his own grief. He would sit me down, talk to me about my grades, my drinking, and tell me that I needed to cope. His little pep talks always ended with us screaming at each other and him leaving to find the nearest bar.

Bobby tried to pull me out of my depression, but it took a long time for me to accept what happened. After failing out of high school, I called John and asked if he could train me. A few weeks later he showed up at Bobby's and began training me. During that time I learned to deal with my emotions. I learned how to bury all the memories. I made saving people my priority and finding the demon second. Bobby warned me about what John's obsession did to his family. He let it run his life and ended up raising two young boys in it. I wanted revenge, but I wanted to prevent other people from being forced into this life more. Bobby saw the change in me while I trained, and he decided to teach me about the supernatural. Steve found out about my training and got pissed. He yelled at John and Bobby saying they were not my parents and that they didn't get to decide what was good for me. I told him that Bobby and John were better fathers than he had been since the incident. That pulled my father into action. After a long talk, I spent one year training with Bobby and him. Then I went to the military because I felt that I needed better training. I needed to be a better shot, stronger, faster. I figured medical training would come in handy knowing all the hunters that showed up at Bobby's doorstep asking for medical help.

After my two years, I hunted with Steve. We worked well together, developing our relationship. I still felt like Bobby was more of a father to me, but Steve tried. He was a good man who wanted a family. He loved my mom and hated leaving her. He loved me. My mom sent him photos of me and copies of my grades to keep him updated. She never knew what he did, but she understood that whatever it was he was doing it was to keep us safe.

The tree line to my left started thinning out. It revealed a steep hill that ended at a tiny pond. I looked at the siding of the ridge, baffled. _How did he make it up this with an arrow in his side?_ The siding was full of loose roots and unsteady ground. It would be hard climbing without an injury. I moved Huey forward, searching around the ridge for tracks. When I found nothing I decided to keep heading north hoping to find a cabin or another farm-house. The search was quiet, until I went past the ridge.

There were five walkers wandering aimlessly till they smelled Huey and I. The human noses lifted in eagerness like a dog's nose when it catches an animal's scent. I heard the moaning and the uneven steps that dragged in the dirt. Huey began to back away, and my fear of being bucked off flooded my body. Huey sensed my instant fear and began to shuffle uneasily, rocking his head up and down with a loud whine. The walkers were moving quickly towards us, Huey's cries stirring their appetite. I shut down my fear and turned Huey away from the walkers, moving us into a sprint. Huey ran blindly, my surroundings becoming a blur. When I could no longer hear the walkers I slowed us to an easy trot.

I checked behind us and couldn't see any of the walkers. I had to kill them or else they could follow me back to the farm and endanger everyone. I got off the horse and tied his reins securely to a tree. I rubbed his nose to calm the spooked horse. I ran silently back towards the group of walkers. John's words about being the predator spun in my head. I focused on my breathing, my footing, and the world around me. I slowed my run to a jog, forming a plan. With Huey tied helplessly to the tree I hoped that I could break the pack down to smaller numbers. Give a whistle or throw a rock to catch the attention of a few while the others continued towards the horse. I was close enough to hear their moans again and decided the plan was good enough.

I crouched down to the ground, moving with stealth. My machete gripped tightly in my hands, as I searched the ground for a distraction. I was still far enough away that the undead hadn't picked up on my close by scent. I found a large stone and heaved it through the air and crashing into a tree. The noise ricocheted off the surrounding trees, and gained three of the walker's attention. Their uncoordinated feet shuffled towards me. I closed my eyes, focusing all my effort on my hearing. The steps grew closer and I could smell the decomposing body. _One...two...three...four...five._ I jumped out from behind the tree, shoving the metal blade between the eyes of a walker. I pulled it out abruptly, stepping over the lifeless form and kicking one of the dead's knees. The bone snapped and the walker fell slightly, allowing me time to spin around and slam the machete into the top of a brunette. I dropped the machete, bringing out my knife, and with all my force pushed the last walker into a tree, my knife jutting out from underneath his chin.

I retrieved my knife and machete and saw the two walkers, which originally walked away from the rock distraction, making their ways towards me. I threw my knife at one walker with incredible speed, the blade sinking into the head all the way to the hilt. The last one I walked up to quickly, driving the blade into the weak bone of the skull, right between the eyes. I wiped my blades clean of the blackish blood and hurried back towards Huey.

The horse stood by the tree, munching on the little grass growing at the trunk of the tree. I untied him and put my foot in the stirrup, pulling myself up on the saddle. The sun's bright rays dimmed to a soft light. The suffocating heat let up and a breeze caressed the dark green leaves. Blood covered my clothes and I knew Rick was going to go all big brothers on me. That was the man's nature. I passed the ridge once again and searched around a second time, hoping to find something I missed. I looked up into the hidden sky, "Cas, please help me; at least send me a sign telling me whether she is alive or not." I continued to watch the sky not ready to give up on the angel that I considered family. I sat for a few more minutes before stirring Huey to move on. "Whatever you're doing I hoped it's worth it," I mumbled. I could feel desperation sinking in. I needed to find Sophia and so far I was failing.

I returned Huey to his stall, untacking him, and giving him a good rub before heading towards the farm-house. I wanted to tell Hershel that Huey was back in his stall and compliment him on his training of the animal. I climbed the front steps and found a sullen Glenn. The Asian was aimlessly strumming nonsense on the guitar he found back at the highway. He was lost in a daze and I could see his internal battle from the way his brow furrowed heavily in thought. "Hey, Glenn what's got you down?" I asked with a friendly smile, moving to stand beside the seated man. He snapped of out his daze, looking at me startled. "N-Nothing's wrong," he stumbled out. I sighed, "You're a terrible liar." His skin paled at the comment, his brown eyes growing wide like watermelons. I put a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "Dude, chill out. You just look really bummed and you're not usually like that. I figured something was bothering you. Just trying to give you someone to talk to," I explained seeing his fear. His rigid body sunk back in the chair in defeat, arms still clutching the guitar. "I hate secrets. They're messy and people always get hurt," he said angrily.

I gave a nod so he knew I was listening. I couldn't really say anything. My whole life was a secret. A secret that was better left unspoken. "Sometimes secrets are needed to keep others safe." Glenn's big brown eyes were trained on me. "Yeah, but keeping something a secret can get people hurt too," he said, his voice expressing his inner dilemma. I didn't have any words of wisdom for him. I agreed with him, sometimes it benefited to tell the secret but it could also cause more damage. "Just go with your gut, Glenn. If you feel like it's something that needs to be in the open then go for it," I said trying to give him something. "Yeah, I guess," he mumbled in defeat. I didn't like seeing him in a slump.

"Do you play?" I asked motioning towards the guitar in his hands. "No," he replied halfheartedly. I smiled in excitement, "Hand it here," I said, reaching out for the instrument. "You play?" he asked in amazement. "I don't just play, I _love_ to play," I said grabbing the Gibson guitar. I sat in the chair next to Glenn, tuning it, and strumming a few chords to get the feeling back. "What can you play?" his voice oozing with excitement. "Almost anything, if I know the tune of the song I can probably play it," I said, relishing this moment. I gave up guitar after that night because it wasn't useful in my new life. I only played a handful of times over the past years. Sometimes after a hunt I would stop in a music store and play for an hour. Bobby dug one out of his basement for me when he found out, and I would play every so often when the brothers and I stayed there. "Mmm how about One Headlight by The Wallflowers?" he asked like a child asking for a second slice of cake.

I racked my brain for the tune, knowing it was on my iPod. I strummed a few strings till I got the rhythm that was playing in my head.

_So long ago, I don't remember when_

_That's when they say I lost my only friend_

_Well they said she died easy of a broken heart disease_

_As I listened through the cemetery trees_

_I seen the sun comin' up at the funeral at dawn_

_The long broken arm of human law_

_Now it always seemed such a waste_

_She always had a pretty face_

_So I wondered how she hung around this place_

My foot tapped against the white-painted floor-board, keeping time with the beat. My lips curled into a wide smile as I sang along to my favorite part of the song. I looked to Glenn and together we sang.

_Hey, come on try a little_

_Nothing is forever_

_There's got to be something better than _

_In the middle_

_But me & Cinderella_

_We put it all together_

_We can drive it home_

_With one headlight_

I continued playing the song when I heard the applause. I turned and saw the group standing around us. They're faces glowed with joy. I felt the blood rush to my cheeks, at the crowd. I wasn't big on playing in front of big crowds. I knew I could play well but I didn't think I was very good at singing. "Wow that was amazing!" Carl shouted his eyes wide with delight. "What else can you play?" he asked eagerly. "If I know the song I can play it," I said, waiting for a suggestion. "Bad Moon Rising By Creedence Clearwater Revival?" Dale asked. _I hope you boys are listening. _It was one of the songs that I designated as our 'we are in deep shit' song.

_I see the bad moon arising._

_I see trouble on the way._

_I see earthquakes and lightnin'._

_I see bad times today._

_Don't go around tonight,_

_Well, it's bound to take your life,_

_There's a bad moon on the rise._

_I hear hurricanes a blowing._

_I know the end is coming soon._

_I fear rivers over flowing._

_I hear the voice of rage and ruin._

_Don't go around tonight,_

_Well, it's bound to take your life,_

_There's a bad moon on the rise._

_All right!_

_Hope you got your things together._

_Hope you are quite prepared to die._

_Looks like we're in for nasty weather._

_One eye is taken for an eye._

I sat quietly, looking down at the ground as everyone whooped and cheered. My hands began to strum out the tune of a childhood song. My eyes closed, knowing the chords by heart.

_You are my sunshine, my only sunshine_

_You make me happy when skies are grey_

_You never know, dear, how much I love you_

_Please don't take my sunshine away_

_The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping_

_I dreamt I held you in my arms_

_When I awoke, dear, I was mistaken_

_So I hung my head, and I cried_

I heard my mother's honey sweet voice sing the song. I remembered her arms around me while I lay in bed at night. She would run her long fingers through my hair, singing softly in my ear.

_You are my sunshine, my only sunshine_

_You make me happy when skies are grey_

_You never know, dear, how much I love you_

_Please don't take my sunshine away_

_I'll always love you and make you happy_

_If you will only say the same_

_But if you leave me to love another,_

_You'll regret it all one day_

_You are my sunshine, my only sunshine_

_You make me happy when skies are grey_

_You never know, dear, how much I love you_

_Please don't take my sunshine away_

_Please don't take my sunshine away_

"Please don't take my sunshine away," I murmured one last time to myself. Every time I picked up the guitar I played that song. My mom told me, when I started, that I had to play that once a day for her, like she did for me every night I went to sleep. For as long as I could remember that was what my mom called me. The only time she said my name was if I was in trouble. When my siblings were born they got confused growing up because mom always called me sunshine instead of Aria. _"Ari, will you sing the song?" Bailey asked with her big brown eyes. "Sawng, sawng!" Trey wobbled in with a rattle in hand. Abby and Bailey ran up to me, clinging to my legs. "Please, Ari?" _My chest clenched and my throat tightened. Suddenly, it was hard to breath and I could feel the tears forming in my eyes. I couldn't cry in front of them. I didn't want them to see me weak. I took a deep breath, my fingers aimlessly strumming a random tune. When I felt more composed I looked up and saw Daryl. His blue eyes were on me, a look of admiration in his gaze. I saw Carol and she wiped away a few stray tears. Everybody seemed peaceful.

"And you were a bartender?" Glenn asked in disbelief, breaking the silence. I couldn't help but laugh at the statement myself. I handed the guitar back to Glenn, but he put his hands up against it. "I don't think so. You keep it, you're the one who knows how to play," he said. I loved the idea of having my own guitar, but I needed to be practical. I couldn't afford extra baggage. I kept the guitar, nodding thanks to Glenn. I would just store it in the RV and say I had no room in my tent. Everybody complimented me as they left to go back to their chores before my little concert. Daryl came up the steps standing across from me, leaning against the railing. "When did you start playing?" he asked. I leaned forward, resting my arms on my knees, "When I was six."

A cool breeze swept through the air, pulling loose a few strands of hair from my bun. I stared off into the grassy fields. The tall blades swayed with the gentle air listening to the music of nature. "What's with Shane and you?" Daryl asked bluntly. I picked at my nails, tearing at the short nail bed. "Nothing, guess he still holds a grudge against me from the CDC," I said carelessly. His eyes bore into me, but I kept my gaze lowered on my torn fingers. "You need to rest," I said finally looking up. He nodded slowly, looking away from me and out towards the fields. He looked lost in his thoughts as he moved away from the railing and towards the steps. I watched him go, but instead of going down the steps he turned back to me. He looked all around, but never directly at me. I was about to ask what was bothering him when he spoke up.

"Do you want to move your stuff into my tent?" he asked, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. It wasn't about sleeping together, but more about Daryl showing the others I was his girl. I couldn't help the smile that came, "Yeah." I could see the relief and excitement in his eyes, but he kept his expression neutral. "If you need help…" he started, but I cut him off. "Didn't I just say you needed to rest?" I said with authority. I stood from the chair, walking towards the hunter. I stood on my tiptoes, "Do as the doctor says," I whispered lowly into his ear, my fingers slipping under his shirt, playing with the button of his jeans. His hands gripped my waist, "Yes, ma'am."


	18. Chapter 18

***Hey! I'm glad I finally got his chapter up. Sorry it took so long. My schedule is crazy busy, but that should clear up in a week or two. I hope you enjoy and please review.***

_"Sophia!" The branches sliced at my skin drawing streaks of red. "Sophia!" I could hear the walkers getting closer. I ran through the crowded forest searching for the little girl. It was an endless maze of brown and greens, twisting and turning, and darkening to a fearsome black. "Sophia!" My lungs burned from the constant pull of air into my lungs. I wildly searched; panic, fear, and adrenaline consuming me. "Over here!" her young voice called to my right. The walkers behind me became visible through the light straining through the dense leaves above. My heart soared in relief as I ran towards her voice. I could see her blonde hair through the mass of dark colors around me like a light at the end of a tunnel. When I was close enough to see her face, she laughed with glee and took off running. "Come back!" I yelled after the girl. I followed her through the forest, the walkers chasing me, and the impending night consuming the forest. "Sophia, wait!" She disappeared through a mass of large bushes. I charged through them, my head whipping around for a glimpse of her as I broke through the other side. _

_ I stood at the edge of an open grass field. Sophia was nowhere in sight and I began moving across the field to find her. "Sophia!" I looked around me, the large bushes encircling the field creating a circle of peace. The white light of the moon shined down on the field illuminating it like a football field. I heard rustling to my right and I moved towards it, hoping to find the little girl. "Ari?" My movements halted at the voice behind me. I turned slowly, my mind spinning in emotion. The three of them stood hand in hand in the middle of the field; Abby in the middle with Bailey and Trey flanking her. Their young faces were blank of emotion. I stood in shock, my words stuck behind the lump in my throat. They watched me curiously, like they were studying me. I moved forward tentatively, afraid they weren't real and would disappear in an instant. They didn't move as I grew closer. _

_ When I was close enough to touch them, I fell to my knees in front of the three, my emotions consuming me. The tears slipped uncontrollably down my face, and I kneeled in front of them with a dumb smile on my face. I grasped Bailey and Trey's tiny hands in my blood soaked ones. "You're alive," I choked out, looking at each of my baby siblings. Abby stared at me blankly, "No we're not." "You killed us," Bailey stated with no emotion. The joy that consumed my heart crumbled at the words. "You promised you would always protect us," Trey added, those dark green eyes like mine staring into me. "I tried, I tried so hard to save you," I said with pleading eyes. "Why couldn't you save us Ari?" Bailey asked ripping her hand from mine. The loss of contact shocked me, and their blank faces were now set in anger and hurt. Sophia appeared out of nowhere, wrapping her hand with Bailey's. "Why did you leave me?" she asked with the same anger that filled my siblings. "I was trying to protect you," I explained desperately. "You promised all of us that you would protect us," Abby said. "You failed," Trey added, ripping his hand from mine, leaving me alone on the ground in front of them. _

_ "I'm sorry. Please, I tried, I tried. Please forgive me?" I pleaded with sobs. But I didn't get to hear their answers. The walkers that chased me before gripped my shoulders and slammed me into the ground. Their rotting teeth tore at my skin, spraying blood all over their mangled faces and my thrashing body. I screamed in pain, the walker's animalistic hands tearing my flesh open. I caught a glimpse of the children, but they just watched. _

I woke with a sudden gasp. My heart pounding loudly in my chest and the sound of rushing blood roared in my ears. I took a shaky breath, the nightmare still fresh in my mind. I was about to sit up when I noticed the arm around my waist. I turned my head slightly and saw Daryl peacefully asleep. The deep lines in his face were smoothed out and made him look young. The fear from my dream slipped away as his arm tightened around my waist, pulling me closer to his warm chest. "Nightmare?" he questioned in a sleepy mumble. I pushed myself back against his body, snuggling against him. "Yeah," I replied quietly. The morning sun was lightening the inside of the tent. We laid together in silence. I could feel the steady rise and fall of Daryl's chest against my back. I thought he was sleeping, and I tried to go back to sleep myself, but every time I shut my eyes, they would be there. I gave up and continued to stare at the wall of the tent. The sun's light grew stronger as the minutes passed and I knew some of the other survivors would be getting up soon.

I decided to get up and start some food. I grabbed Daryl's arm to lift it without waking him, but his grip tightened and I knew he wasn't asleep. I turned in his arms so that we came face to face. His eyes were closed when he mumbled, "Quit trying to move." I smiled, moving closer to him and resting my head against his chest. I loved this. The comfort I felt wrapped in his arms was wondrous. It was easy to forget about the shit world that waited for us outside of the tent. I traced random circles on his chest, lost in the moment. "What was your dream about?" the sleepiness gone from his voice. I could still remember the dream clearly, just like I remembered every nightmare that came to me every night. Their faces still clear as day in my mind. "Sophia," I said, not ready to talk about _them_ yet. Daryl's mood changed at the sound of the name. "I was chasing after her, but I could never get to her," I explained, remembering the dark forest. "We'll find her," he said with devotion. I nodded, continuing to draw circles on his muscular chest.

"What did you do before all this?" I asked. I knew his darkest demons, but nothing about his likes or dislikes. "A bit of everything. Worked at a garage mostly and did some construction jobs on the side," he said, his own hand drawing patterns into the small of my back. I imagined him under the hood of a car, a jumpsuit tied around his waist, oil streaks across his face, and that damn shop rag hanging from his back pocket. "Did you like the job?" I asked. "I was good at it. Got paid well enough and that was all that mattered to me." Dean crossed my mind. He loved cars like he loved beer and woman. I never met anybody who took such care of a car like he did. The Impala was everything to him and Sam. It was home and Dean made sure that he showed her just how much she meant to them. "Dean helped me take care of my mustang. I didn't know anything about cars, but Dean, that man was like a Steve Jobs of cars. He rebuilt their car after it got t-boned by a semi, looked brand new off the assembly line" "How did you meet them?" he asked curiously. "I knew their dad really well. He was like a father to me. Didn't know he had two boys till I ran into them at the bar I worked," I explained, my words partially true.

John was like a father to me, but after he trained me I never saw the man except maybe a handful of times. The guy only called me a few times and they were usually important things he needed help with. I hadn't been in the field long, but both John and Bobby said I was one of the best hunters they knew. So, when I finished a hunt in Pennsylvania and my phone read John Winchester calling I knew it was something big.

"_Winchester, long times no talk, how you doing old man?" I teased jokingly. "Hey kiddo, I need you to listen closely okay?" His tone was desperate and I could hear the tightness in his voice. "John, are you okay?" I asked worriedly. The man saved my life and I would forever be in his debt. Not just that but I looked up to him like a daughter would a father. "I'm not going to be here much longer. My time's up kid. I need you to promise me something." I was shocked at his words. John Winchester dying, it couldn't be possible. I shut down the pain, focusing on his last task for me. "Anything, sir." "I need you to look after my boys. You three are going to need each other. Don't let them do anything stupid and don't let this life consume them like it did me?" he asked, his voice cracking. "I promise," I paused, collecting myself, "I'm gonna miss you old man." "Miss you too kiddo...Good-bye." The line went dead, a steady hum of black noise buzzing in my ear as I wiped away a stray tear and went to find the Winchesters. _

We continued to lay in silence, our thoughts overtaking our minds. The gentle hum of zippers opening and closing hummed through the camp as the survivors slowly woke to start the day. Good mornings were called as the sleepy members trudged to the center of our makeshift camp. I didn't want to move. I wrapped a leg around Daryl's pulling us closer together. He responded by resting his chin on top of my head, his other hand stroking my hair soothingly. Not a single guy I had even been with did this. Daryl was fully content just holding me and talking. Now given, most of the guys I slept with were one night stands, but there were a couple of guys that I was with regularly; not once did they even attempt this with me. It wasn't until now that I realized how badly I wanted it. I craved it all those years and never knew until now. I needed comfort, and here was Daryl giving me everything I needed while he got everything he wanted in return...me. It was so ridiculously cliché, but was that so wrong? Did everything have to be complicated when it came to feelings? The unfamiliar swelling of joy whenever I saw him or the unbearable clenching in my chest when he got hurt was all signs of it. _L__ove. _Plain as ink on paper. But, I was afraid to say it. Afraid to even admit it because I was terrified I would lose him. I feared that he would be taken from me just like everyone I loved.

I was tired of the loss and the soul crushing pain. _Fuck my life. _I wanted to tell him, to let him know that I cared too, but my past made me so scared. "We should probably go out there," I said unwillingly, using the excuse as a way to escape my thoughts. He waited a minute before reluctantly pulling away from me. We dressed quietly, and I changed the dressing on his wounds. I unzipped the tent and was stepping out when Daryl caught my hand in his. I looked to him and somehow I knew that his thoughts were similar to mine this morning. He gave me soft kiss, his hand still wrapped in mine and his other in my hair. We pulled away, watching each other. I knew the joy I felt was there in my green eyes. We walked to camp side by side quietly. I nudged him playfully and I could see his lips twitching in a smile at my childish behavior. It was the way I acted when I was happy, truly happy.

The circle of survivors was silent with thought. Everybody looked lost in a daze. Most of the group was finishing up their food as Daryl and I grabbed ours. I made the hunter sit in the last lawn chair available, while I sat on the hard ground, my back against his legs. I caught Shane looking at us with distaste. I hardened my eyes at the cop, but he didn't back down. The only thing that broke our fierce contact was the worry that somebody would notice. I picked at the plate of eggs, eating slowly trying to make it last. I was munching on a forkful of food when Glenn stood, shifting awkwardly with his hands in his pockets. "So, guys, um, the barns full of walkers," he said uneasily. I choked on the food in my mouth. Everybody in camp was still as a statue. "What?" I asked still trying to comprehend his words. But Glenn didn't answer me, instead looking at the ground with mixed emotions. Shane stood abruptly, walking towards the barn with a look of rage on his features. We all followed quickly, Daryl and I armed with our weapons.

Shane reached the barn before us, standing in front of the large doors, peering in cautiously. The smell of fresh meat so close stirred the walkers and once we arrived we could hear them. "This isn't right man, we need to take care of this," Shane fumed. "No, this is Hershel's farm. He said he wanted to deal with the walkers," Rick tried. "Hershel doesn't see them as walkers; he sees them as sick people. That's his wife, son-in-law, and friends in there," Dale said. We all turned with incredulous looks on our faces as we faced Dale. "You knew about this?" Shane yelled, getting in the man's face. "Yes, since yesterday." "And you waited to tell us!" Shane bellowed. "I figured we made it this long without any problems what was one more night," Dale argued back. "Stop it, I will talk to Hershel. Try to reason with the man," Rick said trying to gain control of the situation. The former police officers stared each other down before Shane huffed with rage. "Whatever man," he said walking away. "Shane! Don't do anything till I talk to him," Rick warned. The deputy shook his head in frustration and made his way back to camp.

The others followed Rick back, but both Daryl and I lingered. I agreed with Shane. These things needed to be taken care of, but this was also the first time we found a place that seemed legitimately safe. I knew that if we did anything to this barn without Hershel's permission then he would kick us out. The man didn't owe us anything. He asked that we respect his rules and as long as we did he seemed okay to let us stay. But if we did this the old man wouldn't think twice about throwing us out. "What do you think?" I asked the hunter, our gazes fixed on the doors of the barn. "They're a threat," he said simply. I nodded with agreement, but as much of a threat as they were we had been safe all this time. The farmer was foolish for thinking that they were still human, but I think it was more that he couldn't accept this new reality. Truly, I think the man knows that they can't be helped, but if they can't be helped then what is left in this world?

We stood watching the barn for an hour before Shane and Rick showed up. Shane's body was tight with tension and his brown eyes held his hidden anger. "You guys head back to camp. We're going to check the barn make sure it's secure," Rick said. "You talk to Hershel?" Daryl asked. "Yeah, and I'm working on it," Rick replied with little hope. I sighed and walked away with Daryl trailing me. My mind felt exhausted. It never failed, the moment we felt safe a threat would arise. I liked the farm and the stability it brought to our chaotic lives, but I should know better than to think we would be safe for long. I sat in a worn lawn chair, laying my head back in fatigue. Daryl sat on a log, wiping his crossbow down with that red shop rag. We couldn't leave this farm, not until we found Sophia. I looked up, staring at the illuminated leaves above. The tree shimmered in vast shades of green. A cool breeze came through, shaking the sunbathing giant. _Almost time for fall. _The days weren't as warm and the nights grew colder. I sighed internally at the supplies we needed to gather for the colder months. There won't be much hunting and we all needed warmer clothes. _Got to talk to Rick about a supply run soon. _

I may not be the leader of this group, but I still felt like each one of them depended on me, like it was my job to protect and not Rick's. It's just the way I am. I was used to being the protector. Quick steps alerted me of someone's presence. I opened my eyes to find Rick walking towards Daryl and I. Shane was nowhere behind him and I figured the hot-headed cop stayed back to watch the barn like a hawk stalking its prey. "The barn looks secure but I want a twenty-four hour watch on it. Shane's going to take the first shift, and then Aria. You, Andrea, T-Dog, and I will go out after your shift and look for Sophia," he explained knowing exactly what I was thinking. I nodded in agreement. "You can take over for Shane in a couple of hours," Rick said before walking away to explain the orders to the rest of the group.

Daryl stood and walked away from the camp as soon as Rick left. I watched his sure steps as he moved towards the stable, his crossbow hanging in his hand. I shook my head with disappointment. _Moron is going to get himself killed. _I pulled myself out of the worn lawn chair with a heavy sigh and followed the hunter to the stable. He was unlocking Huey's door when I walked in. My arms were crossed over my chest as I quietly walked up to him. I leaned against the wooden stall, watching with disapproval. Daryl ignored my look and put Huey's reins on. The more I watched him act so carelessly the more pissed I got. "You're fucking stupid," I said with frustration. The hunter looked at me, his brow furrowed in confusion. "You want to find her, right?" "Yeah, but you have a hole in your side and a gunshot wound to the head," I yelled, "If you go out there I'm going to have to find two bodies instead of one." "I'm not gonna get myself killed, girl," he replied with his own aggravation. Daryl stepped out of the stall to grab the saddle, but I shoved him into the door. He looked at me with shock as his temper blew.

"What the fuck is your problem?" he asked incredulously. "My problem? You're going to get yourself killed and you don't give a fuck! I'm tired of losing people!" I fumed. His scowling face softened as he watched me through his squinted eyes. I wrapped my hands behind my head letting out a heavy breath. I paced back and forth letting the anger drain out of me. "I can't lose any more people," my words desperate. Daryl stayed quiet, watching me with his usual scowl. I wanted him to agree with me, to say that it was a stupid idea, but nothing. I shook my head and left the stable without another word. There was so much on my mind and I just needed to be alone. Daryl didn't follow me, but I knew he wouldn't take off like he planned.

I made my way towards the walker filled barn. I saw Lori talking to Shane. The two seemed pretty upset and I cursed myself. _Should have gone back to my tent. _I didn't want to deal with more drama. I passed the metal gate that sealed the barn off from the rest of the farm just as Lori turned away from Shane. Her steps were quick and she kept her gaze down as she passed me. I ignored it and made my way to the cop. He looked far away, his eyes unfocused, and locked on to some unknown object in the distance. I kept my distance from the man as I called out to him. "I'll take over now," I said simply, walking towards the broken down red tractor that sat with rust covered parts. He continued to stare before finally turning away and making his way back to camp. I sunk against the machine in relief. I hated that I feared being around the man.

I stared at the barn willing the thoughts away from my overwhelmed mind. My hair was down today and the easy breeze caught long strands of my waves, twirling them around aimlessly in the air. The blinding sun was warm as it beat down on my skin, raising tiny bumps as the cool breeze hit my heated body. I stayed like this till the sun's light dimmed slightly, basking the earth in an afternoon glow. I pushed myself off of the broken down tractor, stretching my arms up above my head and twisting my back till several cracks sounded. The moans of the undead sounded in the quiet air. The noise startled me because the barn had been quiet all day. But then I heard the survivors yelling. I saw Rick and Hershel enter the opened gate to the barn each with a walker being pushed in front of them with poles. To say I was shocked was an understatement. I immediately pulled my gun from my jeans and pointed it at the walker that Rick was struggling with.

"Aria, put it down," he growled trying to restrain the flailing corpse. I stared at the sheriff in disbelief. That's when everybody showed up. Everybody wore the same face of shock as we watched our leader hold the walker like it was a rabid dog on a leash. "Why do your people have guns?" Hershel asked in anger. The old man never got an answer because Shane snapped. "What the hell is this?" he yelled. "Shane, get out of the way and we can talk about this when we're done," Rick asked of his best friend. Daryl came up right beside me, shotgun aimed at the walker Rick was holding. I never took my eyes off of the two corpses. If either man slipped up a bullet would be planted in each walker's brain before the two could gasp in surprise. "No man, this is fucked up! They're not human!" he yelled pacing back in forth in front of the jerking corpses. "They're just sick!" Hershel yelled back.

Those words changed everything. Shane stopped his pacing, his Glock 19 in hand, that wild expression in his eyes seethed with an eerie calmness. "Tell me something Hershel; can a living, breathing person live this?" He fired four shots into the woman corpse that Hershel held. The bullets flew through her body exiting the other side. The old man watched in horror as Shane continued on. "She's still coming! There go her lungs, heart," he bellowed firing two shots each into her vital organs. "Shane, that's enough!" Rick screamed, his eyes pleading full of betrayal at his friends ignorance. "You're right man, that is enough," the deputy said with calm as he stalked forward and put a bullet in the walker's head. The body crumpled to the ground and the old man followed suit.

Shane paced back and forth in front of us ranting while Rick begged Hershel to take the walker. "These things ain't sick. They're not people. They're dead. I'm not gonna feel anything for them because all they do is kill! These things right here, they're the things that killed Amy. They killed Otis. They're gonna kill all of us." "Shane, stop it!" Rick screamed over and over. "Hell, if you think about it, in the cold light of day, we're pretty much dead already," he said with realization. He turned and ran towards the barn, beating on the doors, rousing all the walkers inside.

He grabbed an abandoned pick axe and pulled at the locks, ripping them from the wood. _We don't know how many are in there. _I turned and saw Carl's terrified face and Beth crying, screaming for Shane to stop. They were so young and I wasn't going to let their innocence be stripped away because some bat shit crazy cop wanted to kill a few zombies. I ran up to Shane, grabbing hold of the pick axe mid swing. We struggled for control, when he elbowed me in the face, making me stumble back. I felt a thick wetness drip down my nose, but ignored it as I grabbed Shane's arm. The only thing holding the barn doors shut at the moment was the chain and two by four that were wedged into the metal handles. The doors bowed out as the bodies pushed against it from the inside. Shane dropped the pick axe, nailing my gut with a breathtaking punch. I couldn't help but curl in on myself. I caught a glimpse of the wild, unhinged eyes of the cop before he shoved me away. I fell on the ground, arms wrapped tightly around my stomach.

"If we want to live, we got to fight for it! I'm talking about fighting for it right here, right now!" and he ran forward ripping the chains from the handles with a loud metallic rattle. Somebody's hand gripped my arm and hauled me to my feet. I turned and saw Daryl, his eyes cold like ice and burning with pure hatred. Shane pulled the board from the handles, and took several steps back. Suddenly, Andrea and T-Dog stepped up beside Daryl and me, their weapons aimed at the impending horde. I aimed my Beretta with the rest of them, pushing away the pain in my gut, and watched as walker after walker poured out of the barn. The gunfire rang in my ears as bullets flew into the dead's heads. There was a shot behind me, but I ignored it, my full attention on the monsters pouring out the barn. I lined my sight up perfectly, all my shots hitting the walkers in the brain. I pulled the trigger over and over taking as many of them as I could.

When the last walker sunk to the ground, I lowered my gun in grief. I could hear Hershel and his family sobbing with pain. They just watched their entire family being slaughtered and there was nothing they could do. Even if they were already dead, they thought they were alive. The wave of nausea that hit me was deafening. _I slaughtered their family. _My own nightmare came back to me; being pinned against the wall helpless as that monster drove that knife into their body's one at a time. My hands shook while my breathing became shallow. I refused to turn around to see their faces, to see that look of pain that I knew all too well. Shane stood with pride, the untamed look still haunting his brown eyes. I was ready to pound my fists into his face for the pain that he caused, but stopped when a gurgled growl came from the blackness of the barn.

We all stood, weapons ready, and waited for the lone walker to exit. I tightened my grip, my finger waiting patiently on the trigger. Little green shoes pulled a tiny body from the doors. The walker didn't have to look up for me to know. Everything inside crumbled. My stomach bottomed out leaving me empty. My mind screamed and screamed for my eyes to deceive me, but I knew what was slowly walking out of the wooden structure. _Sophia. _She looked up and it was like looking at Sam. It was the same face, but their eyes were gone, clouded and lifeless. I wanted to crumble to the floor. I wanted to scream into the blue sky and beg God why. I wanted to do every summoning spell possible to bring Cas to me, but instead I stood still. "Sophia! Sophia!" Carol screamed in between her sobs as she ran for her daughter. Daryl caught her just in time and the two fell next to me.

The mother cried for her child, and all I could feel was failure. I couldn't save her, couldn't protect her. I didn't deserve to be with these people, I didn't deserve to be with Daryl. I couldn't protect them. They would all die because of me. Sophia continued to come closer and I watched those clouded eyes. They looked like a hazy blue, all traces of her chocolate-brown gone. Nobody could move, all of us frozen in shock. I closed my eyes regretfully and moved forward void of anything. I had to do this. I couldn't bring her back, this was my fault and I had to fix it. My gun shook in my hand as I lifted it to her eye level. "I'm sorry," I croaked out in an airy whisper. My finger tightened on the trigger and I heard the piercing sound of the bullet leaving the chamber. I watched her young body fall to the ground and felt my soul die with her.

I couldn't move. My feet were cement bricks that forced me to stand and look at the pain I caused. Daryl helped Carol up, trying to keep her away from Sophia. She shoved him away and stormed off, her sobs chorusing through the air. There was a hand on my shoulder, but I didn't acknowledge it. The demons in me were clawing their way out of the dark holes I submerged them in. The pain, guilt, and failure I felt could fill hundreds of Olympic sized pools, hell it could probably drown the entire United States. The hand on my shoulder slid down my shaking arm, trying to pull me away but I wouldn't move. The hand continued to pull and there was a voice that was speaking softly to me, but it was drowned out by the screaming in my mind. _'You promised!' 'You said you would protect us!' 'You lied!' 'You failed!' _ The voices howled.

It hurt so much to know that this was to be my life; that I would have to live it alone in a world that was so cruel and already lonely. The pain was growing unbearable and I knew what I had to do. I feared the person I would become by doing it, but I couldn't handle this. I couldn't handle what just happened and what I had to do. I wouldn't be able to leave this group. I wouldn't be able to leave Daryl if I didn't turn it off. So, I did the one thing Dean asked me not to do, I shut down everything. I hit that little switch, that let you feel, off. The hand pulled at me again and this time I responded. I shoved the hand away and made a beeline for a still shocked Shane. The man didn't even see it coming. My fist connected with his nose sending rivulets of blood down his lips and chin. I balled my hand in his shirt to hold him in place and sent another punch into his face. My hand burned in pain, but I didn't feel anything. I knew that I wanted to make Shane feel as much pain as Hershel's family felt and that's all that mattered.

People were yelling but it was like white noise. Several sets of arms and hands grabbed me, pulling me from Shane. I didn't fight them although I wanted too, but I was thinking like a soldier. There would be too many to take on. I needed to conserve my energy and get him again later. Somebody was yelling at me, but I didn't catch it. I think it was Rick but it didn't really matter to me. As soon as the hands let me go I made my way back to the camp. I needed to pack and be gone before night. Everything was so chaotic now nobody would even know I was gone. I vaguely heard Hershel and Shane yelling at each other, but didn't bother. I was almost to my tent when he grabbed me. His touch wasn't gentle, but maybe I didn't want it to be. "Let me see your hand," Daryl's voice drawled out. I wouldn't look directly at him and I tried to move away, but he just moved in front of me, blocking my way each time. I showed him my hand, letting him turn it over and press into it. It hurt, but Daryl wouldn't know that. I didn't show any pain or flinch away when he pressed into the swollen wrist. I jammed it badly, but I would wrap it later tonight before I left.

He held my hand even after he was done. I stared down at our hands blankly. "I'm moving the tent away from camp," he stated emptily. I gave a nod, thinking about what I needed to pack. _'Don't do this A. Please, you belong here with these people,' _Sam's voice pleaded loudly in my mind. "I'm going to my tent," I said and pulled my hand out of his, leaving him behind. He didn't follow. I threw clothes into a black duffel and managed to fit a small blanket in while still leaving room for my ammo and guns. I still had Sam and Dean's guns, their knives, and the Demon knife. _Got to find a gun store. _I needed more ammo than what I had if I planned to survive on my own. Once my bag was packed I went to the RV to get a piece of paper. Daryl was a good man and I needed him to understand why this had to happen. He deserved a real answer, not some bullshit excuse. Carol was in the RV curled up in the kitchen nook, staring out the window numbly. She didn't even acknowledge me when I walked in so I just gathered what I needed. I took a seat at the table once I got my pen and paper. I stared out the window with her before finally speaking.

"It will always hurt. You will see her everywhere you go, you will hear her, and she will haunt your dreams. The nightmares will fade and the hallucinations will too, but the pain won't. You'll just stop noticing it. There will be moments when it consumes you and all you can do is hope it will go away as quickly as it came. You can shut it off or you can just deal with it, that's up to you." I stood up from my seat, and stopped once I opened the door. "I'm sorry I couldn't keep my promise to you or Sophia." Carol only continued to stare out the window, and I left. Daryl's tent was already gone and I saw him getting on his bike. I walked over to him and hopped on when he gave me a nod. We drove to the end of the farm, right up against the forest. I helped him pitch his tent and gather firewood. "I'm going hunting after we bury the bodies," he said. I was sitting on the bike, staring at the barn that took that last piece of me. "Okay," I said plainly. Those blue eyes bore into me, but there was nothing. He walked off after a bit and I watched his angel winged back till it was nothing but a blur. I got off the bike and opened his tent. I pulled the paper from my pocket and sat on his sleeping bag. I took my time writing it, making sure he understood why I was doing this. When I finished, I stood and left it folded up on his sleeping bag with his name written on it.

I didn't know when he would get it, but I hoped that he could forgive me. I left his tent without looking back and made my to my bag. Nobody was around and I took that as the perfect moment to slip away. I grabbed my bag from my tent and made my way towards the cars. I was looking at a tan Mercury Sable when I saw Hershel getting into his red Chevy. I decided to hitch a ride with the old man. He was obviously sneaking away and I figured we could help each other out. "Hey, mind if I catch a ride with you?" I asked. Hershel seemed startled, but he quickly caught on to the blank look I wore. "Not if you don't mind going to a bar?" he said sadly. "Could always use a drink old man," I said and jumped in the passenger seat.


	19. Chapter 19

***Hey, guys. This is another long chapter filled with lots. I know a lot of you are wondering about when Cas is going to show up and I promise he will show his wings soon. Reviews are nice and suggestions are always welcomed. Enjoy!***

**Daryl's POV**

My arms were covered in black dirt as I stormed out of the RV, letting the door slam on my way out. I spent the last two hours digging a grave for Sophia, and now Carol is refusing to give her daughter a last farewell. Everything bubbled inside me like a pot of boiling water. I was angry at the world for taking such an innocent child, angry that Shane attacked Aria, angry that I couldn't save Sophia. Finding her gave me a chance to prove myself to the others. It would also mean that if I could find that little girl I could still find Merle. But that didn't happen. She was bit and died alone in the woods.

I made my way towards the large oak that we first gathered at for Otis's funeral. We lined Sophia's grave with stones, making it stand out from the rest. I felt waves of hatred rush over me. I hated how I couldn't save her. I hated knowing that I let Carol down, let the whole group down, and let Aria down. Her cold face flashed in my mind sending a chill down my spine. She moved on autopilot, completely numb to everything around her. I looked at our small group and didn't see her flowing chocolate locks. My stomach twisted worriedly, but I brushed it aside. When the funeral ended, I walked right into the forest.

The trees oozed calmness, but I couldn't sink into the peacefulness they brought. The woods were where Sophia died. It still felt like home, but a home with a sick memory that I will always remember. I managed to kill two squirrels for the night even though I was careless in my hunting. My steps were loud and the storm inside me scared the critters away. The sun was barely hanging in the sky when I made it back to my camp. I didn't see Aria anywhere, but figured she was off in the woods killing something to release the pain. That worried feeling gripped me tightly before fluttering away like a leaf floating in the sky. I just finished gutting my kills when Lori came sauntering over.

I was mad at all of them. That was the point of me moving all the way out here. It was to get away from them. I tried to help Sophia and she died. I was tired of helping these people. I was better off on my own with Aria. She understood unlike the rest of them. "Daryl, Beth's in some catatonic shock. We need Hershel," Lori explained, her hands rubbing together nervously. "Yeah, so what?" I asked without concern. Lori was shocked at my tone. "So I need you to run into town real quick and bring him and Rick back," she said like it was obvious, her hands on her hips.

"You want him, go get him yourself. I got better things to do," I said callously. "What's the matter with you? Why would you be so selfish?" she questioned her eyes wide with disbelief. I jumped from my log, my eyes squinted in rage. "Selfish? I was out there looking for that little girl every single day. I took an arrow and a bullet in the process. You want those two idiots? Have a nice ride. I'm done looking for people." I sat back on my log my emotions still taut and coiled like a snake. I wasn't selfish. I did everything possible to try and find Sophia while everybody else sat with their thumbs up their ass. I wasn't going to risk myself for any more people.

Lori waited a few before leaving, hoping that I would change my mind, but I continued to pick at my cooked squirrel. When she left I sunk down to the ground, resting my back against the log. _Where is she?_ Aria's lack of presence was starting to eat at me. The light was fading fast plunging the earth into night. I wouldn't care about the others, but I would care about her. She was the only person who understood me. The only one I trusted to open up to. I always figured my life would be lonely. I never thought I would find somebody who would accept me and care for me. But I also never imagined I would find a girl like Aria; somebody who was smart, devoted, confident, brave, beautiful, and strong. It was rare for me to talk with others. I was always more of an observer, but I wanted to tell Aria everything. I wanted to know everything about her.

She was a rubix cube, a pain in the ass to solve, but the end result was worth it. I added a few more sticks to my dying fire as a harsh breeze swept through, rustling the leaves fiercely. Night arrived leaving only a faint baby blue light that was hesitant to follow daylight to bed. I grabbed a few sticks that were perfect for arrows, and began to sharpen them to a piercing point with the flickering of the fire as my only source of light. I fell into a smooth rhythm hoping that I would relax and zone out at the hypnotic motion, but my worrying and anger only festered as my mind was left to wander. I scraped viciously at the sticks releasing the pent-up anger that boiled in me. Being so close to the woods created a bubble of silence.

The steps were docile, coming rapidly through the long grass. Carol's thin frame stopped in front of me, her breathing heavy. "We can't find Lori, and the others aren't back yet." "Dumb bitch must have gone out looking for them," I muttered. "What?" she asked in disbelief. "Yeah, came out here earlier to see if I would go fetch them for her. I told her I was done being an errand boy." I was trying to get away from all this damn drama and here I was again being dragged into it. "And you didn't say anything?" Carol questioned disapprovingly, her tiny arms crossing over her chest. I kept my mouth shut, setting my new arrows aside and pushing the burnt logs of wood around with a makeshift poker. As much as I didn't want to care I did. I knew I fucked up not saying anything, but why did all of sudden I become everyone's protector? Carol sighed in aggravation and stomped away. She got a few feet before turning around and coming back to me.

"Aria came to see me today. She told me that I could either bury my grief or I could deal with it. I chose to deal with it. So, please, I'm asking you, don't do this? Don't let lose yourself. I've already lost my little girl," she said choking on the last part. My mind jumped quickly through her words. Aria talked to her? That meant she was still at camp, but why was she avoiding me? The confusion was quickly shoved away as I processed what Carol said. "That wasn't my problem," I snapped at her, walking towards my tent. I wanted her to go away, to leave me alone. She didn't understand what finding Sophia meant to me or what it meant to Aria. None of them did and nobody would comprehend the way we were grieving. I walked into my tent, shutting it quickly to show her I was done talking. I listened for her quiet steps, and relaxed when I heard them fading. I turned from the flap of my tent, taking in the small space. Aria didn't even bring her stuff here yet. _Wonder if she's staying in her tent?_ A small piece of white caught my eye as it glowed against the dark nylon. I grabbed the carefully folded piece of paper and made my way back outside.

I sat on the wooden log, twirling the note in my hands. My name was written in a curvy print which I immediately assumed was a girl's handwriting. That worried feeling invaded my body once again, but this time I didn't shove it away. _Why is there a note written for me?_ I didn't have to open the letter to know that it was from her. My mind raced with all kinds of words the note could hold. _Is it a suicide note? Was losing Sophia too much and she cracked?_ The fear clawed at my insides and I was terrified to read what was inside the folded paper. _Stop being a pussy and read it. _The little voice chimed. I took a deep breath and unfolded it.

_Daryl,_

_ I'm not going to sugar coat this because that's not the person I am. I'm leaving. Actually, by the time you read this I have already left. I'm not coming back, I can't. The things I shared are nothing compared to the secrets I still hold. Every person I loved or cared for has died in my arms, everybody. I thought I could save Sophia and I could prove to myself that fate was wrong, that I wasn't destined to spend the rest of my life alone, but it was wishful thinking. I'm so, so, so sorry to do this to you. Please know that everything in me is telling me to stay, but I won't lose you. I'm already breaking at the seams and I can't lose any more people, especially you. If I stay you will die and I refuse to let that happen. You are a special man Dixon. You managed to find a way into my heart, which is hard to do. I know that this won't be easy for you and it won't be easy for me, but don't they all say love is never easy? Yeah, I know you're freaking out because I used the L word. But, I mean it. I really do love you Daryl. I wish I had the chance to tell you in person. I wish I could explain everything right now to help you understand just how much you mean to me and how much this truly hurts. Please don't look for me. You won't find me. I know you're going to ignore this regardless what I ask, but you will only waste energy and manpower. All I want is for you to take care of yourself. Trust your instincts and don't let that shit head Shane give you problems. You're twice the man than any of them are. Please don't let this harden your heart. I know that it hurts, but I also know you will heal and find somebody that is better for you. Somebody who isn't so damaged. I'm so sorry it has to be like this. Good-bye Daryl. _

_ Love, _

_ Your Girl_

I couldn't breathe. The air was all gone and I was choking. I felt a single tear slip and I brushed it away angrily. I stood grabbing the dozen or so arrows I made and ripped them to splinters. I kicked at random things, knocking dirt into my fire, and throwing my beloved crossbow off somewhere. Her note was crumpled in my fist and I smoothed it out, reading it over again. "Stupid fucking bitch!" I hollered. I wanted to destroy everything. Why did everything I do get thrown back in my face? _Told you, all women are good for is fucking. There ain't no in between. _I laced my hands behind my head, pacing back and forth, my heated breath flying out of my flared nostrils. I was good to her. I put everything out there for her and she just leaves? She didn't even have the nerve to tell it to my face. _Didn't give me a chance to make her stay. _My pacing slowed at the thought. The anger subsided slowly as I felt the heartbreak. It was lung crushing. I felt like a two hundred pound football player had jumped on my chest. I fell back on the log, my arms on my knees and head in my hands. She said she loved me. How was this love? How was saying all of this in a note supposed to make it okay? I promised Dean before he died that I would take care of her. How could I let her walk away when I promised to take care of her?

'_Don't follow me.' _ Fuck that. She didn't get to say all that and leave me without giving me a chance to prove her wrong. I gave up too much to let her go without a fight. I found my crossbow thrown next to a nearby tree. I grabbed it and made my way back to camp. I was going to find her and show her how wrong she was. I was hurt and angry. She may have been tired of people dying on her, but I was tired of people leaving me. Merle left me over and over and now the only other person I cared about left. I wouldn't let it happen.

**Aria's POV**

The ride to the small town was a blur. The minute we started driving I zoned out, watching the empty land pass by in a rush. I pulled my hair up into a messy bun and pulled out an oversized thermal button up to put on. The day had grown increasingly chillier and it seemed that the days of little clothing were gone. Fall was days away and it was warning us. I rolled the large sleeves up to my elbows, but they sank down to the middle of my forearms. I sighed giving up on it. Hershel was in a daze as he drove; his soft blue eyes glassy with unshed tears. The drive took about thirty minutes. The town we arrived in was small. It had all the essential stores and the town bar. The streets were littered with glass, garbage, and other random items. I was amazed to see no walkers, but as soon as Hershel parked and we stepped out I had my machete in hand. We walked side by side as we made our way to the abandoned bar.

The old man paid no attention to anything and walked right into the building without checking it. I ran after Hershel and again surprised to find it empty of the living dead. I closed the door behind us and searched the rest of the place. I heard Hershel moving bottles around and the clinking of glasses. I made my sweep, checking all the closed doors and dark corners. When I made it back to the bar, I found Hershel seated with a bottle of whiskey. I grabbed a seat beside the man taking the amber colored liquid and pouring it into the spare glass. I downed the double shot and grimaced at the familiar burn. "I've been sober for twenty three years. Haven't touched a drop since the day Maggie was born," the old man said with sadness. "I give you credit. Don't think I could ever do that," I said thinking about the amount of times I've blacked out.

"There's no point now," he said with a long sigh, downing his drink and pouring another. I stared at the liquor covered shelves as Hershel continued. "There is no hope," his words heavy with defeat. I took his words in slowly. It wasn't wrong to think there was no more hope. As far as we knew the majority of the human population was wiped out and there was no cure. On top of that it's hard to believe things will ever get better when you know that in time everybody you love will die. My hope dried up when I hung from a meat hanger for several hours a day for six months straight as a demon tortured me. Hoping was pointless. You get to thinking it could really work, and then poof it's gone. Hershel was right. It was dangerous and in the end, it would kill you.

I don't know how long we sat passing the bottle between us. I had a good buzz and knew that I would have to hole up in the bar and wait till morning to leave. We kept quiet as we drank, each of us letting the alcohol soak up our pain. I was sipping at my double when the bar door opened. Hershel didn't move an inch, but I swirled around with my gun aimed at the new comers. I was surprised to see that it was Glenn and Rick and I could see from the shocked expressions they weren't expecting me here. I lowered my gun immediately, sliding it back into my waistband. I turned away from the two men and started sipping at my whiskey. "Aria, what are you doing here?" Glenn asked. I turned my seat to face the men, my glass still in hand. "Well, Hershel and I decided to visit an old friend," I said raising my glass and then downing my shot.

Rick looked pissed, but I could care less. "Wipe the angry face off, sheriff," I commented, pouring another shot. Rick's eyes glowered in my direction and I considered flipping the man off. "Did Maggie send you?" Hershel questioned his eyes trained ahead at the wall. "Beth needs you. She's in some sort of catatonic state, probably from shock. I think you are too," Rick tried. _Ding, ding, ding, cops got a brain. _"She's got Maggie," he commented, bringing the glass to his lips and downing it in one gulp. Rick shook his head, stepping up to the man, "She needs you." Hershel shook his head slowly, his eyes trained on the empty glass twirling in his hands. "What could I do? I failed my girls. I should have let her mourn her mother's death weeks ago. I robbed them of that, and I see that now." Rick looked to me as Hershel's voice cracked. He was pleading with me to help him, but I couldn't. I was supposed to be long gone by now.

I grabbed the amber liquid and poured myself another shot, ignoring Rick. "You can't blame yourself for having hope of a cure," Rick tried reasoning. I almost snorted at the comment. Hershel and I just talked about this. Hope was dangerous. It was an evil thing that hurt everyone it touched. "Hope," the old man scoffed. "When you showed up at my door with your boy in your arms I had little hope he would survive." "But he did," Rick retorted, gripping Hershel's shoulder. "You're right. We lost Otis, but your friend Shane made it back and he survived. It was a miracle. A miracle that made me realize they do exist," Hershel explained fiercely, his drunken eyes glassy. "Only it was a sham. I was a fool Rick, and my daughters deserve better than that." I swished the brown liquor around the glass. I felt the same. It was stupid to believe I could have somewhat of a relationship. It was stupid to think I could even protect these people when I was falling to pieces inside.

Rick was frustrated. I could see it in his hardened blue eyes. Hershel grabbed the bottle and topped himself off. Glenn stood at the front door, checking the outside. Rick went over to him and they spoke quietly. I could hear them from my seat at the bar. "Should we just wait till he passes out?" Glenn asked. I snorted at the comment, gaining the two men's attention. "Don't you guys get it?" I said harshly, turning in my seat to face them. "We're not leaving. Just go," I commanded dismissively. Rick's jaw set in a frown as he walked towards us. "So what's the plan then? Drink yourselves to death? Leave everyone you love. Leave your family alone?" I just stared at the man blankly, my emotions still turned off. Hershel stood quickly, the wooden stool scraping loudly against the hard wood floors. "Don't tell me how to run my family, or my farm! You people are the plague. I did the Christian thing and let you people in. I gave you shelter and you destroyed everything!" he yelled, swaying a little on his tipsy feet. Rick brushed the accusation off, getting up in the man's personal space. "The world was in bad shape when we met." The old man said nothing, watching Rick carefully before walking back to the bar and taking a seat next to me, pouring another shot.

I admired Rick's persistence as he strolled up to Hershel, grabbing his elbow, "Come on, your girls need you," he pleaded, pulling on the man's arm. Hershel yanked away, "I didn't want to believe you when you said there was no cure. But, but when Shane shot Lou in the chest that's when I knew. I knew that my Anet was dead and I was feeding her rotting corpse. That's when I knew there was no hope," Hershel's words slurred with alcohol and grief.

It was silent before I spoke up. "There's nothing left Rick. No hope, no happy ending. When Sophia walked out of that barn that was it," I said plainly. "There is no hope for any of us." I said finishing my last drink. I slid off my bar seat, making my way towards the door when Rick stepped in front of me. "How can you say that? Nothing's changed. Death is still death whether it's from a walker bite or a heart attack. What's the difference? You didn't think it was hopeless before did you?" He asked, searching my dead green eyes. He made a point. How was this different from anything else in my past life? Honestly it wasn't. It was just another job, but this time the monster won. Yet, it was still different because I couldn't handle it. "It doesn't matter whether we believe, but there are people back home who are depending on us to give them something, even if it's just a reason to live. It's not about us, it's about them" "Then you should go back. Take care of those people, but I'm leaving," I said trying to move around Rick. He grabbed my arm, stopping me, "Why?" he asked with a mixture of curiosity and hurt masking his face.

I didn't get a chance to answer because the bar doors opened and in walked two men. We all froze in our movements, watching one another. "Son of a bitch, they're alive." My hand automatically went to rest on my gun at my back. Rick tensed next to me and I knew his hand was also waiting on his Python. The men took a step forward and I couldn't help but pull at the gun, preparing to shoot. The men noticed stopping, and raising their hands in surrender. "We're not here to hurt you. Just hoping to grab a much-needed drink," the lean one said. He was about Rick's height, with dark brown hair that was greasy from being unwashed. There was dark stubble covering his lower face like a beard. The man was wearing a sleeveless tee with a great white shark on it and the word_ Strafford Sharks_ written in yellow. The other man was larger; obese in weight with a dingy white shirt that was stained in sweat and blood. He wore a French looking hat and had dark stubble. The large man also wore a shotgun strapped across his chest.

Rick considered the two men, eventually letting go of his gun. "Why not?" he said and grabbed a few shot glasses. I stepped back leaving the men a wide berth to sit. The larger man took a seat at the bar, while the lean one sat at a table. Hershel stayed seated in his original seat, and Glenn was standing behind the bar, his shotgun resting on top of it. I leaned against the bar, next to Glenn, while Rick poured a shot of whiskey for the strangers. The lean man took his seat introducing himself, "I'm Dave, and that toothpick over there is Tony," pointing to the obese man. "I think you mean yourself," Tony said with a laugh. Rick's shoulders were a bit more relaxed with the humor between the two strange men. "We met on the highway coming out of Philly," Dave said, with his slight accent. "Damn shit hole that was," he commented grabbing the shot and downing it.

"I'm Glenn," he introduced with a smile. "It's nice to meet some new people," he said genuinely. Rick grabbed one of the shot glasses, handing it over to Glenn before introducing himself. "Rick Grimes," he said. The buzz I had was vanishing quickly. The two men made me feel uneasy. It was the way they dressed and how they looked. It didn't seem like the two of them were alone. I guarantee they were with a larger group and that only wound my stomach more tightly. This world brought out the worst in people. But, I was also trained not to trust anybody. You never knew if it was the thing you were hunting. Rick distributed a shot glass to everyone except Hershel and I, knowing that we both had drunk enough. Dave noticed, pointing out Hershel and me. "No evening drinks for you two?" he asked raising his glass. "I just quit," Hershel replied plainly. "Unique sense of timing my friend," Dave replied before taking a sip of his amber liquor. "This is Hershel," Rick introduced, "He lost people today." I watched the two men carefully, trying to figure them out. The way Rick was acting so carefree around the men made me angry.

These people were so used to the old world that they forgot walkers are not the only danger. The two men were silent, their faces downcast with sorrow. "I'm truly sorry to hear that," Dave said with remorse. "To better days, new friends, and the dead, may they be in a better place," Dave toasted, raising his glass in the air, and downing it. Everybody toasted also, taking their shot. Dave slammed the shot down on the wooden table before looking over to me. "What's your name, sweetheart?" he asked with a quick glance of my body. I ignored the man's question, glaring at him with my empty, dark, eyes. The man squirmed slightly under my gaze, turning to Rick to for an answer to his question. "This is Aria," Rick introduced.

Dave leaned forward, across the table, extending his hand out to me. "Nice to meet you." I just glared at his hand, and he slowly withdrew it. Rick was staring at the man's waist, and Dave noticed, quickly pulling out a small black gun. My hand went to my waist where my very own gun was stashed. "You like it?" Dave asked, twirling it around before slipping it back in his pants. "Got it off a cop," he commented. "I'm a cop," Rick said, watching the man closely. "Well, this cop was dead when I got it," he said nonchalantly.

I looked over to Tony, catching him staring at me. He realized he was caught, but instead of looking away quickly, he flashed me a smile. "How did you guys end up here? Georgia's a long way from Philadelphia," Rick asked, sitting sideways on the chair. "Just making our way down the rumor mill; travelling down to one dead-end after another searching for a safe haven," Dave replied. "Nebraska is the newest rumor," Tony said, his gaze traveling away from me to the other men. "Nebraska?" Glenn asked with a confused expression, "There's nothing there." "Yeah, low population and lots of guns," Tony said waggling his eyebrows. "They call them fly over states for a reason, kid," Dave replied, turning his attention to Rick. "So, what about you guys?" he asked nonchalantly. "Eventually Fort Benning," Rick replied looking down into his empty glass. "Well, I'm sorry to tell you this, but Fort Benning is done for," he replied. Everybody's shoulders dropped in disappointment. "Really?" Glenn questioned with disbelief. "Yep," he replied. Rick's head slumped in defeat. I wasn't sure whether Hershel was still going to let them stay at the farm after today, and now knowing that Fort Benning was gone, Rick didn't have anywhere to go.

"So, where you guys holed up at? Doesn't look like it's here," Dave said. I tensed at the question. These guys were not here to just be friendly. Nobody in this world was like that anymore. "It's none of your business," I snapped. I may be leaving Rick's group, but there was no way I was going to leave them in danger. "Whoa there tiger! I was just asking, no need to get feisty," Dave said with his hands raised in defense. He gave me a wink at the last part, and it took everything in me not to latch my hands around the man's throat. "Yeah, easy there sweet cheeks," Tony commented, walking towards me. He walked by with a sly smile before reaching the wall, and taking a piss on the floor. The friendly atmosphere disintegrated and replaced with a thick uneasiness. "I think it's time we start heading back to our group," I said, watching Dave closely. I pushed off from the bar and started walking towards the door. Rick and everybody followed when Dave jumped up in front of me.

"Come on, we were just getting to know each other. How about another drink?" He asked stepping closer to me. "We're leaving," I ground out, glaring the man down. Dave ignored my comment, leaning down to whisper in my ear. My muscles grew tight at the unwelcome proximity of the stranger. "We could have some fun you and me," he whispered. I expected the man to pull away from me with a smug smile, but what I didn't expect was for him to spin me around, his arm gripping my throat and his gun pressed to my head. I thrashed against his hold, as Rick and Glenn drew on Dave. Tony aimed the shotgun at the guys from his spot at the wall. "Let her go," Rick commanded, his gun pointed right at Dave's head. I gripped his arm, digging my short nails into his flesh, hoping he would loosen his hold so I could slip out. Dave pressed the barrel of the gun closer to my head, letting the metal dig into my scalp.

"I don't think so. It's been awhile since me and the boys at camp have had a girl," he replied with a dark laugh. _No way in hell I'm letting this shithead take me. _I would die before I let these two take me to a gang rape. I gripped Dave's arm around my throat, and threw all my weight down, rearing my butt against his stomach. The sudden move surprised him, and his arm slipped away from my throat. As soon as he released me I pulled my gun, but before I could turn to shoot, both men were shot down. I looked up to see Rick, his gun still aimed. I sighed in relief as I noticed Tony lying against the wall with a gunshot wound to his chest. I stood, locking eyes with Rick as a sign of thanks. He nodded in reply and turned towards Tony. He shot the dead man in the head, and we watched in confusion and unease. _Why would you shoot a body that was already dead? _

I didn't get to wonder for long though. The shots fired were sure to draw walkers and we needed to get out of here as soon as possible. "You guys need to go. Walkers are going to show up soon and everybody at the farm is probably freaking out now," I said, slipping my gun into the band of my jeans. "You're not coming with?" Glenn asked his face still pale from the earlier events. "Quit asking questions and go," I barked back. Glenn jumped slightly from my sudden outburst, but I didn't care. Emotionless I was mean and unpredictable. A low rumble of a truck engine sounded from outside, along with a chorus of car doors being slammed shut. The four of us all looked at each other with wide eyes before scurrying towards the door, crouching under the covered windows. "Did you hear that?" the voices from outside questioned. "Look for Dave and Tony," one of them said. _Fuck. _Rick and I were on one side of the doubles doors, Hershel and Glenn on the other. We all looked at each other with that look of '_what now?'_ Shadows crossed behind the windows and I gripped my gun tightly.

The shadows passed, unaware of the people in the bar, and I eased my grip, relaxing against the hard wall. A few minutes passed as we waited eagerly for the group outside to leave. The air was still and heavy with nervous energy. You would almost think that the men searching for their comrades had taken off. A few shadows came sauntering over. The man's breathing was breathless as he spoke. "We can't find them anywhere." "Shit!" one muttered loudly. "Did anyone check the bar?" There was a grunt of annoyance as one of the men spoke up angrily. "Jesus, its Dave and Tony we're talking about." I listened to their hurried footsteps, pulling my gun from my jeans, and checking the ammo before taking the safety off. Rick followed suit and we both shared a look, understanding what needed to be done. If we were to escape from this bar we would need to do whatever was necessary. The black shadows glowed evilly in the moonlight as they stood right outside the bar doors. The old knob turned with a squeak and the heavy wooden door opened slightly. Without hesitation, Glenn threw himself against the door, slamming it shut against the men.

"What the hell?" the man outside asked in surprise. "Somebody just shut the damn door." Glenn's chest was falling up and down rapidly, his face drowning in anxiety. The men outside were lethal that was for sure. I thought about each voice that spoke, trying to figure out how many men were out there. "Hey, we know somebody's in there. We're looking for people, can you help us out?" the man asked with sincerity. Rick looked to me, his uncertainties written plain as day on his worn face. His eyes moved from me back to the door several times. I shook my head, hoping that if we didn't answer the men, they would just leave. "Let's just go in there," one voice said. "No," another replied. "Hey, we're just looking for our friends. If something happened tell us," the man pleaded with agitation. Rick looked at the two dead men, his eyes flickering between them as the man spoke.

"Nobody's in there dude," a deeper voice said. "Somebody pushed that door shut," the man defended. I put the total number of guys to five. "They attacked us," Rick yelled out. I stared at the cop with rage. We could have found another way out without getting involved with these people. I caught the old man shaking his head with a frown of disapproval. Glenn's face was no longer anxious but extremely panicked. This was a fucked situation and it was going to end with more bloodshed. _I __should have never stayed with Hershel. Never would have happened if I had just taken off. Now somebody's going to get hurt because of me. _"Are Dave and Tony in there? They alive?" the man asked. Rick looked at our faces of disapproval, his own face falling as he realized how wrong he was. I admired the man for sticking to his values; for trying to talk things out first before resorting to violence. But the thing is that world was gone. Those values don't exist anymore. If you want to live in this world you have to be cruel because it's either you or that person standing in your way of survival.

"No," Rick called out. "Fuck this man, let's go." "No, I'm not going back to tell AJ that Dave and Tony got killed by some asshole in a bar," the man shot back. "Your men attacked us!" Rick defended, "We had no choice!" The cop took a second to collect himself, trying to plead his case. "I'm sure we've all lost people, done things we wish we hadn't, but that's the way it is now." "So, let's just leave it to wrong place wrong-" Rick's words cut off as the glass shattered, bullets flying above our heads. The bullets were coming to close to Glenn and Hershel. I looked over at the two, "Run, when I say so! We'll cover you!" I shouted over the gunfire. The men all nodded and I counted out to three on my fingers. "Go!" Rick and I popped up from our spot at the wall and fired out of the shattered window. Bullets broke through every weak spot of the exterior, zipping through the inside, destroying bottles of booze. Hershel and Glenn ran with their heads down, the deadly shots missing them by mere inches. I fired off my entire clip before dropping to the ground with Rick beside me.

I grabbed a spare clip from my boot, loading my gun as it became quiet. Our rapid breathing the only sound heard in the silence. The sound of falling boxes from deep within the bar echoed out. I wanted to slam my head against the wall till I was thinking clearly. _Fucking alcohol. _Of course they would come in through the back. Glenn and Hershel gave us panicked looks. Rick nodded his head off in that direction, telling Glenn to check it out. The young man's face was dripping in sweat and his large brown eyes were wild with fear. Glenn got up reluctantly and I followed. Rick and Hershel could cover the front. Glenn needed back up. He was practically scared of his own shadow. I'm not saying he's a coward, no; he's one of the bravest members of the group I think. The kid always went into the city, risking his life every time for supplies to help us.

I moved quickly up behind him, gripping his arm, and pushing him behind me. Whoever was in there, if they attacked I would rather it be me than Glenn. I opened the door slowly, trying to keep the old thing from squeaking on its hinges. The room was as black as a bat cave. A pale white light was hardly visible through the back door window that was covered in dust. I cautiously moved down the steps, the boards crying out in the stillness. I cringed at the horrid noise it made, knowing that the element of surprise was gone. Glenn stayed close behind, his breathing rapid from the rush of adrenaline in his veins. I held my gun out ready to fire, while my eyes tried to adjust to the blackness. My senses were still dulled from the whiskey, and I missed the figure charging out of the darkness. The man hit me full force, knocking me to the ground and taking my breath at the same moment. The massive man got a hit on me before I punched him back. He fell back from the blow and I was up, unsheathing my knife and stabbing the man in the heart. He gasped in agony as his last breath left his lungs. Glenn ran up to me, gripping my arm, "Are you okay?" "Fine," I mumbled back, rubbing my chin. I looked around the ground finding my gun a few feet from the man's body.

A jiggling of a doorknob sounded out along with two faint voices. Glenn fired his shotgun, the glass on the door crashing to the ground in pieces. "Glenn, Aria!" I heard Rick yell. Glenn was shaking as I gripped him by the arm and pulled him off to the side out of door's sights. "We're fine!" Glenn yelled back shakily. Glenn and I kept our eyes on the door; gun's cocked and ready for any movement. I heard light footsteps behind me, turning towards the intruder with my gun aimed. Hershel jumped back slightly, an angry scowl on his face. I shook my head and turned my gaze back on the door. "Rick wants you to try for the car," Hershel explained to Glenn. "I can't do that," Glenn protested. I faced him grabbing his shoulder more roughly than I intended. "You can do this. You're fast, Glenn. Move quickly and don't hesitate. We'll cover you." The Asian still rolled his eyes, but relaxed a little bit. Hershel and I flanked each door, checking the perimeter before sending Glenn out.

"Remember move quick," I said as he checked both ways, slowly inching out into the open. Behind the bar was an alleyway, one end opening up to the street, and the other a grassy field. There was a wooden fence lining the back wall, along with dumpsters and mounds of black garbage bags. I was watching Glenn inch his way towards the street end of the alley, when I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. I turned and shot the man in the chest, but not before he got a shot off. The man lies on the ground, writhing in pain, and moaning out. I turned to see where Glenn was and caught a glimpse of his feet sticking out from behind a dumpster.

Rick came running up behind us, his face covered in sweat and eyes wild with worry. "Glenn!" I called out softly as Rick stuck his head out between Hershel and me. There was no response. _No, no, no, don't you fucking do this to me. _Rick was already halfway out the door, and I grabbed him. "I'm coming with." "Stay back and cover me," Rick commanded. "You got medical training?" I asked harshly. Rick didn't answer as he looked to where Glenn was hidden. "If he's shot he'll need help." Rick nodded and both of us left the back door, Hershel covering our backs. I kept my eyes ahead, watching for walkers or any of Dave and Tony's group. "Glenn!" Rick whispered loudly. "Are you hit?" Rick asked a little louder. Glenn answered his voice thick and shaky. "No, no, I'm good." Rick and I slipped into the tight space between the two dumpsters. Glenn trembled from the close call and his breathing was ragged like he just ran a mile. "Hey, we're almost there," Rick said with support. I stuck my head out to see the street and could just make out the red paint of Hershel's car.

"Ready?" I asked. Both men gave me a quick nod. I forget that humans are so different from the monsters I hunted. Monsters were predictable, hell, even some demons were. But humans, no. There isn't any way to predict how any one human being will act. So, when we came out from behind the dumpster I never thought there would be a fucking sniper. I barely had a second to react before I felt the fiery burn of my skin being ripped open as the hot, metal bullet grazed my arm. I fired at the sniper, before dropping back behind the dumpster. "Motherfucker!" I growled, pressing my forearm against my left bicep to staunch the bleeding. What I failed to notice was Rick leaning against the dumpster heavily, his Python lying on the ground. I looked the cop over quickly and saw the red liquid flowing heavily out of his right arm. "Shit," I mumbled, forgetting about my wound and ripping the bottom of my oversized thermal.

"You alright?" I asked, ripping his arm sleeve off. He grimaced as I turned his arm over to check the wound. "I'll live," he grumbled painfully. "Glenn, you good?" I asked quickly. "Yeah," he answered, clutching the shotgun tightly. The bullet didn't go through Rick's arm meaning I was going to have to dig it out. But we didn't have time for that. The loud roar of a truck sounded in the street. I heard the tires squeal to a stop, and one of the men shouting to the sniper. "We got to go man! Jump down, there are roamers everywhere!" "What about Steve?" The sniper questioned back. "We don't have time, we have to go! Jump down." I heard the collective moans of the undead and hurriedly wrapped Rick's arm. The Sheriff jerked as I tightened the bandage securely. Blood soaked my whole left sleeve, and my arm throbbed painfully. Hershel came up to us, his face etched in horror. "We need to go now," the old man said, giving the three of us a quick once over. "I agree with you," I said helping Rick to a crouched position. We watched the sniper jump down the roof, but he didn't land properly and tumbled the rest of the way down. Even over the sound of the engine and the growls of the walkers, you could hear the kid screaming.

The man in the car, yelled back at the kid, saying he was 'sorry' before driving off. "We got to go," I said helping Rick up. We moved out into the street, and I could see the walkers coming from way down the road. Hershel, Glenn, and I were moving towards the truck when Rick pulled away from me. "Rick!" I shouted and followed after him as he ran to the fallen sniper. He was a young kid probably around nineteen or twenty. He was lying on his back on top of a dumpster, screaming his head off. His left leg was impaled on the metal fence, the top posts pointed up like spears. The tip of the fence pierced his calf where his tibia bone was at. "What are you doing?" I asked, looking around for walkers. "We can't just leave him!" The cop defended. Hershel and Glenn joined us as Rick started. "He just shot you! He tried to kill you!" Glenn yelled, pleading with his eyes for Rick to just get in the car and go.

"He's a kid!" I examined the whining sniper. Hershel stepped up beside me, quickly assessing the situation. "It went clean through. No way to get it off in one piece," Hershel said calmly. The kid's screams sounded loudly through the dead town, drawing walkers to us. "Shut up!" I said. Hershel pulled Rick aside, while Glenn and I tried to quiet him. Glenn grabbed the injured leg making the kid cry out and go silent as Glenn yelled at him and then apologized. "I don't want more people to die, but this is cruel!" Hershel said desperately. Truly it was. Either way, this kid was going to have difficulty walking again. He would become a hassle to anybody in a group that was not compassionate. I agreed with Hershel; put the kid out of his misery. "Can we just cut the leg off?" Glenn asked. We all stopped, thinking the idea over. Even the kid stopped screaming when he heard the idea.

"We go that hatchet?" Rick asked. "What? No, no, no, please don't," the kid begged mercilessly. "Fuck the hatchet," I said pulling out the demon knife, "This will work." "Hershel took off his white button up, explaining rapidly where he had to cut and what needed to be done afterwards. I helped the man tie the tourniquet, and helped Rick hold the kid's squirming body down. "Guys, hurry up!" Glenn shouted. I heard him fire off two shotgun shells before Rick pulled away from the kid. "They're everywhere," he said disbelieving. I ignored Rick and all the gunfire, trying to help Hershel as much as possible. "Hold his leg down," the old man commanded. Rick and Glenn yelled over and over that we needed to go, but this was going to take time if we wanted to save this kid.

"Hershel do it now!" Rick said coming back to us. "I need time!" he yelled back. The walkers were coming too close now. The old man stepped away, running to Glenn who was starting the car up. "Please don't leave me!" the kid begged incessantly. Rick looked torn and I did the only thing I knew would get the cop in the car. I grabbed the kid's impaled leg firmly and with as much force as I could muster, shoved it up and off of the pointed fence. I could hear the muscles shredding in his leg and the blood sputtering out of the open wound. The kid screamed like a banshee, but it didn't matter. I pulled out my gun, dragging the kid off the dumpster. Rick grabbed one side of the kid, and together we moved as fast as possible to the car. The walkers were close enough you could make out they're decaying faces. I let go of the kid, making Rick support him as I put down as many of the undead as I could.

I zoned out, my mind focused on my aim and how many bullets were left. Rick grabbed me on the shoulder, pulling me back towards the car. We jumped in, shutting the doors in time to let a walker slam into it. Glenn stepped on the gas, slamming us hard against our seats. "We need to find a place to stop for the night," I said over the whimpering of the injured kid. Glenn nodded and the car went silent.

**Daryl's POV**

My crossbow bumped repeatedly against my back as I stormed towards the central camp. The pure rage and hurt that filled me could be felt by the others as soon as I reached the circle of assorted chairs. Dale, Carol, T-Dog, and Shane were the only ones at camp. I ignored the others stalking right up to Carol, questioning her furiously. "When did you see her?" Carol stared at me confused, stumbling out, "Who Daryl?" "Aria." "Not long after the barn," Carol said, her voice laced with sadness. I stepped away from the group, my hands wrapped behind my head trying to calm myself. "Daryl, what's wrong?" she asked like a worried mother. The note was in my pocket, but I could remember every damn line. _'I'm not coming back.'_ "She fucking left," I ground out hatefully. "What do you mean she left?" Dale asked his soft features etched in concern. "She left! Gone! You need me to spell it out for you?" I snapped.

"Alright, calm down a second. How do you know she's gone? Did you check everywhere?" Shane asked as if he was talking to a small child. "I'm not fucking stupid! She left me a goddamn note that's how I know!" My hands pulled into tight fists at my sides. Everybody thought I was a simple-minded, backwoods redneck. I hated that. If it weren't for the things I knew all these damn people would have starved in those first few weeks. "Fuck it, I'll find her by myself," I said dismissively, turning my back on them and making my way to the group of cars? _She knew I would look for her. So, she would have taken a car to cover her tracks. _"You can't go out by yourself," Shane commanded, but it fell on deaf ears. The lack of regard for his order rubbed the cop the wrong way.

"Fine, go out and find your fuck buddy. Sure she's moved on to a better man now," he heckled. I stopped dead in my tracks. I could imagine steam coming from my ears my blood was boiling so profusely. I turned towards the cop, "You mean like Lori did to you?" I shot back. Shane's face burned red like hot metal. He started towards me, his fist clenched. I welcomed the fight. From day one the man didn't like me and I've been looking for a reason to take that cocky look off his face. Shane threw a punch and I ducked. The punch missed and I caught him in the gut. That was as far as we got before T-Dog and Dale stepped in, pulling us off each other. Dale was struggling to push me back away from Shane. Carol grabbed my arm firmly and I looked away from Shane and T-Dog. "This isn't going to help you find her," she explained with force. I shrugged her and Dale off, making my way towards the cars.

Carol's light steps followed me into the dark night. "What are you doing?" I growled, spinning around to face her. "Keeping an eye on you," she replied softly. "I don't need you. I don't need anybody." I turned away continuing on. "Daryl, please don't do this?" her voice pleaded. "Do what?" I snapped, stopping once again. "Don't let this consume you. You've come so far," she said softly. I didn't want to hear her pleading words. I wanted to yell, to beat anything so long as I could release the emotional baggage inside me. "If you spent this much time worrying about your daughter, none of this would have happened." Carol's expression didn't waiver. She kept a calm face, full of strength. I watched her through squinted eyes. "Come on," she baited, "Let it out." That was all I needed. She gave me the opportunity to release it all. I scoffed at the woman, "What do you want? Huh? Just go!" Carol stood firmly, her eyes watching me with a deep understanding. The look in her eyes only fueled the fire. She didn't understand anything. "You're alone now with no husband, no daughter, and you don't know what to do with yourself. Well, you're not my problem! Neither was Sophia! None of you damn people are my problem!" I yelled, taking a step towards her lost in the moment.

Carol flinched instinctively and I stopped, watching her struggle to keep her emotions in check. _This is probably what she went through all the time with Ed. _I beat myself mentally for saying the woman didn't understand. She knew what anger could do to a man, and all she was trying to do was help me. But, I wouldn't apologize. My pride wouldn't let me. We watched each other closely, both struggling with our inner thoughts. "You need to find her. For both of your benefits, but trying to find her now is only going to do more harm than good," she explained with soft words. I wouldn't apologize, but I figured I could listen to her advice. She was right anyway. It was too dark now to go searching for anybody. I gave a huff and walked away, going back to my camp to let my mind dwell over Aria's words.


	20. Chapter 20

***Hey everyone! I'm trying to get a chapter out each week, that's my goal. So, hopefully Ch. 21 will be out by next weekend :) This chapter is shorter, but full of lot's. Reviews are always appreciated whether they are ideas for the story or just a comment about the chapter. Enjoy!***

**Aria's POV**

"Glenn, stop the car," I called from the back seat. The world outside was as black as the goo that came from the Leviathans. The headlights lit up the road in front of us, but only enough to see the concrete ground. In leaving the town we had to go the opposite way of the farm because the road was blocked with walkers. "We can't just stop here," his words said with panic. Those large brown eyes stared at me through the rearview mirror, as the blackness of night passed by blindly. I locked eyes with him, mine hard and empty, but full of authority. "Stop the damn car," I commanded coldly. He gave me one last fleeting look before unwillingly stopping the car. Glenn turned the vehicle off not wanting to waste gas and turned around in his seat. Rick was beside me, his head pressed up against the glass. His eyes were drooping and I was worried about an infection from the bullet wound.

The kid beside me was out cold, slumped down in his seat with a blindfold covering his eyes. I didn't want him knowing where the farm was. After all, he did try to kill us. "Rick, I need to take that bullet out of your arm." The sheriff looked to me with tired blue eyes. "We don't have any supplies," he said voice stronger than he looked. "Yeah, I know. But if I don't get that out soon you're going to get an infection." Rick's eyes drifted to Hershel in the front seat. Hershel dipped his head in sympathy. The cop nodded in understanding, steeling himself against the oncoming pain. "Alright." I unbuckled my belt, pulling the leather through the loops of my jeans. "Bite down on this," I commanded handing him the belt while rolling up my sleeves.

"We got a flashlight?" I asked the two men up front. "No," Glenn answered after giving the front seat a quick look. _Guess we're doing this blind. _ I undid the blood soaked bandages from his arm, ripping his shirt sleeve to get better access to the wound. With no source of light I couldn't tell if the area around the hole was puffy or red with infection. I gripped his forearm tightly, pressing it against the door like a sandwich in hopes that it would stop the arm from moving while my fingers were inside. I didn't count down or ask if he was ready. My fingers dug into the fleshy meat of his bicep while he cried out against the leather strap in his mouth. He jumped in his seat from the pain, but I continued to push my fingers deeper. I could feel the sinewy tissue of his muscles against my skin, the blood dripping out of the wound as I made it bigger to fit my fingers. Rick's hands were white as the meat of a coconut as he clenched his fists against the pain. I sunk my fingers a little deeper and felt the smooth metal of the round bullet. "Got it," I grunted trying to hold his arm and body in place. My fingers were dripping in the red liquid, the brass casing slick in my fingers as I held it out in front of Rick.

The sheriff spit the belt out, his breathing labored and sweats covering his brow. I took my knife out, slicing another strand of fabric from my oversized thermal, and wrapped the wound securely, staunching the bleeding wound. "Thanks," he muttered weakly. I didn't reply as I turned in my seat and faced the injured kid. "Hershel, how far are we from the next town?" I asked feeling the kid's forehead. His skin was sticky with sweat, a slight fever developing. "A couple of miles, why?" he asked. I undid the makeshift binding around his leg, the cloth heavy with blood. The gaping wound was still bleeding and I was beginning to worry about blood loss. "I need to find a pharmacy or something or else this kid is going to bleed out," I responded applying pressure to the wound. The sudden touch at the mangled spot woke the kid with a cry of pain.

His arms grabbed me trying to push me off, but I pressed harder on the injury. He yelped in agony, and I quickly wrapped the calf in more fabric to stop the blood from freely pouring out. The kid took his blindfold off and I grabbed his chin roughly, pinning both his arms against his chest. "Shut the fuck up or we will leave you here as walker bait," I threatened. He gulped in fear, his adam's apple bobbing at the action. He nodded, his large brown eyes glued to my vicious green ones. I tied the blindfold around his head again, and turned towards Glenn. "Do we have enough gas to get us to the town and back to the farm?" I questioned. "Yeah." "Let's check it out. We need antibiotics, and the other town isn't safe to scavenge anymore with all the walkers swarming it." Everybody nodded and the car started with a quick rumble.

Rick's eyes were on me as I stared straight ahead out the window shield. I could feel them trying to grasp my vicious actions. _'Don't do this, please Aria. You need to feel' _Sam's pleading voice begged in my mind. I ignored the voice like before pushing it away like it meant nothing. The voice was just another reminder of the failure I was; another reminder of the people I lost. _'You're living in fear. You're scared to let yourself have something you deserve. You deserve these people, you deserve Daryl.' _Dean's voice stated with vigor. _'Aria, you're stronger than this. You can do this.' 'These people need you.' _Their voices sounded in my mind relentlessly. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to force them away, but they only got louder. Their words were wrong. They were gone and it was just a figment of my imagination. I wanted them to be here and save me from myself. _SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP! _Their constant voices ceased and I was met with the quiet silence of the car. Rick laid his hand on my arm in concern. I couldn't help the sigh that escaped my lips as I turned to him. "You alright there?" he questioned searching my face. "I'm fine." My voice empty as I moved my arm away from him.

About twenty minutes later a town that looked like it came out of some cheesy romance movie appeared. Glenn drove down the main road, watching closely for the pharmacy and any signs of the dead. The town was just as small as the last one. It was a typical country side town with all family owned businesses and signs in the window saying 'God bless' and 'Take what you need'. At the edge of the petite town was the medical store. The windows were smashed in and as we came closer I could make out a few of the undead wandering about inside. The street was empty and I assumed that most of the walkers were trapped inside the buildings like the ones in the medical store. Glenn stopped a little way out of the town and I turned to see a few of the undead following after us.

"You're going to turn around and drop me off. Keep driving and try and get them to follow while I sneak in and grab what we need," I said checking my ammo and making sure everything was in its place. "Are you crazy?" Glenn asked looking at me with wide eyes. "That's a suicide mission." "I can't let you go in there," Rick said strictly. I ignored the comments, already moving the kid over to my seat so I could jump out of his door. "Aria!" Rick called, reaching over and pulling my arm. I looked at the three men. They all wore the same face of concern. "We'll wait till we get back to Hershel's. You don't need to risk your life for this," Rick said. _Ha, don't need to risk my life. _He didn't understand that this was natural for me, even when I was emotionless. My basic instinct was to protect those around me. I was expendable.

"If I don't make it back in ten minutes, go." With that I pulled away from Rick and jumped out of the car before any of them could stop me. As soon as my feet hit the ground I was running. Hershel's car came up behind me, speeding up and bypassing me to do exactly as I said. The walkers that were heading towards us were now turning back to the town to follow the red SUV. I held my machete, running as silently as possible to avoid the remaining walkers. I decided to circle around the building where there was less of the undead. I found the back entrance to the medical store and slipped in effortlessly. I was in a large stock room with no source of light. It was like looking into the eyes of a demon the room was so dark. My heart beat rapidly in my chest as I made my way through the blackness. I focused all my attention on my hearing, straining to hear any shuffling or another breathe in the room. I made it to the other side of the supply room with no interference and prepared myself for the possible horde inside.

My arm stung as I pressed up against the steel door. I breathed deeply in through my nose, exhaling through my mouth to calm myself. The roar of the car could still be heard and I hoped that the some of the walkers managed to escape the building. I turned the metal knob, pushing on the door gently to avoid any squeaking hinges. The door glided open easily and my eyes swept the darkness for anything. I cautiously stepped into the aisled room, shutting the door behind me soundlessly. Each aisle was stocked with shelves that contained assortments of drugs. The moon's beam cast a weak light into the back of the store and I worked my up and down each aisle checking for company. The pharmacy department was closed off from the rest of the store to my relief. A sealed door with an electronic locking mechanism was needed to enter. The counter was even protected by a bullet proof glass. I laughed at my luck. For once something was going right. I finished my sweep, ecstatic to find it empty. I grabbed a plastic bag from behind the counter and ran up and down the aisles grabbing any type of painkiller and antibiotic they carried. When I filled the bag with the drugs I grabbed another filling it with syringes, gauze, gloves, and anything else that looked helpful.

When I finished I grabbed the two bags and made my way out the back. I crossed the room of darkness and reached the rear door floating on a cloud. I opened the back door and fell off my little cloud. Walkers covered the back alley and their soulless eyes locked on me as I stood with the door open. "Shit" I muttered slamming the door on a walker. I dropped the bags and looked around for anything to block the door. Their relentless hands clawed at the door, rattling it on its hinges. My time was running out. I told Rick ten minutes and I knew that it was almost out. I snatched my bags off the ground and ran back the drug room. I locked the door and moved a cart in front of it, knowing that it wouldn't stop the walkers. I looked out the front of the store and I could see a few lone ones wandering about at the front of the store.

The crushing sound of a door being kicked in sounded in the silence. I turned and saw the door to the enclosed room shake with the force of the undead. _Run. _There was no other choice. I grabbed the handle of the locked pharmacy door and ripped it open. I pushed my legs in front of the other as fast as they could. I pulled my gun out and shot at any walker that lunged for me. The street was mostly empty, but the noise of the car drew a crowd from the woods and they were all trained on me. I took off in a dead sprint out of the town hoping Glenn would show up there. I focused on what was ahead of me, trying to drown out the sound of shuffling feet and vicious growls that followed. Light illuminated the street from behind and I turned to see Hershel's red Chevy driving towards me, taking out walkers on its way. Glenn barely stopped as he came up next to me, the back door open. I scrambled in just in time as the door shut and a hairless woman slammed into it, her bloodied face leaving a red smear of the clear window.

Glenn kept his foot pressed against the accelerator, pushing the speedometer to ninety miles per hour as we flew away from the town. "What the hell were you thinking? You could have died!" Rick yelled next to me before I could even slump in relief. I handed him the two bags filled heavily with supplies. "I was thinking we needed this." His blue eyes were a storm of relief, anger, gratefulness, and worry. "We stick together, Aria. We're a family and we need to stay together, none of this lone wolf shit," he replied sternly. I glared the cop down, "Don't worry about it, after we get you and the boy stitched up I'm gone." Rick's face faltered at my words and I grabbed the bag with the pills. I rummaged through grabbing some vicodin and penicillin. I handed two large white pills and two red and yellow capsules to Rick. "Its vicodin and an antibiotic," I said slipping another four pills into my hand. Rick took the pills without argument and I switched spots with him so I was in between him and the kid.

I gave him a gentle slap on the cheek and he jolted upright in his seat. The blindfold disorientated him and he reached to tug it off. I grabbed his hands, pinning them down against his lap, "Open your mouth," I ordered. The kid squeezed his lips together forming a thin pink line. "Do you want to stop the pain?" I asked my voice harsh. He opened his mouth and I dropped the pills in, putting a bottle of water to his lips. I took my belt that Rick used to bite down on and tied the kid's hands. He was shaking slightly, but I didn't care. "What's your name?" I questioned, lifting the injured leg to my lap. He whimpered silently before shakily responding. "R-Randall." I ripped the pant leg to gain better access to the puncture wound. I undid the bloodied rags and rifled through the plastic bag of supplies. "Wh-what are you doing?" he asked with fear dripping off of every syllable. "Cleaning the wound." I found the bottle of alcohol and undid the cap. "Stay still," I commanded as I gripped his leg firmly and poured the stinging liquid into his wound.

Randall thrashed against me, screaming out in pain, and causing Glenn to slam on the brakes. We flew forward, catching ourselves on the front seats. I clasped Randall's mouth shut, and spoke with understanding. "I know it burns like a bitch, but if I don't do this you're going to lose this leg because of an infection." Randall continued to whimper in agony, but gave me a nod. I poured some more on the gaping wound, eliciting yet another yelp of pain from the boy. Glenn put the car in park, waiting for me to finish so that we didn't have a repeat of the car braking so suddenly. I grabbed some fresh gauze and wrapped his leg to keep the wound as clean as possible in the conditions we were in. "Hershel, do you know how to get us back?" Rick questioned tiredly. "Yes," the old man responded, giving Glenn some quick instructions before we started off again.

I laid Randall's leg down, closing the bag of supplies up. I rested against the seat allowing my muscles to uncoil. My body cried in exhaustion and all the aches came at once. My jaw was tender from the punch and I bet there would be some bruising in the next day or so. The torn skin of my bicep pulsed with a constant pain and I knew that the graze was deeper than I originally thought. Rick's head rested against the blood streaked window heavily. His eyelids drooped with sleepiness as the events of the day caught up with him and the vicodin coursed through his bloodstream. I laid my head back and watched the interior top shake with the bumpy ground; one thought coursing through my mind. _How could I face Daryl?_

The gravel exploded up around the car, hitting the red colored metal. I could make out the farm as Glenn steadily drove up. Randall was out cold, his head lolled back and his mouth agape. I averted my gaze from the house where the others would be. I couldn't see him. I knew that the moment he tried to stop me my resolve would crumble. He would want answers; answers that I couldn't give for the benefit of these people. The world was already ugly; they didn't need to bear with anymore. But it was more than protecting them from a dirty little secret; it was about keeping every last one of them alive. I wasn't in control anymore. I could feel myself falling apart and I didn't know how to fix it. Sam and Dean were always able to put me back together when it became too much, but they couldn't help me now. The thing with turning the switch off was that the emotions were still there, bubbling under the suffocating door I locked them behind. I felt numb and out of control. I would blow up on people, attack others; rage the only feeling that was able to escape. But that door was splintering underneath all the grief, hatred, and pain. They begged to be released, to overcome me so violently that I was sure I would die.

We pulled up in front of the white-painted farmhouse, watching as Hershel's girls and Lori came spilling out the front door. Rick was out of the door first, wrapping his arms around his wife and son. Glenn and Hershel both stepped out after and Maggie brushed by her father without any concern and gripped Glenn. But Glenn just left his arms lay limply at his sides and walked away from her. "Patricia, prepare the shed for surgery," Hershel commanded walking towards the house to grab more supplies. I slowly stepped out of the car, staying hidden behind the car, watching Rick and Lori. "Are you okay?" she asked looking him over when she spotted his bandaged arm. She grabbed his arm in a death grip, trying to see under the bandaging. "What happened?" she asked in panic. Rick grabbed his wife's arm gently about to explain when I came around the Chevy.

"He got shot by the asshole in the car." Every pair of eyes was on me, but there was only one that made me go cold. I looked down refusing to make contact with anyone. I slipped back into the car, grabbing the bags of supplies, and waking Randall up. He was barely awake as I pulled him out of the car and assisted him towards the shed, his eyes still covered and hands still tied. I could hear the group whispering in weariness, but those eyes that burned into my back said everything. The stare was hateful penetrating my hard exterior and striking me in the heart painfully. _I should have stayed away. _When I reached the shed Hershel, Patricia, and Jimmy were already inside preparing the equipment. Randall moaned in pain, gentle whimpers of fear slipping out in between. "If you need me I'll be in the house stitching Rick up," I said helping Randall down on to a table. Hershel gave me a nod and I left with some of the supplies I scavenged.

The entire group was surrounded around Rick asking questions about what happened. They were scared and had every right to be, but I needed to do my job so I could get out of here before I got more people killed with my presence. "Rick!" I hollered, pulling everyone's attention to me. I was standing at the steps of the house, trying to ignore the lone figure straying on the outskirts of the group. I lifted the bag as an indication of what I needed. The leader pulled away from them, Carl and Lori right beside him. I met him in the dining room, grabbing some towels from the kitchen as he sat himself down in a seat. Lori gripped his shoulder supportively as I removed the bandages. "What happened to you?" Carl asked with an edge of worry as he stared at my bloodied sleeve. "It's nothing," I responded dismissively. I rubbed my hands with the alcohol, feeling the Grime parents glare at me. "Did you get shot too?" Carl asked innocently. I could feel uncontrollable rage leaking through the seams of the door. I kept my gaze on the wound, sterilizing it, and beginning the stitches. I ignored Carl's question and Rick finally spoke up. "Why don't you guys wait outside," he offered and Lori and Carl left, sending a puzzled look my way.

I pulled the needle in and out of his skin methodically, pulling the torn skin together like a piece of fabric. Rick flinched slightly at each stab of the needle, but stayed still overall, dealing with the pain. I knew what it was like to be stitched up with no type of numbing cream or being under. It took a lot of willpower to keep the moans down as the needle continually pierced the sensitive skin. I stopped the stitching and grabbed the bottle of vicodin. "Take two." Rick complied swallowing the two white pills down dry. The silence stretched on for minutes, the sound of footsteps from the upstairs padding around quietly. I closed the stitch, pouring another dose of alcohol over the wound and then wrapping it tightly in the fluffy white gauze. I slid the ragged thermal off me carelessly, sterilizing all the utensils for myself. Rick watched me intrigued as I began the stitching process on myself. I was used to the pain of the needle that it seemed nonexistent. I didn't flinch or hiss in pain at the way the thread pulled the skin together, instead keeping my face void of any emotion.

"Why do you want to leave?" Rick asked. It was the question I had expected since the moment we sat down. I wasn't close to anybody in this group except for Daryl. So, I didn't understand why Rick cared so much? We knew nothing about each other. Given, none of them knew anything about me, but Rick put all his trust in me. Maybe it was because I put my trust in him to protect these people? "Aria, I'm not letting you leave until you give me an explanation," Rick ordered after I refused to answer. "You can't stop me, Rick," I replied with conviction. _'Stay' _ Dean pleaded helplessly. I wanted the voices to stop. They only made the pain that much worse "You're a part of this group. Nobody is going to let you walk away just like that." I finished tying the stitch, repeating the same process I just performed. The truth was there were four people in this camp I knew wouldn't let me leave; Rick, Carl, Glenn, and Daryl. Everybody else wouldn't care. They all thought I was unstable anyway, they would probably be grateful to be rid of me. I finished wrapping my arm, cleaning up the bloodied bandages. I cleaned the table, all the while ignoring Rick's questions.

When it was all cleaned I stood and Rick stood also, blocking the walkway. "We're all grieving. I can't even begin to understand the pain you must feel, but…" I cut him off, my eyes finally meeting his. "You're right, you don't understand. You know nothing about what I have been through. So, you wouldn't even begin to fathom the reason I have to do this." That rage that slipped out while Carl was questioning me filled my body. "I'm doing this for you, for your family, for everyone in this group! Everybody will suffer if I stay!" I bellowed. Rick stood with determination. He wasn't going to just give up on me. I shoved around him, heading for the door. That locked hole inside me cracking, and I needed to get out of here. I was meant to be alone. "Aria, wait!" Rick called after me. _'Let them help you' _Dean commanded. I burst through the screened door and made my way towards the Chevy.

Dean's voice continued in my head, telling me I was wrong, that I needed to stay. I could hear Rick coming after me as I hit the ground. My steps were fast, my mind roaring with both Sam and Dean's voices. "Aria!" Rick called, the screen door closing behind him with a bang. _'Goddamn it, will you listen to me? Stop pushing everyone away!' _I couldn't focus on what was going on around me, their voices so loud, along with Rick's calls. The hand that gripped my bicep was strong, squeezing my limb harshly so I couldn't pull away. I looked back at the person and anxiety flooded my veins. "We need to talk," Daryl growled, his eyes burning with a blue fire of hurt and anger. "There is nothing to talk about. I told you everything I could," I snapped back. "You told me jackshit! All you said was you were sorry for fucking with me! Who the fuck you think you are telling me what I deserve? I want the fucking truth!" he screamed in my face. The rage in his voice was nothing compared the sea of hurt I was looking into. He trusted me, opened up to me, and I threw it away like last week's trash. Daryl was like me and I left him when he needed me. _I destroy everything I touch. _

"Fucking answer me!" His hand still wrapped around my arm. "I can't give you the truth!" I yelled back. The truth involved everything I feared. I couldn't say any of it because it would mean dealing with it and I couldn't. All my life I just continued to bury the pain, never coping with it. Fourteen years of the worst possible suffering imaginable locked into a dark hole to fester. Daryl shook his head in disbelief. "I told you everything! I trusted you, fucking promised to take care of you, and you can't give me a reason for leaving after everything?" Daryl let go of me, almost shoving me away from him. "You're a fucking coward."

That was the final kick that sent that splintered door into pieces. It consumed me in one gulp, leaving me without control. The switch was overridden and I felt everything. Every moment of my shit life came crashing down on me. "I'M NOT A COWARD! You want the truth? Fine! Here it is!" I screamed looking not only at Daryl, but the other members of the group that had gathered around us. "I was sixteen years old when I came home to find my step-father, the only father I had growing up, holding a kitchen knife in his hands as he held my mother and three siblings captive. You know what he did? He made me fucking watch as he grabbed my mother, making her look me in the eye, as he slit her throat. Then he grabbed my ten year old sister and slit her throat open as she screamed for me. Then he rammed a knife into my five year old sister's heart, and finally he made me watch as he cornered my three year old brother. I watched him slowly drive that knife into his chest; watched the life drain out of my brother!"

I watched it all play out again in my mind like it was stuck on an infinite loop. The tears were streaming down my face, but I couldn't stop; the constant flow of memories forcing the terrible nightmares out of my mouth. "You want to know why he did that. Because he wanted me, me and only me! But, that's not all. I watched my biological father bleed out in my arms, saving me from some crazed maniac. I watched my friends get blown up into pieces because there were IEDs in the fucking ground! My best friend died in a fucking explosion trying to get me out! The man that took me in after my family died was shot in the head! I was kidnapped for six months and tortured to within an inch of my life! I watched countless children be ripped apart by these fucking monsters because I couldn't help them! I had to kill the last piece of family I had left in my life!"

_'Breathe Aria" _Sam whispered, but I couldn't. I was hyperventilating; my whole body shaking with the onslaught. "EVERYTHING that I love has been taken from me! Everybody dies on me! But I never fucking gave up! I'M NOT A COWARD! I'm leaving because I'm a curse! Don't you understand that now? Sophia died because of me! Sam and Dean died because of me! EVERYBODY DIED BECAUSE OF ME!" I was struggling to pull air into my lungs. Everything around me was blurry from the tears that wouldn't stop. I could see their bloodied faces replacing those of the group around me. I saw Oriax standing at the edge of the group, a kitchen knife circling playfully in his hands. My stomach struggled to keep its contents down as I heard their screams, the bombs, the ripping of flesh from bone. I covered my ears, trying to make it go away but it only grew louder. "Stop, stop, stop," I mumbled. _'We're here shorty.' _ Sam's voice said desperately, but it was drowned out by the demons ripping me apart from the inside. My head was spinning and I could feel my body swaying.

Hands gripped me tightly and there was a voice trying to speak to me, but all the noise in my head was overwhelming. My eyes were trained on the ground and I saw red everywhere. I was knee deep in the thick blood and in the reflection of the liquid I could see all their faces. I went hysterical then, fighting against the person holding me, choking on the sobs that erupted from my chest. In the blood I was watching them all tie me down and slice into me like a piece of meat. _'Cas, do something!' _Dean's voice screamed in my head. But the message never registered with me because I could feel every slice of that knife. The person that was holding me shook me till I finally looked up. My eyes so wide with fear they looked as though they were going to pop out of my skull as I looked up. The blue-eyed angel stared at me with his usual stony face. "Cas?" I asked in wonder as he placed two fingers to my temple. Soft warmth enveloped me and my vision darkened. The memories dimmed, the hallucinations dying around me. I caught one last look at my long lost friend, his gruff voice filled with sorrow, "I'm sorry my friend."


	21. Chapter 21

***Sorry I took so long to update. This chapter was really hard for me to write and I hope that it doesn't suck. It's a boring chapter, not much happens, but next chapter is gonna be big! Promise. Anyway, enjoy and reviews are always welcomed.***

**Daryl's POV**

Aria's trembling body went still and completely limp in my arms; the sudden weight dragging me down to my knees. I looked up to call for help and instead saw the man in the trench coat, the same man who I saw at the ridge. He was standing beside us a sad, pensive look etched into his features as he looked at Aria. I saw a flutter of wings, a soft light envelop him, and he was gone. I blinked a few times, looking around for the man. I turned to the other members of the group, hoping they had seen the man also, but all of them were crowding around Aria to check on her. _What did I just see? _

The loss of Aria's body in my arms pulled me out of my astonished state and back to reality. Rick had her flat on the ground, his ear close to her mouth and eyes trained down her body. After ten seconds he checked the pulse on her neck. After a few seconds he leaned back on his knees. "She passed out," Rick reported with a faraway look. Everyone looked the same, a shell shocked expression cast on their long faces. I looked back down at the green-eyed girl. Her cheeks were still wet with tears, the bags under her eyes a blackish blue. I saw the minute she broke. Those empty eyes filling with so much raw emotion, her words shocking all of us. I finally understood why she got so upset when talking about the past; there was nothing but misery.

Then I came along and forced it all out of her; forced her to relive each moment. I couldn't help but feel guilty. But I was so angry, so hurt by her leaving. I needed her to say it out loud to know that the words in the letter were true. I slipped an arm under her back and knees, carrying her towards her tent. Nobody said a word as I walked away with her. I knew how she felt about sympathy, and I wasn't going to leave her lying there like a show freak for everyone to just stare at. I unzipped the tent, Aria still in my arms and slipped in. The only thing in the tent was the sleeping bag. I laid her down, slipping her boots off, and tucked her in. I shook my head at myself. The effect this girl had on me. I was angry, but she needed somebody. She stood up for me against Shane, defending my actions. She accepted me for who I was, the least I could do was return the favor, even if I was still slightly pissed for her leaving.

Aria looked completely at peace. The only signs of her breakdown were the puffiness around her eyelids and tear streaks that stained her rosy cheeks. Her hair was falling out everywhere from the top bun she wore, a few of them covering her face. I wanted to reach out and tuck them behind her ear, but I remained still. Having her back was what I wanted; getting the answers is what I wanted, but I didn't feel any less hurt. I fucking trusted her, why couldn't she trust me? I thought we understood each other, that there was something good between us. Maybe I didn't blame her so much now that she left, but I still felt betrayed. I rubbed my face roughly, giving Aria one last look before leaving her to rest.

The group had gathered around the dead campfire some sort of debate going on. Rick saw me coming towards them, drawing the attention of everybody else to my approach. "How is she?" Rick asked. "Out, like a light," I commented. We all stood in silence, our eyes lowered to the ground. "What just happened?" T-Dog asked in shock. Everyone was thinking the same thing. "She couldn't handle it anymore," Rick said with remorse.

It was true. She didn't talk about her past, leaving it for Sam and Dean to explain for her. They were her protectors, a Band-Aid. They helped her to cover the past, and hoping it would heal eventually. But, instead of healing it festered. She needed an antibiotic, needed to face the grief head on, but she was scared. She feared the memories that would attack her if she ever talked about it. When the brother's died that Band-Aid was ripped off, leaving another stinging pain along with the festered past. But she blamed herself for everything. She blamed herself for things that were out of her control. I was afraid of my past, the memories that came with it and the scars too. Yet, I never blamed myself for those beatings. My old man was a piece of shit that was it.

The whispering of the leaves filled the soundless air, our eyes casting shy glances to the blue tent where Aria stayed. "Do you think she's going to be okay?" Carl asked, looking up to his mother and father with worried eyes. They stood speechless, along with the rest of us. Hell, I didn't even know and I hated that, hated the unknown. "I mean Aria is really strong, she has to be okay, right?" The way Carl looked to Rick and Lori for confirmation was depressing. Aria was great with the kids, especially Carl. Before Sam and Dean, anytime she passed the Grimes kid she would give his hair a little tousle or a half-five. I think Carl saw her as an older sister or at least someone to look up too. "She's gonna be fine." Carl turned his brown eyes on me and they were lit up with relief.

The group dispersed after that, leaving Rick and I. "You really think she's going to pull through?" "She's not gonna roll over and die. She's a fighter," I remarked. The betrayal was fading as I thought about why I was so hurt in the first place. I never fought for anything in my life. Never fought back against my old man or Merle, I just took what I was given. I let people leave me. But, Aria was something worth fighting for. So, I didn't know if she was going to wake up and be the same girl I met in those Georgia woods, but I knew I wasn't going to let her just walk away.

**Aria's POV**

_The grains of sand massaged my feet as I curled my toes into the warmth, the crashing of the Atlantic sea like a sweet lullaby to my ears. The ocean breeze pulled at my hair, whipping it behind me. The evening sky painted with purple hues, lightening the harsh reds that mixed with it. The ocean front was empty, the only exception my lone figure. I stepped closer to the water's edge, letting the receding waves tease me with its chilly temperature. The white foamed water crashed on the sandy ground, letting its impact roar through the still air. The icy water lapped over my bare feet, sending chills up my spine. I closed my eyes against that salty breeze, letting it fly me away to a place unknown. _

_ "Hello, Aria." The deep voice acknowledged. I opened my eyes with a wide smile as I looked beside me. Cas stood with his piercing blue eyes locked on the horizon, the soft breeze tousling his dark hair, and the lapels of his trench coat. "Hey feathers," I said a content smile on my lips. Cas turned to me, his face serious, but softness in his eyes. "So, I'm either dead or you're visiting me in my dreams?" I asked. "You're not dead." "Figured that much, Sam and Dean would have found me by now." The boys told me that when they went to Heaven Ash had figured out a way to visit other people's Heaven. We told one another that we would find each other once we made our way up there. _

_ "Where have you been Cas?" my voice calm not a hint of disappointment or anger. I was glad to finally see someone from my past, somebody that could help me. Cas looked away, his attention floating to the small swallow that was flying above the blue water. "Cas?" The angel refused to speak. "Why haven't you answered my prayers?" A hint of aggravation made itself known in my voice. He stood statue still, his gaze fixated on the tiny bird. "So you're going to ignore me just like you have the past three months? Ignore me when I'm standing right next to you?" I was hurt. Cas was my friend, as much as a friend as Sam and Dean. He was family. Cas refused to even look my way as I ranted. I shoved him, his form staying still, but finally looking to me. _

_ "Are you going to answer me?" I asked frustrated. I just wanted answers. Why didn't he save Sam and Dean? Why didn't he save Sophia? "I can't give you answers to the questions you ask," he replied gruffly, not a hint of emotion on his face. "What do you mean?" He was supposed to help me now. Help me figure out why this was happening. "Everything will make sense in time, my friend." "Make sense? What Cas, what will make sense? Just fucking tell me!" I didn't want the cryptic bullshit. "I can't," he snapped back a look of frustration and sadness in his angelic eyes. "What happened to 'I got your back'?" My words tinged with disappointment. His face crumbled beneath the stony façade he wore. "You and me, it was our job to watch out for those two, and you left. You abandoned us. I never gave up on you! Even when the other angels gave up, I still believed. Even when Sam and Dean lost faith, I was still there praying. So, give me a better answer than I can't!" _

"_I wish I could my friend, but I have orders." Cas stared across the dark water, watching as it faded into the beginning of the night sky. "So, Heaven is still functioning? That means this thing is demonic, right?" The fallen angel shook his head, "I must go." He stepped back preparing to disappear. "You'll come if I call?" I asked searching those sky blue eyes. "Goodbye, Aria." The sound of wings flapping together marked the exit of the angel. Another wave crashed into the beach, the sun giving its last farewell before plunging me back into a blackness of heartache. _

My brain slammed itself against the walls of my skull. I didn't even open my eyes, but I could feel them pulsing in pain beneath my swollen eyelids. A dull throbbing came from my jaw, and there was dryness in my throat. I slowly peeled my eyes apart, letting them open in a slight daze. I was curled up on my side, a cocoon of my own heat to warm me against the chilled air. The massive black hole in my chest was quiet, making me numb. It was all out in the open, no barriers to hold them back. Everything floated around in my mind tied to the edges of my every thought.

Never in my life did I feel as weak as I did now, lying here, my thoughts abusing me non-stop. _Lonely. _I was completely and utterly alone. Cas was off being angel of the month, too busy to help, and Daryl hated me. His eyes wallowed with hurt and anger, and I think it's too late to fix what I did. It wouldn't matter even if I could fix it; the group probably thinks I'm a nutjob. Maybe they're right. Maybe this was it, the final crack that made me fall into koo koo land. Probably end up like poor Martin, wasting away to nothing, lost to the demons inside me.

My stomach turned uneasily and I pulled my knees up to my chest, trying to make myself disappear. I didn't want to see the others, see the pity in their sad eyes. I wanted to be strong, show them that I was fine, but I was too tired. I didn't want to fight it anymore. Besides, what was the point of fighting? There was nothing left living for. The world sucked and I pushed away the last person I cared for._ 'There is a reason for hope.' _Tears filled my eyes at the voice. I could feel the memories clawing their way out of the hole and setting to the task of making me remember. I saw the bloodied teeth marks on his forearm, the wet strands of hair glued to his burning forehead, the light fading from those comforting hazel eyes.

I let the tears flow freely as Sam's words echoed around me. I wanted to believe his words, believe that I still had something worth fighting for, but it hurt. It hurt knowing that I didn't have anyone to help carry this burden that no one would be by my side to pick me up when I fell. I wanted my boys back, my family.

The metal teeth of the zipper buzzed. I didn't have the energy to turn my head to see who it was. A figure stepped in lightly, closing the flap against the cooling air. I stared blankly at the side of the tent, not moving. The person kneeled down behind me, the smell of cooked meat enveloping the air. The nausea in my stomach increased, my hand shooting up to my mouth to keep the bile down. The intense smell, lightened as the food was pushed aside, free hands now soothingly rubbing my back. The nausea ended as quickly as it came, and I furrowed deeper into my sleeping back, ignoring the person. The hands left me as I tried to curl into a ball of nothing.

We waited in silence, each of us seeing who was going to move first. I wasn't ready to face people yet. I wanted to be alone, isolate myself from everyone so I would never have to feel loss again. "I don't think you're weak," Carol spoke quietly. "I admire you, actually. I think a lot of us do." Her voice was like a blanket fresh out of the dryer, comforting and warm. She waited for me to speak, but all I could see was her heartbreak as she watched me shoot her daughter. "I don't blame you for Sophia."

I wish I could say the same for myself. I wish I could wipe away the guilt I felt every time her name was mentioned. Her confession did nothing to ease my pain. A stray tear slipped, and Carol noticed. She reached out and rubbed my back in comfort. The memory of my mother's smile came forward. She was my comforter, always there to ease the pain. Carol's hands reminded me of my mom's gentleness as she would pull me to her chest, wrapping her arms around me, and let me cry. But that part of me that insisted on being strong, refused to let the tears fall. The silence stretched on, as I fought to keep my raging emotions intact.

One thing I will never learn is how a mother always knows what to say. They have this special ability to break you down when you need it the most. "Crying is not a sign of weakness, it just means you have been strong for too long. You don't have to do this alone, Aria." That was it, the final push over the edge. The tears fell in waves, soaking my cheeks. Her words hit home. Ever since my family died I felt the need to be strong. Even when Sam and Dean came into my life, I still felt that need. Instead of being strong for myself, I needed to be strong for them. I wasn't able to be weak since the things I hunted would use that against me. I wanted to let them in, let Carol and Daryl understand who I was, but I couldn't. Not even after revealing all I have been through because they still don't know everything. They didn't know what really happened, what I have seen.

The world of the supernatural was still unknown to them. They didn't know about the things that went bump in the night, or the things that stalked your nightmares as a child were real. Knowing that made you a different person. But, Carol was right; I had been strong for too long. Maybe the group only knew half the story, but they knew enough to understand. _'It's time to start trusting people again, A. You can't live in this world without help from others.' _ Dean was right. We all needed each other, not just for survival, but to lean on when it got too tough. This new world was brutal; it was hard to find hope when you needed it. But with people, you found hope in each other and that's what helped you to survive.

My silent tears ended with a sniffle as I pulled away from Carol's hand. I sat up; my sleeping bag bunched up in my lap, and reached for the food that was set aside. I didn't look at Carol or talk to her as I ate. Eating the plate of food was an acceptance of her words. She sat quietly beside as I ate, taking my plate when I finished. I curled back up in my sleeping bag, and Carol left without another word. There was nothing more to be said. I had accepted the advice, but I wasn't ready to start using it. I pulled the bag tightly around my shoulders and stared into nothing, letting the emotional pit consume me once more.

It was mid-afternoon and I was still lying in my tent. Andrea came this morning with a plate of eggs, but I pretended to be asleep so she would leave me alone. I was scared to see them. I didn't know what to expect from them, but I knew I didn't want to hear a slew of 'I'm sorry's'. The black hole in me was still raw and I felt unstable, but I was going stir crazy sitting in my tent alone with the memories and voices. I blew out a puff of air, rubbing my hands over my eyes. It was Daryl I was afraid to see. I was angry at myself for leaving the way I did. I was angry that I couldn't trust him enough to truly open up like he did with me.

I sat up, tired of staring at the top of the tent and looked around. I found my duffel bag tucked in the corner by the entrance and I crawled over to it. My clothes were bloodied from Randall and Rick and my injuries from two days ago. I opened my bag and found everything there. I pulled out some fresh clothes and got dressed. My body was stiff from the lack of movement and I tried stretching out the sore muscles. I could vaguely hear some conversations from the group, and I paced back and forth uneasily, my doubts keeping me from walking out of the tent. _Maybe one more day? Tomorrow I'll be better. _That was bullshit. I was never going to be okay. The last fourteen years was proof of that. I stopped my pacing, staring at the zipper. I took a deep breath and unzipped it before I changed my mind.

I squinted against the shining sun, raising a hand to my eyes. A strong breeze swept through the trees, whipping a few loose strands of hair in my face. A slight chill ran up my spine from the wind and I pulled the large thermal closer around me. A few members of the group were gathered around the fire pit. Carol and Lori were folding laundry while Carl sat at the picnic table writing something. T-Dog was on watch atop the RV, a rifle in hand. I figured with the new threat of Randall we had somebody guarding him, and Daryl was probably out hunting. I took one last calming breath and made my way towards the others. I kept my head down, my arms pulled tight against my chest as I walked to them. "Mom," Carl called out to his mother quietly. I looked anywhere but at the camp knowing that Carl had drawn attention to me.

The screen door of Hershel's house slammed and I jumped, turning to the noise. Rick stepped out with Shane, Andrea, and Glenn behind him. _Shit. _I wasn't ready to see all of them. I figured I would be okay with a few, but almost everyone was here except Dale and Daryl, who I assumed was in the RV, so really only Daryl. I couldn't turn back and hide in my tent, so I continued on. It was either now or never. Carl jumped out of his seat and came running to me. He stopped just before me, a hidden smile on his face. "I'm glad you're feeling better because mom's been making me do math problems to keep me busy." His eyes shone with happiness, but I couldn't return it. His freckled face and growing brown hair resembled _him._ Trey would be a senior in high school now; his boyish features resembling that of a young man. That raw hole burned with ache. I looked forward to seeing Trey grow up, watching him play football or whatever boys did. I wanted to help him with girl problems and kick the girl's ass that broke his heart, but the chance had been stolen from me.

Carl didn't pay attention to my lack of response, instead grabbing my hand and pulling me to the picnic table. "I bet you're really hungry since Carol said the last time you ate was the food she brought you," he said walking me to my seat. "I'll see if we have something leftover from this morning." Carl left, walking over to the RV. I sat at the picnic table, my head down, staring at my folded hands in my lap. I didn't know what to do. I felt so pathetic just sitting here, everybody watching me for a sign that I was going to break. I looked up as Rick and everyone came into camp. The muscles in my shoulders tensed as he saw me and made his way over. Carl came out at the same time, running up to his dad. "Look who's up? I knew she would be fine," Carl spoke happily. I stood up as everyone circled around me. I felt like I was on stage being judged.

Rick's hands were on his hips, his blue eyes looking directly at me. "How are you feeling?" he questioned. _How would you feel after having a mental breakdown?_ "I'm fine." Truth was I had no idea how I felt. I was a roller coaster of emotions, but I wasn't going to let him know that. Rick searched my eyes for any detection of a lie, but I kept them empty. "What happened with Randall?" I asked, diverting the attention from me. "We have him in the shed right now. Hershel stitched him up and he's on the pain pills you found." "Is he awake?" Rick shook his head, "In and out most of the time. He's not very coherent with the drugs he's on." Even though the kid's group left him to die, I still had a bad feeling about him being here. He couldn't be a part of this group, not after trying to kill Rick, Glenn, and me. The only other option was to let him go, but if he met up with his group again they could come back and attack us. He knew we were at a farm, which wouldn't be too hard for somebody to find.

"When does Hershel think he'll be able to walk?" "Not sure yet, could be a few days," he said. I could see the stress the sheriff was under. I'm sure everybody voiced their concerns and my questioning wasn't helping. "How's your arm?" Rick looked down at his wrapped bicep, then back at me, "Good, thanks to you," he said with gratitude. I gave him a quick nod, before looking around at everyone. Some of them were sitting at the picnic table talking, while a few of them stood by listening to Rick and I. "So, I was wondering if I could get my weapons back?" I noticed that my machete, Beretta, and the demon knife were missing. I knew they took them away because they were worried about my state of mind, but if they were trying to protect me from myself they failed. My duffel bag was filled with Sam and Dean's weapons.

"Why do you need them back? You're safe here," Shane commented, stepping up beside Rick. "Yeah, completely safe with you patrolling around." My words thick with sarcasm. Shane's jaw line tightened, his brown eyes darkening. "Enough, both of you," Rick commanded, a hand on Shane's chest. Shane pushed away and stormed off. Rick sighed in frustration, "Look, I'm glad you're up, but…" "You won't give me back my weapons," I finished. Now I was frustrated. This was stupid, we were in the middle of survival and I was being denied personal protection because I had a meltdown. "We're just looking out for you, Aria. It's nothing personal." "Really, Rick? Nothing personal? That's such bullshit right there. This is all because of what happened the other day, and now you're all walking on eggshells around me." Rick looked away with shame.

I turned to everyone, "You all wanted answers about my past. What? You didn't like it? Tough shit, life sucks and it isn't getting better. We're all the same in the same boat now; I think pity is a little outdated." I forgot about Carl and the snack he grabbed for me as I walked away from them. I didn't hear anybody following as I walked off towards the large fields of grass. The grass was long, coming up to my knees, as I made my way through it. This is exactly why I didn't want to see them. I wanted to get back to a normal routine, something to keep my mind busy. I didn't need people constantly reminding me with their sorry looks. My mind was doing that already.

I plopped down in the large field, pulling blades of grass from the earth and tearing them into confetti sized pieces. My mind lost itself in the rustling of the leaves. "Hey." I jumped to my feet, my heart pounding. Carl stood behind me, a plate of food in his hands, and a sorry expression. I sighed in relief seeing the young boy and sat back down. Carl took that as an invitation to stay and took a spot beside me. "Sorry for scaring you," he apologized, handing me the plate of crackers. "Not your fault, I should've been paying attention." It was true. I was away from the group with no weapons. Carl could have been a walker and in that case I would be dead. I munched on the stale crackers as Carl and I sat in silence, watching the grass around us sway.

"My mom's pregnant," he said nonchalantly. The dry food caught in my throat, causing me to choke. Carl patted my back gently, sitting back when I was breathing normally. "I'm gonna be a big brother," he said with excitement. I smiled at the memory of my mom telling me I was going to be a big sister. I was so excited to have somebody to hang out with. I wasn't very good at making friends when I was young so having a sibling would change that. "You're going to be an excellent big brother," I said giving him a reassuring smile. How were Rick and Lori going to have a baby in this world? It would be a magnet for walkers with its cries, and how were we going to keep it healthy? But maybe this was a sign. Maybe this was the hope we all needed to get us to continue on. I pushed the thoughts away, my headache returning.

Carl and I stayed in the field till the sun set, sometimes just watching the new quiet world in silence, other times talking about random facts. It was a nice distraction from the grown up conversations of what supplies do we need, what we should do about this, so on and so on. But Carl lost that innocence he had when I first met him. His eyes were darkened with the cruelties of the new world, and I could see him growing up quickly. It wouldn't be long before the childish behaviors would be gone and he would take on the roles of an adult, participating in runs and watch. It would be a while, but it would happen. This world stripped children of their childhoods, if you wanted to survive you needed to grow up quick.

Approaching footsteps had Carl and me searching for their owner. Rick was coming toward us; his eyes squinted against the sun. "Carl, mom wants you to come back and get ready for dinner." Carl nodded, standing up and waving good-bye to me before taking off back to camp. I stood once Carl left, brushing off my pants from the dirt and grass. I was silent as I grabbed my plate and started towards camp. "I'm sorry for earlier," Rick explained. I turned to the sheriff, waiting for more. "With the way Beth has been the past couple of days we just wanted to take a precaution. I should have waited and talked to you first before doing that." "Was it a precaution for me or for you?" I asked. The group saw the way I lashed out the night of the CDC and I wondered if maybe the real reason they kept my weapons was to protect them. "Both." I nodded in understanding. I was over it now.

"So, since you're apologizing, does that mean I get them back?" Rick nodded, and I turned to leave. "Aria, wait." Rick stood with his hands on his hips and a look of uncertainty on his face. "Are you still leaving?" I sighed in exhaustion. Honestly, I didn't know. My mind was so jumbled from the breakdown that I didn't know how I felt. I knew that I wanted to leave to protect these people, but was that really true or just the blame I figured I always deserved? Did they even want me to stay? I knew Carl and Carol did, but what about the others? I wouldn't be able to stay if they were scared of me. "You don't have to go. Like I said before, you're a part of this group. Everybody would miss you if you left, I included," Rick's words heavy with sincerity. I kicked at the ground aimlessly. It would be so much easier to leave. I wouldn't lose more people, I wouldn't have to face Daryl, and I would be away from Shane. But leaving wasn't all that easy. Even though I was scared to face Daryl, I still wanted to fix things. It was probably too late, but he was the first guy I felt truly safe and at home with. I could be myself, all my burdens and scars, and he accepted me for that.

My headache grew; the sun's light making my eyes hurt and the throbbing worse. I didn't want to do this, answer questions that I wasn't ready for. My head was too mixed up to even figure things out. "I don't know, Rick." He nodded his head solemnly and I felt a slight pang of guilt for letting him down. "We should probably head back, food's ready by now." Rick and I made our way back to camp. My arms crossed instinctively across my chest as we neared the others. The smell of cooking meat flooded my nostrils, my stomach cramping painfully in need. All I ate in the past couple of days was a plate of squirrel, stale crackers, and a half of bottle of whiskey. Carol handed me a plate with a tiny smile and I grabbed the seat farthest from the others. I was mentally exhausted from the day's events. The black hole of poisoned thoughts was still filling my mind too. Sitting here now, with the sun gradually turning the orange sky black, it was hard to keep them away. The memories weren't the only thing buried down in that hole. All the self-doubt, criticism, threats that I had received throughout my life were buried in there. The vile words that were thrown at me twenty-four hours a day by Oriax were there, and those were the ones I feared the most.

I picked at the rabbit leg, pulling little strands of meat off. I barely noticed when Dale took a seat next to me I was so focused on the food. "Not hungry?" he asked mimicking the concern of an old grandfather. I shrugged my shoulders in response, forcing a chunk of meat down my throat. I was hungry when I sat down, but the nausea that plagued me from the day before was back. There was light conversation around the camp, but Dale and I were quiet. "Can I ask you something?" Dale asked politely. I gave a tired sigh looking at the old man, "Sure." "That knife of yours, the one with the symbols on it, where did you get it?" I looked at the man with surprise. I didn't let anybody touch that knife. Dale saw my shock, quickly explaining. "We have your weapons in the RV with the others." That was the last defense I had against the demons and I couldn't afford to lose it, much less leave it in the hands of these people. "Picked it up along the way," I answered for him. What was I supposed to say? _Oh, we stole it from this backstabbing, manipulative, demon after we killed her with it. _"You just found it?" he asked with suspicion. "Yep, just found it."

My head burned with pain. I was done with socializing. I left Dale with my vague words and went to my tent. The flickering of light in the distance caught my attention. I squinted into the now dark night and realized it was Daryl's camp. A part of me wanted to go to him, explain the note, and my actions the right way, but I couldn't even sort out my own thoughts at the moment. I brushed it off, leaving it for another day.

_Blood everywhere. Why couldn't I stop it? "I need more towels," I called out into the dead silence. I wiped my forehead of the trickle of sweat and felt the sticky fluid stain my skin. Wads of pristine white towel were placed in front of me and I grabbed them quickly trying to staunch the flow of blood. My hands shook as I pressed them into the wound, the cotton fabric slowly soaking the entire cloth. "E-Ellen, I-I need you to hold this, I need to find something to fix this," I stuttered out, trying to avoid Jo's paling face and blood streaked hair. She stepped in immediately, putting on a strong face for her girl. _

_I walked away, my hands trembling incessantly as I checked for some type of medical kit. I didn't find anything and instead searched the store for fish hooks, wire, anything that could act like a needle and thread. I could sew her up. She's going to be fine. I walked up and down the aisles feverishly until I ran smack into Dean's back. "Sorry," I mumbled walking around him. I couldn't look him in the eye. I knew I would see heartbreak and I wasn't ready to accept this as the end for Jo. I stalked through the store, finding some super thin wire and safety pins. _

_Jo was slouched against the checkout counter, her skin a ghostly white, and her eyes glassy and distant. "Hey, hang in there for me, I'll have you patched up in no time," I said with a forced smile. Jo grabbed my arm, her hands ice cold. "No, it's no use. Even if you fix me up, I can't walk. I can barely feel my legs as it is." "We'll carry you then," Dean's voice echoed. A sad smile graced Jo's lips as Sam stood next to Dean. "Those hell-hounds will be on us the second we leave. I'll just weigh you down," she said, her voice weakening with the blood loss. Ellen was barely hanging on, her eyes swimming with tears. "The bombs you were talking about, I'll blow them while you guys escape." "No, we can all get out of here together," I countered stubbornly. Jo could barely shake her head as she spoke up once more, "I'm not getting out here, guys. Let me do this." _

_I clenched my jaw against the burning in my eyes. We set off grabbing supplies for the bombs. We could barely look at each other, knowing that we were about to let a dear friend die to save us. Dean and Sam finished tying them together and brought Jo the detonator. Ellen sat next to her daughter, a blank look on her face. Jo's grip was so weak she could barely hold the button. Ellen wrapped her hand around the button with her daughter and I knew that she wasn't leaving with us. There were silent goodbyes whispered from all of us. I leaned in and gave Jo a quick kiss on the forehead. "Don't party too hard up there without me," my words coming out in between a laugh and choked sob. _

_Jo fought the tears and managed to pull me closer, whispering, "Take care of Dean for me." I nodded. We left out the fire escape and were down the street when it exploded. The flames lit up the entire town. The three of us stared in grief, but all I could see was blood everywhere. There was so much I was drowning in it. It was Jo's, Abby's, Bailey's, Trey's, Steve's, Mom's, Dad's, everyone's blood. I could see Sam and Dean running, but the blood pulled me deeper under its surface. Red everywhere as I took one last breath before mine mixed with it. _

I woke with a tired sigh. It was the third nightmare tonight. I had been asleep barely thirty minutes before I watched my friend hold her guts in with nothing but a few towels. I sat up, stepping into my boots. The night sky sparkled with shiny stars. I grabbed my old hunting knife and started towards the field from earlier. Somebody was on watch above the RV, but I didn't bother to check who. I took a seat at the edge of the large field, my knees pulled to my chest. I tried to stop the aching in my chest but there was nothing to stop it. I hoped that some fresh air would clear my mind, but the longer I sat awake the more time I had to think.

My mind was screaming, deafening the sounds around me. I wanted to scream, anything that would stop the noise, let it all out. You would think I did enough screaming, that it was all out, but I didn't rid myself of anything. All I did was open that box and let them loose. I fell on my back, looking up into the night sky. A bottle of whiskey would be nice. Get drunk enough to just pass out, my mind so clouded with booze I wouldn't be able to dream. Fuck, I'd take anything right now if it meant I could silence myself.

But, there was nothing. I was left to cope and I just couldn't do it. There was so much to deal with it was overwhelming. Tears sprang to my eyes, leaking down my face. How was I going to live like this? The tears came harder, and silent sobs wracking my body. Carol was right, I couldn't do this alone.

**Daryl's POV**

I was walking around the edge of my camp, trying to ease my mind. The mysterious man still invading my thoughts. I saw her walk out and into the grassy field alone. The moon was fully round, lighting up the dark night. She looked exhausted as she sat with her knees to her chest, her shoulders slumped. I was coming out of the woods this morning when I saw her sitting with Carl in the same field. I watched from afar, seeing her lost in that mind of hers even as she spoke with the boy. I thought about going to talk to her, but I could see in the way she talked with the others that she wasn't okay. The others seemed to believe her act, but I saw right through it.

I didn't have to talk to her to know she was different now, vulnerable. It was the way she hugged herself as she walked, her head lowered to the ground. But she would act tough, masking the pain inside because she refused to be weak. I knew the feeling.

Aria lay back in the grass, her gaze fixed upwards. It was late in the night and I could only assume that she was having nightmares. I walked my camp a few more times, each time stealing a glance her way. She never moved and the thought kept coming back. _Go talk to her. _It was the first day she was out and I was afraid she was different. I wish I could be angry at her, ignore her, but all I could think about was holding her in my arms.

I hated the feeling. I hated the ups and downs my emotions suffered through. But she was like a drug. The more I dabbled with it the more I wanted. I wanted to know more, kiss her more, hold her more, and just be with her. She was the only thing my mind could think of and I knew I needed to man up and talk. I made another round, and Aria was still there. _Should I go? _I bit at my thumb, watching her still figure in the dark. I gripped the strap of my crossbow and started towards her.

The muffled sound of crying was barely audible as I could finally make out her face in the dark. Her entire body shook with the sobs and it hurt to see her so broken. Her body was curled in on itself, trying to silence her breakdown. I stood a few steps away but she was too caught up to notice me. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to deal with tears, especially women and tears. That need to comfort her burned within me, but how was I supposed too? I stood there like an idiot, biting on my thumb nail.

It was the whispered, "Make it stop," that cracked me. I couldn't watch her suffer like this knowing the kind of girl she was. It was devastating to see somebody so strong break like this. I kneeled beside her, pulling her into my chest. I wrapped my arms around her shaking shoulders, letting her bury her face in my chest, her hands balled up in my vest. Her quiet words were barely audible, but I could hear them loud and clear. I rubbed her back, the action coming naturally. I don't even think she was aware of me, but the shaking started to calm, along with the violent sobs. The breakdown ended and Aria was soundly asleep in my arms. I didn't think twice as I lifted her up effortlessly in my arms, moving back to my tent. I could have taken her back to hers, but I wanted to have her near me. I wanted to do this for her, even if she woke up tomorrow and acted like nothing happened, because she needed to see she was wrong. She had to know that she was what made this world bearable, better, for me.

**Aria's POV**

Imagine getting whacked with a shovel; the metal blade connecting with your skull, causing a ringing in your ears and rainbow dots to blur your vision, then the pain. You feel the swelling of your brain pushing against the cushiony brain fluid and pressing against the bone of your skull. As my senses gradually came to me, that's how I felt. I could remember getting hit with a shovel, and it was probably the worst kind of head pain I ever experienced. It was basically like a metal bat to the face. I groaned as I opened my eyes. The glow of the sun was draining in through the fabric of the tent, causing a burning pain in my eyes. My eyelids felt like rolls of dough from the puffiness. Another loud groan escaped me as I pulled myself up into a seating position.

_This is not my tent. _I look around at the contents of the tent. There was a single pillow, a few blankets, and a beige backpack. _Daryl's tent. _My headache grew more painful. I remember crying in the field and then nothing. Daryl must have seen me, scooped me up, and brought me back here. _I don't deserve him. _I hurt him, yet here he is coming to my rescue.

I stood up cautiously, my head pounding with the movement. I couldn't hide away all day; I would eventually have to see him, might as well get it over with. I stepped out of the tent, an autumn chill welcoming me with a cold hug. Daryl was seated by a dead fire oiling his crossbow with his shop rag. "About time you're up," he called out as I came towards him. His eyes were focused on his task, his lips pressed into a thin line. His hair was darkening to a light brown, and the short cropped hair was growing out, some strands long enough to cover his eyes.

I stood awkwardly, watching him work. I didn't know what to say. I should apologize, but what if he didn't forgive me? I didn't think I would be able to handle that. It would just be another guilt I would carry. "I ain't gonna bite, girl, sit already," his southern drawl full of authority. I took a seat at the edge of the fallen log, keeping my distance. He didn't seem mad, but sometimes with Daryl you never knew. The silence was thick between us, making me squirm with discomfort. I hated this. I hated knowing that we were like this because of me. "I'm sorry." He stopped, his eyes still fixed on the weapon in his hands. "I know I hurt you. I never meant too. I just…" A low sigh escaped me as I tried to form the words in my mind. "I knew that if I told you face to face, I wouldn't be able to leave, I would break down and I didn't want to deal with it all. I didn't want you to see how messed up I am." A stubborn tear fell, leaving a trail in its wake. I wiped the tear away, Daryl's silence only adding to my paranoia.

"I told myself over and over again that I couldn't be with you because you would get hurt. I always figured it would be something else, not me that would hurt you. But I was selfish. I wanted to be with you because you knew. I don't know how to explain it, but you always knew what I needed." I dropped my head in sadness, my voice dejected. "You said that you could fix me, and I believed you. I thought maybe I could let it go, move on. But I was wrong. Daryl, I'm too damaged. Nobody can help me because I can't let people in. It's my fault I'm this way."

I could hear the voices in my head, repeating my words, but I didn't feel relieved I only felt heavier. Somewhere inside me was a voice screaming that these words were wrong, but that voice was drowned out. Daryl gripped my chin firmly, pulling my face up to look into his piercing blue eyes. "None of this is your fault, do you understand?" His words harsh as his expression remained stony. His fingers tightened their hold on my chin, "Do you understand?" he asked firmly. I nodded, but he shook his head, those blue eyes never leaving mine. "Say it." "I understand." His hold on me loosened, but he still held my face. "I'm not going to give up on you and let you walk away. I've let everyone in my life walk away. I'm not letting you do the same," his southern voice full of conviction. His eyes glowed in determination. "You're not broken. You're not some damn toy that needs fixing. You're a survivor, a fighter. Survivors don't give up." He stopped, and there was a battle inside him. The silence stretched on, but I didn't dare break it.

"I won't let you give up," his words soft. His blue eyes swam with emotion. Daryl leaned forward, pressing his sun dried lips to mine. The kiss was tender, yet powerful as he poured everything he could into it. Those nagging voices faded away and as Daryl's arms found their way around my waist I felt strong enough to fight, to survive once again. I didn't need to leave; everything I needed was sitting right beside me with his arms wrapped around me.


	22. Chapter 22

***Hi again. Here's the new chapter and I hope you enjoy it. It's mostly centered on the episode of _Judge, Jury, Executioner._ So, most of this is not mine, just Aria's thoughts. Thanks for your love and support of this story.***

**Daryl's POV**

I slammed my fist into the kid's face, the sickening sound of flesh beating flesh echoing in the wooden shack. I punch again and again, the kid lying on the floor with a bloodied face, whimpers crying out through his bloodied mouth. "I-I told you," he breathed out between heavy breaths. I grabbed him by the shoulders pulling him up right. "You ain't told me shit!" I yelled, slamming his weak body against the wall. "I barely knew those guys," he whined. "How many in your group?" I asked pacing back and forth. He looked lazily at the ground, stuttering. I waited as long as my patience could and pulled out my hunting knife. He noticed and quickly started stammering, "Oh no man. No, no, please."

Rick and Shane tried to talk to the kid, but he wouldn't spill. They came to me asking to get some answers, well this was getting answers. I slammed the knife into the wood-paneled floor, mere inches from his leg, our faces only a foot apart. "How many?" I growled. "Uh, uh, thirty. Thirty guys." "Where?" The kid continued to stutter and I ripped the tattered pant leg aside, grabbing the medical white tape and ripping it off the stitched wound, pulling a pained scream from the boy.

"I don't know! I swear!" he ground out through the pain. "We were never in a place for more than a night." I needed to go farther. The kid was still holding information back and I needed to know every last detail to keep everybody outside safe, to keep Aria safe. I pressed the hilt of the knife into the scabbed wound, and the kid continued to weep in fear. "Are you scouting, scoping the area? Plan on staying local?" I asked watching the kid's blood streaked face. "I-I don't know. They left me behind," his voice dripping with desperation. "You ever pick off a scab before?" my knife digging a little deeper into the wound, twisting slightly. "Come on man! I'm trying to cooperate." "You start off real slow, sooner or later you just gotta rip it off," I said pushing the weapon deeper, planning to peel the ugly scab off.

"Okay!" his voice dropped in defeat, "Okay, the-they have weapons, heavy-duty stuff; automatics, those kinds." I kept my grip firm on his leg, keeping the pressure on the knife. The kid's panic continued to spike as I never moved the knife. "But, but I didn't do anything!" he cried out. "You shot at my boys, my girl, trying to take this farm. You telling me you were just along for the ride? That you were innocent?" "Yes!" I watched his panicky face as he slowly started to spill more about his group. "These people took me in. Not just guys, but a whole group of them. Men and women, kids too, just like you guys." I pulled the knife away standing back up as he continued to spill. "Thought I would have a better chance with them, you know?" The kid stopped, his eyes taking on this faraway look. "But, the leader he would send us out to scavenge. Only the men and one night we found this little camp site. It was just a man and his two daughters; teenagers, real young, real cute."

My blood ran cold; I turned towards the kid, eyes squinted in hostility as he continued on. "The dad had to watch while the leader and these guys...they...and they didn't even kill him afterwards, they just made him watch. The leader just had this...this smile, and his eyes, they were black, like evil black…the entire eye" The kid finished staring off as he remembered. My fists clenched and unclenched as I waited for him to finish. I just watched him with hate filled eyes. He finally looked up and that panic came flooding back. "But, but, I never touched them, nuh-uh.. I never…" I struck out and kicked him right in the gut, sending him to the ground moaning.

But it wasn't satisfying. I wanted to keep beating till I made him feel whatever that father felt, what those girls felt. "Please, man, you, you gotta believe me, you gotta," He begged in between labored breaths. I listened, watching him with heated contempt. "I ain't like that," he cried over and over, but I didn't believe him. He watched it happen, he could have stopped them. He was just as much a part of it as the others. He continued to beg, but I made up my mind. I kicked again, catching his side sending him to the floor once more, and I punched his bloodied face till my knuckles bled and the anger subsided.

I left the kid a moaning, crying heap on the floor. My fists ached, and my hands were covered in dried blood. I threw on a long button up over my sleeveless one, and my winged vest to cover it up. I grabbed my crossbow by the door and left without a look back. Everyone was gathered at camp, waiting. This kid had to go. There was no way he could stay at the farm with us. They either sent him on his way to fend for himself out there or they killed him. I considered him just as dangerous as the men in his group.

Disgust and rage filled me with what he said. If Rick and Shane couldn't sort it out then I would. I wasn't going to let anyone hurt these people, and definitely not my girl. Aria stood beside Carol, her hair tied into a long braid. She wore a faded red waffle shirt and a white and blue plaid button up over it. The sleeves were rolled up, the shirt only slightly big on her. Her big green eyes were on me as I came into camp, my crossbow hanging off my shoulder.

"Boys got a gang, about thirty men, and heavy artillery. They ain't looking to make friends," looking Rick in the eyes as I said it. He needed to make the right call here. "They roll through here the men are dead, the women they're gonna wish they were." I couldn't help but let my gaze fall on Aria. Her face was blank, absorbing the information. I didn't see any fear in her eyes, but after what she's been through it's hard to imagine what she would be scared of. Carol's motherly eyes were watching me closely as she questioned, "What did you do?" her eyes glued to my knuckles wrapped around the strap of my crossbow. "Had a little chat."

Carol looked angry as she turned away and left us. "Was there anything else?" Rick asked. "No, the kid was probably doped up on something though." I couldn't get the fear in his eyes out of my head when he talked about the leader. He was definitely lost in his thoughts, but there was true fear behind his words when he spoke of the man. "Why do you say that?" Aria asked, her curiosity peaking. "Kid went off on this tangent, talking about the leader having black eyes, must have been eaten some shrooms along the way and was trippin." Aria's face went pale. "What exactly did he say about the eyes?" she questioned urgently. Everybody's attention fell on her, but she was focused on me, waiting for an answer. Her body was rigid, a heightened sense of alertness in her eyes. "I don't know, just said they were all black or something." I didn't understand why she was so interested.

She huffed in agitation and took off in a run towards the shack. "What the hell?" Shane barked. I followed after her, Rick and the others behind me. "Aria!" I called out, but she didn't stop. She was a good runner and had a big lead on us. She reached the shack, whipping the door open, and storming in. Seconds later, I hit the shed and was inside my crossbow aimed. She was crouched in front of the kid, speaking harshly, a knife to his throat. "Tell me exactly what you saw?" she questioned. Rick and Shane crashed in, but stopped when they saw her questioning him. "I-I don't know what you want me to tell you," he stammered, his brown eyes flickering between her and the knife at his throat. She grabbed his hair and slammed his head into the wall forcefully.

"Tell me about his eyes." Fear captured the kid once again as he stared at her. "You believe me?" he questioned in shock. She had little patience with the kid and pushed the blade harder against the soft skin of his throat. "Okay, okay, um they were black, the entire eye. It just kind of glazed over and then they went back to normal like mine. I said something to one of the guys, but they just said I was crazy, and…" She pulled on his hair, silencing his little rant. I kept my crossbow aimed towards the kid. I just wasn't comfortable with her being that close to him even though he was bound. "Did you see anybody else's eyes do that?" He shook his head, his large eyes glued to her. "Was there anything weird he asked of you?"

I didn't understand why she wanted to know about this guy so much. But the way she persisted and the tension in her body said there was a reason to worry. "I don't know," he whined, squirming against the blade. "Well think or else you're going to lose this," she threatened, grabbing hold of his ear and placing the blade against it. "No, please, please, alright, alright, um, um, it was vague but he said that there was a group. When we scavenged we were to keep an eye out for. Small group, he said three guys and a girl, they would be in this old black car, but nobody ever looked for them. We just kind of figured he was crazy you know."

"Did he give names, how were you supposed to know it would be them?" He swallowed fearfully, his Adam-apple bobbing up and down. "Said one guy would be wearing a trench coat, but I don't remember the rest. I swear, please, you gotta believe me, please," he begged. Aria shoved him back against the wall and left without a word. She stormed out, shoving Shane and Rick out of the way and towards our camp on the outskirts of the farm.

Everybody was confused. It had been a week since the breakdown and she was doing better. I mean she still woke every night with bad dreams, and she would zone out, lost in her mind, but she wasn't falling into a sobbing fit. Carol seemed to be helping her, some of the others too. But even from the support of everyone there was still that vulnerability. She didn't have the same confidence as before. She stayed quiet, keeping her opinions to herself. But today was like the old Aria, that spark of fierceness reignited, along with the mystery; a damn maze.

Rick and Shane finally caught up to her, stopping her. The others stayed behind, trying to give her some privacy. Nobody wanted to be a part of another breakdown. Her arms were crossed, her lips pressed tightly, and a look of defiance on her face. I caught her eye as I stood beside Rick. "What was that all about?" he asked calmly. "It was nothing. You don't have to worry about it," she said dismissively. "That wasn't nothing, now tell us why you wanted to know?" Shane asked a hint of hostility in his voice. Her glare darkened at his voice, "None of your fucking business." I could see Shane fighting to control himself and I stepped in. "She don't want to talk about, let's just leave it," I snapped at the two men. Rick nodded in understanding. We worried about another breakdown, even I did. So, we tried to give her space. When she was ready to talk she would.

When the two cops left, Aria's body eased. "I can't tell you about it. One day, but right now you're better off not knowing. Trust me when I say this, you don't want to know unless you have too," She explained her green eyes boring into mine. I nodded and we headed back to the others. We still needed to decide on Randall's fate. "I don't see any other option here," Rick explained to the others. Dale looked panicked among the group of calm faces. "He's a threat and we have to eliminate the threat." "So, we're just gonna kill him?" Dale asked with disbelief. "We'll do it today," Rick explained and turned away from us. Dale took off after him, the rest of us leaving it to Rick and Shane to handle. There wasn't anything else to say.

"Come on," I said, resting my hand against the small of Aria's back as I guided her back towards our camp. The questions burned in my mind, but I didn't ask. Aria had her reasons for keeping things secret. It may drive me crazy, but she would tell me eventually. She was lost in her thoughts again, a faraway look in her dark green eyes. "I think I'm going to go find Carol. She wasn't too happy earlier after seeing you come back with bloodied fists." I gave her a silent nod and she stretched up, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before we went our separate ways. I knew she was going to explain to Carol why I did what I did, and I was grateful for that. Carol was still softhearted and she didn't understand this world very well, but having her friendship meant a lot to me. I felt like I needed to look out for her, and in turn she did the same for me. She looked out for both Aria and me, kind of like a mother hen. I made it back to my camp, the Georgia sun warm against the breeze.

I gathered a few of my new arrows, checking the tips and feathered fletching. Aria and I were still staying away from the others, fending for ourselves. We liked it better away from them. We were used to being on our own, and there was constant drama with the others. I was attaching the arrows to my crossbow when I looked over to see Dale coming towards me. "Ugh, the reason I moved up here was to get away from you people," I said frustrated with the man's presence. "Well, it's gonna take a lot more than that." "Carol, send you?" I asked rubbing my thumb over the wooden tip. Carol was a bit overprotective worrying over Aria and me, so I wasn't too surprised Dale was up here. "Carol's not the only one that's worried about you. Your new role in the group," Dale said with distaste. This wasn't about trying to prove myself to these people. The kid was a threat and I had to protect my own. "I'm better off protecting my own." "You act like you don't care," Dale said. "That's cause I don't," I replied offhandedly.

I snatched my crossbow up with the three arrows, slinging it over my shoulder. "So, live or die you don't care what happens to Randall?" "Nope." "Then why don't you stand with me? Try and save the kid's life, if it doesn't matter one way or another?" I was annoyed with the constant questions. Didn't the old man get it? I didn't care as long as the kid wasn't able to hurt this group. "I never pegged you for a desperate son of a bitch." Dale brushed the comment off, "Your opinion matters." "Man, nobody is looking at me for nothin'," I said trying to get Dale to back off. I started towards the woods, the old man following. "Aria looks up to you, Carol. I look up to you, right now. You obviously have Rick's ear." I turned back to the old man, "Rick just looks to Shane, let him," My words rough and harsh. Dumb cop didn't see what kind of man Shane was because he thought he was his friend. He wanted to listen to the deputy, fine. I just needed to look out for me and Aria.

"You cared what happened to Sophia, cared what it meant to the group." I stopped, coming back towards Dale as he continued on. "Torturing people? That isn't you. You're a decent man," Dale stated with conviction. "So is Rick. Shane is different." "Why do you say that? Cause he killed Otis?" I asked. Dale's eyes widened with surprise. "Did he tell you that?" He questioned back his eyes hungry for evidence to prove his suspicions right. "He told some story. How Otis covered him and saved his ass, came back with a dead gun's gun." It wasn't hard to figure out. Even Aria had said his story was crap that he was covering something up. "Rick isn't stupid. The only reason he hasn't figured it out is because he doesn't want to."

I thought Rick was a good guy. He'd done good by me, so far, but he was blind to Shane's actions. Rick had my support, but Shane, that guy was tearing this group apart while Rick was trying to pull everyone together. "It's like I said, the group's broken." I turned and headed straight for the woods. It was only a matter of time till Rick saw Shane's true colors. I just hoped for our sake it wasn't too late.

**Aria's POV**

I stood on the wooden deck, staring down into the green-blue water. I took a tired deep breath, looking up into the sunny blue sky. I didn't know what to do. _Three guys and a girl. One would be wearing a trench coat. _For once, I was glad Cas wasn't around. Randall would have seen him and then what? What if Rick and Shane did let him go and he found his group? _"Crowley said he had big plans for you." _My skin broke out in bumps at the thought. If the brothers were here we would be on our way to that camp. But I was alone. Who knew how many demons had invaded that camp? I followed the white puffs in the sky, before closing my eyes. "Cas, there's a demon and I could use some backup. He's looking for us, telling people to keep an eye out." I waited, knowing deep down he wouldn't show like always.

"Just a head's up. Guess I'll just figure it out on my own," I ended bitterly stalking back to camp. I knew I had people now to help me, but I still felt alone. The group couldn't help me and I was left to deal by myself. I broke through the thicket of trees, catching the backside of the white farmhouse. Camp was empty except for T-Dog on watch. I was by the large oak tree when Dale called out to me. I turned to see him walking up the slight hill, a rifle over his shoulder, and his fishing hat. "What's up?" "I'm talking to everybody, getting them to stand against Rick's decision to kill Randall." "I saved him once, what happens next isn't my problem," I explained.

Dale's old eyes were full of disbelief. "So, you saved him just for him to die?" "He was already dead, Dale. I gave him a few more days to live, to make peace," I retorted. "Why not give him more time? He's just a kid for Christ's sakes. Doesn't he deserve as much of a chance as us?" Maybe it was an act of self-preservation? If Randall was dead I wouldn't have to worry about that demon ever finding me. I wouldn't have to worry about this group being attacked. It was selfish and wrong, but the kid chose to attack us. They could have just walked away, he could have walked away, it's not like he was forced to shoot at us. We tried to reason with them and they fired first. "He had a chance. He chose to kill people. They fired on us first. Daryl was right when he said their group wasn't trying to make friends. All they want is what we have."

Dale oozed desperation. "But don't you see, if we kill him how are we any better than his people?" I shook my head, "Look, kill him or send him away, he can't stay here." I walked away leaving Dale to continue his hopeless campaign.

A soft pink glow rained down from the sky, a misty blue hiding behind the forest tops till it was time. Daryl and I walked towards the house, watching as Rick ushered the others inside. Everybody gathered in the front room. We all stood in a circle, Daryl and I behind Rick close to the entrance door. The room was heavy with a dreaded silence. Small footsteps were heard and I caught Carl standing in the hallway. Everybody watched him leave as Rick gave a nod of his head. He didn't need to be a part of this. It wasn't about him being too young, but trying to keep that last shred of innocence he had.

"So, how do we do this? Take a vote?" Glenn asked solemnly. "Does it have to be unanimous?" "How about majority rules?" "Hold on a sec, let's just see where everybody stands. Then we'll talk through the options," Rick intervened settling the anxious group. "Well, the way I see it there's only one way to move forward," Shane explained, his hand tightening on his belt as he leaned back against the fireplace a look of boredom on his face. "Killing him." Dale scanned the room with a look of failure in his tired face. "Right? I mean why even bother, we know which way the wind's blowing," his words full of defeat.

"If people think we should save him, then I want to know," Rick demanded. He was struggling to do the right thing for us and what he believed in. "Well, it's a small group, just me and Glenn," Dale said with a frown, his fishing hat rolled up tight in his hands. Glenn looked up to the man, a look of apology written all over him. Dale's face crumbled at the betrayal. "Look, I think you're usually right about everything, but…" "They got you scared!" Dale yelled. "He's not one of us," Glenn explained. "And we've lost too many people already," he added glumly.

A silence fell upon us. That's why we couldn't give Randall a chance. That 'what if' was too great. If he killed somebody, escaped and brought his group here, we would lose more people. "What do you think?" he asked Hershel and Maggie. Hershel kept his gaze down, ashamed to even take part in this discussion. "Could we continue to keep him prisoner?" Maggie asked directing her question towards Rick. "Just another mouth to feed," Daryl stated. "We don't know how bad winter could be either," I added. "We could ration better," Lori offered. "Or he could be an asset. Give him a chance to prove himself," Dale fought.

"Put him to work." "We're not letting him roam freely." "We could put an escort on him." "Yeah, and who wants to do that?" Shane scoffed. "I will," Dale offered without hesitation. He was working so hard to fight for what he believed in, but nobody felt the same. "Okay, let's say we let him join us. Maybe he's useful, hell, maybe he's nice. We let our guard down and he runs off and brings back his thirty men," Shane explained. I caught Daryl giving me a look from the corner of my eye. His blue eyes were full of protectiveness. I caught his stare, giving him an understanding look. Daryl had grown more protective over the last week. I knew he was just as worried about this possibility as I was. I reached out giving his hand a gentle squeeze. He didn't flinch at the contact and even squeezed back. I don't know if it was because of my breakdown, but there was gentleness to him when he was around me. My thoughts battled with each other, debating over his actions. _Were they in sympathy? Maybe he felt the same way?_

"So, we're going to kill him for something he may never do? If we do this we're saying there is no hope. That rule of law is dead, there is no civilization," Dale cried out. But it was. There was no room for civilization in this world. None of that mattered anymore. You did whatever you needed to protect yourself. "You're talking like it's already decided," Dale said, pulling me from my thoughts once again. "We've been talking all day. Just going around in circles, you want to keep going around in circles?" Daryl spoke up, agitation in his voice. He was right. It was the same conversation over and over. We weren't getting anywhere.

"This is a young man's life! It's worth more than a five-minute conversation!" The old man yelled desperation in his every word. "Is this what we've come to? We kill somebody because we don't know what to do with them? You two saved him," he said pointing Rick and me out. I had nothing to say as I listened to him rant on. I already went through this. "Now look, he's been tortured, he's gonna be executed. How are we any better than those people we're so afraid of?" The group was silent, their eyes heavy with burden. _Well, they have a possessed leader, that's one difference. _I was being harsh, not everybody in that group was bad. Randall could be a good kid, but I just wasn't willing to stand with Dale and take that risk. It's survival of the fittest.

Andrea and Rick were arguing and I couldn't take it anymore. "Give me the keys," I said stepping forward. Everybody stopped their yelling, looking at me. "What? You want an option, here it is. Give me the keys, I'll drive the kid out and leave him. We're wasting time sitting here talking about the same thing over and over. Either put a bullet in his head or give me the keys." I could see the doubt fill everyone's faces at my plan, but nobody else would do it. In my mind these were the only two options people were happy with. "Nobody's going anywhere by themselves," Rick stated firmly. "I wouldn't go by myself Rick. I'm giving you an option to solve this. Why is it so unreasonable? Is it because you and Shane beat the shit out of each other last time?" I asked caustically.

We weren't stupid; we all knew they got into some fight. That's probably what brought the walkers on in the first place. This could have been done the right way the first time if Rick would just realize that Shane was dangerous. Not just to him but all of us. The two men didn't say anything. "That's not the point. Anything could happen out there. It's too dangerous," Rick countered with finality. "Fine, then decision made. We kill him," I replied simply. "But, but don't you see," Dale started, pleading desperately. "If we do this the people we were the world that we knew is dead. And this new world is ugly, harsh; it's survival of the fittest." He looked around at the worn faces. "It's a world that I don't want to live in. And I don't believe any of you do." "We don't have a choice Dale. Whether we're fighting other people or walkers this is the hand we've been dealt. You do what you have to and hope to live to fight another day," my words solemn as I looked into his watery brown eyes. We weren't killing because we wanted to; it was because we had to. I couldn't let Walt and Roy go or else they would have attacked another group, killing innocent people.

"So, nobody is going to stand with me?" Only Andrea spoke up while the rest of us kept our gazes lowered. Rick waited, letting a heavy silence drag on. I watched Dale's eyes swim with tears as he lost his battle. "Are you all gonna watch too?" he asked shaking his head lightly with shame. "No, you all go hide your heads in your tents, while you try and forget that we're slaughtering a human being. I won't be a party to it," he finished, his words thick with emotion as he came towards Daryl and me. He gripped Daryl's shoulder. "You were right, this group is broken," he said loud enough for the others to hear. I watched the old man go, listening to the screen door bang against the wooden frame as he exited. A sorrowful sighed passed my lips. I wished this world could be different. I wish I could have that same hope Dale did, hope that this kid was good. But I had seen it happen too many times before. Ruby, Samuel, Gordon, they were all people we thought would help us and then they turned on us. I couldn't take that risk again. If it meant I was going to Hell, well so be it, I'd rather be ripped to pieces every day than know I could have prevented the death of good people.

Daryl and I stood side by side, our shoulders touching as we leaned against the old shed. The night was cool, making you yearn for that Styrofoam cup full of black liquid bliss. What I would give for a warm cup of coffee just to warm my belly. Daryl was biting at his thumb, his eyes fixed on the ground in thought. I knew he was thinking about what we were about to do, whether it was right or wrong. "You want to talk about it?" I asked catching his eyes in the sliver of moonlight. "Talk about what? Gotta do what we gotta do," he said simply, staring down the field as Rick and Shane came down the dirt path.

The former officers didn't say a word as they saw us. There was no need for words, as Daryl and I pushed off the shed and led the two men inside. Rick was carrying a small lantern, lighting up the dark room as Daryl gripped Randall's arm, lifting the kid to his feet roughly. "Hey, hey what's going on?" the kid questioned with panic. No words were said as Rick and Shane led the way to the barn. Randall complained the whole way, moaning to slow down as he hobbled on his bad leg. As we came down the gravelled drive, Randall saw the large barn standing ominously in the distance

"Hold, hold on. Wait," he stuttered, his face full of uncertainty. He tried to stop walking, but Daryl would just shove him forward, his hand gripping the back of Randall's shirt. I kept beside Daryl as Rick pulled the enormous barn door open. Daryl pushed the reluctant kid in, causing him to stumble. Rick set the lantern in the corner, the small light illuminating only the entrance, casting our massive shadows on the walls. Daryl stood the kid in the middle of the space, stepping away as Shane came up behind him, a strip of black fabric in his hands. He wrapped his arms around his shoulders to stop his squirming. "This will all be over soon," Shane said blankly, tying the cloth around the kid's eyes. Randall panicked, his mouth running a mile a minute. "What's gonna be over soon? Hey, hey, no, no, NO, NO!" he began crying out, his voice full of despair as he stood with his eyes covered.

Daryl and I stood aside, watching as Rick took position in front of Randall. "Would you like to kneel or stand?" Rick asked trying to mask his discomfort as he watched the boy tremble in fear. "No, please," he begged between his tears as he heard the chamber shut on Rick's Python. Randall stood frozen, pleas falling from his busted lips. Daryl stepped forward, kicking the backs of Randall's knees causing the kid to stumble to the ground. Randall's breaths were short and fast as he hyperventilated. I stood with emptiness like that of a soulless person as Rick raised his weapon, leveling it with Randall's head. "Do you have any final words?" The sheriff questioned his voice empty, but his eyes swimming with doubt as Randall continued to beg for his life.

The Python was raised, the hammer pulled back, sounding the dreaded click. Rick stared down at the kid, his eyes hardened. "Do it, dad," Carl said, startling all of us. I turned around to see him watching his father intently. Shane stormed over immediately, dragging the young boy out. I turned back to see Rick, his hardened eyes now panicked and unsure. I could see him battling with himself and knew he couldn't do it. He didn't want Carl to lose that last shred of innocence. "Take him away," Rick ordered, holstering his gun. Daryl seethed with aggravation, giving the sheriff a look of total disappointment as he stepped forward and grabbed Randall. Shane stormed away, mumbling angrily to himself. I stepped up to Rick and gave him a squeeze on the shoulder.

Rick was a good leader, but he was faltering under the pressure the others put on him. It was a simple gesture, but I think he needed to know that somebody didn't think he was weak. Everybody would be pissed, but we would figure it out. Rick gave me the briefest of nods, and I left, leaving the father and son together.

I followed Daryl back to the shed. His muscles tense as he practically dragged the kid to the wooden structure. Randall continued to ramble on, the same words repeated over and over. I stood in the doorway, blocking out the pleas as Daryl tied him up. My body felt weak with exhaustion and I craved the chance to rest. The night seemed too peaceful for what was supposed to happen. Not less than ten minutes ago, a kid no older than nineteen was about to die, but nature carried on like it was nothing.

Crickets cried out in the moonlit night, sounding out a gently chorus till a scream ripped through the silence. The sound so shocking I was frozen in place as it pierced the air. Daryl brushed passed me, lantern in hand as he grabbed me a pulled me along into the fields. I pushed my legs so that I stayed right along Daryl as we hopped over the wired gate and into the field behind the barn.

Adrenaline pumped heavily through my veins, my breath coming out in fast misty puffs against the chilled air. Every scream brought forth memories of my past. I tried to focus on the one now, but my abused mind tortured me by replaying the same ones from my nightmares. The screaming became deafening as we found the walker. Daryl tackled the corpse, driving his knife through the skull. I barely caught my breath as I fell to my knees beside a pale-faced Dale. My hands ghosted over him as Daryl stood waving his hands back and forth shouting for the others.

His abdomen had been torn open like peeling open a zip-lock bag. His intestines, liver, and stomach were all exposed drowning in a sea of red. The flesh shredded to thin strands and hanging down inside him like streamers. _You can't fix this. _When I looked up from the wound I found Jo's pale face. I starred in shock as my mind played trick son me. The others had arrived, everybody distraught at the sight before them. Rick was almost hysterical as he crouched beside Dale. He started yelling for Hershel and then turned to me, his eyes wide with desperation. "What can we do?" I stared at the man with shock as his question sunk in slowly through the thick fog that now clouded my mind. _Nothing can fix this. _I shook my head, and Rick stood shouting. Andrea was opposite me, holding Dale's hand, tears dripping down her face.

I looked into his dying face and saw fear. Dale made a gurgled cry and I found the fog dispersing, my mind clearing. I reached out tenderly, stroking his balding head, whispering softly. I held his gaze in mine as soothing words fell from my lips. "Shh, shh, you'll be okay," I gave him a weak smile, a single tear trailing down my right cheek. "You'll be with your wife soon." He cried in agony, his eyes shutting against the pain. "He's suffering," Andrea pointed out between her sobs. "Do something," she begged. Rick stepped forward reluctantly, his hand shaking uncontrollably as he held the Python unsurely. I continued a gentle slew of comforting words, keeping Dale's eyes on me and off the gun in Rick's hand. His eyes left mine and I saw them widen. They were locked behind me, focused on nothing. My eyes shut in sympathy. _Death. _I could imagine the man in his crisp black suit, his cane held firmly in his slender fingers as he waited to take Dale's soul.

"He won't hurt you Dale," I whispered loud enough for his ears only. The old man looked at me with surprise, but I ignored it. "He's going to take you somewhere better, somewhere safe from all of this." Daryl kneeled beside Dale's head, Rick's gun in hand. We locked eyes and I gave him the lightest of nods. It was Sam and Dean all over again, but this time I was the onlooker. Dale's gaze drifted away from me to Daryl as he stared down the barrel of the gun. "Sorry, brother," Daryl murmured. I didn't flinch as Dale's writhing body became still. It was a chorus of pain that rang through the air. It hit everyone and we all starred. I shrugged out of my button up, placing it over the dead face of a man who was a father to all. A strong hand found a place on my shoulder and I looked up into a sea of ocean colored blue. I laid my hand over his, my fingers lacing with his. _Will this ever stop?_


	23. Chapter 23

***Hey, again. This is a big chapter, so much happens. I just want to warn you that there is rape involved in this chapter, so read with discretion. This story is rated M for a reason. Everything is going to pick up from here on out. Thank you all for reading and please feel free to drop a review.***

**Aria's POV**

Losing somebody was hard. It doesn't matter if you see it or you don't, that helplessness you feel knowing you couldn't do anything to stop it was crushing. But the truly agonizing part was the day after. You would think of something that would make them laugh. You'd turn to say it to them and then it would hit you that they're gone. Then you would realize that you can't remember what they look like. You have this idea, but there's always something missing. It was learning to live without them that were the hardest part of loss. To accept that you would never hear that all-knowing voice, hear them laugh, or feel that comforting gentle pat on the back. It was a giant hole where they used to be, a rock.

The sun rose tiredly. A soft pink glow easing its way over the tree tops, scaring away the darkness of night. The grave was fresh, the dirt a moist dark brown. It looked like the others, stones outlining it with a ring of them on top of the grave for flowers. I was dressed in a white thermal, a purple V-neck over it. The wind ghosted over us with frozen fingers, penetrating my layers. My nose was cold from the morning chill as we stood beside Dale's grave. Daryl and I stood away from the others, my eyes moving between the fresh grave and the half-sized one beside it.

"Dale could get under your skin. He sure got under mine. Because he wasn't afraid to say exactly what he thought, how he felt" Rick had dark bags under his eyes, his voice tired. "That kind of honesty is rare, and brave," he said his voice thick with unshed tears. "Whenever I would make a decision, I'd look at Dale. He'd be looking back at me with that look he had. We've all seen at one time or another." I remember his big brown eyes swimming with worry, trying to help me as I was drowning myself with whiskey. I tried to attack him when all he wanted to do was help me. "I couldn't always read him, but he could always read us. He saw people for who they were. He knew things about us, the truth; who we really are." I looked to Daryl and found him looking at me. His face was neutral and he didn't look away when I caught him. His eyes were light with thought and understanding.

"In the end he was talking about losing our humanity. He said this group was broken. The best way to honor him is to unbreak it. Set aside our differences and pull together." My gaze wandered to Shane as he looked to Rick. Shane wouldn't move on though. He was hungry for control. He lost control of the group, lost Lori and Carl, and he couldn't make me leave Daryl. We couldn't fix this group with Shane around. "Stop feeling sorry for ourselves. Take control of our lives, our safety, and our future. We're not broken. We're going to prove him wrong." I thought of Dean. Team free will he called us; making our own destinies. We never believed in fate because she was a cruel bitch. So, we were going to prove her wrong. Guess it was time to prove her wrong once more.

"From now on, we're going to do it his way. That's how we honor Dale," Rick finished, kneeling down and placing a single flower upon his grave. One by one people stepped forward, leaving a flower or saying their last words. Before I knew it, Daryl and I were the only two left. I was so tired of this. How many more graves needed to be dug? How much more pain could I endure? I may not have been close to Dale, but he was a part of this group, and this group had become my new dysfunctional family.

I felt drained like all the life had been sucked out of my mind and body. I barely felt the pain in my chest because of how constant it had become. My limbs felt heavy and all I wanted was to stop losing people. "Let's head back, girl." Daryl's hand pushed against the small of my back, nudging me towards the house. I let him guide me back, the warmth of his hand sending waves of comfort over me. The tiny gesture eased my crazy thoughts. "Thank you," I said catching the hunter off guard as his hand slipped away to grasp the strap across his chest. "For what?" he asked, eyes drawn in confusion. "Everything," I sighed out, "Being there even when I pushed you away, helping me be here and not stuck in my damn head."

Daryl was quiet, keeping his steps in time with mine. The doubts were beginning to start when he finally spoke, his words quiet, shy. "I wanted to." A giant smile graced my lips at the words. He would never truly understand what those words meant to me. For once, I didn't have to take care of myself and everyone around me, somebody wanted to take care of me. I reached up and placed a kiss on the corner of his lips. But Daryl had the same idea in mind and caught my lips with his. I could feel him smile against our interlocked lips. He pulled away looking into my forest colored eyes. He was watching me with an intense stare, his lips parted as if he had something to say. I waited curiously, but nothing ever came. He gave a shake of his head, a small smirk on his lips and nudged me forward. I didn't bother questioning it. Daryl would say what he wanted when he was ready.

The others were packing up camp, Rick and Hershel talking by the blue truck when we came up. "Fifteen people in one house, it's gonna be tight," Rick commented. "Don't worry about that, with the swamp parting and the creek drying up…" "And fifty cattle on the property, we might as well be ringing a damn dinner bell," Maggie explained cutting in for Hershel. "She's right. We should have moved you in a while ago," Hershel's expression filled with slight regret. "You let us stay in the first place, that was more than enough," I commented with gratitude. Hershel smiled lightly before him and Maggie made helped the others. Rick started shouting off orders to everyone, explaining where things were supposed to be and so on. Daryl and I waited patiently beside the blue truck with Shane as Rick pulled T-Dog over to explain about guard.

I tried to ignore the little glances Shane would shoot my way, his eyes boring into me. There was constant tension in the air when we were near each other, and some of the others were starting to notice. Daryl took a small step towards me, his hands clenched into fists around his crossbow strap. He noticed the looks Shane kept shooting my way and his protective instincts took over. I willed myself to let him do this, but at the same time, Daryl standing up for me made me look weak. Shane would think I needed someone to protect me and he would try to use that against me. I was avoiding every chance I could that would leave the two of us alone for fear of what he would try to do again.

"After we get this area locked down, Shane will assign shifts, while Daryl and I take Randall off sight and cut him loose," Rick explained to those around, giving a pointed look to Shane. _Finally, this will be done the right way. _I was glad Rick finally came to his senses and saw Shane as a risk. Daryl gave a quick nod, going off to grab his bike and the rest of our stuff from our camp. I stuck around grabbing anything that needed to come to the house and filling up the truck. "We're back to that now?" Shane asked, as I put a couple of cans of gas in the bed. "Right plan first time around, poor execution," Rick replied with the slightest shake of his head. I fought the urge to comment, knowing that it would only bring more heated glares from Shane. "Yeah, that's a slight understatement," Shane mumbled. "You don't agree, but this is what's happening; swallow it, move on." Rick sounded like he was scolding a young child as he and Shane went back and forth. "You know Dale's death and the prisoner are two different things," Shane countered. "Want to take Daryl as your wingman, be my guest."

I just watched the buzz cut cop as Rick walked off. Shane caught my gaze, the side of his face a nasty purple, red from the beating Rick gave him. I kept my eyes hard and empty. Shane didn't say anything as he broke the contact and walked off. Something about his eyes made me feel uneasy as I grabbed the last toolbox and closed up the truck. I couldn't quite figure out what it was, but it left a pit feeling in my stomach. I followed behind the blue truck as Glenn drove it up the gravel drive, ahead of Hershel and Rick.

"Aria!" Rick called out from behind. I slowed my steps, falling in step with him. "What's up?" "When I'm out with Daryl, I need you to help Hershel keep an eye around here." "Of course, but um what about your buddy Shane?" I asked wondering when this sudden distrust of Shane had come from in the Sheriff. "Well, Shane has a tendency to let things get out of hand, especially when he's all worked up." _Don't need to tell me that. _"So, you want me to babysit the hothead?" I questioned. Rick tried to hide the guilt he felt at not being able to trust his best friend. He gave an exasperated sigh and shake of his head, "I just need to make sure that every time I leave this farm, all hell isn't going to break loose." He needed somebody to step up and pick up the slack he couldn't. I knew how hard he was trying to keep this group together and that was the only reason I agreed. "Fine." "Thank you," he responded.

The house was bustling with people in and out carrying assorted baskets full of supplies. Daryl left our stuff by his bike, and I grabbed it, setting us up in a corner by the entrance of the living room. I couldn't box myself in with all these people. I needed to have a straight path to the exit god forbid anything happened, just natural for me. I never knew if what I hunted had followed me back to the motel room. I knew Daryl would appreciate it, he was the same way I; needing a quick escape, space from the others. The sound of a hammer hitting wood resounded through the air as I stepped out on the wrap around porch. I could just make out Daryl from on the roof of the shed where Randall was being held. He was at the back and I only caught a glimpse as he reached for a two by four.

_What was he holding back? _He wanted to say something earlier, but he stopped himself. I let my mind cloud with thoughts, watching the land sway with the wind. Lori was walking up from the windmill, her face tear streaked and a pained expression on her face. She walked up the steps, not even noticing me. She looked like she needed to talk. She had a lot on her plate, being stressed about the baby, keeping it healthy, and she had Shane and Rick problems. I knew she loved Rick; just by the way she looked at him when he wasn't looking. I wasn't big on talking about feelings, but Lori looked like she could really use someone.

"Want to talk about it?" I asked, startling her as she reached for the screen door. She looked puzzled at my question, but I just gave her a pointed look, saying I knew what was up. She came up beside me, letting her head fall in her hands. "I just don't what to do?" she whispered. "Keep that baby healthy, take care of your body," I said with conviction, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Let the boys figure out their problems." She frowned, her eyes brimming with tears. "But I'm the cause of their problems," she admitted with a sniffle. "You can't blame yourself for this Lori. You love Rick, Rick loves you. Shane just loves the idea of you," I explained. Lori turned her watery brown eyes on me. "I don't even know whose baby this is? How could Rick love me?" she asked choking back a sob. I wasn't shocked at the news. I knew from the minute I had stepped foot on the quarry that those two were a thing. To be honest they didn't hide it very well. "It doesn't matter whose kid it is, all that matters is the man who is going to raise him or her with pure love and adoration for the baby and its mother."

Steve wasn't there for me. He may have been my biological father and had his reasons for staying away, but he wasn't the one that raised me, that taught me how to survive. Mark did that for me. He was the only father I knew. He loved my mom and me unconditionally and it only grew more when my siblings were born. With Mark being an officer in the Army he wasn't always around, but it was more than I could ever ask for; knowing that while he was away he would be thinking of my mom and me, his family. The bad memories were working their way out of the depths of my mind and I forced myself to ignore them.

Lori gave me a tender smile, a small thank you falling from her lips as we split and went our separate ways. I walked the perimeter of the farm, letting my mind wander from good to bad. I watched the hussle and bussle of the house ease as evening came around. I walked aimlessly wandering over towards the woods by the shed. I could see Daryl, Rick and T-Dog sitting on the porch going over something, while Andrea went in and out of the house packing the truck with supplies. My feet carried me to the shed where Randall was being held and there was the faintest sound of voices. That didn't make sense. Uneasiness flooded me, but I pushed it aside, pulling my knife from my boot. The closer I got to the wooden structure, the more I began to worry. _What if he got loose? _The lock was undone hanging from the latch lazily. The voices spoke again, and my blood boiled. I swung the door open and found Shane in the middle of tying Randall's hands. "What are you doing?" I asked incredulously.

Shane's eyes were wild. Fear gripped me at the sight of the unhinged man. Shane charged me, knocking me down. I hit the ground with a groan, but managed to roll the both of us around, trying to get on top of him. But Shane was stronger. He got the upper hand, managing to pin my arms against the ground. "I'm done with you getting in my way," he hissed at me, his chest rising and falling. I struggled under his weight, fighting against the grip on my arms. "What do you plan on doing, huh? Killing him? You think that's going to win Rick back, win Lori's love," I spat. I immediately regretted my words as he punched me in the face. His fists were rapid, and I could feel my lip split under the contact, the skin on my cheek ripping open from the force.

My head pounded, but I managed to head butt him hard enough to hear the satisfying crunch of bone breaking. I threw him off me, struggling to get up and get help. Shane was out of control, but no one was here to stop him. I stumbled forward, but he slammed into me from behind smashing me against the wall where Randall had been chained. He spun me around quickly, catching me in the stomach with a few punches that left me coughing. I curled over, the pain radiating throughout my abdomen. I had my eyes squeezed shut when two hands gripped my neck. My air was cut off at once, leaving me to pull at his hands around my throat. "You're not leaving here alive," he grinned wickedly. "I'll just tell them the boy got loose, you came to check on him, and he strangled you to death." His fingers tightened, digging into my skin, gripping my windpipe. I couldn't breathe at all. My lungs burned from the lack of air. Shane's face was covered in blood as his broken nose gushed. Fuzziness formed at the edge of my vision, my eyes fluttering. _I'm going to die. _Black dots formed, my mind struggling to hang on with the lack of air.

I could feel the darkness coming when his hands released me. Air was pulled into my lungs so quickly my knees went weak and I nearly crumbled to the floor, choking. I wasn't coherent enough to realize that Shane was stilling holding me upright, pinned against the wooden boards. I tried to focus as the haze that filled my mind faded with the pace of a snail. The snapping of the button of my jeans, pulled me to reality, but I didn't have the same strength as before. He punched me in the face again, leaving me dazed. Shane's elbow was pressed against the base of my throat, making breathing slightly difficult. I struggled against him, trying to push him off, but he pressed his body firmly up against mine his hand sandwiched between us.

"Let's have some fun first," he whispered against my ear, licking from my throat up to my jaw where he gave a hard bite. "Don't...do this," I rasped out, my voice hoarse from the trauma. His hand slipped inside my panties, his fingers rubbing against me. I whimpered at the unwanted touch, while he assaulted my bruised neck with bites. My eyes shut, trying to keep the tears from falling. His fingers slid into me forcefully and a choked cry slipped my lips. I could feel his dick pressing against me and I was ready to give up. His lips found mine, forcing his tongue down my throat. He pulled away, turning me towards the wall and slammed my body against it. My face was pushed into the cold wood, my wrists pinned painfully in his hand. Shane's mouth was back at my ear his warm breath heavy as he rubbed against me from behind. A single tear fell as I heard the metal of his belt unclasp. _Block it out. _I focused on shutting myself into a dark room, away from everything. His mouth was on my neck again as he slid his hand down my pants once again. But then it was gone. I thought I had willed him away. The sound of grunting and the table's legs screeching against the floor pulled me into reality.

I opened my eyes and turned to see Shane being held by his shirt as Daryl's fists drilled into him. It was like a dream almost, like it was too good to be true. I stood cemented to the floor as I watched the two men fight. Daryl's fists were covered in blood, his blue eyes aflame with fury. I thought Daryl was going to knock him unconscious when Shane managed to sneak a jab in, catching Daryl right in the jaw. That was it. Shane charged Daryl, his arms wrapping around his waist as he lifted Daryl from the ground and flew out the door. I could hear Daryl grunt as he hit the unforgiving earth. Shane straddled him and all I could hear was the consistent sound of flesh hitting flesh. There was yells from the others as they finally noticed what was happening. I barely registered what I was doing as I stepped out of the shed, my gun in my hand and pressed the barrel to Shane's shaved head.

The cop stopped his assault, freezing all movements. "Aria!" Rick called out in alarm as he came sprinting to us. I barely noticed the others now gathered around the three of us, their faces tinged in shock and fear. "Aria, put the gun down!" Rick ordered. But I kept my cold green eyes locked on the wild brown ones below me. T-Dog stepped forward and I pulled the hammer back on my Beretta. Everyone halted, breathes stopping at the sound. "Don't do this, Aria. We can talk this out." Rick pleaded. "She's crazy man. She attacked me," Shane explained, his face pleading as he tried to look to his friend. Daryl fought under him. "Bullshit!" he hollered. "You were fucking raping her!" his voice fueled with rage, his nostrils flared, and his eyes full of daggers.

I could see the others taking in my appearance; my unbuttoned jeans, the red marks along my jaw. "She was pushing herself on me!" Shane defended. "I told her 'no' and she went ape shit, broke my fucking nose!" I remained silent, keeping my gun pressed firmly to his head, never once breaking eye contact. "Aria, talk to me. What happened?" "What's there to tell? You're going to believe this piece of shit!" Daryl shouted, but Shane pressed his knees deeper into Daryl's ribcage, making the hunter groan in discomfort. "If you don't tell me what's happening, I'm going to have to take his word for this," Rick's voice unwilling as he said those words. I wanted to scream everything that this asshole put me through. But I couldn't find my voice; all I could do was stare down the barrel of my gun at the eyes of an unhinged man.

"You won't do it. You're weak; the alley dog that nobody wants to touch with a ten-foot pole. I win," Shane whispered loud enough for only my ears. A victory gleam shone in his brown eyes. It was like Oriax all over again. _'You're broken, pet. Nobody is going to help you.' _ Fire filled my belly. _I won't let him win. _I pressed the barrel harder against his head, making sure to leave a mark. Shane's eyes seemed to lose that gleam and that's when I found my voice. "He's lying," I started my voice hoarse and dripping with hatred. "The night after the CDC, in the stairwell, he grabbed me. What was it you said, Shane? I'm a rabid dog that needs somebody that can put me in my place." I kept my eyes on him, showing my strength. "Then on our way back from looking for Sophia on the highway he attacked me. He pinned my arms to my lap, his other hand around my throat, telling me I needed a muzzle. He then tied my hands with a seatbelt and fucking molested me. But you didn't get far did you?" I questioned viciously pushing his head back with the gun. "He was trying to kill Randall, was going to pin my death on the kid. You almost got away with it too, but you wanted to finish what you started in the car. Stuck your damn hands down my pants," my words full of disgust.

There was nothing said, just the slight rustle of leaves as nature continued on. My hands shook my stomach twisting as I remembered his hands. But it was all out and it felt good watching Shane panic under me. I was in control now; all his lies were laid out in front of everyone. I wanted to pull the trigger so badly and I let my index finger trace longingly against it. _Why did he deserve to live? He was a monster._ I killed the things that were evil, why not kill him? I debated for a long time before finally lowering my gun. "Death would be a gift for you," I said and turned away from them all. I walked off towards the serenity of the woods. It was like they were opening up their arms to me, welcoming me in for a tight embrace. _"NO!" _Their voices screamed in my head before my chest exploded in fire and the world went black.

**Daryl's POV**

She collapsed to the ground, the gunshot echoing. Somebody screamed and I realized that it was me. I thought Shane was just standing up, but everything went in slow motion as I watched him pull the gun from his waist band and pull the trigger. I didn't see Shane turn the gun on Rick or Rick shoot his friend in the chest. I was already on my feet and barreling to Aria's unmoving body. _Don't be fucking dead. Don't you dare be dead. _Her body lay limply on her side, the back of her shirt rapidly turning a crimson red. I fell to knees, my fingers checking her neck for a pulse. A soft thudding against my fingers had me breathing a momentary sigh of relief. "HERSHEL!" I called out, ripping the shirt off my back and pressing it to the wound. It was chaos. Everyone was in shock and people were screaming and crying.

Her blood quickly began to soak through my shirt. "Goddammit, don't you fucking leave me," I mumbled desperately as I lifted her into my arms, feeling her warm blood drip down my hand as I kept pressure on the wound. "HERSHEL!" I cried out once more and ran to the house. I stormed in with a panic, hearing footsteps behind me. My eyes landed on the large dining table and I ran to it. I didn't see who it was, but they quickly cleared the table, scattering the contents on the floor. I laid her down, brushing the hair away from her face. _Stay with me._ The old man came in with a black bag, calling out orders. "Get her shirt off her. Patricia, I'm going to need a few lights." I stepped in, ripping the blood soaked clothes over her arms and head.

My eyes ran over her scars and I wanted to rip Shane's throat out for causing her more pain. There was a collective gasp, and I looked up from Aria to see everybody frozen in place, staring at her mangled skin. "Quit your fucking staring and save her!" I bellowed. Hershel moved forward, pressing the stethoscope to her chest. The old man shook his head. "She has a collapsed lung. I need to put a tube of some kind in between her ribs to release the excess air." Hershel wasn't speaking to anyone specifically, just explaining. "Maggie, find me a straw. Patricia, get my tools ready. Glenn, Rick, T-Dog, I'm going to need you guys to hold her down. I don't have anything to put her under, and if she wakes I can't have her flailing around while I'm working," Hershel ordered.

The men nodded, helping push Aria to her side. Blood pooled under her, leaving a puddle on the dark wood. I stood beside the table, watching the blood pool under her. "Somebody, get him out of here," I heard Hershel command gently. Soft hands gripped my wrist pulling, but I ripped away turning on the person with a snarl. "I'm not fucking leaving!" "Daryl…" the old man started. "Stop worrying about me and do your fucking job!" I yelled. The conversation ended and I crouched beside the table, wrapping my hand with hers, and another around her wrist, counting out the rapid beats of her heart. "Don't you fucking give up," I whispered over and over watching her lifeless face. _I should have told her. _My eyes burned with tears. _Why did I wait?_ I knew that every moment was precious and I didn't tell her.

The steady thumping against my fingers dulled in seconds, leaving my stomach to drop to the floor. "No, no…" I started as Hershel checked her pulse and breathing. "We're losing her!' he called out and before anything could happen the soft beats stopped. The labored breathing ceased, leaving her chest still. Everybody stood frozen around the table. _No, no, no, no, no. _The tears fell over and I started compressions. I pushed on her chest, feeling the bones crack under the force. "Come on dammit," I growled, leaning down and pushing air into her lungs. I kept the repetition of compressions and breathes going, my own chest heaving from the emotion. "Goddammit, you can't be dead. A bullet isn't going to take you down," I choked, keeping my motions steady never missing a beat as I tried to pump her heart. "Please," I begged, the tears streaming down my face, "I-I love you."

**Aria's POV**

_The grass was like green velvet between my toes. The cottony clouds floated over in unknown shapes. "Bear," I whispered, watching one pass by. My mind was heavy with nostalgia as my eyes swept over the tops of the birch trees. The tiniest of laughs exploded from behind me. I was lying in the forest behind my home in North Carolina. My mind was foggy and I didn't understand how I ended up here. It all seemed too calm and there was this nagging feeling that this wasn't how it was supposed to be. _

_ "Shh, otherwise she'll find us," the little voice giggled. I stood up then, my curiosity winning over and followed the voice. The sweet laughter was gone now, and I wondered if I had imagined it. Arms attacked my legs and waist, pulling me to the ground. I fell with my arms outstretched to catch me. I rolled to my back immediately and was met with three glowing faces. "Haha got you," Trey cooed, grabbing my hair like reins on a horse. Abby and Bailey sat beside me poking my sides and my face. All I could do was stare at my siblings. "I'm dead," I whispered. Abby laughed lightly, wrapping her arms around my neck, "We missed you." She pulled away, their young faces beaming down on me. I pulled the three of them into a tight embrace, "I missed you guys too," I muttered against Trey's head, trying to hold back my tears. _

_ I pulled away and Bailey looked at me with a frown. Her five-year old hand wiped away a stray tear. "Don't cry, Ari. There's no tears in Heaven, besides we're together now," her voice soft and full of knowledge past her age. I gave a bright smile, giving her a quick kiss on the forehead. "You're right, " I said, relishing in their bright smiles. "Game, game," Trey cheered, bouncing on my stomach before jumping off and hitting Abby's arm. "It," he cheered and took off. The four of us chased each other around the forest clearing. _

_ We ran around for hours it seemed, laughing joyously. But I couldn't help this sick feeling in the pit of my gut. There was something missing. I tried pushing the feeling away, but every time I did it came back harder. My mind started questioning itself. 'How did I get here? Wasn't I supposed to be scared?' But the greatest question was why do I feel so lost? "Ari, who are those men?" Abby questioned pointing to the edge of the clearing. I squinted against the sunlight and trying to make out the two men. My lips spread into a giant smile, "My boys." I took off running and jumped into Sam's arms, wrapping my legs against his waist. "Hey, shorty," Sam laughed, his arms squeezing me tightly. I held on to my best friend as long as I could and settled down only to do the same to Dean. His hug was lung-crushing, but it felt so good to feel safe again. I peeled myself off of them, and broke out laughing as my three siblings attacked the grown men, seeing them as giant jungle gyms. My stomach hurt from laughing so much as the boys tried to untangle them. _

_ When they finally got free, the three of us stepped away, letting Abby, Bailey, and Trey entertain each other. But the smiles I was greeted with were gone and now replaced with regret. "What's got you two down?" I questioned. Dean sighed loudly, turning his green eyes on me. "You can't stay, A." "What do you mean I can't stay? If you didn't realize I'm dead," I explained my forehead creased in confusion. "You're not staying dead Aria." "It isn't time yet, lil' sister," Sam added. Tears welled up in my eyes, "But I don't want to leave." They gave me sad smiles, and both of them wrapped me in a massive hug, "We'll see each other again," Dean murmured in my ear. The tears fell. I didn't want to leave, but that nagging feeling was turning into a need; a need to get home. It was like suddenly there was something pulling me away from here. 'I-I love you.' The words echoed loudly in my mind and my heart ripped apart. Small hands found their way in mine and I looked down at my siblings. Bailey kept my hand tightly in hers as Abby spoke up. "Go on Ari, we'll wait for you," her voice comforting and reassuring for someone so young. _

_ A slight breeze overcame me, as the familiar sound of wings sounded behind me. I turned to see Cas as he lay two fingers upon my head, surrounding me in a warm glow._

My lungs protested as I felt air being forced into my lungs. All I registered was agonizing pain shooting through my chest as I began to choke. I tried taking deep breaths, but I couldn't. I tried to focus my eyes as I watched a blurred face standing over me. There was noise, but all I could make out was a jumble of nonsense. I continued to try and breathe normally, but I felt as if I was breathing pins and needles. Panic flooded my body as my mind realized I wasn't getting the air I needed. My eyes focused and I found Daryl leaning over me with tear streaked cheeks. "Hey, hey, stay with me, girl," he commanded, gripping the sides of my face firmly. I didn't understand why I was in so much pain. "C-an't...br-eathe," I barely forced out.

"Roll her on her side," somebody ordered. "She's losing a lot of blood," somebody else commented. I didn't hear the rest because the moment the hands pushed me to my side I screamed in agony. Somebody tried to roll me back, but they were stopped. "She's hurting!" "I know that, but I need to fix this or else we'll lose her again!" I tried to push away the pain, but I couldn't. Every breath that was pulled into my lungs felt like a knife. It was as if I had somebody standing on only the right side of my chest, crushing and stabbing me all at once. My back burned like I was being stabbed with a white-hot iron.

Daryl's face came into sight and my panic eased a bit. He would help me. His rough hands gripped my arms tightly. "Look at me," he commanded, his blue eyes swimming in pain and despair. "Keep your eyes on me." I locked my eyes with him, feeling other hands on my body. "Keep her still," were the last words I heard before another scream ripped its way through me. It was the worst pain ever. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before. All my body told me was to get away from the pain, so I tried. I struggled against the people holding me down, causing my body to flood with even more agony. A new pain flooded me and the scream that was pulled from my lips was unrecognizable even to me.

There was panicked voices yelling all around me, but I could only hear one voice. "Aria, look at me!" I forced my eyes open, everything a bit blurry as I tried to focus on him. "Stay with me. You got that? You can't die," Daryl's voice thick with desperation. I tried to nod my head, but my limbs felt so heavy. My eyelids fluttered shut only to snap back open at Daryl's voice. "Stay awake," he said his voice distant as he if was calling from far away. My eyes fell shut again struggling with consciousness. Daryl was in a full-blown panic, his eyes wired and jaw clench tight. His grip was bone crushing, but it was a distraction from the other pain. "Blood type?" the words breaking through my haze. "O positive," I mumbled.

My body seared with pain. I found the sea of blue once more, staring into them like a lifeline. Daryl struggled to say something, eyes still watery with tears. "I love you," he breathed out. I tried to respond, but a piercing pain ripped through my chest and I fell into blackness once again.

**Daryl's POV**

My heart stopped the movement of my lungs frozen. _Please, please. _I checked her neck for a pulse and found it pumping at a slow, but steady pace. "Passed out from shock," Hershel explained working diligently. Aria's chest rhythmically fell up and down like normal. A tiny clink made a sound every so often and I figured it was fragments of bone and bullet. "She isn't out of the woods yet. She's going to need blood," Hershel added, never once taking his eyes off his task. "How much?" I questioned. "Close to two pints," he answered. "I'll do it," I replied. Nobody argued. Rick, Glenn, and T-Dog hovered in the room, ready if she woke. My knees ached from squatting, but I wasn't going anywhere till she was in the clear. Her skin was a pale bluish color covered in red. I felt sick, my stomach twisted like a pretzel. All I could think of was all the things I would miss if she died. Her sweet laugh that cracked even the deepest frowns, her smile that was so rare you wanted to fight to make it a common action, and her eyes. They were what captivated me in the first place; the color resembling the forest in the morning light, a hint of darkness but shining bright.

I never thought I would find somebody. Kind of always figured I would be alone. I mean who could love some beaten up redneck that could barely be touched or show emotion? Aria found a way to break me out of that shell I forced myself into all my life. She gave me a purpose. I was supposed to protect her. I promised Dean I would and I failed, just like I failed Merle and Sophia. "Patricia, get Daryl ready for the transfusion," Hershel ordered. I was lost in my thoughts not even realizing that Rick sat me in a chair beside the table. The rubber band being tied around my bicep caused me to flinch away from the woman as I remembered what was happening.

She gave me soft 'sorry' as the needle slid in with a slight pinch and I watched the strange contraption collect my blood and pump it into her veins. I kept hearing her screams over and over in my head. "How's she doing doc?" I questioned, my voice sounding hoarse as I tried to keep out of my head. "I've got her breathing normally now. The bullet completely shattered when it hit the rib. She's lost a lot blood though, she could still go into shock," Hershel explained absent-mindedly, continuing to pick out fragments.

The next hour was painful. It was touch and goes for a bit when Hershel removed a fragment and she began bleeding out. I felt like I had my heart ripped from my chest, stomped on and returned back several times. It didn't help that I felt a bit dizzy from the blood donation. I sat in the corner of the room, my arms resting on my knees as I watched Hershel finish closing her up. "We need to keep an eye on her. Watch for infection and make sure she doesn't develop any lung problems," the old man explained washing his tools in a basin of water. "We can move her upstairs in the guest room. I'll check her every few hours. Next time she wakes she's going to be in a world of pain. We still got the pain medication she picked up from that pharmacy. I'll grab the strongest we have." We all nodded. Patricia checked her blood pressure once more before giving us the okay to move her.

T-Dog had stepped forward, but I just shook my head and he backed off. I picked her up, her skin cool against my bare one. She was dead weight in my arms as I marched up the stairs, Rick, Hershel, Carol, and Lori behind me. I had almost forgotten about the others and Shane's dead body. I set her on the bed and the two women began their cleanup. Hershel and Rick left, waiting in the hall, but I couldn't move. I was scared to leave her. _What if something happened? _"Go," Carol mentioned softly. "We'll take care of her." I hesitated, but ended up leaving. "Call me when you're done," my voice empty as I left, closing the door behind me. Her blood was caked on my hands and arms, dried to the texture of my skin.

Maggie and Patricia worked on cleaning up the pool of blood on the table. I came down the stairs with heavy steps and found the others standing around the living room anxiously. Their eyes all fell on me as I entered and leaned against the door jamb heavily. I didn't even know how I felt. I was a jumble of emotion. A heavy silence filled the air as we waited for everyone to gather. Rick looked sick. His face a ghostly white and his eyes full of exhaustion. My eyes had fallen shut, my mind drained. A light touch on my arm pulled me out of my rest. Carol stood beside me with a sad smile. There was fear in her eyes. She had almost lost another person she cared for and there would have been nothing either of us could have done.

"She's out but stable. Just waiting for her to wake," Carol addressed lowly to me. It wasn't a relief for me, not until she was awake. I gave a slight nod and turned my attention to Rick. The sheriff kept his gaze lowered a beaten look on his face. "Randall is gone. We'll start a search for him tomorrow, but chances are that he is long gone. I...I…" he stumbled not sure of what to say. What could you even say? _I'm sorry my best friend went crazy. Sorry that he raped and tried to kill a member of this group. _It wasn't Rick's fault. Aria was the only one that knew how unstable he had become. _Why didn't she tell me? _

"Oh my god!" Beth cried out. We all rushed out the room, fresh adrenaline in our veins. Beth stood in front of the screen door in shock, her eyes glued outside. "What is it?" Rick questioned anxiously. "Impossible," Glenn muttered in disbelief as we all watched a reanimated Shane stumble up the porch steps. The blood that soaked the front of his shirt was proof of death. _How is he a walker? _Fire hot rage coursed through me then and I pushed the others out of my way, my hunting knife in hand. I blew through the door, letting it swing open and hit the side of the house with a loud bang. Shane growled at me as he saw the closeness of food. His mouth opened in want as he trudged over the last step. I walked up to him, air flying in and out of my flared nostrils heatedly. My boot connected with his chest and he flew off his feet and hit the grass. My steps were slow and precise as I made my way down, watching walker Shane struggled to stand up. I smashed my foot down on the bent knee and heard a sickening crack as he fell. His arms stretched out towards me, but I placed both feet on them, pinning them to the earth uselessly. His jaw snapped hungrily as I stared down. I gripped my knife in both hands and in one swift motion, drove the knife deep into the skull of the monster.

My hands shook, my eyes glued to the milky colored eyes that stared lifelessly up at me. Everyone's eyes were on me as I stepped away, sheathing my knife, and stepped into the house without a word. I found my way up the stairs and into the room with Aria. Her face was cleared of the blood and I noticed the damage he had done. The side of her face was turning an angry purple, red. Her lip was scabbing up and I could see the bluish black marks around her throat. I stood against the door frame for a long while, watching her chest rise and fall beneath the sheets. My feet carried me into the room, and I removed my boots, sitting in the chair beside the window. It was like déjà vu except it was her in the bed and not me. I looked out into the darkening night sky. White dots sparkled across the blackness. _I don't ever do this, but if there's anybody up there listening…thank you._


End file.
